She touched her tongue to her dry lips and continued. “Never once did he apologize for nearly killing me, his wife, but instead screamed at me to never sneak up on him again. That’s when I knew it was over between us. Completely over.”
“And that’s when you finally decided to file for divorce,” he guessed.
“Yeah.” Feeling that awful tension building within her again, brewed out of bitterness, she stood and moved around the small, stuffy room. “I’d first asked him for a divorce about six months before this incident, nd he said no,” she told him, revealing more personal sues Josh had no knowledge of.
“I can’t imagine Anthony’s refusal would stop you rom doing anything you wanted to after the first year f marriage you experienced,” Josh said, a wry note to is voice. “What made you stay?”
She was still wearing the sage suit she’d worn to work that day, and the lined jacket was beginning to feel hot and suffocating. Since there was little chance of nem leaving for the night, she shrugged out of the ticket, revealing a cream silk camisole. “I thought maybe if he knew I had no qualms about leaving him, nings would change between us,” she admitted, ealdng now just how naive she’d been about the possibility of Anthony taking an active role in their marriage. The man had been too selfish to offer what she’d ultimately needed from him. Love, and maybe a little of his me and attention. And she’d wanted things he’d had to intention of giving her, like children, and being a family. “If anything, our marriage got worse. Shortly after that confrontation, I found evidence of an affair, which of course he denied.” Folding the coat, she laid it eatly over one of the chairs. “The stress and tension between us accumulated until I just couldn’t take it anymore. The incident with the gun was the final traw.”
He swore and scrubbed a hand along his jaw.
She shrugged, having had many months to get accus- omed to the truth. One of the biggest clues of his infielity had been that he hadn’t made love to her, or even touched her, in so much longer than was normal for a tarried couple.
Slipping her shoes off her aching feet, she left then by the side of the bed farthest from the door. “I through that last morning together would be the end of all th heartache and misery, but it seems it was just the begin- ning.”
“Ah, Paige…” He pushed off the dresser and started toward her, compassion glimmering in his gaze.
“Don’t.” She held up a hand to ward him off, no wanting his tenderness, pity or the apology she knew was hovering on his lips. And there was also the problem of her being trapped in between two beds and hi solid body.
He stopped, confusion transforming his features “Don’t what?”
“Don’t you dare apologize, because right now i means nothing when my life is hanging somewhere be tween survival and hell.” The guilt that flashed in hi eyes confirmed that she’d read him correctly. “I don’t want this, but I’m forced into it because of Anthony. I’m tired of always looking over my shoulder, and I’m tired of people telling me what to do.”
He took a step toward her, thought better of the ide when she glared at him, and halted again. “Paige-”
“I know I have no choice in the matter,” she recited another educated guess at what he would have said “That none of this will end until this case is closed and over, but that doesn’t make me any less angry. I had enough of this sort of upheaval when I was married to Anthony, this kind of uncertainty and fear. I thought i ended when he died, that I could get on with my life and have a semblance of normalcy. Now, everything i falling apart, and there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it.” Her voice caught, faltered, and she struggle to maintain her composure. “I don’t even have a house to live in anymore.”
“The detectives on the case will need a few days to search for evidence, which I’m doubtful they’ll find.” His mouth thinned in resignation. “The house should be cleaned up and back in order shortly after that. You could probably be back in by the end of next week.”
Her brows rose. “And you think I actually want to go back there, after what happened tonight?” Her tone of voice said he was crazy for making such a suggestion. “I can’t go back, because nothing will ever be the same again. It was bad enough when you discovered the hidden safe, but now someone has actually invaded my home, pawed through my possessions, and tainted everything in that house.”
“I know,” he said quietly, as if he understood, but didn’t quite know what to do to ease her uncertainties.
She made it easy on him. “Since I can’t bring myself to spend another night in that house, I’ll be hiring someone next week to pack up all my belongings except for the necessities, and have everything shipped to my sister’s place. Once this is over, I’m leaving, Josh. Once you slap handcuffs on Carranza, I’ll be on the first flight back to Connecticut.”
