by D. K. Combs
The conversation had turned into one she hadn’t anticipated. Not only did he have a deeper side to him that she’d thought, but she had revealed things about herself that she never should have. He wasn’t supposed to know that “Alice’s” family had died in a fire. He wasn’t supposed to know that she had gone to the fairs. He wasn’t supposed to know anything about her except the fake name she had given him…and yet, there was something about him that made it easy for her to talk to him.
Blaine.
It was all Blaine, she thought, digging her nails into her palm as sudden anger surged through her. Blaine was the reason she felt so alone, so depraved of human contact. Blaine was the reason that Saeran felt comfortable talking to the one man she shouldn’t be. Blaine was the reason she was here now, watching the strongest, fiercest man she knew bare his soul.
For that alone, she wanted to hate her sister.
“Lass,” Kane said, drawing her attention. His back was to hers, tense and forbidding. She unclenched her hands, fighting for composure. He couldn’t see her, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t as attuned to her as she was to him.
“Aye, my lord.”
“Kane,” he corrected her, looking at her over his shoulder. “When does yer stay here end?”
She paused.
“I…I am not entirely sure.” Yes she was. So long as Blaine and Kane married, she would be here for as long as they permitted her presence. Blaine had said she would reveal who Saeran really was after the marriage, but she doubted that would happen now. The more her sister demanded, the more she began to realize that Blaine was…selfish. Selfish and greedy. If she could bribe Saeran to serve her with the truth of her identity for all of her eternity, Blaine would.
Saeran still loved her sister, but she was incredibly angry with her. No longer would she idly sit by as she controlled everyone around her unjustly. Nor would she let Blaine control Saeran. No more. It ended today.
“Where are ye’ staying? What wing?”
She went pale.
“It does not matter, does it?” she asked, fighting for composure in earnest. Saeran felt her hands begin to sweat. She slept in the East wing, where both Blaine, Saeran’s, and Kane’s rooms were. It was the family wing, whereas the other wings were meant for servants or simply empty.
“O’ course it does,” he growled, turning around. Thick arms crossed over an even thicker chest. Lord, but he was large. Her mouth somehow managed to water with desire and dry with fear at the same time. How did that even happen? she thought dazedly.
Kane. Kane did that to her.
“My lord—“
His low growl of disapproval shushed her.
“I never see ye’ during the day.”
She smiled uneasily. “You’ve only known me for a night. You must not have noticed me—“
“No,” he said bluntly, giving her a hard stare. “Ye’ve been here for a full moon, and I only saw ye’ last night and today. What do ye’ even do during the day?”
She stared at him. Oh, why did he have to be so nosy? Actually, no. Why had she been so foolish as to go into the kitchens not dressed as a boy! If she had taken that precaution, like she should have, she would not be in this position. She would be in her room, safe and sound, without this man nitpicking at every detail the fake woman that was Alice had.
“I am feeling…quite tired,” she said weakly. It was not feigned. The toll of her fears, of his pestering, was making her dizzy. He could never find out who she was, not truly. She could handle Alice, but she could not handle Saeran and Alice. The two halves of her were to stay forever apart, for both Kane and Saeran’s better good.
Almost instantly, his eyes changed. Softening around the edges, the hard lines of his face no longer appeared terrifyingly tense—he was concerned. Before she could make an excuse to leave, he came forward, taking her in his arms.
His body was hot. Overwhelming. The confidence she had felt with him earlier fled, replaced by a sense of shy security. She felt safe in his arms, but she could not be as forward as she had been. Trembling hands cautiously landed on his chest.
“Yer secretive, nymph.”
“Nay, I—“ He cut off her denial with a kiss to her temple. She quieted, cheeks heating.
“Aye, ye’ are. One second, ye’ll tell me about yer family, then the next, yer retreating into a defense position, avoiding my questions. It makes me curious, but I will no’ push you.”
She lifted her eyes to his. They were soft, but determined. He will not push her, but that will not deter him from learning all he could about her. She saw the knowledge in his eyes as clearly as the sun shone during the day. She shivered—not from fear, but anticipation. A game, she thought. He was thinking of this as a game.
She would not lose.
“I do not understand what you mean,” she said lightly. She did, though, and to quickly change the subject, she asked, “I heard that you are once again going to war.”
He sighed.
“Back to that, are we?”
“It’s a colossal matter, Kane!” she said, offended by the exasperation in his voice. “Whenever you go to war, men die.”
“My men donna.”
“But they do—“
“No. They donna. The weak bastards we fight against do.”
She pulled out of his arms, putting her hands on her hips. “Either way, men die. People die. The war takes a toll on your own clan—“
“No it doesna.”
“Kane!”
“Alice!” he said in a falsetto, rolling his eyes at her. “Yer lack of faith in me is quite offensive. My men donna die, my clan doesna feel the toll of war, and yer best to mind yer own business.”
She stared at him.
He stared right back.
Then he smiled. It was a terrible smile, one that she knew he gave just to rile her. Still, the sight of it sent butterflies fluttering in her stomach.
“If ye’ must know, my men and I are leaving within the sennight.”
“What?”
