“Your home… It’s so homey.” I quickly cover my mouth, afraid I may have insulted her. “I mean, not that I would expect it not to be, it’s just that, because, well…” Shut up Dani. Ram squeezes my hand while Virginia warmly smiles my way.
“I know what you mean. Jacob was all about family. He wanted his three children to grow up in a home filled with love and life.” She leans in to me and whispers, “Unlike my parents’ home. Very stuffy. All white. Couldn’t touch a damn thing.” My mouth drops as she repeats the exact thought I had just before. “Now come. Dinner is ready.”
She pulls me out of Ram’s grip and escorts me through the kitchen. The room is gigantic with what I can guess are all top-of-the-line appliances. Stainless steel with cabinetry from head to toe. The island is covered in dishes of all sorts, mashed potatoes, green beans, rolls, I feel like I could go on. She brings us through another entryway and into a cozy dining room, a large table filled to the brim with food.
“Wow. Who else is joining us?” I ask, wondering if she invited over half the town. Ram laughs, pulling out the chair for me.
“Nobody,” he says with a chuckle. “My mother just loves to cook for an army.”
Virginia smacks her son on the arm and takes her own seat. “That’s true, but my boys also like to eat. I remember when they were younger, it was impossible to ever get them full. Poor Jacob and I thought we were raising wolves. Their metabolisms were off the charts.” I look over at Ram, who’s nodding, confirming what she said is true. “Reagan, despite being built like a pixie, can just about out eat those boys any day of the week. But Roman, he was my big eater. He played sports so you couldn’t feed him fast enough before he burned it all off. And Ram…”
“I…well, I was just hungry.” He smiles bright and wide. I take his hand under the table, and he threads his fingers between mine.
The rest of the dinner is wonderful. Virginia is kind and funny, and there is no doubt how proud she is of her boys and only daughter. When she speaks of her late husband the sadness is evident, but the love is so thick in her words, I catch myself wiping at my eyes. I can’t remember the last time I ate such good food. And so much of it.
Virginia explained that after her husband died, she took up cooking as a hobby to keep busy. That, of course, was after she attempted knitting, piano, tennis, and scrapbooking. Cooking was a way to give her some happiness when she was missing her Jacob. That also found her cooking day and night. Since she was an empty nester nowadays and only got her kids over so often, she ended up packaging a lot of the food and bringing it to the local food pantries, helping on the weekends, or offering to families in need. On occasion, she flies out to see Reagan in California if their schedules allow.
I may have just admitted to myself that I am in love with Ram, but it took me less than an hour to admit I was also in love with his mother. She’s sweet and funny. Kind in all aspects. We share the same taste in clothes and I find myself for the first time ever talking fashion with someone. The night is just amazing. Once dinner is over, Ram offers to clear the table, while Virginia grabs my hand and tells her son we will be in the study, getting an after-dinner drink. It confuses me since I thought that was a man’s thing. Ram just gives me a kiss on the forehead and a wink before telling me to have fun.
“So, how is my baby boy really doing? He seems happy.” She hands me a crystal flute filled with what looks like champagne. We both sit in two adjacent lounge chairs properly seated next to one another. Our view overlooks a large bay window. It’s dark, so it’s hard to tell what’s out there, but I do notice it’s begun to snow.
“I think he’s happy too. Or at least I hope. He seems happy. I hope I’m making him happy.” Let’s see how many times I can use the word happy in a sentence. I turn to Virginia. “What I’m trying to say is…”
She waves me off. “I know what you mean. And he is happy. I haven’t seen that side of Ram in ages. Years probably. Maybe even before his dad died.” My heart hurts every time she mentions her husband.
“I’m sorry for your loss, really,” I say, not because I feel I need to. Because I truly am.
“Oh, thank you, dear. Jacob was such a good man. Worked hard. Cared for his family. His company was his pride and joy, but his kids were his life. There was nothing he wasn’t involved in. From sports, to school, to boyfriends and girlfriends. He made sure he knew exactly how his kids were being raised.”
