‘Morning, Yianni. Nice shorts.’
‘Tassos? What are you doing here?’
Tassos stepped inside without asking permission. ‘Andreas told me you were here for the weekend. I didn’t want you being alone for Easter. My cousin’s family lives here and you’re invited to everything, just like one of the family.’
‘Thanks, Tassos, but-’
‘Honey, who is it?’ The voice came from the bedroom.
‘Just an old friend.’
‘Thank God it’s not a wife. They make such scenes.’
Kouros looked at his feet.
Tassos smiled. ‘I think I should come back later.’
A flash of blonde raced into the room headed toward the front door. ‘No need to, old friend. I have to get to work. Kisses.’ Another dazzling quick smile, a single blown kiss, and gone.
‘What was that?’
‘Four-thirty in the morning on Mykonos.’
‘I think I arrived just in time.’ Tassos laughed again.
Kouros yawned and walked into the kitchen. ‘Coffee?’
‘Sure. Tough break about the minister shutting you down.’
Kouros shrugged. ‘I’m past that. With all the juice involved in this case, we’re lucky they let us catch the bastards who cut the monk’s throat. No chance of getting to Zacharias; he’s too wired into the right people.’
‘Christ, Yianni, you’re too young to be as cynical as I am.’
Kouros shrugged. ‘So prove me wrong.’
‘Wish I could. As I said to Andreas, “The only ones I see likely wanting to hang his ass are the Russians.”’
‘Have any Russian friends we can talk to?’
‘None who’d believe us. We’re just cops, claiming everybody but us is involved in a coverup. No way the Russians are going to take our word for it without checking everything out first. And that means whatever we say gets back to someone involved in keeping things quiet, and bye-bye pension for me.’
‘And a career change for me. Directing traffic if I’m lucky.’
‘In the middle of the National Highway.’
‘So, like I said, “Prove me wrong.”’
Tassos shrugged. ‘I’m sure the Russians know all about the bad press they’re getting here, and the rumors that they’re behind everything that’s gone wrong on Mount Athos. But Russians are a naturally suspicious sort, born and bred on intrigue. So, for working-level Greek cops to appear on their doorstep out of nowhere with a story about some war criminal Mount Athos monk being behind it all smells just too much of setup. They know damn well how much the Greek Church would love to link them to a church politics plot involving Mount Athos. It would make every smoke and mirrors press story and rumor instantly fact.’
Kouros picked up two cups of coffee, handed one to Tassos, and started drinking from the other.
‘Thanks, Yianni, but there’s no way the Russians will believe us. People just don’t confide such serious stuff to total strangers out of the blue without a motive. Unless, of course, they’re insane.’
Kouros paused in mid-sip. ‘I have an idea. Let’s call Andreas.’ He put down the coffee, picked up the landline phone, and dialed.
‘What kind of idea?’
‘A good one, I hope.’ He waited for someone to answer.
‘Hello, Vardi residence.’
‘Chief Kaldis please, it’s Yianni Kouros.’
‘One moment please.’
Kouros looked at Tassos. ‘I think this has a speaker on it.’ He pressed a button on the handset and a few seconds later both men heard, ‘Yianni, what’s up?’
‘Chief, I’m here with Tassos and he filled me in on your conversation about the Russians.’
‘You’re on holiday, Yianni, forget about it. It’s dead and buried.’
‘I have an idea. What if we get the Russians to think they figured out on their own who Zacharias was and what he was up to? And that it was something we didn’t want them to know.’
Andreas did not sound impressed. ‘I think you’re forgetting something. We’re the good guys. Not vigilantes. Nor are we supposed to be helping foreign powers.’
Kouros sounded offended. ‘Who’s talking about helping a foreign power? We’re talking about a known war criminal behind the assassination of a Greek monk. His interest in screwing the Russians is incidental, but it’s a convenient hook to use to hang the bastard.’
Tassos said, ‘Look, I’m not a big fan of the Russians, but I see Yianni’s point, and if he has an idea that works, it might be our only hook.’
They could hear Andreas letting out a breath. ‘So what’s your idea?’
