by Maggie Cox
‘I can understand that.’ Moving in closer, Conall reached out to touch her hair.
Jerking back in surprise, Morgen wiped her palms down her skirt, then nervously tucked her blue silk blouse more securely into her waistband to cover her confusion.
‘I was just about to come in and make you some coffee. I didn’t get a chance earlier, when Richard Akers was with you.’
‘Well thank God he’s gone now.’ Conall winced. ‘That man could bore for England.’
Morgen tried to smile, but somehow her facial muscles wouldn’t work. He overwhelmed her, that was the trouble—scattered her thoughts with just a glance. But she could hardly afford to have her wits scattered when he’d clearly demonstrated by leaving early on Sunday morning that she had just been a diversion for him…nothing more. Long years without knowing a man’s touch had left her vulnerable to the first man she’d really been attracted to since Simon, and now she had to pay the price. If only he wouldn’t stand there looking at her, with that sexy little smile of his playing havoc with her senses and driving her heart wild.
‘Don’t I warrant even the smallest kiss hello?’ Unabashed, Conall closed the gap between them to slide his hands up her arms. Trembling with nerves, Morgen stole an anxious glance at the door.
‘No. You don’t. I got the message loud and clear on Sunday, when I woke up and found you gone, that what we had was just sex…a one-night stand. But don’t worry, Conall, I’m not going to make things difficult for you. Some of us know how to act with a little dignity.’
‘I know how it looked.’ Flushing beneath his tan, he ruefully shook his head. ‘But I had a lot of thinking to do about you and me.’
‘And what brilliant conclusion did you come to?’ She couldn’t help it if her voice was scathing. His actions had made her feel cheap…used and cheap. Even if the sex had been great.
‘I decided I want a chance at a proper relationship with you. That includes getting to know Neesha. I tried to ring you Sunday night and explain but you were out.’
‘I had a headache. I unplugged the phone.’ There was no thaw in the chilly tone of her voice.
Conall’s steady blue gaze didn’t waver. ‘So? What do you think about what I just said?’
‘What do I think?’ Morgen pulled away from him, crossing her arms angrily across her chest. ‘I think you’re spinning me some kind of line, Conall. Do you know how cruel that is? You can sneer all you like at people like Derek, who care too much, but at least I don’t think he’d ever consciously use anyone.’
‘I didn’t use you!’
‘No?’ She tilted her head to one side and her glance was bitter. ‘Then what do you call having sex with a woman and leaving her the next morning without so much as saying goodbye?’
At the realisation that things weren’t going entirely the way he’d planned, Conall raked his fingers frustratedly through his hair. ‘I’ve never had to pursue a woman in my life,’ he admitted, gravel-voiced. ‘The fact that I’ve done all the chasing now must surely tell you that it means something more than just sex? What other man would pursue you to a children’s play park, for God’s sake? I’m serious about us, Morgen. I want us to have a proper relationship. Why won’t you believe me?’
‘Because I don’t trust you.’ There. She’d said it. Funny how it didn’t make her feel any better.
To give Conall his due, he did look crushed. So he was a good actor…a past master, no doubt, at manipulating women to get his own way. It wouldn’t be hard, a man who looked as good as he did.
Suddenly Morgen felt very tired of all these games.
‘I’ve got work to do.’ She glanced edgily towards the door again, anxious to bring this awkwardness between them to an end, her heart thumping at the idea that their relationship was a ‘no-go’ after all. Something told her she wasn’t going to get over the crushing disappointment that easily.
‘So you’re not going to give me a chance to put things right?’
‘There’s nothing to put right. We’re both adults. I knew what I was doing as much as you. Forget about it. I know I will.’
‘Liar.’
She found herself suddenly hauled hard up against his chest, and Morgen’s senses were all at once consumed by him. Her mouth parted in a little inrush of breath as she saw the blue irises turn almost black, and felt his hands tighten commandingly on her waist. Where he’d all but crushed her against him her nipples ached, and tightened unbearably, already anticipating his caress, helplessly remembering his mouth on them, the heat, the longing, the way he’d made her feel…
‘Do really think you can forget about me so easily?’