He burst into laughter. “Donna fash yerself, lass. Ye’ll be safe and sound here. Although,” he said with a sigh. “I do have a new lad to look after. You know him—he’s the one who found ye’. Saeran Sinclair.”
“He what.”
That’s all she could manage. Her thoughts were going wild, panic was beginning to build, and confusion was right on her heels. Saeran. Herself. War. Within a week. A battle—that she would be going to. What.
She couldn’t ride a horse properly, let alone wield a sword! What was he thinking, taking her out to battle? Hadn’t be withdrawn her from the training? Shouldn’t that mean she should stay behind, at the castle?
“My lord—“
“Kane.”
“Kane, I…Do not you think Saeran is too…I don’t know how to put this. Feminine? He’s small, not…”
“Not what?” He frowned at her.
“…large.”
“Saeran canna help that he is a late bloomer. I was once a small lad like him,” he said, scowling at her. “It wasna until I was seven and ten until I started to grow. Donna doubt the lad’s strength even though he is small. If he heard ye’…Lass, I donna want to hear negative things like that in my keep.”
Even though he was defending her other identity, she blushed.
“I was just pointing it out… Wasn’t he taken out of training?”
“Aye, but what does that have to does with anything?”
“Kane. He obviously won’t be prepared—“
“In the heat of battle, I am sure he will rise to the occasion. That’s what it took for myself. Saeran is very similar to myself as a lad,” he said, almost proudly. Her heart softened, even though she disagreed with him completely.
She had always thought he hated her. Every time she was forced to be in his presence, he would either ignore her or snap at her. Rarely would he praise her, as he was doing now. That just showed the kind of man he was.
He would not admit to fee
ling soft towards anyone, but he did. He was not as hateful as she had assumed. Aye, he was rough around the edges, and strict and insistent, with determination that should terrify her, but he was not a bad man as The Lion was reputed to be.
“Why are ye’ looking at me like that, lass?”
She blinked. “Pardon?”
A slow smile came over his face.
“Are ye’ worried about me now?” I’m worried about that look on your face! she thought. Instead of saying that, she backed away. He was slowly coming forward, his body moving as gracefully as she’d ever seen it, muscles rippling in the dim light of the room. How could she speak, when her mouth was so dry someone could have fed her cinnamon?
The only thing she could manage was a choked gasp when his body pressed against the length of hers.
“Donna worry, lass. I’ll come back for ye’.”
The words were spoken in a near growl, sending a shiver down her back, washing away the fear of what was to come. He wouldn’t have to come back for her, since she would be there the whole time, but she did not say that.
His head lowered. Her breath left her mouth on a gasp. He took advantage of it, taking her lips with his own, masterfully clearing away any and all thoughts on everything except for the hands that were now on her waist, the hardness that was pressing into her hip, and the feel of his hot, dominant mouth against her own.
THT | 23
Saeran knew that Blaine knew about the battle. It was all she talked about, to anyone but Saeran. Lately, she’d been avoiding Saeran, and she honestly couldn’t blame her sister. Saeran’s outbursts and complete disregard for her sister’s “problems” were causing a rift between them.
In the last week Saeran was there, it became worse.
She had her fair share of it, but she couldn’t help it. Being with Kane gave her hope—hope for the future. That maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t have to hide from him. That she could show him who she really was. Alice was only a name. Everything else he knew about her was true.
They were…perfect together. Aye, perfect. Even though she had only spent time with her father, the only other male she had known, she felt like she connected with Kane on a level that she could never achieve with another man. He was hard, yet soft. He was strength, yet warmth. He was smart, yet witty. He was all she could think about now—him, and how they could possibly have a future together. Connor might have been correct on his assumption that he would accept her. The only thing that held her back from exposing herself was the fear of the unknown, and…Blaine.
Saeran couldn’t stand the sight of her sister. Thinking of Kane proposing to her, taking Blaine into his arms and kissing her with the passion he gave her, created a sensation in her heart that robbed her of breath. She should be happy that Blaine was closer to achieving her goal, but Saeran couldn’t make herself be happy for them. If anything, she wanted to keep the two of them a part.
It didn’t even bother her anymore. Before, the thought of angering her sister into silence was terrifying. Now, Saeran was actually relieved. Her sister’s unreasonable attitude made it easier for her to see Kane, though with him preparing for battle, and her working herself into a fit to organize the accounts before they left, they hadn’t seen much of each other.
For that, she was both grateful and upset. She missed him. Aye, she was able to see him as Saeran the boy, but it was pure business. He didn’t take her into his arms, didn’t hold her or kiss her. He didn’t even know who she was! The good thing about this, however, was being able to learn more about him.
He was a completely different man around Saeran and her counterpart, Alice. She had expected it to be a drastic, terrible change. It was anything but. With both personalities, he was kind, considerate, and he had a good sense of humor. Though he was strict with Saeran, he made up for it with the tenderness he treated Alice with.
After their steamy kiss in his study, they had only seen each other twice that week. Her body craved him more than before every time she saw him, and she knew it would only become worse in the coming weeks.
