by Alexis James
“You never lost me. I’ve always only ever been yours.”
Our lips drift together, sealing the words with a silent vow. And as quickly as the frayed nerves and anxiety fades, the need to be with him as only we can surges to the surface. Our tongues drift together as he tightens his hold on me and deepens the kiss, his hands sliding down to grip my ass. It would be so easy to take this where we both want it to go, but the chime of Grandpa Tito’s antique cuckoo clock is a stark reminder that this is neither the time nor the place for a proper reunion.
“Please tell me you have a hotel room,” I whisper, sliding my hands through his hair and pressing my body up against his.
He chuckles. “I do. There’s even a king-sized bed.” Leaning down into my ear, he whispers, “Not that we’ve ever needed a bed. If I recall, a couch or a table works just fine.”
My face burns hot, and I bury it in his neck. “I recall that as well.” Footsteps echo from down the hall, indicating the return of my parents. “Hold that thought.”
“Oh, I plan to.”
By the time they enter the room, we’re no longer plastered up against one another but rather standing innocently holding hands. My dad shuffles into the living room, not giving us another thought as only men can, and Mom steps in our direction with a broad smile. “Sorry to intrude, but we need to get to the hospital.”
“No intrusion at all,” Cruz replies.
She gives me a curious look then directs her question to the handsome man at my side. “Will you be coming with us?”
He nods. “I’d like that. I’m anxious to meet Mia’s grandfather.”
“I’m staying with Cruz at the hotel,” I blurt out, happiness and excitement pushing forward. I notice how he awkwardly looks down at his feet, like he’s afraid to face the wrath of my mom. “Tonight, I mean.”
Mom snickers, taking in all in stride. “I assumed as much.” Reaching out, she takes Cruz’s hand in hers, and I’d laugh at the shocked look on his face if I wasn’t so enamored with him in every single way. “So you love my girl, do you?”
There’s not the slightest hesitation in his response. “Yes, ma’am. Body and soul.”
Okay … so I’m now a puddle of mush and tingling in all sorts of places that are inappropriate when standing in front of one’s mother. I’m also fairly certain that my heart might just up and explode with happiness.
She smiles at him. “Well, that makes me very happy, considering that I know she feels exactly the same way.”
Shit-eating grin in place, he gives my hand a squeeze and looks at me with a silent promise of what’s to come. Sure, we might still have issues to deal with and challenges to face, but this does feel like one large step toward a happily ever after.
“Te amo, belleza.”
Smiling up at him, I whisper, “Te amo.”
Voices fill the house, mingled with the sound of familiar Spanish guitar and the mouthwatering smells of some of my favorite dishes. Looking around, I hardly recognize the once empty space I used to reside. Now it’s filled with all the warmth I was searching for but didn’t realize I was missing, the sense of home I haven’t had in years, since long ago when I was a child and lived with my parents. Mia’s influence is on every surface, from the new overstuffed couch she insisted we have in order to ‘properly’ watch her favorite movies to the numerous throw rugs that line the floor. Grant holds court in the corner by the window, looming tall and proud as he soaks up the sun, and even though I still can’t bring myself to converse with him as Mia does, I do find myself giving him a token head nod now and then.
Mia’s holding tight to her grandfather, who begrudgingly came to the mainland to celebrate Christmas. He’s been with us for a week now and even though his recovery has been slow, he tries to keep up with whatever we’re doing. He’s spent time at the office learning about my company, gone a few rounds with me over a game of chess, and just this morning he and Mia did a few exercises in the room down the hall. I have no idea when he’s planning on returning to the island and at this point I couldn’t care less. He’s quickly become one of my favorite people, an ear to bend occasionally and the wise voice in my head when I know I’ve screwed up—which is often according to the beautiful, brown-eyed woman who I share my day-to-day life with.
She settles him on the couch with our fathers and makes her way toward me, bright smile perfectly in place. “You look content,” she comments, taking my hand in hers.
“I am, querida.” I glance around again, seeing all the happy faces throughout the vast space. “I never thought this would happen.”
“What do you mean?”
“This…” I gesture to the room “…you were here before. You saw how—”
She wrinkles her nose. “How cold it was?”
“Yes, how cold it was. Now just look around.” I see our mothers chatting happily together as they share the cooking duties, Roman and my sisters propped up at the bar laughing and carrying on, the elder men of the family in deep conversation. “Who would have ever thought my life could change in so many ways?”
Mia shrugs. “Well, you know what Deborah Kerr says?” She smirks, as if I’m going to be able to know specific lines from her favorite movie like she does.
Pulling her close I chuckle. “Really, babe? You’re going to quote An Affair to Remember when I’m waxing poetic?”
She laughs. “Of course I am, because the words are true. You can’t plan a life like ours.”
She’s right, of course. I could never have planned for something like this to happen. I was living my life, such as it was, trudging through each day with zero expectations, zero hope for a happy future. Then in walks Miss Mia Elliott and in a matter of months, I’m head over heels in love and my life has been turned upside-down.
