I collapse onto the floor, my body wracked with sobs, my breath coming out in short gasps. The pain’s too much. He’s my everything. The pain is just too damn much though. I need to leave. I need to go back. Screw leaving tomorrow, I’m done.
“Don’t cry Cinders.” Brady wipes a way my tears, his own eyes full to bursting. “I’m so so fucking sorry my dark haired beauty.”
“Why?” I bawl. “What did I do so wrong?”
“Nothing, you never did fucking anything. I hated it there Cinders. Man, you think I would take a job with that dickhead Bob if I didn’t. I couldn’t handle college. I couldn’t handle fucking anything. I was homesick and I was stressed and tired. You’ve got to know I regretted it as soon as you left. Hell I regretted it as soon as I fucking said it, as soon as I agreed to it. I didn’t know how to go back on it though. I was gonna come to LA and beg for you back but you’d moved-”
“I lost the apartment Brady.” I say, looking into his panic stricken eyes. “I couldn’t afford it now that you weren’t there. I had to move in with Vanessa the Satanist. I sleep on a foldout couch and my closet doubles as a storage cupboard. You didn’t just leave college behind. You left me.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I thought we were gonna get married. I thought we were gonna be one of those couples that fall in love young and stay that way. Why did you leave me? Were you just sick of me? Was I clingy or obsessive or something? I wanna fix this Brady, I want us to be ok. I don’t wanna go back and be miserable but,” I sigh.
“You don’t trust me.” Brady finishes.
Do I trust Brady? Do I believe he’s dependable? Do I think he can give me everything I need? I realize now that I was worrying over the wrong thing. I shouldn’t have been concerned with what Brady’s reaction would be. I should have been concerned with myself because now I have the past six months staring me in the face and screaming in my ears, it doesn’t seem as easy to get over as I thought.
Chapter 20
Brady
She doesn’t trust me. She doesn’t trust me. She doesn’t trust me.
Her sweet voice is echoing in my head, stamping on my fucking heart. The only thing worse than hearing those words coming outta her mouth is the look on her face right now. She looks so fucking broken, like the whole worlds on her shoulders. Did I do this? Did I break her?
“Cinders.”
She pinches her eyes shut and her head droops down. For the first time since she came rolling back into town, I just don’t know how to fix this shit with my dark haired beauty.
I can’t kidnap her. Us being stuck in the bathroom while Hurricane dipshit blows all over the place out there kinda makes that a moot point anyway. I can’t force her to love me. I can’t force her to forgive me. I can’t do shit. I couldn’t do it six months ago when I took the pussy way out and hightailed it back to Franklin and I can’t do it now. She deserves better.
“I thought I could do this. I thought we could move on but-”
“Don’t say it!” I snap, not even fucking willing to let her finish that sentence. “Please don’t say it.”
“Why wasn’t I enough, Brady? Why couldn’t you stay for me?”
She thinks that she wasn’t enough but she couldn’t be more wrong.
I take a deep breath and resist the urge to cry like a damn girl at the way this conversations going. And to think an hour ago I was getting my jollies off and ready to howl at the moon with how much of a fucking man I am making my girl scream. Damn, talk about the world being out to get ya.
“You remember our first week as freshman’s, we met all of our professors, made a few friends and you said that college was the next step for us.” I start ready to get it all out. “You said that we were finally growing up and that you couldn’t have done it without me.” I grab her hands to stop them fidgeting and squeeze them, closing my eyes at the feel of her skin against mine, at the fucked up tingly feeling going through my body. “I hated it. I didn’t want new friends. I didn’t wanna to grow up. I didn’t wanna take the next step. I wanted to go back home and hang out with Noah and Tucker. I wanted to be a kid still without worrying about bills and getting up in the morning to get to class. I didn’t wanna have to study and shit for a fucking degree I’m never gonna use. And it never got better. The feeling never got any fucking better. I thought I’d get used to it and I’d start to like it but every time we came home for Thanksgiving or Summer or for just a visit, it’d kill me to leave again.”
“Why did you stay for as long as you did then? I mean, you stayed for like a year and a half.” Her dark eyes are shiny with tears and it guts me.
