His pectoral muscles bunched as she slid her hands back up his chest to his shoulders. He fed her passionate open-mouthed kisses, and she devoured them, kissing him back. Undiluted lust twisted her stomach into knots and burned her up inside, urging her to touch as much of him as possible. To eat him up and worry about it later. He tasted so good. Like a warm healthy man. The kiss turned wild as she moved her hands over his shoulders and back, ran her fingers through his cool hair, and unfastened the pearl buttons on the front of his shirt.
He pulled back and looked into her face, his breathing hard and fast as if he’d just jogged five miles. “Daisy,” he whispered and buried his face in the side of her neck. A deep moan vibrated his chest, and he slid his open mouth to the side of her throat. His hand slipped to her waist then over her belt around her hips. His fingers pulled up the bottom of her dress. His bare hand touched the top of her thigh, and slid to her behind, cupping her through the thin layer of her silk panties.
“Someone might see us,” she warned, her voice a thin, lame protest.
He pulled her to her toes and his voice was a husky rasp when he asked, “Would you care?”
She guessed not because she pulled the front of his shirt wide and placed her palms on his flat stomach. His skin was hot to the touch and slightly damp, a toxic sheen of desire and testosterone that seeped through her fingertips, traveled up her arms and went straight to her head. His warm wet mouth sucked the hollow of her throat and her eyes drifted shut. It had been so long since she’d felt the push and pull of sex. The feverish rush and carnal ache. She felt it now, tugging her under until everything else was a blur.
He coaxed her leg around his waist, and the hard ridge of his erection pressed into her crotch, through the layers of his clothes and her thin panties. He grabbed her other thigh and lifted her up the wall until both her legs wrapped around his waist. Until his heated gaze met hers, then he shoved his pelvis against her.
“It’s been so long,” she moaned.
With his free hand, he popped the snaps down the front of her dress. His gaze held hers as he asked, “How long?” The backs of his fingers touched the swells of her breasts, the satin of her bra, and her cleavage. The bodice of her dress fell open and he lowered his gaze to her demi bra. Without looking up, he asked again, “How long has it been for you, Daisy?”
Every sensation in her body seemed to radiate outward from where their bodies touched. She ran her hands across his naked chest and combed her fingers through the short dark hair. “What?”
“How long has it been since you’ve had sex?”
She hadn’t meant to make that particular confession out loud. “Awhile.”
He pushed his palm flat against her breast. “How long’s awhile?”
It was too late to take it back now. “Two years.”
His fingers pressed into her flesh that rose above her bra. “We can’t take this any further right here.”
She moaned low in her throat and squeezed her thighs tighter. His knees buckled and he planted his hands on the side of the building by her head to keep them from falling. He moved his feet farther apart and brought his erection hard against her.
“I don’t have a condom on me or in my car.” He kissed her forehead. “Come home with me, Daisy.”
It had been so long since she’d had to worry about condoms. Not since before she and Steven had tried to have another child and discovered that he couldn’t. A long time since she’d had to worry about pregnancy or anything else. Over fifteen years since she’d been with anyone but Steven. With the last rational part of her brain, she knew she couldn’t do this. Not with Jack. Not here. Not at his house. Not anywhere. “I can’t do this with you,” she said before she made the second biggest mistake of her life.
He kissed the side of her neck. “Sure you can.”
“No, Jack.” She lowered her feet to the ground and dropped her hands to her sides. “I’m not going to have sex with you.”
He took a step back into the gold pool of light from the building and ran his fingers through the sides of his hair. He closed his eyes and pulled air deep into his lungs. “God damn you, Daisy,” he said, his voice a rasp of lust and anger. “You’re still as big a tease as you ever were.”
“I didn’t come here to tease you or have sex with you.” His naked chest was too close, and the light from the building shined across his moist skin. She pressed her palms against the building behind her and fought the urge to reach out and touch him. To push her face to his chest and lick him like a Dreamsicle. She raised her gaze to his face. “I told you why I’m here.”
He looked at her, his green eyes glittered with frustration. “You still think we can talk?”
“No, not tonight.”
“That’s what I thought,” he said as he wiped her red lipstick from the corner of his mouth.
“Tomorrow.”
He laughed without humor. “Daisy, if you show up at my house tomorrow, I’m going to give you what you really want,” he said evenly as he buttoned his shirt. “Guaran-Goddamn-teed.”