Saeran set down the sealed parchment and stood, stretching her arms. She had been sitting in the same chair for the past two hours and she was sure it was dark outside. Her whole day, spent correcting the accounts. Luckily, they were done, and she could finally relax. The only thing she had to worry about when she returned was training the beast with Brodrick and cleaning the stables. The accounts were in order and could practically take care of themselves with the help of her writing what was needed.
Happy and feeling like the world had been lifted from her shoulders, she practically ran to the door. She could hear the ruckus in the hall and knew it was time to sup. Finally, she could have a real meal with a moment to herself.
At least, she thought that until a stick-like figure ran into her while she was coming around the corner. She cursed before she could stop herself.
“Why are you running in my halls?” Blaine snapped, grabbing Saeran by the wrist when she would have fallen into the ground. Saeran could have gaped at her from the shock of her sister’s help, but then Blaine shoved her away, sending Saeran into the wall.
She could barely keep her temper to herself.
“The cook has set the table, has she not?” Saeran asked, failing at hiding the bitterness. She pushed past Blaine, angry. These were not her halls—they were Kane’s. He had yet to propose to the woman who she used to adore.
“I am getting tired of your attitude,” her sister snapped from behind her. “It is like all of your responsibilities are getting to your head, sister.”
Saeran froze. Her hands clenched at her sides. Of course her sister would pick now to confront her on something that was not even her fault. Blaine had been the one to cause this. If not for coercing Saeran into pretending to be a boy, she would not have all the time she had with Kane and all of the responsibilities that came with managing the accounts. All the years she had insulted Saeran, making her think it was for the good of her health and beauty, came back to her.
“Are you so important that you cannot speak to me anymore? What, do you think that because you were assigned to do my duties, that you’re better than me?” She laughed.
Saeran stared at the wall, fighting. Fighting so hard not to turn around and show her sister how much she had learned in the dusty training area. She couldn’t stop the flow of anger and betrayal—frustration—that flowed through her. Even when Saeran had made it a point to avoid her sister, Blaine found something to complain about.
“What are you talking about,” she asked, clenching her teeth. Saeran had done nothing but dirty work. Cleaning the stalls and training an insane horse that was bent on killing her was not part of “Blaine’s duties”. Lord, the only duty she had was walking around and looking pretty, and she couldn’t even do that properly.
The pinch of guilt she should have felt at her thoughts were absent. She wasn’t even concerned at the lack of their presence.
“The accounts. Spending all your time with that beast of a man. Who do you think you are?” A hand grabbed her by the elbow, jerking her around. Saeran yanked herself away from her sister’s hard grip and ground her teeth.
“Do you even know how to do the accounts, Blaine?” She met her sister’s eyes for the first time since being stopped. What she saw there made it all the more impossible not to do something she wouldn’t regret later.
Jealousy. Fury. Greed. It was all there, and for the first time since Saeran and Blaine had reached their womanhood, she saw it for what it was. There was not a single ounce of love in her sister’s face—and there never had been. The realization was not shocking, but it was painful.
The look Blaine was giving her now was everything she had seen in her eyes since the day their parents had died. Her sister had stopped loving her somewhere along the line, and Saeran was no longer fooled.
She bit back the hurt at the realization.
“I do not have to know yet! The fact of the matter is, you are try
ing to take my place and I do not appreciate it.”
Lord, Blaine sounded ridiculous. Saeran smiled a little. It was more sarcastic than adoring, and her sister took note of it. Blaine watched her narrowly.
“I fail to see how I am ‘taking your place’ when I am a boy in the man’s eyes. And he is not a beast,” she hissed. He was the exact opposite, and the fact that Blaine refused to understand that infuriated Saeran. Kane was good. He was rough, but good.
More than good.
Amazing. Stunning. His strength, both mental and physical…entrancing.
“I should be the one doing the accounts and spending time with him. The whole of this week, it seems the two of you are sneaking off! He is my husband, Saeran. Not yours,” she hissed. Her scrawny hands clenched at her sides, and she looked about ready to strike Saeran.
She wanted to be hit. She wanted to be hit so hard that Blaine drew blood, so that she could return the strike tenfold.
“He is not your husband.” He had yet to propose, and she hoped it stayed that way. The more she thought about the two of them, the angrier she became. It had been a constant threat the whole entire week. To think of them together…as man and wife…when Kane and Saeran created fire with their passion…it was inconceivable. Her chest tightened.
Suspicion glistened in her sister’s eyes.
“Jealous? Saeran, are you jealous?” Sick pleasure gleamed in her eyes. It was so shocking that she couldn’t respond. Her sister wanted her to feel like this. Choked up, sick to her stomach. She was baiting Saeran for it. Then the suspicion worsened into pure fury. “He knows who you are. He knows that you’re a woman, doesn’t he?”
Saeran hated herself for it, but she smiled. Not wide enough to be a yes, and not small enough to be a no. Just enough to make her sister think.
“We spend so much time together…”
“You whore.” Blaine reached out. Her hand moved fast enough that Saeran almost didn’t stop it in time, but she did. She caught her sister’s hand in a tight grip. The urge to twist was so strong that it took all of her willpower to simply shove her sister aside.