“You. I wanted all that stuff but I wanted you more. When we came back for Christmas break Bob took me to the side, said that he’d noticed I wasn’t doing too good at school. He offered a job, a chance to move up in his shitty company and make something of myself. I took it. I didn’t think, I didn’t care, I just took it. You left and I hated that more. College didn’t seem so bad compared to being here and you not. Your Mom kept me updated. She’d never tell me where you lived because she thought it’d be more of a betrayal or some shit but she’d tell me how you were doing.” Her hand moves out of mine and my stomach drops. After telling her this, it’s still not enough. She covers mine instead though, gripping it tight ly and so I carry on. “Every holiday, every break, I waited for you to come back so I could beg you to forgive my dumb ass but you never did until a few weeks ago.” I shrug. “I wanna tell you to move on a nd find someone who isn’t a complete dick. I wanna tell you to do whatever makes you happy. You’re my other half though. I was fucking made for you. I don’t want you to move on. I want you to be with me, whether it’s in LA or Franklin or fucking Mars. But Cinders don’t ever think you weren’t enough because you will always be enough.”
“Wow.” She bites that thick bottom lip before shyly smiling. “Why couldn’t you say that to me before?”
“I don’t know if you heard but I’m kinda an asshole.”
“No,” She rubs one of her warm hands against the two-day stubble on my cheek. “You’re my Brady.”
“Please don’t leave me. I know I messed up. I know I got cold feet or whatever that shit was but it’s over. I know what it’s like to be without you and I’m not fucking doing it again. Please I’ll do anything.”
“Brady, I love-” She jumps when something roars just outside the bathroom door. Not a lion kinda roar, more a 747 parking in my living room type of roar.
“The fuck?!” It’s too loud and way too fucking near to be thunder. Oh shit, oh fuck.
As much as I’d love for my Cinders to finish that sentence, it’s time for me to be a man. This storm isn’t calming down, only getting worse and the more clangs and crashes I hear the more I’m getting freaked the fuck out. I pull away and lift myself up. Brian scampers his way over to Cindy and curls in her lap. Poor little guys scared outta his mind.
“Brady, what are you doing?” Cinders pulls onto my arm and looks at me with eyes full of fear. Fuck that shit, nothing gets away with making my woman scared.
“I’m gonna stick my head out, see what’s going on. It’s probably nothing.” There’s a shake in my voice that I’m trying hard as hell to hide. I wince on hearing the howls of the wind. Whatever’s going on just outside the door doesn’t sound too good. “You got your phone?”
“Um no I didn’t pick it up.”
I clench my eyes shut. Fuck, we’re stuck in a bathroom with no phone. The only light in here is from the wall light above the sink and that’s only because it’s battery operated. Eventually that’s gonna run out. Shit, why the hell didn’t I pick up my phone?
I wince on hearing another crash. It’s too loud to be outside. I can’t even imagine what the fucks making that noise cause it’s like about a hundred different ones all piled together.
“I gotta go out there.” I stare at the door, the noise becoming louder and louder.
“What? Are you kidding me? What
are you talking about?” She looks horrified and if I’m honest I don’t blame her. I don’t like the thought of going out there either. I can’t stay here though. This might be Franklin and we might not get a lot of storms here but I’ve been through enough that I know this isn’t just any old storm.
I’ve also watched enough shitty disaster movies to know that when a storm ’ s going on, sitting in a house that’s covered in windows and is about a resilient as a fucking teepee isn’t a good idea.
“I need to grab us a phone. I don’t know if we’ll get signal but that noise is way too damn near for me to be comfortable.”
“Ok it’s official, you’ve lost your mind.” Cinders throws her dainty hands up in the air as if I’m infuriating. She’s not far wrong but this isn’t some false alarm, this is real fucking life.
“Cinders, this house isn’t strong. We’re surrounded by fucking trees and whatever the fuck else. It’s getting battered out there so I’m betting the rest of the town is too. We need to be able to get in contact with someone if we need help.”
“We won’t need help! You can’t go out there!”
“I’ll be five minutes. That’s all. You’ve got to stay the fuck in here though, ok?”