She frowned and didn’t have to ask what he was talking about.
He told her anyway. “I’m going to fuck you till you faint,” he said, then he turned and walked away.
She watched him leave, his broad shoulders disappearing as he moved down the side of the building toward the front. Within seconds, darkness swallowed him up and all she could hear was the thud of his boots and the hum of insects. She knew she should be outraged. Disgusted. Horrified. Relieved that she’d come to her senses before they’d had sex. Yes, she knew she should feel all those things, and maybe she would tomorrow. But tonight . . . tonight she felt none of those things. Beyond frustration, with lust pounding though her veins, she was more curious than anything. Was it possible to have sex until you fainted?
And if so, did Jack know from experience?
Chapter 9
That night, Daisy dreamed she flew around Lovett in nothing but her shorty pajamas, over the tops of the trees and power poles. Mount Rainier suddenly rose up out of the flat Texas panhandle, and she flew over that too. Her toes touched the snowy peak as higher and higher she soared. Out of control like a helium balloon, up and up she went, and she was terrified because she knew there was only one outcome. She was going to fall. It was inevitable, and it was going to hurt like hell.
Then just as she was about to break through the Earth’s atmosphere, gravity sucked at her feet and yanked her back down. Down past Mount Rainier and the tops of the trees, and she knew she was going to die.
Before she hit, her eyes popped open and she realized two things at once. One, she wasn’t going to go smack, and two, she was holding her breath. Morning light filtered across her bed and she let out a sigh of relief. But her relief was short-lived as the events of the prior evening came back to her all at once.
Smack.
The humiliation she hadn’t felt last night brought her fully awake like a bucket of cold water. Now in the light of day, she recalled every excruciating detail. Jack’s slick warm mouth, the feel of his bare chest and the touch of his hands on her.
She groaned and covered her face with a pillow. The memory of her legs wrapped around his waist was especially painful. She hadn’t behaved like that since . . . since . . . since she’d pulled Jack into a closet their senior year in high school. Back then she’d been young and naive. She was neither of those things now.
Now she was an idiot.
Last night she’d wanted to lick Jack. Today she had to tell him about Nathan. How could she look him in the eyes after she’d kissed him and touched him. “Oh God,” she said as she recalled in detail her confession that she hadn’t had sex in two years. How could she face him after that?
She didn’t have a choice, that’s how.
She tossed the pillow off her head and got out of bed. Dressed in the same shorty pajamas as in her dream, she made her way downstairs. After Jack had left her against the wall at Slim Clem’s, she’d gone ba
ck into the bar, pleaded food poisoning, and made Lily take her home. She hadn’t seen Jack and, for that at least, was thankful.
Her mother sat at the breakfast nook in the kitchen wearing a pink nylon nightgown. One side of her blond cotton-candy hair looked a little flat.
Last night, Pippen had been sound asleep when Lily dropped her off, so he’d spent the night. He was in his high chair next to his grandmother, eating cereal and drinking juice from his Tommy cup. He wore his coonskin cap, his Blue’s Clues jammies, and a Cheerio was stuck to his cheek. “Good morning, Mom,” she greeted as she poured herself a cup of coffee. “How’s it going, Pip?”
“Watch ’toons,” Pippen answered.
“You can watch cartoons after breakfast,” Louella told him, then she glanced over at Daisy and used the tone of voice that let Daisy know she was very disappointed. “I heard what happened. Thelma Morgan called this morning and told me everything.”
Daisy felt her cheek catch fire. “Thelma Morgan saw me?” Where had she been hiding? Behind the Dumpster? It was only eight in the morning, and the day was already shaping up to be pure hell.
“She pulled into the Minute Mart for a cup of coffee and a bear claw, and she saw the whole thing.”
What? “Oh.” Daisy let out a huge sigh of relief and laughed. “That.”
“Yes that. What where you and Lily thinking? Making a fuss in public?” Louella took a bite of her toast. “For cryin’ all night loud in a bucket.”
“We were getting a Dr. Pepper at the Minute Mart,” Daisy explained and purposely left out the part about Lily’s stalking her soon to be ex. She walked across the kitchen and sat at the nook with her mother. “You-know-who,” she paused and glanced at Pippen, “and Kelly pulled into the parking lot, and one thing led to another. Then you-know-who shoved Lily.”
Louella pursed her lips and set her toast back on her plate. “You should have called the police.”
