Wasn’t it about time for him to learn to yield graciously? Lilly’s time and effort with the ancient ceremony had rubbed off on him, making him think about the future.
Lilly cleared her throat, placed her hands on her thighs and finally broke the solitude. “I want to explain something.” Her voice sounded thin and wavering. She sat on her heels moving her hands to rest in her lap. She paused and seemed to struggle for composure, fighting back emotion.
He wanted to reach out for her, yet he knew she had something important to say and didn’t want to interfere or ruin anything.
“In my family, honor means everything. I had a lot of making up to do just by being born a girl as far as my father was concerned. He taught me the consequences of dishonoring the family name, browbeat it into me, and now that I’m independent of him, I still give him power over my life.
“My sobo showed me that being true to myself was honorable. She gave me the courage to claim journalism as my major, no matter how upset my father was about it. But I never completely broke free of my father’s hold. And I’ve made bad choices because of that.
“Whether I think of his form of honor or my grandmother’s, I see now that I dishonored you with my duplicity. I wanted that big story. I wanted to make a name for myself, no matter what the cost. And I tricked myself into believing I was just doing my job, that it was expected of me. Now I’ve lost you and your trust in me and the cost is greater than I can bear. I want more than anything to earn it back.”
She reached for his hands, grasped them and squeezed.
“Gunnar, what I’ve learned these past several weeks from knowing you, and how you’ve risen above your father’s example, is I can do that, too. You’ve shown me that it isn’t about being in the spotlight, it’s about doing what’s right.
“Please forgive me, Gunnar. I will change. I am changing just from knowing you and being here in Heartlandia.”
He couldn’t keep quiet another second.
“Lilly. Sweetheart.” He tightened his grip of her hands. “I’m a hard-nosed SOB sometimes because of my father, and I’ve been thinking I’ve been way too hard on you. I can’t dictate what you should or shouldn’t report. It wasn’t convenient for me if you broke the story, and I was being selfish. I threw around the word trust like a pompous jerk, expecting you to do all the changing. The thing is, I can’t be in control of everything, and I don’t want to control you. Will you forgive me?”
“Forgive you? Of course I will. I love you, Gunnar,” she said with a quivering voice. “I love you so much I don’t know how I’d breathe without you.”
The words burst into his chest and scattered, forcing his heart open to the root. She loved him, too.
Lilly rose up on her knees, let go of his hands and reached across to hold his face. Her hands trembled as she drew him near and gently kissed him. This one special kiss, knowing she loved him, bonded them like nothing else could. Talk about giving someone a second chance, and by Buddha, this time he’d handle things completely different. He’d learn from his mistakes and do everything right…the way she deserved.
“I’ve made some mistakes,” she said, “but I want to make things right with you.”
Her soft, warm lips were eager to take his again. So hungry for her, he was more than willing to oblige. He wrapped his arm around her and drew her close. A flame of passion sparked in every part of his body. She’d taken a huge risk by going first. It seemed only fair to tell her his plans, too.
Breathless, he broke away just long enough to get the words out. “Sweetheart, I’ve loved you since the day at the hospital when you came to see me even though I’d just broken up with you. I couldn’t have been happier to see you.” He covered her mouth and kissed her lightly.
This time Lilly broke away. “You love me, too?”
He nodded, smiled. “Oh, yeah.” Then he moved to kiss her again.
Lilly pulled back from his embrace and looked directly into his stare. She must have felt his ragged breath against her cheek, saw the raw desire in his eyes since he reeled with longing.
He lifted her hand to his mouth, kissed the palm and squeezed her fingers tightly trying to harness his hunger. He continued to breathe heavily, yet he never wavered from her stare.
“Let me make love to you,” she said. “Trust me.”
He swallowed, using every last ounce of power to resist her. “I do.” He kissed her quickly again, then looked around the room hoping to find the right words to express these overwhelming feelings.
Lilly backed away and stood quiet, biting her lower lip, seeming to hold back what she wanted to say. He stepped closer and tenderly cupped her face with his good hand. He traced his fingertips across her cheek and ran his thumb along her lower lip then down to her chin, cherishing each centimeter. His gaze followed the path, and he’d never seen a finer face. He’d never felt someone else’s pain as easily, or shared in the simple joy they’d found together. He’d never loved anyone like this. “If we’re getting back together, I want to make sure we do everything right, but with my bum shoulder it will be tough to make love the way I want.”
“Let me take care of everything,” she said.
What was she suggesting? “I can’t exactly lay back and let you do all the work.”
“Do you trust me?”
Ah, gee, she’d used the trust card, and wasn’t that what all of this was about—regaining his trust? He couldn’t exactly put his foot down and be his usual overbearing self. Hell, he’d just promised to change, too. He wanted to be with her more than ever, but one handed lovemaking…damn. She was waiting for his answer, and he’d probably made her think he had to think about whether he trusted her or not, which wasn’t the case at all.