“Brady-” She goes to stand up and I step away.
“Five minutes. I don’t care what you hear, you stay where you are. Hold onto Brian.”
“Brady!” I quickly grab onto the door handle and swing it open. I can feel droplet of rain on my face and adrenaline surges through me. I slam the door shut just as I hear Cindy scream “BRADY!”
Wind whips in my face and the rain ’ s hitting me full pelt. That’s not good. That’s not good at fucking all.
The windows are smashed, a branch half in half out. Glass and water, twigs and leaves cover the floor. I’m getting showered in here. Literally . The panes are broken in the windows . The sky’s pitch black and a streak of lightning spreads across it, crackling.
The garden ’ s totaled. I’m talking no plants, no furniture and the lawns turned to sludge. Man, my Moms gonna be pissed. Every cloud has a silver lining I suppose.
I stay close to the wall and head towards the living room. I watched the movie Twister so I like to think I’m an expert in this shit. Everything looks normal in the hallway apart from the rain blowing in my face. That expensive as fuck vase Bob got given by some hotshot senator stands on the hallway table, covered in water droplets.
“Oops.” I topple it over with a finger. “Damn wind.”
I wonder if I could shred his suit ’ s and blame it on the wind. Nah that’s too much of a chick move.
I come to the open doorway of the living room. Every window ’ s smashed, the oak frames snapped. Through what used to be the window I can see my truck, parked diagonally which is definitely not how I parked my baby.
“Shit.”
The windscreens gone, the bonnet dented, by what I don’t know but the point is that my poor trucks been injured.
“Fucking global warming.”
Great and now I’m talking to myself. As if I haven’t got enough fucking problems right now.
Taking a deep breath, I leg it through the doorway towards the couch. Cindy’s bra’s hanging from the shade on the lamp. At least I hope it’s my Cinders cause if it not hers then it’s… I shudder. Ok now I wanna bleach my fucking brain. Repeatedly.
I pull the clothes that are scattered around the room aside. Damn you’d think I was looking for a needle in a haystack. Seriously, how fucking hard is it to find a little plastic block that lights up. Thunder roars in the sky and the room lights up.
“Bingo.” I swipe my cellphone up from under the coffee table with one hand and snatch the pile of clothes up with the other.
“Brady!”
“Cindy, you in there?!”
“HELLO? ANYONE THERE?!”
I frown at the voices. Maybe I’m dead or some shit. They sound just like…
“There you are man.” A flashlight shines in my face and I squint before I’m fucking blinded. I laugh when an ugly ass face pops up in the broken window. “Thought you’d gone all Dorothy on our asses for a minute there.”
“Noah man, you have no idea how good it is to see you. What the fuck are you doing here dude?”
“One sec. TUCKER! LUKE! FOUND HIM!”
“Deafen me why don’t ya.” I laugh and stick a finger in my ear.
“As much as I’m loving the jokes right now bro, we’ve got to get outta here. Tornado alerts right across the state. I don’t know if we’re gonna get one but I don’t think your house is gonna win against one regardless. We need to leave now.”
I can hear the sound of pounding feet and Tuck rushes past, quickly followed by Luke. The dumbasses spin round fast and come back. They’re soaked to the bone. Tucker’s Bieber hair is officially ruined. Well whaddya know, yet another silver lining.
“Where’s Cindy?” Luke asks, practically screaming in my face.
“The bathroom, she’s in the bathroom with Brian.”
“My Dad just called,” He holds up a walkie talkie. “Apparently a tornado just touched down thirty miles from here.”
Fuck! Tornadoes, storms, flooding. This shit doesn’t happen in Frank l in. Here the most exciting things that happen is Mr. Carmich a el forgetting where he parked his car or the mailman having to get stitches in his butt cause a dog went loco. Never again will I complain that this town is boring. Never a-fucking-gain.
Luke’s words sink in further. Thirty miles. Shit, thirty miles ain’t far. It’s like a fucking marathon and people run that shit.
“Shit, Cinders!” I turn on my heel and run through the lounge, dodging the furniture which i s t ruined from the rain.