‘You remember Mario. He’s now a sergeant here. I’m staying with him, and he told me that there are a hell of a lot of private jets in for the weekend, including a huge beauty belonging to one of the richest men in Russia.’
‘I know him,’ said Tassos. ‘He has a house on Mykonos, and a friend of mine takes care of things for him here.’
‘Well, he has a reputation as a pretty wild partier, always with an English-speaking entourage, and if we somehow can break into his crowd for a few hours, there just might be someone in there we could tempt with the story.’
There was a noticeable pause on Andreas’ end of the line. ‘Yianni, what sort of shit have you been taking?’
‘No, listen, Chief, if we can get the right guy interested-’
Andreas cut him off. ‘Why on God’s earth would one of the richest men in the world give a rat’s ass about what a monk in Greece is doing to embarrass the Russian Church?’
Tassos answered. ‘As a matter of fact, that might be the only part of what sounds like a wild-ass plan that’s a sure thing. If the rich guy bites, I’m sure it will get back to the right person.’
‘Are you two sharing the same bong?’
Tassos laughed. ‘No, asshole, listen. After the fall of the Soviet Union, some young Russians made a lot of money in highly questionable ways and left Russia to live big capitalist lives elsewhere. A lot of old, ex-socialist types who remained in power back home were jealous of what they called the “oligarchs” and came up with a plan. They offered those newly rich a choice. Share your wealth with us, or Mother Russia will bring you home to stand trial over how you stole from her to make your fortunes. A few examples were made through all-expenses-paid, long-term vacations to the gulag life, and voila, the others started paying. But the oligarchs still are deeply resented, and there’s always someone else wanting a piece of them.
‘Exposing such a serious assault on the Russian Orthodox Church could buy our Mykonian oligarch a hell of a lot of good will. Remember, many of Russia’s current leaders are deeply religious and no strangers to the Russian monastery on Mount Athos. They know what’s at stake there.’
‘Damn you both,’ said Andreas. ‘I’m supposed to be at Lila’s parents’ this evening.’
Kouros spoke. ‘Look, Chief, maybe you’re right and we should forget about it. It’s really just a far-fetched idea, anyway. Not even a plan. We’d have to get you some sort of introduction to the oligarch, find some way to get him to want to hang out with you, and then-’
‘Whoa, what’s with all this “you” crap?’ said Andreas.
‘You’re in charge of the investigation. You’re the only one with enough credibility to be believed. You both speak English, and you’re also the only one of us who fits in with the look of his crowd.’
‘I beg your pardon,’ said Tassos with a smile.
‘What else were you going to say?’ said Andreas. He sounded testy.
‘You have to convince him you’re drunk enough to be honestly confiding secrets to a total stranger at five in the morning in a Mykonos party bar.’
‘Damn, damn, damn. And I bet the plan has to start today.’
‘Don’t see a choice,’ said Kouros. ‘He’s probably here only for one night, then off to wherever for Easter.’
‘Ah, Eastertime on Mykonos,’ said Tassos. ‘A perfect example of spiritual
and temporal coexistence. All of the island’s Good Friday church rituals strictly observed during the day, followed by its nearly as hallowed party traditions through the night.’
‘What time would I have to be there?’
‘Not before two,’ said Yianni.
‘It’s almost two now.’
‘I mean in the morning. These guys don’t come out until two at the earliest.’
‘Great, I can’t wait to tell Lila I’ll be spending Good Friday and Saturday on Mykonos hanging out in bars, getting drunk with wildly partying Russians. Let me talk to her first. Not sure I want to wreck my life here any more than I already have over what sounds about as crazy a plan as any I’ve ever heard.’
‘Thank you,’ said Kouros.
‘I’ll see what I can do about arranging an introduction through my mutual friend,’ said Tassos.
‘Not yet, I have to speak to Lila.’
‘Don’t worry, it won’t be a problem. Besides, she would love to see you.’
‘Who’s “she”?’
‘The lawyer for the oligarch on Mykonos. You remember Katerina. She always asks about you.’