This upside-down life is pretty damn perfect, if I do say so. Sure, we still have issues, but thankfully we’ve both learned to let the stupid stuff go and talk the big things out. We talk … a lot. We talk about Dani and Darren and the baby that never was. We talk about our childhoods and about our hopes for the future. We’ve even recently ventured into a few conversations about marriage and children, though Mia believes that’s a long way off. Me … not so much. And I’ve got the ring to prove it.
“Should we be concerned about that?” She points toward the window and beyond, where Marco and Amita are seated next to one another at the end of the dock, deep in conversation.
I shrug. “I doubt it. Marco is player, but he’s a good man and he’ll take care of her.”
She mock-glares at me. “She has a boyfriend, or have you forgotten?”
“I’m not the one who has forgotten. I’d say she has,” I reply.
Mia smacks my arm and narrows her eyes. “She’s a good person, Cruz. She’s just … having some difficulty with Vic, that’s all.”
Pressing my lips to her head, I state, “I get it, love. I just don’t want her messing with Marco’s head.”
“Neither do I.”
Part of what I adore most about Mia is the way she loves my family. She’s a staunch defender when needed, constantly the one person they will turn to for levelheaded advice. She and Sophia have become very close in the past few months and even though my baby sister is away at school, the two girls chat frequently. Her friendship with Marco is by far the closest. I still occasionally get jealous, but I know he loves her like he does our other sisters.
“How’s Tito doing?”
Her gaze drifts to her grandfather, who is chuckling over something Papa has said. “He’s doing really well. I’m so thankful he agreed to come here.” Leaning close, she whispers, “He won’t tell you, but he secretly loves being here with us.”
“He’s welcome to stay as long as he wants. You know that.” Who would have ever guessed that I’d not only be content to have Mia living with me, but her grandfather as well.
“He’s in no hurry to return to the island. He’s having too much fun with your family.”
“Our family,�
� I reply.
Her eyes glisten with happiness and her lips find mine in a soft, sweet kiss. “Our family.”
Spontaneity has never been my strong suit. I prefer things to be well-thought out and perfectly planned with all contingencies in place. But as my fingers toy with the ring in my pocket, I’m convinced today is the perfect day to officially bring our two lives together.
“Come with me, belleza,” I urge, pulling her along behind me until we’re standing in front of Grant. “Wait here.” I quickly make the rounds, urging all the family members to join us, excitement pooling in my belly. Marco and Amita stroll back inside the house, looking cozy with his hand resting on her lower back. He shoots me a knowing look and gives me a brotherly head nod of encouragement, our previous conversation something he obviously hasn’t forgotten. Ass that he is, instead of offering me wise words when I told him I wanted to marry Mia, he asked me what was taking me so long.
Resuming my place at Mia’s side, I gather her close and take a deep breath. “Mia and I wanted to thank you all for celebrating Christmas with us.” There’s a flurry of murmurs all around, and I quickly hold up my hand to silence them. “For those of you that don’t know, I’ve been a miserable ass most of my life.”
“Niño,” my mother warns.
“Sorry, Mama.” There are chuckles all around and once everyone settles, I begin again. “Anyway, as I was saying, I’ve been a miserable jerk most of my life.” Mama shoots me a smile. “I didn’t believe I deserved to find happiness or love. I didn’t believe any of that until this beautiful woman walked into my office one day and my world changed forever.” Glancing down, I find her grinning up me, the knowing look her in eye says she can tell exactly where this headed. “Mia has brought happiness into my otherwise dark and lonely life, and I will always be grateful she decided to take a chance on me.”
Turning to face her, I gather her hand in mine and drop to one knee. There are squeals behind me, my sisters most likely, and a token sob that undoubtedly is from one of the moms. Undaunted, Mia grins down at me like she’s known this was coming for weeks now.
“Querida, you once told me how blessed you were to have the time you did with your grandmother.” Tito and I share a knowing look and then my eyes are once more on Mia. “You also said that no one would be able to take that away from you.” Squeezing her hand, I beg silently for patience. “I’m so blessed to have you and I believe it’s important that I tell you that now, right here, in front of everyone. You make me a better man simply by being who you are.”
Extracting the ring from my pocket, our eyes meet, and in that moment there’s no fear, no hesitation, no doubts. This is everything I want, everything I need. This is my forever. “Mia Leilani Elliott, would you do me the great honor and agree to spend the rest of your life with me?”
She nods even before the words are all out. “Yes, you sweet, stubborn, beautiful man. I would be so blessed to be able to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Rising, I slide the three carat solitaire diamond on her left hand, grinning when I see the reaction on her face. “Come here,” I whisper, pulling her into my arms and holding her close.
There’s a flurry of excitement all around us, but all I see, all I feel, is the amazing woman I’m embracing—the woman who will soon become my wife and eventually the mother of my children.
Pulling back slightly, I cup her face in my hands and press my lips to hers. “Te amo.”
She sniffles and wipes at a stray tear. “I love you too. So very, very much.”
