by Elena Aitken
Lisa nodded, instantly guilty and defensive. “I’m not trying to make things hard on you, Morgan. I’m not. I told you, what happened today had nothing to do with me.” She grabbed a napkin and twisted it in her hands. “And sometimes I forget that you’re my boss, but I promise, I’m not going to screw this up. I love my job and the Lodge. I won’t mess with it, not for anything.” Or anyone, she echoed in her head.
“You’re beautiful and smart and so great with kids. You’re so much more than all that.”
“I know.” She said the words, but her thoughts turned to Jason, who’d given her an unbelievably sexy smile while he was busy being an ass. Just thinking of the earlier incident aggravated her. Something about him got under her skin. And she hated it when men did that to her. Especially when she was sworn off them.
Morgan picked at the pile of cheesy chips in front of her and pulled one free from the stack. “I’m not going to get all therapist with you, but—”
“Good.”
Morgan frowned at her. “But,” she said with emphasis. “There has to be a reason you shy away from relationships.” She popped the chip into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully for a moment. “What was your mom and dad’s relationship like?”
Lisa froze, her drink halfway to her mouth. Morgan had hit close to home. A little too close. She swallowed hard and took a sip of her drink. “It was fine,” she lied. “So your amateur therapy skills are seriously flawed.”
She stuffed another nacho chip in her mouth to keep from saying more. Her parents’ relationship had been far from fine. In fact, Lisa hadn’t seen her dad since she was six and he told her he was going to the store. He never came back. She wasn’t about to tell Morgan that, though. Even if she was the closest friend Lisa had. There was no doubt Morgan would come up with all kinds of theories surrounding Lisa’s absentee father and her intense need for male attention. And the worst part was, she wouldn’t be far off.
“Look,” Lisa said after a moment. “Things have been better lately, right? I mean, there haven’t been any complaints. Including today,” she added pointedly. “So, let’s not mess with it. No setups. Just let things be. Deal?”
Morgan examined her for a moment before nodding. “It’s a deal. Because honestly, I don’t want anything to affect your job. You’re too good—I can’t lose you because of a silly reputation.”
A reputation. She hated that word. But that’s what it was. For better or worse. “Okay, good. No men.”
“At least for a few weeks.” Morgan smiled. “And in the meantime, I’ll talk to Bo, and we’ll see if we can set you up on a real date in a few weeks.”
Lisa groaned and rolled her eyes. So much for no setups. Bo was the outdoor activities director at the Lodge, who also happened to be the love of Morgan’s life. Despite all her friend’s protesting about Lisa’s flirting, they both knew she wanted to see Lisa happily settled the way she was.
“I told you—”
“Well, you don’t have a choice, because I’m going to make it happen.” Morgan flashed her a brilliant smile, and Lisa shook her head with a smile of her own. “And guess what? I just spoke with Andi the other day and she’s going to bring the baby up to the Lodge for a visit. She wasn’t sure if Colin could make it or not, but it will be good to see her and meet the baby finally.”
Andi and Colin were well loved around the Lodge. They’d fallen in love there during a Christmas storm, and their relationship had become a bit of a legend among the guests. Especially after their wedding the following year. And now with a baby, Andi and Colin had the love story everyone wanted. Everyone, including Lisa. Even if she didn’t admit it.
“That reminds me,” Morgan changed tracks again. “I need to call Bo. I’ll be back in a second, okay?”
Lisa nodded and Morgan slipped out of her chair. “I’ll be here.” As Morgan walked away, she mumbled under her breath, “Not flirting with anyone.”
She picked up another chip but discarded it back on the pile and sat up to scan the room for the first time. The Grill usually held a mixture of guests and off-shift employees, and tonight was no different. There were the usual clusters of Lodge staff members, who were likely out for a good time. They wanted to drink too much, play some pool and do a whole lot of flirting with whoever was around. That was the group Lisa usually hung out with. She raised her drink in a wave when a few of them looked in her direction. But she turned away before she could make eye contact with anyone. She was serious when she’d told Morgan she’d changed.