Andreas hadn’t seen Katerina since his promotion to Athens from Mykonos. She always had a thing for him, but he’d somehow managed to avoid her, not an easy thing to do once she’d set her mind on a man. She was a bigger player than most guys, and better at it. ‘Are you smiling?’ asked Andreas.
‘Yes,’ said Tassos.
‘Bastard. Okay, see what you can do and let’s talk later.’
They hung up.
‘What do you think of our chances?’ asked Yianni.
‘About the same as Andreas does. But at least it’ll keep you out of that sort of trouble for a night.’ Tassos pointed toward the bedroom and grinned.
‘Like the Chief said, “bastard.”’ He picked up his coffee.
Tassos patted him on the shoulder. ‘It’s a really good idea, Yianni. But I think we’re all concerned about the same thing.’
‘Losing our jobs?’
‘No, setting something in motion over which we have absolutely no control.’
‘Like pouring gasoline on a campfire in the middle of a tinderbox forest?’
‘Something like that, but let’s not forget who we’re playing with. If these guys get pissed they don’t need gasoline. They’re Russians, they have nukes.’
Kouros swallowed. ‘Maybe I’ll go to church.’
‘Good idea. I think I’ll join you.’
17
Zacharias’ monastery was in full mourning mode, readying itself for the funeral of Christ. At Good Friday morning services, the body of Christ was brought down from the cross and the symbolic shroud of his earthly form placed upon his bier, the epitaphios. Across Greece this was the day of Christ’s wake, a time for paying respects, practising traditions like passing three times beneath the epitaphios for good luck and blessings, and prayer.
Zacharias remembered other funerals and other bodies. Mainly bodies: the unburied, the buried together. The times had demanded it. One must do what must be done on earth as it is in heaven, he thought. There was no choice then, and there was less choice now. Time was running out. The Ecumenical Patriarch would not live forever.
I must make sure that the new Ecumenical Patriarch’s home is here, he thought. The Russians would isolate him from outside influences more than did the Turks. My plans need his ear. The Russians must be vilified. And not just by petty, bribed journalists whose reach rarely exceeded Greece’s borders and few believed anyway. He must validate their words with an unequivocal act of proof.
That would come Sunday, after the three men returned. The tragic passing of the abbot of the Russian monastery would be mourned deeply. But once the new abbot publicly denounced his predecessor’s death as a brutal assassination — from the same source and uncommon poison as the victim’s native Russia stood accused before the world of using in a botched, but horribly disfiguring, attempt to silence the Ukraine’s president — all that was written before would become fact. The Russians would never recover from the impact of those words coming from its own abbot. Only one more death, and the world shall be on a better path to life.
‘So how long do you think we’ll have to stay at your parents?’ Andreas had been standing in the doorway to Lila’s dressing room for ten minutes, talking to her as she sat at her vanity table putting on makeup.
Lila put down the mascara brush and swung around on her chair. ‘Enough already. You’re like a little kid dancing around something he’s afraid to talk about with his mother. What’s on your mind?’
He shrugged. ‘Guilty as charged.’
‘You’d make a lousy crook, I can read you like a book.’
‘You better be the only one who can. Otherwise, I’ll be in a hell of a mess by morning.’
Her eyes narrowed. ‘Why do I think you’re about to tell me you’re taking off again?’
‘Well, only if you say it’s okay. That’s what I told Yianni and Tassos.’
Lila shook her head. ‘As if I have a choice. If I don’t agree, you’d never forgive me.’
Andreas pulled up a chair and sat next to her. ‘That’s not true at all. What they have in mind is crazy anyway. And it’s not worth jeopardizing us.’
Lila smiled. ‘That’s nice to hear.’ She looked at her watch and sighed. ‘We’re late anyway. So, what’s going on?’ She pointed at her belly. ‘Don’t worry, I’m in no condition to do any more stupid things like I did before.’
‘Promise?’
‘Promise.’
Andreas told her everything: from the very first phone call ordering him to Patmos up through his conversation with Tassos and Kouros thirty minutes ago.
When he finished Lila stared at him, not saying a word for a full minute. ‘We’re bringing a baby into this world.’