“He sounds wonderful.”
“He was,” she agrees, her eyes distant as she thinks about him.
Silence falls upon us. I think of my own parents who were just as loving in their own way. They were involved and caring, but as I grew up, I learned how sheltered they kept me. We didn’t have much money so certain luxuries were never on our radar. My wardrobe was always basic, because that’s what we could afford. I didn’t get to go to any fancy colleges because it was too expensive. I didn’t play sports because they were afraid I would get injured, but I’m sure cost was the main factor. They did make sure to teach me kindness and love. My daddy would always say that a giving person always receives the most in the end. I wasn’t too sure what he meant, but ever since Ram came into my life, I feel like I get it now. He gives me so much more.
“How’s the depression?”
Caught off guard, I turn and utter, “Huh?”
“Ram’s depression.”
Her question comes from left field. I didn’t even know Ram had depression.
“I… I didn’t know he suffered from it. I would have never… He’s just always so… happy.”
She smiles at me, lifting her hand and patting mine that’s resting on the armrest.
“Not too many people do. He’s very private about it. He loved his dad. They spent a lot of time together. Wanted to follow him in his footsteps ever since he was little. So when he died, Ram took it the hardest. Started acting out. Stopped hanging out with friends. He stopped caring about college. He even dropped out for a while. We didn’t hear from him for some time. He and his brother fought. Roman just wanted to help Ram. But to Ram, he was trying to take his father’s place in his life. And Ram didn’t want that. He wanted his dad. The only one who was able to really reach him was Reagan. She was about fourteen at the time and was the only person he’d talk to on the phone.”
Being here has been an emotional roller coaster. From amazing stories to such sadness. Ram has depression. Why did he never tell me? I scrape my brain for anything that would have triggered it. Was he ever depressed with me? Did he ever show signs? Depression is not a small thing to keep to one’s self. Being allergic to pets, maybe. But depression? Why would he keep this? Again, the fight we had about lying surfaces to the forefront of my mind.
“Either way. He looks healthy. And happy. How is my other baby? Still the mamma’s boy he’s always been?”
“Who?” I barely register her question, still lost in thought.
“Roman, my eldest but biggest baby.”
“Oh, um, he’s doing well, I guess. He’s really busy, so I don’t get to see him much.” Or he’s too busy battling Andie when we are all together.
“Now that boy. He may never find a girl. So needy. Always wanting to find one just like his mamma.”
At that I laugh, because Roman seems like a well put together businessman. Dominant, always in control. “I guess I never got that impression from him.”
Virginia snickers, taking a hefty swig of her drink. “That boy would still have me do his laundry if I offered. He exudes this tough man persona, but he’s a softy at heart. Still comes to his mamma for advice, and ohhhhweee, when he gets sick. God help any woman he finally holds down. He will make you reconsider having children of your own. Huge baby.” She winks at me, finishing off her drink. I do the same, and as I lay the empty glass on the coffee table, Ram enters.
“You two behaving? I hope my mother isn’t telling you any embarrassing stories from high school.” He leans over and presses a kiss to my lips. I can smell the mint gum and
beer on his breath.
“Oh, you know, just telling Dani here how you sucked your thumb until you were twelve.”
“I did not,” Ram argues, but the gleam in his eye tells me otherwise.
“Either way, you—”
“MOM!” We all turn toward the opening of the study to hear Roman’s voice booming through the halls. His large frame takes up the entire doorway, his stressed features prominent on his face.
“Oh, hello dear, I wasn’t expecting you.” Virginia smiles as she stands to hug her son.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” he utters. “I just need to talk to you.” Virginia smirks as if she knows that ‘I need to talk’ look.
“Sure thing, baby. Why don’t we chat in the kitchen? I have a homemade pecan pie, your favorite. You can fill your sweet belly while we talk.”