Lisa was sick of her reputation, and she wanted nothing more than to be rid of it. There was a reason she flirted with guys so much: if she were honest, she loved the attention. But it wasn’t enough anymore. It hadn’t been for a while. What she really wanted was someone who’d think the world of her. Someone who cared about her, and asked her about her dreams and goals. She wanted someone who loved her and wanted to be with her. Which was the other reason she’d decided to turn her life around. Not only did she want to protect her job, but she also knew she wouldn’t get what she wanted, doing what she was doing.
And even if she wasn’t ready to admit it to her friend, Lisa wanted a relationship. A real one. And despite the fact that she absolutely loved the Lodge, recently her thoughts had turned to leaving. Maybe it was the only way to get what she really wanted?
It was too much to think about. She sighed and drained the last of her drink. The way the night was going, she was definitely going to need another. She took a quick look around, and not seeing the waitress, decided to head straight to the bar.
It was a busy night in the Grill, and Lisa had to squeeze her way through a bit of a crowd to get to the front of the bar. She angled her shoulders and pushed her way through a small gap, but her foot caught on a stool and she stumbled, falling into the man who stood next to her.
“Oh.” She caught herself and twisted to face forward.
“Are you—”
She turned so she faced the man, and looked directly in Jason’s eyes. His words died on his lips as they turned into a smile.
“Well, hello again.”
His eyes were the brightest shade of green she’d ever seen. For a moment, she was at a loss for words. He was the last person she thought she’d run into. And definitely the worst at that moment.
Lisa swallowed hard. “I’m sorry. I tripped a little. I didn’t mean to push you.”
Jason smiled, and she couldn’t help but notice a little dimple she hadn’t seen earlier. “It’s fine,” he said. “I can hold my own.”
“I’m sure you…I didn’t mean to…” Lisa squeezed her eyes shut for a second and tried to pull herself together. When she opened them again, he smiled at her. Borderline laughed at her, in fact. “Well, I’m sorry I pushed,” she said finally. Aware that he watched her, she turned away and tried to get the bartender’s attention.
“Let me buy you a drink.”
What? It was only a few hours ago he’d been making a point that he wasn’t interested in her. A very solid point. Or was he interested? He’d thrown so many mixed messages at her, she didn’t even know anymore. Lisa turned slowly and narrowed her eyes. “I’m good, thanks.” She looked away again and raised her arm at Dan, who tended bar. He saw her, smiled and made his way toward her.
“Hey, Lisa. What can I get you?”
“A spicy Caesar.” She returned his smile. “And probably one for Morgan, too.”
“Done.”
Dan turned his back to make the drinks and Lisa reached for her purse, which was always slung across her body. It wasn’t.
“Dammit.” She looked around as she tried to remember whether she’d grabbed it from the Cub Club before she’d left. She hadn’t.
“Don’t worry,” Jason said. “I’ve got it.”
Lisa didn’t know whether she was more annoyed that he’d read the situation so perfectly, or that he was trying to be nice.
“You don’t have—”
“I got it,” Jason said again. He h
anded Dan his credit card as the bartender returned with the finished drinks. Dan raised an eyebrow in Lisa’s direction and turned away.
Lisa could only shake her head and mumble a thank-you. No doubt by the time she got back to the staff apartments later, there’d be some story about her and Jason.
“That’s it?”
“I said thank you,” Lisa repeated. “I told you it wasn’t necessary. Dan could have put them on my tab.” She picked up the glasses. Needing some space between them, she tried to push her way through the crowd that had only grown larger while she’d been standing there. “I should be getting back.”
“Hey.” Jason grabbed her arm. “I wanted to apologize for earlier.”
Lisa froze.
“I didn’t mean for there to be any kind of misunderstanding or bad feelings between us.”
Lisa turned and looked at him again. He really was good-looking, more than good-looking. But she wasn’t going to let that cloud her mind. “There’s nothing between us.” She lied, because the way her body reacted to his touch, there was definitely something between them.
