“You’ll need to lose this,” he said, tugging gently on the blanket.
I braced myself against his shoulders and stood shakily, letting the blanket slide the length of my body to pool around my feet. I’m normally very self-conscious about my scars, but it wasn’t as if Alfred hadn’t seen them before. He had seen the vicious injury first hand and compared to that, the scars were nothing.
“Better?” I asked.
“Much,” he said, smiling.
I sat back down and slid my feet into the water, moaning as the heat soothed my aching calf muscles. Alfred wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly against his chest, but careful not to touch my breasts.
“Do you think you could sit up long enough for me to get undressed?”
I tried to turn my head to look at him, but a sharp pain near my temple changed my mind.
“Undressed? You’re getting in with me?”
“How else do you expect me to wash your hair? You can’t sit up on your own. You’re barely conscious.”
He did have a point. I wasn’t entirely sure I could sit up long enough for him to get in. So, I decided not to argue.
“All right.” I slid slowly down into the water and propped my arms on the side of the tub, leaning my cheek against my forearm. It was the only way I could keep from sliding all the way under. I watched Alfred begin to unbutton his deep purple shirt that I’d only then noticed went every well with his olive skin. Never had I had such a craving for caramel and been so helpless to do anything about it.
“Are you going to watch?” he inquired softly.
“I can’t turn my head without getting dizzy,” I answered honestly, but with a smirk that I couldn’t seem to control.
He walked around behind me with a smile, and I heard his clothes fall to the floor. As I felt Alfred slide in the tub behind me, my heart beat faster, causing my head to throb. He reached around my ribs and pulled me back against him with a splash. Drifting in and out of consciousness, I took pleasure in the feel of his long fingers as they massaged their way through my short hair with an expert tenderness that I had not expected.
When the last of the blood had been washed away, I half turned in his arms, laying my face against his chest.
“I’m I clean?”
“Your hair is, but I’m afraid I can’t do anything about your mind.”
I laughed softly, careful not to move my head.
“I can barely move, Alfred. I think you can safely assume that I’m not going to molest you.”
“Some days, you take the fun out of living,” he teased as he ran his fingers through my wet hair and began to massage my scalp.
“Mmmm.”
“Stop, you’re turning me on.” I could hear the laughter in his voice and it made me smile.
As I looked at his handsome face, I realized that my eyes were beginning to lose focus. There was something that I wanted to tell him while I most likely would not be held accountable for whatever I might say.
I rested my cheek back against his chest as I said, “I had a dream about you.”
Alfred knew about my dream journal. I had mentioned to him before, though not in any great detail how most of my dreams had a way of coming true, whether literally, or symbolically, and I’d always been fascinated by dream interpretation. He was very still as I told him about the dream, especially the part where he went into the water, knowing that he would sink, but thought that wouldn’t be so terrible a fate, if he were only closer to me when he went under. Deciding not to skip the details, I also told him how I had seen myself through his eyes. I also let slip how I had told Kat about the dream and she said that it was only further proof that he wanted me. Her exact words were, “If he knew he had a chance you wouldn’t be able to beat him loose with a stick.”
He laughed at that last part. “She’s right. If I thought I had a snowball’s chance in Hell, I’d have been waiting outside your door the other night, instead of on the couch. Although, that might have been the most profoundly stupid thing I’ve done to gain a woman’s attention thus far.”
“There are so many reasons why I shouldn’t get involved with you,” I said.
“Name one.”
I couldn’t. Maybe it was the head injury, or maybe I just didn’t have a good enough reason to not notice how great he looked, wet and naked, and right in front of me. I was beginning to ramble and went on to say things that I probably shouldn’t have.
“I’m sorry that I never touch you,” I apologized sincerely, running my wet fingers through his hair.
“Why is that?” he asked softly.
“It’s not that I’ve never wanted to touch you,” I went on when I should have stopped. “I have very much wanted to know what it feels like to touch you. But I was afraid that if I knew, I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off.”
