by Raine Koh
When they finally parked the car, the sun had set and they got out of the car wearing Power Ranger masks. Mimi glanced over at the Rainbow Bridge; the white bridge she saw before had now transformed into a pretty array of colours. The wires supporting the bridge were lit up with fairy lights and the pillars were illuminated with dashes of red, green and blue. Mimi looked around her and realised that it wasn’t just the bridge, but the whole island of Odaiba looked extremely dreamlike at night. She pointed at a humongous ferris wheel decorated with colourful lights. “Are we going on that?” she asked, awe-struck. The blue ranger nodded and took her hand as they both ran towards the magical ferris wheel.
“Zepp Tokyo,” said Mimi, gesturing to the livehouse located right next to the ferris wheel. “It’s a very famous livehouse. All the famous J-rock bands performed there. I want to perform there!”
“You want to take a photo in front of it?” Yuki suggested, fishing out his mobile phone. The pink ranger nodded and posed next to Zepp Tokyo. He laughed and said, “I’m sure you’ll perform there one day!”
“I hope so,” she said. She noticed that his mobile phone wallpaper was an old photo that she took with Yuki when they were in Singapore. As they both stood in line for the ferris wheel ride, Mimi wondered why he hadn’t deleted it.
“Are you feeling cold?” Yuki asked, facing the pink ranger.
“A little bit, it’s never this cold in Singapore,” she replied, rubbing her hands together.
Yuki placed his arm around her, holding her close to his side.
Mimi’s face turned red and she was glad that she was wearing a mask. Finally it was their turn and they entered the ferris wheel’s carriage. Once inside, Mimi and Yuki took off their masks. Even though it was only the two of them in the carriage, they sat side by side. The carriage was slowly rising up. Mimi looked out of the window and the night view took her breath away. She thought that it resembled a field of golden lights. The carriage continued to rise higher and higher and everything below looked so small. She looked over at Yuki, only to realise that he had been looking at her all this while. He smiled softly at her. She wondered why her heart felt so heavy suddenly.
“Yuki, I’m currently writing a new song. It’s about chasing stars.”
“Chasing stars?”
“The light from the stars takes millions of years to reach Earth. Stars we see in the sky may have died thousands of years ago. Some stars are billions of light years away; it would be billions of years before we notice that the star is no longer shining. Some stars are just not meant to be together and some stars are just impossible to reach,” she said, looking down.
Yuki reached out and held both her hands in his. She looked up in surprise as he placed her hands on his cheeks. “But I am alive now and my heart belongs to you and it has never stopped belonging to you.” He leaned towards Mimi and kissed her gently on her lips. Her hands remained on his face as she kissed him back. The ferris wheel carriage was now beginning its downward descend. Mimi knew that compared to when they were in Singapore, their situations right now were different but what she felt for him was the same. But then, would these circumstances tear them apart again? The ride was going to be over and she wondered if this was going to just be a beautiful dream. They put on their masks again. He held on to her hand as they stepped out.
“The thing is, this is the kind of relationship I can give you. We need to hide behind masks in public and no one must know about us. It may be the only way we can protect each other. But when we are alone together, I promise not to hide anything from you.”
Mimi held on to his hand tightly. There were a thousand and one thoughts swimming in her head.
“The Fire Boys are really important to you, aren’t they? Whatever is important to you, I will treasure them as well,” she said.
“Sato is really important to you too, isn’t he?”
Mimi was stunned, “Where did that come from?”
“I saw the magazine article you both did for Front. Actually, I am kinda jealous of him.”
She couldn’t believe her ears. Mimi scratched her head and asked, “You’re jealous of Sato? Why?”
“Because he is able to give you something I can’t.”
“And what is that?”
“He is able to fulfill your dreams. I mean, I always knew that you were talented but that song he composed, ‘Farewell’, I have never heard you sound so amazing before. His skills are able to bring you to the next level.”
“I think you give him too much credit. Everyone thinks so highly of him. No wonder his ego is bigger than this island,” she said, shrugging her shoulders.
The both of them walked towards the Odaiba Marine Park. There was a view of the beach, the Rainbow Bridge and a replica of the Statue of Liberty. They both picked a quiet spot and sat down on the bench. Mimi was rather amused by the pseudo statue and was reminded of something. “Yuki, didn’t you go to America? How was it?” Yuki had taken off his mask. He looked at the statue wistfully. “It was for a screen test. I may be filming a dance movie there if I pass the audition.”
“That’s awesome. You love dancing, don’t you.”
“Yeah.”
Mimi thought that he didn’t look particularly happy about it. She wondered why she felt guilty for having him by her side now. She was happy to have him beside her but then she could not shake off the feeling that she will lose him one day.
She turned towards the distance, looking at the replica of the Statue of Liberty. “Yuki, if there ever comes a day when I become more important than your dream, then that is the day we should part.”
“Mimi...”