“You’re beautiful,” he continued, and she melted a little bit. “But I didn’t—”
She jerked her arm away. There it was: the but. And she wasn’t going to stick around and listen to it again. He’d done enough damage for one day. “It’s fine,” she said. “I’m not interested, remember?” The lies came fast, but they didn’t come easy and if she hung around too much longer, she might be tempted into telling the truth. That she really was interested in him, or at least she might be if things were different, much different. She took one more look at him and the dimple she desperately wanted to touch. Lisa exhaled hard. “Excuse me.” And before he could say another word, she ducked away, found a gap in the crowd, and made her escape.
~ * ~
Jason watched her walk across the room, back to her table, and for at least the dozenth time that day, he wished he hadn’t been such an ass to her earlier. Something about her was different. Sure, she was clearly beautiful and probably had no problem getting the attention of any man in the place. Hell, probably anywhere. But there was something else, too. Something he was positive all those men who gave her attention didn’t see. But he saw it; he just couldn’t quite put his finger on it. Not yet.
An unfamiliar twinge, deep in his gut, pulled him toward Lisa. He hadn’t been so interested in a woman for a very long. Not since he first met Nikki. And even then, it wasn’t the same. His feet moved in Lisa’s direction, his eyes not leaving her. It was ridiculous, and she clearly didn’t want to talk to him—not that he could blame her—but he needed to apologize. Make her accept his apology. Even if he didn’t understand why.
“Jason.”
He froze at the familiar voice. It had been years, exactly four. But he’d been expecting it. Jason turned slowly, not bothering to hide his disdain. “Cousin. It’s been a long time.”
Conrad Porter, his first cousin on his father’s side, three years his senior, stood in front of him, and looked every bit the smug, know-it-all Jason remembered him to be. “Well, if you bothered to come to any of our family functions instead of hiding up North in that…camp, you wouldn’t be such a stranger.”
Jason swallowed the bile that rose in his throat. “Well, cousin. Some of us have to work for a living.” Conrad and his younger brother, Chase, had both worked in the family business since high school graduation, if you called golfing all day and wining and dining clients working. Neither of them were strangers to the soft life, and for whatever reason, they couldn’t seem to understand why Jason wanted nothing to do with it. He preferred to work for a living, and pave his own way. Sure, there’d been talks about Jason going to work for the property management firm, and he hadn’t totally ruled it out. Nothing would make his father happier. But if and when he decided to trade it all in for the corporate life, he’d do it on his own terms. Terms that included legitimately working hard.
Conrad slapped him on the back and left his arm draped around Jason’s shoulders. Jason had to swallow his disgust. It wasn’t just his lazy ways that caused the animosity between them. The bad blood between them ran far deeper than that.
“Don’t be that way, Cuz.” Conrad turned Jason and smoothly led him toward a table filled with his relatives. “One day we’ll convince you to join our ranks, and then you’ll see just how much work it really is.”
He doubted it but there was no point saying so.
“Come have a drink and let’s catch up.”
He sighed, and accepted the situation. After all, he was at a family reunion. He should probably make some attempt to actually reunite with his family. His smile was forced, but he doubted very much that anyone would notice they were too caught up in the details of their own lives. With a shake of his head, he resigned himself to at least an hour of small talk before he could get away, and nodded his greeting to the various people.
Jason strategically chose a seat near his first cousin, Emily. She’d always been one of his favorite cousins. “Nice to see you, Em.” He dropped a kiss on her cheek and once he was settled in his seat, tried to peek and see whether he could see Lisa. Too many people stood between him and her table, so reluctantly, he turned his attention to the conversation.
“We’re glad you came,” Emily said. “It’s been too long.”
“Some would say not long enough,” Jason said, and when Emily frowned, he immediately felt bad. “How have you been? Keeping busy?”
She nodded, her kind smile returning. “I’m trying.”
“Where’s that husband of yours?” Jason had always liked Emily’s husband, Nolan.