I felt slightly embarrassed by this confession, but only until I heard his response. “I would very much like to know what you taste like, but I’m afraid if I knew ... I might eat you alive.”
Damn, he was good. Where was this man three and a half years ago when I’d met Bradley? I was struck with a profound sense of loss as I realized, he was right here. The whole time I’d spent my love and my time on some jerk that didn’t deserve the effort, here was a nice man who seemed to genuinely care for me. Stupid is too mild of a word for what I had been.
Alfred cradled my head in his hand as he leaned in to kiss me. He paused, hovering above my lips for a few seconds. I think somehow both of us knew that with that contact, things would change. His lips were warm and tender as they brushed gently against mine. I heard myself sigh and leaned into his embrace. For the first time, I understood how much I had wanted, no needed for Alfred to hold me like this. My hands seemed to move of their own accord from his chest to his shoulders, pulling him closer to me. My arms had been the only thing keeping my bare breasts from touching him. With that obstacle removed I pressed myself against him, my nipples hardening against the roughness of the hair on his chest.
The kiss deepened, causing him to press slightly harder against the back of my head. I moaned, but not in the way he had expected, I’m sure.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, the pupils of his dark eyes dilated with desire.
I offered him a weak smile as I said, “Don’t take this as rejection, but I’ve got a headache.”
He laughed, a deep and knowledgeable sound that seemed a foreign thing coming from Alfred. It was the sort of laugh that says, “I know you want me.”
“Don’t worry,” he whispered as he kissed my lips more softly. “I’m not going to jump you.”
“You’re not?” I pulled back to see his reaction.
“No.” He smiled. “As long as I’ve waited, I’d prefer you to be up to the task.”
“How long have you waited?” I asked, more seriously than I’d intended.
“Too long,” he said, as he pulled my body against him, running his other hand down my spine. I ached with the need to press myself against him, to touch as much of him as possible. However, my head felt like it had a death metal band beating around inside it.
I groaned with disappointment as I slid back down, placing my cheek against his chest. Alfred held me tightly against him, cradling me as if I would disappear should he let go.
“I’ve got to get my mind on something else,” I mumbled, my face still pressed against him.
“Well,” he sighed, “you never told me your opinion of the dream.”
“My interpretation, you mean?”
“Mmhm.”
I thought about the dream for a moment, my brain seemed to be inside a heavy fog, but I remembered the important parts.
“Water,” I began, “is always symbolic of emotions. Like, if it were rain, then emotions would be pouring down on you. But in this case, they were nearly concealed, beneath the surface, coming up through the floor.”
I paused for a moment before continuing, “You were trying to find a light in the dark ... and thes
e emotions, you were sinking in them, they overwhelmed you.”
I pulled back enough to see his face when I asked, “Do you really see me that way?”
Alfred gave me a smile that warmed me in places the hot water could never reach.
“I think you’re the only one who doesn’t,” he said.
His response surprised me.
“But, I’m scarred,” I said.
He placed his hand against the side of my face, stroking my cheek with his thumb.
“Your most devastating scars are not worn on the outside,” he said.
Not knowing what to say, I lowered my eyes. Alfred put his hand underneath my chin, and turned me back to face him. “You are not a ruined beauty,” he whispered kindly. “I see the way you hide your scars. From everyone else, that’s fine, but not from me, you don’t need to hide from me. Every time you let me catch a glimpse I think you’re secretly trying to horrify me, to prove that you are a monster, because in your mind, you look like one.”
Alfred was right. All this time, I thought he was oblivious to what was going on around him, but I was wrong. He may have seen more of me than I did. Just when I thought we had finally changed to a subject that didn’t arouse me, he kissed me again.
“You meant to get my mind off sex, remember?”
He pressed his lips against my forehead in a gesture that made me feel pitiful and lost. “Don’t take this as rejection,” he teased, “but, maybe you should put some clothes on.”