He looked down. ‘I know. Don’t worry, I’ll stay.’
‘No. You don’t understand. We’re bringing a baby into this world. We must do whatever we can to make it a better place.’
‘I’m not sure that trying to get the Russians to take care of a Greek problem will make the world a better place.’
‘But I’m sure doing nothing will make it worse.’
Andreas smiled. ‘You’re tough.’
Lila let out a breath. ‘But if you’re going to try to pull this off, there’s only one way to get and keep that Russian’s attention beyond a perfunctory “Hello, how are you, nice to meet you.” I know him, and if you want him to include you in his partying…’ She waved her hand in the air. ‘No doubt what you’ll need.’
‘And what would that be?’
She smiled. ‘To put it in the common vernacular, “the hottest piece of ass on the planet.”’
Deadpan, Andreas said, ‘But you have to be at your parents.’
Lila pointed at him. ‘Very good answer.’ Then laughed. ‘So we’ll have to find you the second hottest. And only one, because if you show up with more than one he’ll get insecure, think you’re trying to compete with him. If it’s just you and a woman he’ll bring you into his crowd, like the spider offering its web to the fly. It’s a game these guys play to prove they’re men. They’ll keep you occupied by making you feel important, while hustling the woman away with promises of whatever she wants to hear.’
‘How do you know so much about this?’
‘Remember, I’m the hottest.’ She smiled. ‘Dickless types like that have tried it all on me. But you’re the only smooth-talking stud who… uhh… scored.’
‘Ms Vardi, what language.’
Lila smiled. ‘I wish I could offer you more, but at the moment I’m afraid I can’t.’
‘But I can’t risk using a hooker, and even the hottest female on the force is out of the question. It would look like a setup if the Russian ever found out. And once he hears what I have to say, he’ll try to verify everything. How am I going to find someone by tonight?’
‘I know the perfect person. She’s alread
y on Mykonos, and utterly believable.’
‘What do mean “utterly believable”?’
‘Barbara.’
‘She’s your best friend!’ She also was one of the most unpredictable people on the planet, although Lila and her friends preferred characterizing Barbara’s behavior as ‘spontaneous.’ Andreas attributed their charitable attitude to the fact that Barbara was rich, young, and gorgeous. It was much the same way that people called an old, rich nut-job ‘eccentric,’ rather than the more fitting ‘raving lunatic.’
‘That’s what makes it so believable,’ Lila said. ‘It’s the ultimate male fantasy, right?’ She smiled.
Andreas didn’t know if he should laugh or protest. He decided doing neither was the best choice.
‘Don’t worry, she can handle any man. Only one promise.’
‘Which is?’ As if he hadn’t guessed.
‘I want her returned “unused.”’
‘I promise.’
‘Let me see your fingers, they’re not crossed, are they? After all, we want to make sure “doing the best friend” stays just a fantasy.’
Andreas smiled and waved his fingers in her face. ‘You need not worry, my mind is on other things.’
‘Yeah, right. Now you’re starting to worry me. Just promise you’ll sleep on the couch. I’ll settle for that.’
‘What couch?’
‘Where do think you’ll be staying? It has to be at Barbara’s house. How do you think the Russians are going to believe you if you’re not…’ Lila stopped, as if there were another word she’d decided not to add.
He wondered if she was having second thoughts.
‘Just promise.’
‘I promise.’ He leaned over and kissed her cheek.
‘I love you.’
He smiled. ‘Me, you too.’
‘Okay, time to get you laid.’ Lila laughed.
Andreas tried to.
Evening services on Good Friday on Mykonos started at seven in the old town’s central churches of Kiriake, Metropolis, and Panachra. At precisely nine, each church’s clergy and worshipers left their church in separate processions carrying their church’s epitaphios along a prerranged route, winding past the other two churches before ending up back at their own. It represented the funeral of Christ, and Mykonians and visitors lined the route, some standing on freshly painted balcones sprinkling the participants below with a mixture of rose water and perfumes, the rodhonoro used on Christ’s body when taken down from the cross.
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