Lowering his head, Conall dropped a combustible little kiss at the juncture between her neck and her collarbone. The sizzling fall-out burned her all the way down to her toes and back again, and Morgen had to clamp her teeth down hard on her lip to stifle her groan.
‘You’re a ruthless man, Conall. Right up until now I never knew how ruthless.’ Wrenching herself free from his embrace, she bumped into the desk and, flustered, picked up some papers on the pretext of studying them.
‘Because I go after what I want?’ he demanded, scowling.
Morgen felt the little prickle of perspiration on her brow and sucked in a deep breath. ‘Because you don’t care who you hurt in the process,’ she said softly.
She was wrong, Conall thought bitterly. He was more than aware of the fact that he had hurt her with his apparently casual behaviour on Sunday, and desperately wanted to make amends. If he could turn back the clock and undo his leaving he would do it like a shot. He didn’t want to lose this woman. He knew it would be his own fault if he did.
Blue eyes narrowing in concern, he straightened the cuffs on his shirt and blew out a breath. ‘I don’t want to hurt you, Morgen. If I acted like a jerk on Sunday it was because up until now I’ve not been entirely easy with the idea of commitment. But I don’t want to let this chance with you slip away. What do you say we give things another go? Take it one day at a time, huh?’
He knew by her expression she was wrestling with the idea. Holding onto his breath, he was on tenterhooks as he waited for her answer.
‘You weren’t just using me?’
His heart thudded almost to a stop. ‘I swear.’
‘Don’t think that I’m unaware of your reputation.’
His dark brows came together at that. ‘Oh? And what reputation would that be?’
Uneasy at this new turn in the conversation, Morgen glanced nervously towards the door again. ‘Look, Conall, I know you don’t go in for long-standing relationships, and I’m not blaming you. I never expected… I mean, don’t think that I’m going to make things awkward or difficult for you. What happened, happened. Perhaps it’s for the best if we just put it behind us and be adult about this.’
His blue eyes turned wintry. ‘I thought you didn’t pay attention to gossip? You’ve obviously heard things that make you doubt my intentions, and you don’t believe I can possibly be serious about us.’
‘Right now it’s hard to know what to believe.’
Again, Conall found he was cursing himself for walking out on her. Now he had his work cut out convincing her he wasn’t the amoral bastard she obviously thought him to be.
‘You’re right. We need to talk properly. Now’s not the time or place, but we need to do it soon. Can you get your mother to sit with Neesha tonight?’
Her smooth brow puckering, Morgen thought quickly. ‘Probably. Yes…yes, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind. But why?’
‘I’m going to take you out to dinner so we can talk like civilised adults, away from the office and away from the gossips. I’ll pick you up about seven-thirty. That okay with you?’
Morgen nodded, her head in a whirl. ‘Fine.’
‘Good. In the meantime I’d be grateful if you could make some coffee…oh, and if you could get those notes transcribed from the board meeting last week and let me have a look at them, that would be good too.’
At seven forty-five that evening, dressed in her one and only ‘little black dress,’ her make-up applied as perfectly as she could manage it, Morgen sat on her couch sipping anxiously at the small glass of dry white wine she’d poured herself. Okay, so he was late…it didn’t mean he wasn’t coming, did it?
The last thing he’d said to her before she’d left for the night was that he was going to drop in at the Docklands site for a brief meeting with the contractor before making his way home. He’d booked a table at some fancy restaurant in Chelsea for eight o’clock and had made her promise to be ready on time.
‘Well, I’m ready, Mr O’Brien,’ she said out loud into the silence. ‘Where are you?’