“Of course I trust you,” he blurted without further thought. For the first time in his life he was thinking about spending the rest of his life with one special person. Wasn’t it about time, like he’d thought just a few moments ago, that he learned to compromise…to bend? And most important, learned true grace.
Lilly didn’t say another word. Neither did he. She took his one good hand and led him into the bedroom.
Chapter Fifteen
Lilly had thought up a part to the tea ceremony her grandmother would probably never imagine. She brought Gunnar into her bedroom, the bedspread already folded back, fresh silk sheets scented with roses, and felt his hand tighten in hers—a promise of things to come. Sandalwood-candle aroma filled the room as she’d lit the multiple votives just before she’d served tea. Out with the old. In with the new.
Gunnar stopped her, turned her toward him and kissed her again, his lips firm and hungry, melting through her like one of those candles.
She unbuttoned his shirt and tenderly pulled apart the Velcro sling, loving the sight of his chest and muscles, aching over the bandaged wound on the left shoulder.
She could tell he fought showing the pain that the simple act of lowering his arm brought on, so after removing the shirt, she quickly reapplied the black sling, leaving him otherwise topless. She kissed his right shoulder and the opposite side of the broken clavicle, then the notch at the base of his throat before walking him backward toward her waiting bed. She’d clicked the remote on the dining table and started the Koto music again, its strange ancient plucking sound being somehow perfect for the moment. Using one finger to push his chest, she forced him to sit on the edge of the bed then removed the tabi she’d given him earlier for his feet. Next came his jeans. Without being asked, he stood to help her out with a wink, a very cooperative partner.
Down came the jeans, then his briefs, fully exposing him, proving he was already coming to life. “What about you?” he asked.
She resorted to the gesture she’d used several times already this afternoon, placing one finger to her lips, looking deep into his eyes.
She gestured for him to lie down, and he did, smack in the center of her bed, curiously watching her every move. She walked to the right side of the bed and removed her z
oris and tabis. Next she tended to the sash from her kimono, unwinding it over and over until the satin belt hung free, loosening the kimono in the process. She took his right hand, kissed the palm then put a slipknot around his wrist and before he realized what she’d done, tied his one good arm to the bedpost.
He looked amused, not the least bit concerned.
With a demure smile she slid the kimono over her shoulders revealing she’d been completely naked beneath for the entire tea ceremony.
Seeing the desire flaming in his stare, her breasts tightened. She got on the bed and sat primly on her heels as she had throughout the ceremony, exploring the skin on his torso, thighs and chest. He hissed in breath after breath as her explorations deepened, while adding kisses and nips wherever she pleased.
Gritting his teeth throughout, over the next several minutes Gunnar let her do any-and everything she wanted to him, showing complete trust.
He was already fully aroused and tall and she took her time, enjoying the feel of him, the smooth, the rough, the slick. One firm squeeze sent him sucking in more air, and even deeper breaths when she first kissed, then filled her mouth with him.
He moaned and squirmed on the mattress. “I can’t take much more of this.”
Hearing his plea, she sheathed and straddled him. Even though both were at the height of excitement already, they took their time, her hips gently rolling over him, rising and falling in sweet counter rhythm. It seemed every nerve ending inside worked overtime forwarding thrilling messages to all points north and south, all the way down to her toes and to the top of her head. He dug his heels into the mattress, pumped up the pace, and finding her special spot, she moaned. Then he homed in on it, sending hot jets through her center up and over her hips and back, growing the intensity to nearly unbearable, and soon giving her release.
Her fingers dug into his chest; senses completely overloaded she gasped, and he joined her as they tumbled together in what seemed like slow motion over the brink of paradise.
She collapsed on top of his taut, warm body and for several moments she basked in the afterglow of his love, gathering her breath, feeling her pulse return to normal.
“Are you going to keep me tied up like this or let me hold you now?”
She pecked his lips with a flighty kiss then undid the sash. One strong arm gathered her close making her feel secure and loved. Both exhausted, they cuddled in the bed surrounded by candlelight at dusk.
*
Gunnar needed to tell Lilly a few things. They’d forged into a completely new phase of their relationship this afternoon thanks to her taking the risk. Now it was his turn to take a risk and prove beyond all doubt that he trusted her. With everything.
He cleared his throat. “The reason I got so mad at you running the article on Mayor Rask was because you were getting too close to our secret.”
Lilly’s head bopped up faster than a jack-in-the-box. “Your secret?”
“Heartlandia’s secret. At least that’s what we’ve been trying to do with the information, keep it a secret. Until we’re ready to tell the whole town everything we’ve found out, that is.”
“Are you sure you want me to know this?”
“More than I’ve ever been in my life.” He refused to throw in the term “off the record.”
She gave a tender smile, almost solemn, indicating the significance of what he was about to do. “You’re talking about the committee?”
“Yes.” He nodded.
“The one I’ve been spying on.”
“So you finally admit you’ve been spying on me.” He softened the tease with a quick smile.
Totally focused on the carrot he dangled before her, she obviously chose to ignore his little dig. “The meetings at city hall?”