Her mobile phone suddenly rang. It was her manager whom she had abandoned back at Shibuya. An angry voice shouted at the other end. “If you hadn’t answered this call, I would have called the police! Where are you?”
Yuki’s cell phone also started ringing and it was Jun at the other end. “Yuki, you do know that there is a group meeting at Fame Factory tonight, right? Where are you?”
After getting off the phone with their respective managers, Yuki said apologetically, “I need to go. I’ll give you a lift back.”
“No, it’s alright, I’ll take a cab back. You need to get back to the agency.”
Mimi could see him hesitating. “It’s okay, you go first, I’ll stay here for a while before leaving. It’s so beautiful here,” she said, giving him a reassuring smile.
He placed his arms around her, holding her tightly. “I’ll call you later.” Mimi hugged his back and shut her eyes. She really didn’t want him to go.
“Ok,” she said. He released his grasp and put on his mask again and walked off.
Mimi let out a soft sigh.
Just when I was getting used to not having you beside me, you had to appear and turn my world upside down again.
Track #16
The model, Rika, contacted Mimi a few days later, asking when she would be free to have a meal together. It was a chilly winter morning, and the trees had long shed their brown leaves and now stood on the pavement, bare. Rika had arranged to meet her at a café around Ebisu at nine. That morning, Mimi found Rika waiting outside the café, wearing a white knitted hat, a black blazer and ugg boots. Even when she wasn’t wearing heels, she still towered over everybody. Mimi thought she looked even prettier than how she remembered her. Mimi herself was clad in a black leather jacket and a dark pink shirt dress and shin-high black boots. The model waved enthusiastically once she caught sight of her, “Nice to see you again!”
They entered the café and took their seats. “The breakfast set here is really delicious,” said Rika, as a waiter came by to take their order.
“Really? I will have one then. Two breakfast sets, please,” she told the waiter. Mimi looked at Rika and asked, “Do you come here often?”
“Sometimes. I live around here. I come by whenever I can wake up in the mornings, which is not very often. Work has been busy.”
“That’s good, isn’t it?
” Mimi commented. Breakfast consisted of a plate of bacon and eggs and a bread basket of croissants. The blonde girl looked at Mimi intently, “Actually, I am very interested in becoming your friend. I remember the time when you talked about ‘strong emotions’. To tell you the truth, I am thinking of quitting modelling and just be an artist or something, in Paris.”
“Why do you want to quit?” Mimi asked, biting off a bit of croissant.
“It’s because I’ve had too many unhappy memories here in Tokyo. I feel like taking a break from everything and just running away from it all. But I really like your songs; somehow they give me strength.”
“Thank you. But still, running away may not be the answer. I mean, unless you really want to be an artist, that would be a different story then.”
Rika sighed as she started cutting up pieces of bacon and said, “I don’t know if you know them, but there is this pop group called the Fire Boys.” Mimi choked on a piece of bread and started coughing rather violently, but Rika didn’t seem to notice and continued talking, “I used to go out with one of them. Well, for boy bands, they are not allowed to get involved in serious relationships. So he dumped me after he found me cheating on him. But that’s not the end of it. I got so mad, that I sent pictures of the two of us to the CEO. Things got really messy. Their CEO is a really powerful man in Tokyo, I got fired from my modelling agency and had to move to a smaller one.”
Mimi picked up her glass and took a sip of water. “But why did you two-time him?”
“It wasn’t serious cheating, I just hung out with this other male model who had been asking me out. I didn’t even sleep with him or anything,” Rika started waving her hands around, “I mean, my ex was always busy with his work schedule and he was never around. The cheating was just an excuse for him to dump me. To him, I was just a road block to his career. Maybe I was just jealous of him. I was jealous that he had something more precious than me. But that’s just how it is, you can’t expect a star to stay by your side forever.” Rika seemed to be talking to herself now. She looked on forlornly at the breakfast in front of her and started to cry. Mimi quickly handed her a tissue.
Mimi felt sorry for the blonde girl sitting in front of her. She didn’t even need to ask, but she knew Rika was talking about Yuki. She wondered if one day, her fate would be the same as hers. Perhaps one day when she can no longer hold on to a star, she will lose him the same way Rika lost him. She reached out and placed her hand over Rika’s.
“For what it’s worth, I think you are a great model. You looked so beautiful in the music video. It was an honour to have you in it.”
Despite her tears, Rika managed a small smile and said, “Thank you.”
That afternoon, Mimi had to troop down to Niji Building for another day’s work. A hundred and one thoughts were dancing around in her mind but at least, she had her music, she told herself. She greeted her band as she entered the rehearsal room, telling herself that she had to focus on her music. Kamaki, her keyboardist, was excitedly showing her photographs of his new baby girl when her manager suddenly barged into the room, holding a bunch of papers.
“Mimi!” he shouted, waving the papers wildly. “Mimi, your new single is officially a hit! It debuted at number eight! We got the confirmation from the Oricon Charts!”