Ram and I both look at one another curiously, wondering what that is all about. Ram shrugs his shoulders, and after a few seconds, he grabs me, putting his finger over his mouth, telling me silently to be quiet. We tip toe to the kitchen and stand just outside the door as our ears perk to eavesdrop.
“But she is just out of control. How do I please someone who is so damn difficult?”
We both hear Virginia sigh, the sounds of the chair creaking as she sits. “Honey, women are delicate creatures. Sometimes you have to allow them to express who they are before trying to tell them what they should or should not want.”
Roman scoffs. “Oh, this one knows exactly what she wants. She’s like an untamed lion, with claws as sharp as knives, but then there is this soft side to her. Where she’s just so… so… wonderful.”
Ram throws his hand over my mouth when a small chuckle escapes my lips. “Shhh,” he scolds me, that mischievous smile matching my own.
“I can’t read her. It’s like one minute I think we understand each other. And the next, she’s trying to kill me. I don’t know whether to kiss her or run for my life!”
At that, we both start laughing. Ram pulls us away from the doorway, dragging me back toward the study. “You busted us, you little minx you.” He laughs, bending down and taking my lips in a playful kiss.
“Were you just eavesdropping?” We both turn to see Roman, not looking as put together as normal. “What are you, five?”
Ram wraps his arm around my shoulder, bringing me close. “Sorry, we were just walking by and may have heard some things. I didn’t know you were seeing someone.”
“I’m not! I mean, I am. Sort of. Hell, it’s just fucking complicated, okay?” He huffs, running his fingers through his thick hair. He grunts, then turns and storms out, griping over his shoulder, “Just mind your own business.” We hear him say his goodbyes to Virginia and the slamming of the front door.
As Ram and I look at each other peculiarly, we both share the same conclusion that we might know exactly what or who his complication is.
Nice Try, Rameo
“YOU’RE GOING TO GIVE ME a daughter-in-law.” Mom’s whispered giddy words keep replaying over and over in my head from the other night. Apparently Dani and I are solid stuff. I know it to be true but I’m glad others see it. Now, I just need to figure out a way to make Dani admit she loves me too.
“Where are we going?” Dani questions, giving my hand a squeeze.
I flash her a warm grin as we pull up to the outdoor mall. For her actual Christmas present, I’d already bought tickets to Silver Dollar City in Branson. I’m hoping she’ll be excited to take a trip with me to Missouri. Tonight is more or less a date night. “We’re going to spend the evening having some fun.” We still have a week until Christmas, but I like dragging out her surprises so she gets presents every day.
Her pretty hazel eyes sparkle with wonder and I want to memorize her expression so that I can etch it permanently into my brain. Once we’re out of the car, I smile as the brisk December air whips around us. I’m hoping, according to the forecast, that she’ll get an extra surprise later. Dani clutches my hand, wearing a wide grin, as we make our way through the entrance that leads to all of the shops. She stops to gush over a window display with mannequins posed as if they are decorating a Christmas tree. Her smile is contagious and mine is never leaving as long as she’s around.
“I love this place,” she tells me with a giggle. “Andie hates coming here because you have to walk outside, but I love it.”
She starts toward the first shop that carries hats, but I tug her away. A look of confusion crosses over her features when I guide her in the opposite direction. At first she seems disappointed, until we step into a pet shop.
“Oh my God!” she squeals and releases my hand to kneel in front of a gated area with kittens running wild. The worker laughs at her as Dani scoops up a black kitten into her arms. “He’s so cute! Look how precious he is, Ram!”
I chuckle and kneel down beside her to pet the squirmy thing. Her smile is absolutely breathtaking as she nuzzles her cheek against him. We spend a good half-hour petting every single animal in the shop. Once I finally drag her out of there, she’s on top of the world.
“I love them all!” she exclaims, clapping her hands together.
With a snort, I give her a teasing grin. “Well, cats are one of your favorite things.”