I laughed. “You’re the only man who’s ever asked me to put clothes on.”
“Well,” he said, “you’re the only woman I’ve ever made that suggestion to.”
I splashed away from him to prop on the tub again as I said sarcastically, “Oh, I feel so special.”
“You should,” he said sternly, “I would have just molested anyone else.”
I snickered. “Don’t make me laugh, it hurts.”
“If I didn’t care so much about you, that’s not the only thing that would be hurting by now.”
That made me laugh before I could stop myself. “Alfred!” I scolded, cradling my aching head in my hands. “Are you trying to kill me?”
He laughed again, echoing that deep and seductive rumble that I’d noticed before as I propped my head against the tub again. He started to get out of the tub, smiled at me and said, “No peeking.”
“You’re kidding right? If I don’t get to touch, the least I can do is look.”
“You should have looked when you had the chance,” he teased.
“That’s not fair. I couldn’t see through the bubbles,” I protested.
He looked at me and crossed his arms with an expression that said it didn’t matter how much I argued the matter, he wasn’t putting on a show for me.
“Fine,” I sighed, closing my eyes.
I heard Alfred climbing out of the tub and after a few moments, couldn’t control my urge to look. I opened my eyes just in time to see him take his chocolate colored bathrobe and swing it around his shoulders. The view from the back was so good, I wished I’d opened my eyes in time to see the front. The lovely caramel of his skin glowed with moisture, causing the light to reflect off the perfectly formed muscles of his back. Alfred was in better shape than I had suspected. It was a shame what his clothes concealed. His legs were as nicely toned as his back, but it was his ass that I couldn’t keep my eyes off. Alfred had a beautiful ass. I smiled to myself as I observed the lovely muscular dimples flex near his hip as he half turned to tie his robe.
“What are you smiling at?” he asked, turning back to me.
“Nice ass,” I said, feeling some satisfaction when he blushed. “Any chance I could see the rest?”
“Not tonight.” He winked, as he retrieved a towel from the linen closet built into the wall. “You’re injured, remember?”
Making a conscious decision to be wicked, I reached out, trying to find the switch in my mind I had flipped when dealing with Bade earlier that evening. I felt the same warm rush through my body I’d felt before as I replied, “Give me till morning.”
He took a shaky breath before asking, “What the hell was that?”
“I’m not sure yet. Did you like it?”
Alfred smiled, looking unsure of how to proceed with the conversation. “Are you trying to seduce me?”
I smiled provocatively, relishing the opportunity to throw his own smartass remark back in his face. “If I were trying to seduce you, you wouldn’t have to ask.”
“Fair enough,” he said, placing a large black towel on the edge of the tub.
A rush of energy seemed to flow out of me as I let go of the seductive power I had tapped into. I felt weaker than before. Apparently it took effort to be a sexual deviant. Alfred helped me to stand while he wrapped the towel around my body. I felt cold without either Alfred or the hot water to keep me warm.
I shivered slightly as I stepped onto the fuzzy rug beside the tub.
“Would you like me to dry you?” Alfred asked.
“And have you get a cheap thrill from running your hands all over me? I don’t think so.”
“It wouldn’t be cheap,” he insisted. “Come on then,” he said, smiling. “I’ve got another solution.”
Alfred carried me back into the bedroom, removed my towel and spread it across the foot of his king size bed.
“This is your solution?” I asked skeptically. “Get me naked again?”
He laughed. “Just lie across the towel and shut up.”
“Ooo, I like it when you’re forceful,” I teased.
I crawled slowly onto the bed, my head still spinning, but improving slowly. I stretched out face down across the towel, resting my cheek against my hands. I heard Alfred rummaging around under the bathroom sink.
“What are you doing?” I asked, without turning to look.
“Ssh,” he said.
Well, I didn’t know where to put being told to shut up twice in under five minutes. So, I shut up. He came back a few minutes later with a blow dryer.