When eight o’clock came and went, with still no sign of Conall, Morgen went resignedly into the kitchen and threw the remains of her half-drunk glass of wine into the sink. There was an awful ache in her heart, and her thoughts were tumbling over one another to be heard. Why hadn’t he kept their date? Had he had second thoughts after what she had said this morning? Had he too come to the conclusion that a relationship between them was not such a great idea after all?
The pain of rejection hit her like a fist in her stomach. Hunching over the sink, she stared unseeingly into the enamel basin, fighting to keep the sting of tears at bay, vowing to stay strong even though her heart was breaking. All she could do was thank God things hadn’t got too serious—at least Neesha hadn’t grown to care for Conall and he wasn’t yet a part of her life, as he might have been had things between him and Morgen progressed. More’s the pity…
Finally, resigning herself to the inevitable, she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, switched off the light, then got her jacket and car keys and drove to her mother’s to fetch her daughter.
Arriving early the next morning, she was relieved to find no sign of Conall. Telling herself she was grateful for the breathing space, Morgen tried to distract her racing thoughts with work. She switched on her computer, logged on to the programme she used for minutes of meetings, then endeavoured to concentrate on the notes she’d transcribed yesterday but hadn’t had the chance to type out.
Yesterday had turned into one of those days when things got steadily busier as the day wore on, and she hadn’t been able to get the promised notes to Conall as he’d requested. Thinking about that, she fell into anxious speculation about the man himself. Where was he, and why hadn’t he turned up for their date last night? He hadn’t even had the decency to ring her and cancel. He’d let her down for the second time. She wouldn’t give him another chance.
Chewing heavily down on her lip, Morgen read the typed sentence on the monitor at least three times more without making the least bit of sense of it. Was this a foretaste of things to come? Was she destined to spend her future working days with this man feeling like some lovesick schoolgirl? Thrown into confusion when he was around, her stomach churning like crazy when he wasn’t?
‘Hi, Morgen.’
She glanced up as Julie hurried into the room, frowning when she saw her fellow PA looking flustered.
‘What’s up?’
‘You haven’t heard?’
‘Heard what?’
‘About what happened to Conall?’
Morgen’s stomach lurched wildly. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘Last night at the Docklands site. He slipped on some scaffolding and fell. He spent the night in hospital with a cracked rib and a bad gash on his shoulder that needed twenty stitches.’
‘Where is he now?’ Pushing to her feet, Morgen stared anxiously at the blonde girl. Why hadn’t someone informed her? But then, why should they? As far as everyone else knew she was only his temporary secretary. And to think she’d spent the whole of last night silently castigating him for not turning up for their date, when all the time he’d been lying injured in the hospital. Her stomach rolled over at the thought. She couldn’t bear the idea of that strong, fit man in pain and alone in hospital.
Glancing curiously at Morgen, Julie flipped open the pad she was carrying and tore out a page. ‘He’s gone back home to his sister’s flat in Highgate. He rang me on my mobile this morning and asked me to tell you to go over there. Here’s the address. He’s got some instructions for you.’ She handed Morgen the torn-out page, and her blue eyes widened a little when the other woman all but snatched it out of her hand.
‘Thanks, Julie. Can you take my messages? I’ll phone you just as soon as I’m on my way back.’
Grabbing her coat and bag, Morgen hurried to the door.
‘Give him our love.’ Grinning sheepishly, Julie came up beside Morgen. ‘Tell him all the girls in the office are wishing him better.’
‘Sure.’
Not sure at all that she would tell him any such thing, Morgen hurried down the corridor to the lift.
He opened the door to her dressed in jeans and a light blue shirt opened halfway down, exposing the white bandaging across his chest. There were bruising shadows beneath his compelling blue eyes and his hair looked as if it hadn’t seen a comb for days. But to Morgen’s starved gaze he was everything she’d ever wanted in a man and more.
Striving to keep her voice natural, she endeavoured to smile. ‘So this is what you get up to when I leave you alone? Being an architect these days is obviously a far riskier business than I imagined it was. I’ll bet you didn’t have the proper footwear on. Is that why you slipped? Last time we were there the place was a quagmire.’