“He was pulled into a game of darts.”“ She pointed in his direction and as if he could sense her, Nolan turned and waved. Emily smiled before she turned her attention back to Jason. She put her hand on Jason’s arm and squeezed. “We do miss you. I know it’s been hard since—”
“It’s been fine.”
“Jason.”
He shook his head. “I don’t want to talk about it.” And he didn’t. The last time he’d seen most of the people in the room was at Nikki’s funeral. And he knew they meant well, but they also didn’t know the whole truth. As if a hit-and-run killing his fiancée wasn’t bad enough, he’d had to deal with the truth of where she’d been that night and with whom. His entire life had imploded that night, and learning the truth once and for all about the woman he’d thought he’d loved, and the man he’d considered one of his closest friends, sent him into a dark spiral.
He’d protected his family from the worst of it; after all, that’s what family did. If they knew the truth—that it was their golden boy, Conrad’s house, Nikki had been coming back from that night—it would have fractured the entire family. Even in his grief, Jason wouldn’t do that. But he also couldn’t stick around and watch everyone behave as if his life hadn’t been torn apart. And when he left, he’d sworn never again would he put himself and his heart out there the way he had for Nikki.
“Honestly,” he said to Emily after a moment. “I just want to get through this little trip.” He forced a smile. “Now tell me what’s new with you? Don’t tell me they’ve actually brainwashed you into liking things at Porter Properties?”
“It’s not that bad.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and twirled her straw. “You know there’s a spot for you? We all want you there, Jason. We need your management skills. Please tell me you’ll consider it?”
He took a long pull on his beer before he answered her. The truth was, he had considered it. After Nikki died, all he’d wanted was to get as far away from his family and his life as possible. He’d done that. Managing a crew on an oil rig in Northern Canada had accomplished that perfectly. But his dad was getting older and he wanted to retire. He’d pressured Jason to come on board with Porter Properties before it was too late and his cousins weaseled their way into the top management positions. His father and his uncle had worked too hard building up a business to have it tur
ned over to Conrad, who would no doubt run it into the ground. Besides, he was getting a little stir crazy with Northern living. Maybe it was time for a change. Maybe it was time to go home.
“You never know, Em. I might actually consider it one of these days.”
Her smile lit up her face. She squealed and called over to her brothers. “You’ll never guess—”
“Whoa.” Jason silenced her. “Let me think about it a bit more before you go announcing anything to anyone, okay?”
Emily nodded, but she didn’t bother hiding her smile. “Okay, but I think it’s great. You know I love the family business, but...”
“But?”
“I think it might be time for me to take a break.” She patted her stomach. “At least by summer.”
It took Jason a minute to figure out what his cousin was getting at, but as soon as she rolled her eyes and held her arms out in front of her, he got it. With a whoop, Jason jumped out of his seat and pulled his cousin into his arms for a big hug. The familiar twinge of regret was there, too. But it was overshadowed by his genuine happiness for Emily. The pain that he’d lost his opportunity for a family when he lost Nikki was always present, but over time it faded, just the way his hurt did.
“That’s great news.” His smile was genuine. “Let me buy you a drink. A ginger ale, of course.”
“Of course.”
To Jason’s surprise, the next hour flew by and he got swept up in Emily’s plans, and he found that he enjoyed some of the conversation with people he hadn’t seen in years. It wasn’t nearly as painful as he’d thought it would be. Especially because he kept an eye on Lisa the entire evening. She was beautiful and if he wasn’t sure that he’d be shot down again, he’d happily go talk to her again. But he wasn’t a fool and only a fool would keep going back for more when it was perfectly clear that she had no interest in him.
Not that he could blame her. He’d done it to himself. He hadn’t exactly been warm and fuzzy, and for the life of him he couldn’t figure out why he’d been such a jerk. Of course she wasn’t going to be interested in him when he’d treated her like a booty call. But it was probably for the best, anyway. He wasn’t interested. At least he shouldn’t be.