His gaze flickered over her face, so tender, so cherishing. “I’d really like you to rethink your plans.”
He all but wore his heart on his sleeve, and that open display of emotion was nearly her undoing. She was horrified to feel a rush of hot tears burning the back of her eyes and tightening her throat. She was incapable of speaking, which was probably for the best because she didn’t want to hurt him any more with her answer, and there was no way she would ever offer him false hopes or promises for a future together. Their situation was hopeless, for so many reasons… and everything tied into Anthony.
Anthony had brought them together. And Anthony would tear them apart.
Needing to be alone before she finally gave in to the emotional release hovering just beyond the superficial self-control she’d managed to maintain all day, she escaped to the only place that afforded her any privacy: the bathroom.
SITTING ON his rumpled, unmade bed across from Paige’s, Josh watched her sleep during the early, shadowed hours of morning, unable to remember the last time he’d seen her so peaceful. She looked breathtakingly beautiful with her features softened, and her silky auburn hair tousled around her face. Her relaxed mouth even curved ever-so-slightly into a sweet, serene smile. It was all an illusion, he knew, because as soon as she woke up, reality would intrude and steal away the tranquility touching her expression.
But until then, he enjoyed the quiet simplicity of just looking at her and letting his imagination indulge in some pleasant, sensual thoughts. His gaze roamed slowly down the length of her as she lay on her side, her hands tucked beneath her pillow. The motel’s outdated air-conditioning hadn’t sputtered out enough cool air to make the clanking, chugging sound worth a sleepless night, so they’d opted to leave the unit off. As a result, the room was warm, and Paige had kicked off her covers.
Since he hadn’t grabbed any clothing for her at the house, last night he’d offered her one of his T-shirts to sleep in, which she filled out incredibly well. The soft cotton molded to her full breasts, and he could see the rosy crests through the white material. He imagined brushing his fingers over the tips, teasing them to hardness, then soothing that ache with the slippery wetness of his tongue, the heated depths of his mouth…
She sighed softly through parted lips, and rolled to her back. The full swell of her breasts, crowned with tight, beaded nipples, pushed enticingly against the shirt she wore. His mouth watered, his body quickened, and his blood heated and spread low in his belly, then lower still, until it gathered in his loins.
The hem was bunched around her hips, affording him an intimate view of white, silky panties, and sleek, long legs. In his mind, he pictured sliding his hands along the back of her calves, stroking the sensitive spot he’d discovered behind her knee the night they’d made love, too long ago. Envisioned skimming his fingers up her smooth thighs, using his palms and the stroke of his tongue to cajole them to part, then pressing his mouth to the silk covering that intimate, feminine part of her to taste her passion and bring her to the brink of desire. And then, once she’d found that first exquisite release, he’d strip away that flimsy barrier, wrap her thighs tight around his hips, and ease deep, deep inside he
r, until she climaxed again and took him with her…
A low moan purred in her throat-as if his thoughts had somehow slipped into her mind-and her legs shifted, rubbing sensually, restlessly together. Beneath the zipper of his jeans he grew hard, uncomfortably so. Her breathing deepened, her chest rising and falling as heavily, as rapidly, as his own.
Christ. Deciding to end the physical torment he’d inflicted upon himself, with no relief in sight, he flopped back onto the mattress and squeezed his eyes shut, attempting to focus his mind on anything except losing himself in the lush warmth of Paige’s body, anything but the way his thoughts could seemingly become a part of her own…
Her response to him, even in sleep, shouldn’t have surprised him. They’d always shared a special connection, which they’d blanketed in a nice, cozy friendship because of her marriage to Anthony. But that subliminal bond had always been there, even if she’d beer physically off-limits. Invisible lines had been drawn from the moment Anthony had laid eyes on her and staked a claim-Josh had been there that fateful night and clearly remembered the events that had irrevocably changed Paige’s life.