“Really? That’s great! Everyone did a great job!” she said, clapping her hands. Kenta continued to bounce around the room. “You know what this means? You’ll perform at Music Stage next week! Your first television performance! I’m so proud! Drinks are on me tonight, let’s all go and celebrate! What date is it? I need to jot it down.”
Kamaki replied, “It’s the fifteenth of December.”
Kenta suddenly stopped bouncing around. “Ah, no wonder Sato wasn’t in his office.”
Mimi asked, “Why? Where is he?”
Her manager rubbed his chin thoughtfully, “It’s the death anniversary of his best friend. It should be 15 years since he passed away. He must be at the cemetery. I’ll tell him the news when he returns.”
He must have gone to visit Daichi, thought Mimi.
*
A bitter gust of wind blew among the graves at the cemetery. Wearing a long black trench coat and sunglasses, Sato placed a bouquet of white lilies on Daichi’s grave. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and said sadly, “I can’t believe it has been 15 years since you left this world. I’m so sorry.”
“You know it wasn’t your fault,” a male voice said from behind. Sato turned back to see Hiroki standing there with his own bouquet of lilies. About 17 years ago, Daichi, Sato and Hiroki were a trainee group under Fame Factory. They spent long hours training together at the dance studios, practising their singing and rapping, sharing the same dream of debuting as a pop group eventually.
After what happened to Daichi, Sato left the company. He couldn’t stand being in the Fame Factory headquarters without his best friend around but Hiroki stayed on and debuted as the successful pop duo, Hiroki & Haru. He was also given plenty of hosting and acting opportunities, such as the main host of Music Stage.
Hiroki placed a bouquet of lilies on Daichi’s grave and said, “Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if Daichi was still alive. He would be the same age as us, maybe he would have gotten married by now and you’ll probably still be in Fame Factory, not a rock producer. I see you’re doing well though.”
“There’s no point thinking about ‘what ifs’ now.”
“You were always so cold. The girls at the cabaret club were complaining to me that you never look for them anymore. Are you seeing someone now?”
“You are so annoying,” said Sato, placing a cigarette in his mouth and lighting it. He turned away from Hiroki and started walking. Hiroki ran and tried to catch up with him but Sato continued walking briskly, avoiding him. The singer pressed on, “You found her, didn’t you? The girl who can fully understand your music, the one who can make your music come alive.”
Sato stopped in his steps. He was getting extremely irritated with the other man and glared at Hiroki who looked triumphant at finally getting his attention. Hiroki said, “I haven’t seen you so interested in anyone before. Are you sure you are not interested in her romantically?”
“You never change, always so meddlesome. You should take care of your own life,” he said, blowing cigarette smoke at Hiroki’s face.
“She’ll be on Music Stage next week. So I can see for myself why you like her so much.”
Sato furrowed his brows and resumed walking towards his car.
“Sato, I’m just worried about you.”
“Why?” he snapped back.
“Because I’m your friend.”
“I have no friends. The only person I believe in is myself,” he said, throwing the cigarette stub on the ground. Sato got into his black convertible and sped off.
*
“Kenta, I need to leave! I left my cell phone at Niji!” Mimi was yelling at her manager who was sitting next to her at a noisy pub around Niji Building. Kenta, who was already a little tipsy after a few glasses of sake bomb (a concoction which Mimi learned was a mix of sake and beer), just giggled and waved his hand at her. “Bye guys!” she told the rest of the drinking party, which included her band and some other Niji staff.
As Mimi walked towards the rehearsal studio, she heard the soft tinkling of the keyboard. Wait a minute, she thought, listening carefully to the music. She last saw Kamaki at the pub with a very red face, so it couldn’t be him playing. But then, the style of playing was different. She slowly peeped inside the room and saw Sato playing a piece, seemingly engrossed. She continued looking at him from the doorway. She really loved the way he played the keyboard. It was like watching a great artist painting a masterpiece. Even though they passed by each other frequently in Niji Building, Mimi felt as if she had not seen him for a long time and though she would never admit it out loud, she missed him.
Sato felt someone watching him and stopped playing. He glanced at the doorway.
&
nbsp; “Mimi, what are you doing here?”
“I forgot my cell phone,” she replied, spotting her pink cell phone on the floor at the corner of the studio. She walked over to pick it up.
“Yuki called,” Sato said.
“What?” Mimi cried, feeling frazzled. She quickly checked her phone.
“I’m bluffing,” said Sato. Mimi gave him a dirty look.
“How are things with him?” he asked airily.
“I’m too busy conquering the Oricon charts to think about anybody,” said Mimi, crossing her arms.
“You’re lying,” he said. Mimi sighed and sat on the floor of the rehearsal studio. She might as well tell him; there was no one else that would understand better. “Actually we sort of got back together recently.”
“Hmm...”