She knew she was babbling, but it was so good to see him up and about when she’d dreaded seeing him in a far worse scenario. Right now she was operating on pure adrenaline alone. He could have been killed, for goodness’ sake!
‘I’m sorry about missing our date. I didn’t have your phone number on me, or I would have got someone at the hospital to ring you.’ Unusually subdued, Conall stepped back to let her enter.
His sister’s flat clearly had all the comforts of home, with its beautiful parquet flooring, sumptuous furniture and up-to-the-minute entertainment console, but the thought of Conall lying on that big luxurious sofa alone and in pain brought all Morgen’s maternal instincts rushing to the fore.
‘It doesn’t matter. What matters now is that you look after yourself. Are you in pain? Did they give you something to relieve it when you got home?’ She was already taking off her coat, throwing it over a chair, then turning to examine Conall more closely, her heart skipping a beat when he glanced back at her and smiled.
When Conall’s gaze fell on the woman he’d been thinking about all night, the dull throbbing pain in his ribs that had robbed him of even one hour’s decent rest since it happened miraculously faded as if he’d been given a wonder drug. With her long dark hair flowing loosely over her shoulders, and her green eyes wide with concern, he thought she was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on. He didn’t need hospitals or painkilling drugs—all he needed was Morgen. Just being in the same room with her made everything right.
Suddenly all the loose ends in his life seemed to slot into place and find a home. The thought was exhilarating, yet terrifying. When he’d walked out on her on Sunday morning and then faced her in the office yesterday, he really thought he’d blown it. And however ready she was to forgive him now, for not showing up last night to take her to dinner because he’d had an accident, he still had his doubts about her being equally magnanimous about his earlier transgression.
‘I’m doing all right, all things considered. Do you think you could make me some coffee? The kitchen’s just through there.’
‘Have you eaten? I could make you some breakfast too. Why don’t you go back to the sofa and lie down?’
‘I don’t want to lie down. I want to talk to you. I’ll come in the kitchen while you make the coffee.’
Morgen found him a chair, insisting he sit while sh
e busied herself organising coffee and toast. Every now and then she glanced anxiously at the big man cautiously holding his ribs, and her stomach would lurch in fright. Popping some bread into the toaster, she turned and leant against the counter to speak to him directly.
‘So how did it happen?’
‘Exactly as you said.’ Shrugging his massive shoulders like a naughty schoolboy, he grimaced. ‘Wrong shoes, muddy surface—then I follow the contractor up some scaffolding and lose my footing. Lucky for me I was only a few feet off the ground. If I’d been up any higher it might have been curtains.’
‘That’s not funny.’
‘No, it isn’t.’ Wincing, Conall tried to make light of the fact his ribs felt as if they’d been snapped in two and tied back together again with string.
‘You should never take chances like that. Where was your mind?’ Realising she was scolding him because she was angry he’d been so obviously careless with his own safety, Morgen turned back to the toaster and checked the bread.
From behind, Conall said quietly, ‘I was thinking about you, Morgen. I’m beginning to think you’ve put some kind of spell on me.’
She moved across to the fridge, found the butter she’d been looking for and brought it back to the counter. Standing on tiptoe to reach up to a high shelf for a mug, she pretended to make light of his statement.
‘Don’t be silly!’
‘Dammit, woman! I’m being serious!’
Her heart pounding, Morgen swung round at the reprimand. She didn’t miss the wince of pain that flashed in his electric blue eyes and she was stricken with remorse.
‘Please, Conall, don’t get yourself all worked up. I can see that you’re hurting.’
He swore softly. ‘I’m hurting more because you don’t seem to be taking me seriously. Just because your husband played around with your feelings doesn’t mean I will do the same. I mean what I say, Morgen. I want a relationship with you…a serious relationship.’