She’d come to Miami with her sister, Valerie, for a weeklong summer vacation, intending to soak up the sun on the beach during the day, and enjoy the loca nightlife in the evenings. When he’d first spotted Paige from across the crowded, popular Miami nightclut where Anthony had coerced him into meeting him, the first thing that had caught Josh’s attention was her natural beauty. She stood out from the rest of the heavily made-up women wearing tight, clingy clothes meant to tempt and entice the men in the bar. Such brazer women were more Anthony’s style and had never appealed to Josh, which made Paige’s fresh face and her calf-length, sarong-style dress all the more attractive to him.
As he’d surreptitiously watched her from the bar while shooting the breeze with Anthony and nursing a beer, he noticed other things that appealed to him: her vibrance, her quick smiles and lilting laughter, and those guileless green eyes that seemed so clear and bottomless.
Unfortunately, Paige had snared Anthony’s attention as well, though Josh never would have guessed how deeply Anthony’s interest had run or his purpose for pursuing her. At the time, he’d suspected Anthony’s competitive nature had been part of the initial chase-Paige would never know that Josh had slid off his bar stool to approach her first, only to have Anthony beat him to the punch. Before both of Josh’s feet could hit the floor, Anthony had purchased a bottle of the wine Paige had been drinking and was heading across the crowded room to deliver it to her personally.
Josh didn’t bother to rise to Anthony’s silent challenge. He’d seen Anthony work his charm on enough women to know that he didn’t stand a chance. So he’d watched his friend weave his magic and seduce the unsuspecting woman-all the while hoping Anthony’s interest in Paige would eventually wane, as it had with all the other women he dated.
This time was different. This time, Anthony had underlying motivations even Josh would never have imagined possible. Three months later, Anthony had moved Paige from Connecticut and married her in a lavish ceremony with over three hundred guests attending. Within a year of that joyous occasion, Anthony’s obsession with Paige finally became clear. Anthony hadn’t wanted a wife, but an asset, someone wholesome and sweet to complete his warped perception of “having it all.” Ambition. Power. Wealth. And a beautiful, genteel wife on his arm when the need arose.
Anthony’s interest had diminished, just as it always did, just as Josh thought it would, leaving Paige disillusioned, confused and struggling to understand what had gone wrong. And the only thing he could do was offer her friendship and support, when he wanted to give her so much more.
Josh opened his eyes and stared at the water-stained ceiling, wondering, not for the first time, how differently things would have turned out if he’d accepte Anthony’s challenge that night at the club and pursue Paige as well. Certainly falling in love with her was given, considering how his feelings for her ha evolved. And there was no doubt he would have mar- ried her. Likely, by now, they would have had at leas one baby, maybe two…
His stomach twisted with so many regrets. He still wanted those things with her, but knew he didn’t stand much of a chance when it came to competing with th bitter memories instilled by Anthony’s egotistical aspirations.
He thought about the possibility of her being preg nant with his child, but as much as the idea of having a baby with Paige appealed to him, that particular wisl was a selfish one on his part. A child would give him a stronger tie to Paige, a bond that would last forever, ye he knew she might resent being thrust into a relation ship with him-one she clearly didn’t want.
Feeling restless, and frustrated at his inability to control the future, he left the bed and went to the only win dow in the room, pushing aside the heavy drapes a few inches. The first fringes of dawn were spreading acros the sky, promising a warm, sunny Saturday. He hate to waste such a perfect day inside this awful mote room or at the boutique. And he knew without a doub Paige wasn’t mentally ready to return to the bead house.
The past few weeks had been hell for Paige, and he wanted to offer her a small slice of heaven to offset the burdens she’d had to bear. He wanted to see the luste in her eyes again, wanted to hear her laughter, and would sell his soul to see one of her genuine, dazzling smiles.
He needed that. So did she. And he was confident a quick, weekend getaway would restore both of their spirits and put them in a better frame of mind for what lay ahead. Maybe his idea might work to his favor, too, and prove to Paige that marriage to a cop wasn’t always heartache.