Shit, before I know it I’m heading down, slipping on the floor. I push out to catch myself and regret it straight away when a pain that’s feels like a hundred little hammers are whacking the shit outta my hand shoots up my arm.
“Oh shit, oh fuck. Screw you!” I scream at the floor.
“Brady will you calm the fuck down?” I hear Noah behind me but ignore his ass. Doesn’t he realize my Cinders is in the bathroom and it’s about to go all Sharknado in this shit? Hasn’t he watched Sharknado?
“Tornadoes Noah! Twisty, windy fucking things that blow cows away and shit. Here!”
“Ok the codes ain’t helping, will you slow down? Is your hand ok?”
“No I’m pretty sure it’s broke.” I let go of my arm and throw my weight into the door to the bathroom. I can hear the wood splintering as I tumble through. Now I can add broken shoulder to my list of fuck ups for the day.
“Brady the door wasn’t locked!” Cindy shouts, clutching Brian close to her. Even he’s looking at me like I’m a god damn idiot.
“No time.” I gasp.
“Have you lost your ever-loving fucking mind.” Noah roars, stepping in.
Cindy’s pulling the hem of her tank top down, trying to cover the satin panties she’s got on. Hell, I don’t want douchebag Noah seeing my woman’s bit’s and shit. I’ll stab his fucking eyes out with a fork.
“Yo turn around man. Cinders cover… up.” Jesus Christ I need to catch my breath. I just pulled some ninja shit out there.
“Um, with what exactly?”
“Here.” I yank the waistband of my shorts down.
“Wow, dude I don’t wanna see your ass. Cover that up man.” If I see a tornado I’m chucking Noah in, it’s official.
“I thought I told you to turn the fuck around.”
“You really need to chill out. Here Cindy.” He says, pulling his wet black jacket off and passing it to her. I snatch it out his hands, scowling at the smartass and pass it along.
A pink blush spreads across her face as she puts it on. Thankfully it hit’s her mid-thigh. Still a lot of skin showing but at least my woman’s not gonna be heading out into the element s with her ass on display out .
“Come on, let’s get going. Tuckers trucks outside.” Noah commands, putting on that di
ckish cop voice I usually hate. Right now it’s grounding me and keeping from spazzing the fuck out.
Ok maybe he’s right and I do need to calm down. All I can think about is keeping my woman safe. I’d die if anything happened to her. She’s my life. I got so much I need to tell her. I got so much I want to show her.
I pull myself together cause I’m the man in this equation. I gotta keep it going cause if I fall apart then it’s only douchebag Noah left to protect her. I couldn’t give two fucks if they gave him a badge, he couldn’t protect shit.
I entwine my hand with Cindy’s and shoot her a smile. If we can make it out of this without being blown to Oz, I swear to fucking God I’ll have a ring on her finger by the end of Summer.
***
“I think it looks good.” Noah nods. He’s such a dick. He’s the world’s number one dick.
“Very pretty.” Actually scratch that shit. Tucker is the world’s number one dick with Noah coming in close second.
“When I have full use of my hands, I’m taking you motherfuckers down.” I point with my one good hand, keeping the one with the bright pink Hello Kitty cast on my lap.
Yeah seems not only are Noah and Tuck annoying, stupid and complete assholes. They’re also comedians. I’m not laughing.
“Now princess, don’t get yourself in a state. Then you’ll be the guy in a H h ello K k itty cast throwing a tantrum. Don’t be that guy.”
“And you Tuck, are the guy with gonorrhea.”
“Hey.” He points at me while Noah’s cracking up next to him. “I told you that in confidence, man. Anyway it was negative. Tucker Jameson is clean as a fucking whistle.”
“Gonorrhea, really dude?” Noah smirks.
“Hey the test was all clear, P p eter P p an.”
“Brady!”
“Why the fucks everyone picking on the injured guy? Have some compassion.” No sympathy from these dudes. Where the hell has Cindy gone? She’s a way better looking companion and a lot more caring.
“WHERE'S MY BABY?!” I shudder at the screeching voice.
Forever Together (Forever Love #2) Page 27