Embracing her again, I lift my eyes to the happy faces around us. These are the faces of our family, mine and hers, beautifully blended into one, just as we are. Our hearts are no longer fragile; they are now brimming with love and affection and hope. That doesn’t mean I won’t still mourn my first love and it doesn’t mean I won’t continue to miss her. It means simply that I have made peace with her loss and going on with my life will never diminish what she and had or the child we shared. After fifteen years of pain, I am finally able to tell her goodbye and to open my heart fully and completely to another.
“You okay?” Mia asks.
Smiling down at her, I reply, “I am. I’m more than okay. I am very, very happy.”
The End
Need more sexy Spaniard men in your life? Be on the lookout for Marco’s story, “Taming Marco”, and baby brother Roman’s story too, in “Breaking Roman”.
To get release dates on these and other books by Alexis James, sign-up for her newsletter.
A novel, like many things in life, is really a group effort. Sure, the writer puts the words onto the page, but those words don’t come alive without a lot of help. On that note, I’d first like to thank those who helped to bring Saving Cruz together.
Mom….how can I begin to thank you for the time and love you give to my work? You see my characters as I do; real people with real issues who we laugh with, root for, and cry over. You’ve read this book more than anyone and your diligent pre-editing is vital to my process. I could never thank you enough for all of your help, and for constantly telling me how amazing I am (because you’re not partial to me or anything). I love you and I’m so honored that you are in this with me, by my side, loving every minute of it as much or more than I do.
Deb….in your other life you’d be a hot-shot editor. In this life I’m proud to call you my cousin, my confidant, my friend. I’m honored that you took the time to give this book a once-over. I don’t take your advice lightly, and your constructive criticism is something I count on and cherish. Here’s to many more conversations about storylines and characters, while we share a good bottle of red wine. I love you!
I have the best…THE BEST….cheering section in the world, and truly there are too many people who support me to list them all by name, so I’ll simply say thank you. By far, my Dad is the head cheerleader; constantly telling me how proud he is, dreaming of trips he and I are going to take around the world for all my many book signings. Dad…even if I never have any book signings, I’ll happily travel the world with you anytime. I love you!
Speaking of the best….I have the best hubby any girl could ask for. Now I admit (as will he), that he’s never read one word of mine, but he supports me in this endeavor all the same. He listens patiently while I yammer on about the trials and tribulations of self-publishing, even though he’s fending off sleep while doing so. I know if I need his help, he’ll be there. Mark…here’s to 27 more amazing (and consecutive…wink, wink) years! I’m the luckiest girl in the world to call you mine, and I love you more each and every day.
While I’m tooting his horn, I will also thank those two amazing human beings that came along after I married him. Our two kiddos….what can I say? Being your mom is really the best thing I’ve ever done, second only to marrying your dad. T-you may be an old married man now, but you’re still a good enough guy to ask about my next book each and every time we talk. J-Thank you for being my daily sounding board and the level-headed one of the two of us. I love you both more than I can ever tell you! I am SO blessed to be your mom!
Dee…Thank you for talking me down off the ledge…more than a few times. Even in the midst of your busy Master’s program, you have still made time for me and my panic attacks. I miss you…and can’t wait to celebrate your accomplishment next year.
Randyn…Thank you for just being you; my friend, my “sister”. Thank you for listening to me go on and on about my books, and for simply showing concern for this crazy endeavor I’ve found myself a part of. We’ve been through a lot together, and I hope you know how much your friendship means to me.
Jessi…Your friendship has been a true gift. Your willingness to listen, to show support, and be there for me no matter what, is something I’ll cherish always. I’m so grateful for you!
This novel was my very first endeavor in real, true self-publishing. Without a doubt, I never could have learned the ins and outs of self-publishing were it not for the gracious assistance of other
authors out there. I’d particularly like to thank Jamie McGuire (author of the Beautiful series), who posted a long how-to on her Facebook page, laying out all the steps of good self-publishing; one baby step at a time. She may never know who I am, but I’m grateful she took the time to reach out to those of us just beginning this upward climb.
I would like to thank Kari Ayasha of Cover To Cover Designs, for creating a beautiful cover for my handsome Spaniard. Kari, you are a joy to work with and your enthusiasm is infectious. I look forward to not only finishing this 5-book series with you, but to continuing a long relationship together on many, many book covers. You’re brilliant kiddo and I thank you.
We authors dread a lot of things, but one of the biggest is the editing process. It’s a painful, raw look at the words that once flowed so easily and flawlessly down onto the page. We shake at the idea of having our work torn apart, and yet it is the necessary evil that is destined to make us better at what we do. Maxann Dobson at The Polished Pen is – in a word – amazing. She embraced this worry-wort of an author and made what could have been a terrifying ordeal a painless one. Max, I’m so grateful for the teacher you are. Your willingness to share your knowledge, answer my dumb questions, and generally put my mind at ease, is not something I will ever forget. I look forward to working with you for many years to come.
I’d thank to thank Karis Rogerson. Karis, you were so very gracious, reaching out to me and other authors on Twitter and volunteering to do an article. The profile piece that you did featuring me and my work will always be a highlight of my career.