Her eyes narrow at me, but this time she doesn’t resist when I walk her toward a candy shop. In the front window, a worker stretches green taffy on one of their unique machines. Like a little kid, she stops and gazes in wonder. I swear we watch that machine go for a good twenty minutes before I’m able to get her to go inside. From there, she gets sucked in to sampling different flavors. Her thrill and excitement make me fall in love with her over and over again with each endearing smile. Once she’s got a bag full of saltwater taffy and babbles on about how awesome it was, we leave the store.
“Saltwater taffy is one of my favorite things,” she says, chomping on the candy.
I laugh and wink at her. “I know.”
Her eyes do the narrowing thing again, but then we’re off to our next destination. The ice rink is bustling with people but I’m only looking for one. When I hear a squeal, I know she’s found us.
“Dani!” Andie screeches and nearly tackles my girl. “Tell me why I’m here to skate—which you know is my most not favorite thing in the world—and why I was told to dress like a ho!”
Dani bursts into laughter and doubles over, her dark hair falling in her face. Andie gives me a perturbed look, but I’m grateful she accepted the invitation. And as requested, she’s dressed like she’s ready to go clubbin’ in a skintight dress. Luckily, she wore leggings underneath but her thigh high boots are totally hooker-ish and so is her furry white jacket. Her makeup is layered on thick and her blonde hair is a bouffant mess.
“Y-You’re one of my favorite things,” Dani giggles. “And so is skating!” She charges for me and throws her arms around my neck. “Ram, you’re perfect.”
I hug her tight and kiss the soft flesh of her neck. “So are you.”
The girls skate a few laps while Andie bitches the whole time. I shoot my brother a quick text.
Me:
It takes Roman three seconds to reply.
Bro: What. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. She. Wearing?
Smirking, I ignore his text and continue to watch my girl and her best friend as they wobble over the ice. When Dani stops to come give me a kiss, I whisper in her ear. “You ready to ditch your friend and see the rest of your surprises?”
She laughs, but then frowns. “What about Andie?”
Smirking, I show her my text to Roman. “She’ll have company soon.”
My sweet girlfriend gives me a devilish look as she hurries to take her ice skates off. We abandon Andie and rush off to a stage that’s off to the side of the rink. A bunch of children are on stage and are caroling. Dani’s eyes shimmer with tears. I know I did well planning this all out for her. We make our way through the crowd of proud parents to the front. Song after song, Dani lean
s against me singing. My heart seems to expand larger than ever before. But when they start singing “White Christmas,” my heart aches for my dad. Understanding washes over Dani because she gives me a peck on my cheek. “Christmas songs are my favorite. I’m ready for my next surprise, though.”
With a sad smile, I leave the area so I can put that memory behind me. I’ve been watching the time but my next surprise hasn’t happened yet. I frown in disappointment until I feel something cold hit my cheek.
I stop dead in my tracks and pull her into my arms. “Look up.”
She looks up in wonder as if I had the magical ability to make it snow just for her. Snowflakes dot her pretty face, and again, I wish for the ability to burn this moment into my mind forever. When her shimmering eyes meet mine again, she mouths the words thank you. I give her a nod as if it’s no big deal before sliding my palms to her cold cheeks. Our lips meet softly at first, and then I kiss her deeply in front of the crowded shoppers. Her tongue is sweet like the taffy, and I crave to taste her all night long. Someone, who sounds an awful lot like Roman, yells, “GET A ROOM!” and we break away.
“Come on,” I tell her, “I have another surprise for you.”
She beams at me as I drag her to the vintage comic shop. I’d called ahead to make sure they had what I needed. As soon as we make it inside, we cough a little on the haze of incense before Dani gets lost thumbing through used DVDs. I leave her to get my hold from behind the counter that I paid for over the phone. When I make it back over to her, I hold out my present.
“Oh, Ram,” she says softly and takes the box set from me.
“It’s only the first season of ER but I thought we could keep it over at my place since you’ve been spending time over there a lot. I know it’s your—”
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