Spying a small doughnut shop across the street, he smiled, an idea forming. He needed to contact Reynolds, apprise him of his plans and get his approval. Since he didn’t want to use the phone in the room and possibly wake Paige when she needed the rest, he figured he could call Reynolds on his cell phone as he walked the short distance to get him and Paige breakfast-and still keep an eye on their motel room.
Since he’d been unable to sleep, he’d showered and changed into jeans and a collared knit shirt earlier. Securing his Beretta into his holster, he put on his lightweight sports coat and slipped quietly from the room, making sure the door was locked behind him.
When he returned ten minutes later, Paige was curled up on her side facing the door, but still asleep. Now that his plans were in motion, and he had Reynolds’s wholehearted consent, he was anxious for them to be on their way.
Setting the foam cup of freshly brewed coffee on the nightstand in between the two beds, along with a warm, fragrant cinnamon-streusel muffin, he hunkered down in front of Paige and gently blew the scented curls of steam her way.
She drew a deep breath, and her nostrils flared.
Grinning, he sent another aromatic draft her way.
She moaned, the sound low and appreciative.
One more time, and her eyes fluttered open, unfocused, but beautiful nonetheless.
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” he murmured.
“It was, until you woke me up,” she groused. Then a slow smile curved her mouth and she stretched lan guidly, making his body quicken. “I was having a wonderful dream.”
He chuckled warmly, remembering his earlier erotic thoughts. “Was I in it?” he dared to ask.
A flush deepened the rosy hue of her complexion “Maybe.” Her voice held husky nuances, whether a re- sidual of sleep or arousal, he wasn’t sure.
She might have been fuming mad at him last night and gone to bed upset, but this morning there was no trace of bitterness. Admittedly, her anger never lasted long with him. They argued and moved on. She didn’t hold grudges like some women, didn’t punish by allowing her animosity to develop into a cold attitude that lasted for days.
He figured her tirade had been a long-overdue release, and a therapeutic one at that. A person could only take so much pressure before they blew, and he suspected yesterday’s events had pushed Paige to he limit. This morning, however, she appeared refres
hed and receptive, though he didn’t doubt for a moment that the case wasn’t far from her mind.
Her light mood encouraged him, and he took advantage of it. “Maybe I could persuade you to forgive me for interrupting such a great dream.” Standing, he readjusted her pillows against the headboard and motioned for her to sit up, which she did, dragging the sheet with her to cover up her bare legs. He found her sudden bout of modesty endearing, especially since he’d already indulged in eyeing every inch of her. “] went across the street and got us coffee and fresh-baked muffins.”
She pushed her hair out of her face and considered his bribe. A teasing gleam brightened her green eyes, giving him a glimpse of the fun-loving Paige he’d met three years ago. “You’d take advantage of a woman’s weaknesses that way?”
Sitting on the edge of the bed next to her hip, he handed her one of the cups of coffee. “Just yours,” he admitted, enjoying their flirtatious banter. His hopes for a relaxing, pleasant weekend soared.
She wrapped her fingers around the warmth and took a sip of the fragrant brew. “Umm…” She closed her eyes briefly, savoring the rich flavor. “This is wonderful.”
He smiled at her blissful expression. “So is the muffin.” He broke off a piece of the spiced cake topped with sweet, crunchy streusel and held it to her lips. “Try a bite.”
She hesitated, the intimacy of the situation swirling between them. Then, as if accepting his unspoken challenge, she allowed him to feed her the muffin. He purposely touched his fingers to her lips, dragged his thumb along the corner of her mouth to catch a crumb. Awareness flared in her eyes, coiled deep in his belly, and spurred a reckless desire he didn’t bother to curb. Not here. Not now.
Not anymore.
Eyes locked, he slid his hand around to the back of her neck and slowly dipped his head toward hers. His thumb nudged her chin up as his mouth descended. To his extreme pleasure, she didn’t protest his bold move.
Finally reaching his destination, he ran the tip of his tongue over her lips, flicking teasingly. Her lashes fluttered closed and her lips parted on a soft sigh of surrender that touched him on a dozen different levels. She was so open. So giving. So trusting.
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