“Correct.” He took Lilly’s face in his hand and looked her square in the eyes. “Only because I trust you with everything I have, I’m going to tell you what’s going on.” Then he kissed her forehead, but not before noticing her eyes dancing with candlelight and wonder.
Was he making a mistake? If he loved her and she loved him, he couldn’t be.
After shifting his position in bed, moving up so his head and shoulders rested on the headboard, he proceeded to tell her the whole story. How Leif Andersen had discovered the trunk filled with a sea captain’s journals, small treasures, nautical artifacts, guides, charts, compass and chronometer when breaking ground for the city college. How his sister, Elke, had pored over the journals deciphering the notations, and discovering that Captain Nathaniel Prince, also known as The Prince of Doom, was a pirate who’d stolen men from up and down the Oregon coast, forcing them to work on his ships, until he crashed off the shore of what was to become Heartlandia and settled in. How he had continued his unscrupulous practices from this very spot until the night the Scandinavian fisherman teamed up with the Chinook and overtook their suppressors. They’d pieced together the rest of the information and figured out he was murdered by one of his own men shortly thereafter.
Gunnar explained the unfortunate timing of their mayor dying and Gerda Rask stepping in as mayor pro tem without knowing any of this, only then to be hit with the outlandish news. How the committee had been formed to figure out what they’d discovered in the trunk, and what to do about the information they’d unearthed. How at first they’d thought the whole incident amusing, something to add to the Maritime Museum to draw more visitors. Then how they realized this was a huge part of their history that had been suppressed and left out of the schoolbooks and needed to be addressed.
He watched Lilly, who sat rapt listening to his tale, hoping beyond hope she wouldn’t pounce on the story of her lifetime before the time was right.
“To make matters worse, Captain Prince had hinted at buried treasure, and unfortunately, his handmade map and legend points to a spot located in our sacred Chinook burial ground. That’s our current problem, and that was the picture you stumbled onto at my house. The infrared thermography shows what might be the trunk smack in the middle of those grounds.”
Lilly rolled onto her back holding her head as if it would explode if she let go. “This is crazy!”
“Tell me about it.”
“No wonder you didn’t want me snooping around.”
“In a twisted kind of way you’ve forced our hand, made us think about bringing this information out in the open. Letting our citizens help decide what to do next.”
“It only seems fair.” She’d come up on her elbow and pinned him with an earnest gaze. “But then, I’m an outsider, what do I know?”
“You’re not an outsider anymore. You’ve become one of us.”
“Then I say, tell the people. See how they feel.”
“It does blow our perfect little history right out of the Columbia River, you know?”
She chewed her lower lip and nodded, eyes intense. “But it’s the right thing to do, and you always do the right thing.”
He put his hand on her forearm and squeezed. “And that’s why we need to find the best time to announce the news and have our plans firmly in place for handling the results before we do.” He made his pitch to Lilly for holding back on releasing the information. The rest was up to her.
“When’s that?”
“We don’t know yet.”
“Wow, so that arsonist wasn’t crazy after all, just criminal.”
“Yup. And turns out the fun ‘urban legends’ that have always floated around, the ones we’ve used to amuse our tourists, have always been based in truth.”
She sat up and stared at him. “Talk about a major cover-up.”
“A centuries-old cover-up.”
She bobbed her head in agreement. “And ancient revenge.” Referring back to the recent fires.
He got lost in her brown depths, wondering what was going on in her mind. He also couldn’t help but notice her ears were bright red, which usually meant she was excited or thinking extra hard.
His throat tightened. He loved Lilly, and because of it, he c
ouldn’t dictate what he thought she should do, he could only suggest. “That’s why I’d like to ask you to write the story…but not until we’re ready to tell the town.”
“Really?”
“I know you’ll be careful, sensitive to detail. Tell it the way it needs to be told.”
“You trust me to be the town mouthpiece?”
“With all my heart, but the story isn’t quite ready to be heard yet.”
“I get it.” She took his hand. “It’s not always about my timeline. In this case, I understand how important it is to wait until your committee is ready to come out with it.”
Trusting her with everything, Gunnar reached out. “Come here, Chitcha.”
She obliged, snuggling close to his chest, kissing him sweetly.
Lilly respected the rock and a hard place the committee had been put in. He knew it down to his bones. If she sat on the story for just a while longer, respecting the mayor’s wishes, being sensitive to telling the details at the right time, she’d have the major story of her lifetime and he’d have one last and very important question to ask her. And it had something to do with spending the rest of their lives together.
*
She’d spent the afternoon impressing upon him that she was worthy of his trust. Through her tea ceremony they’d wiped the slate clean. Right now, all he wanted was to get lost in Lilly’s love again, to show her how he felt about her, and forget anything and everything that had to do with the town secret.
She must have read his mind, because her expression changed. Those brown depths only focused on him. He couldn’t be one-hundred-percent sure if it was him or the story that had suddenly turned her on again, making her ears light up and all, but right this moment with her kissing him crazy, he really didn’t care.
*
Her Perfect Proposal Page 18