“You leave me no choice,” he said grimly as he looked for an outlet close by.
“Are you gonna blow me?” I joked.
He gave me a look that said in no uncertain terms I should stop while I was ahead.
“Sorry,” I said, still laughing. “I couldn’t help myself.”
“Try,” he replied, attempting to sound stern, but failing miserably due in part to the grin he couldn’t wipe off his face.
“How’s your head?” he asked as he turned on the dryer.
“Better, I think.”
I’m not sure if it was the warm air across my skin, or the soothing low hum of the dryer that relaxed me so drastically, but I was nearly asleep when Alfred said, “Want me to dry your hair?”
“Sure.” I stretched, catlike and rolled over.
Alfred sat cross legged on the bed, placing my head on his lap. I pulled the towel over me, more to hold in the warmth than to cover up. As he rubbed over the sore spot on the back of my skull I asked, “Did I get him?”
“The guy who hit you?”
“Yeah.”
“If you mean the guy lying beside you on the ground, whose face looked like hamburger, yeah, you got him.”
“Good,” I said nastily. “Bastard hit me twice in the same damn spot.”
“What happened to Bade’s nipple, by the way?” he asked.
I looked up at him without lifting my head. “You saw him?”
“Only briefly. He turned and ran just as I came into the clearing.” He added disappointedly, “Couldn’t get a clear shot.”
Alfred ran his fingers through my hair as he dried it, causing it to stand on end.
“So, what happened?” he pressed.
“I bit it off,” I said mater-of-factly.
“Hmm, I shouldn’t have asked,” he said.
“Why? Does it bother you? It was life and death, for crying out loud, I had to do something.”
“Oh, it’s not that,” he assur
ed me.
“Then what is it?”
“Um, exactly how close to my nipples were you when we were in the tub?”
My laugh sounded soft and seductively throaty as I replied, “Honey, I was close to a lot of things. If I were you, nipples would be the least of my concern.”
“Planning to permanently injure me, were you?”
“Give me till morning,” I repeated darkly.
He settled back against the pillows and reached for me. As I cuddled up against him I couldn’t resist provoking him. “I thought you weren’t a teddy bear.”
“Don’t spread it around,” he said with a charming half smile.
“Alfred?”
“Yes.” He reached for the remote to the flat screen television mounted above the mantle over the fireplace.
“What if I die in my sleep?”
He looked at me like that was out of the question. “Well, aren’t you just a little ray of sunshine?” He smiled compassionately. “Don’t look so pitiful. I’m going to stay up for a while.” He kissed my forehead, holding his lips against me only a few seconds longer than was necessary. “Io volonta guardare sopra tu,” he whispered. (I will watch over you.)
“Mmmm,” I purred. “Keep talking.”
He smiled as I ran my hand inside his robe. “Do you think that’s wise?” he asked.
“Allow me something,” I half-heartedly complained as I began to rub over the hair on his chest. I ran my bare foot along his leg, appreciating how the soft hair felt against the smoothness of my skin.
“Do you always snuggle this good?” he asked playfully.
“Always,” I sighed as I drifted off to sleep, still rubbing his chest.
Chapter Eight
If I had dreams, I don’t recall, but I do remember feeling safe. I awoke the next morning, not wanting to open my eyes, afraid that the man wrapped around me might be only a dream. My eyes fluttered reluctantly open and I surveyed the comfortable décor of Alfred’s room. We had switched places somehow in the night, and I was now facing the bay window that overlooked the garden out back. There were inviting suede seats built into the wall underneath the window, covered with a variety of cream and chocolate colored pillows. The cabinet drawers built underneath the seats must have held something special. There was a tiny gold lock attached to one drawer. As lovely and inviting as the bay window was, it let in entirely too much light. This, I reasoned must be why Alfred had preferred thick bed curtains instead of the sheer fabric like I had upstairs.
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