Probably. “I didn’t think. I just saw him push her and I lost my mind. Without giving it a thought, I slugged him in the eye and kneed him between the legs.” She still couldn’t believe she’d behaved like that.
One corner of her mother’s pursed lips turned up. “Did you damage him?”
Daisy shook her head and blew into her cup. “I don’t think so.”
“That seems a shame.” She pushed her plate aside. “Have you seen Jack?”
Yeah, she’d seen him. His naked chest and slick abdomen. His eyes at half mast and his lips moist from kissing her, but that wasn’t what her mother wanted to know. “I haven’t told him about Nathan yet,” she answered and took a drink of her coffee. “I’m going over there this morning to talk to him.”
One brow rose up Louella’s forehead. “You’ve certainly put it off until the last moment.”
“I know.” She looked down at the bright yellow tabletop. “I used to be so sure I’d done the right thing. I used to believe that not telling Jack about Nathan and moving to Washington had been best for everyone.”
“It was.”
“I’m not so sure now.” She brushed her hair behind her ears and took a deep breath. “Before I came back to town, I was sure. I was sure moving away with Nathan was the best choice, even for Jack.” She looked back up. “We always meant to tell him, Mom. We wanted to give Jack a few years to get his life together, and then we planned to tell him.”
Pippen dropped his empty cup on the floor and Louella bent to pick it up. “I know you did.” She set it on the table.
“But the longer we put it off, the harder it got. Months and years passed and there was always an excuse why we couldn’t tell him right then. I was trying to get pregnant with Steven’s baby or Nathan was happy and we didn’t want to disrupt his life. It was always something. Always an excuse, because how do you tell a man he has a child he doesn’t know about?” She leaned forward and crossed her forearms on the table. “Now I’m not so sure I did the right thing all those years ago. I’m beginning to think I never should have left without telling him.”
“I think you’re afraid and now you’re questioning everything.”
“Maybe.”
“Daisy, you were young and scared and you made the right decision at the time.”
She’d always thought that too. She didn’t know anymore. The only thing she knew for certain was that she’d been wrong to wait so long. How was she ever to make it right?
“Jack wasn’t ready to be a father,” her mother insisted. “Steven was.”
“You always liked Steven more than Jack.”
Her mother was quiet a moment than said, “That’s not really true. I just always thought Steven was the stabler of the two. Jack was more wild. You can’t blame a person for what’s in his nature, but you can’t rely on him either. Your daddy was reckless like that, and look what happened to him. To us.”
“Daddy didn’t die and leave us on purpose.”
“No, but he did. He left me with two children, a busted-up Winnebego and three hundred dollars.” Louella shook her head. “When it came to taking care of you and a baby, Steven was better prepared.”
“Because his family had money.”
“Money is important.” She held up her hand as if Daisy were going to argue. “I know love is too. I loved your daddy. He loved me and he loved you girls, but love doesn’t put food in your children’s mouths. Love doesn’t buy a winter coat or school shoes.” Her mother reached across the table and grabbed Daisy’s hand. “But even if you made the wrong decision all those years ago, it can’t be changed now. Nathan has a good life. Steven was a wonderful father. You did the best thing for your child.”
Listening to her mother, made it all sound so logical. Daisy wasn’t so sure anymore that the choice should have been left up to logic. Being young and scared explained why she hadn’t told him fifteen years ago. It didn’t explain why she hadn’t told him until now.
“Look at Lily,” her mother said just above a whisper. “Her life was chaotic long before you-know-who finally moved out. He was always running around on her. Always doing crazy things. She never should have married that wild boy, and Pippen is paying the highest price. He doesn’t talk as well as he should, and he is no where near ready for potty training. He’s actually been back sliding in his behavior.”
Daisy thought Lily could have done a lot more to protect and nurture Pippen, but she didn’t say so. She hadn’t been the perfect mother and wasn’t about to cast aspersions on anyone else’s parenting. “I’m going to call Nathan and remind him what time I’ll be home tomorrow.” She stood. “Then I’m going to Jack’s,” she said, and if she’d had any other option, she would have used it. He’d told her not to come to his house, and he’d given her that warning about fainting. Now, when she showed up, would he think she came there looking for sex?
Probably.
She took her coffee to her bedroom and called Nathan.
“I can’t wait for you to get home,” he said as soon as he picked up. “I can’t wait to get away from Michael Ann.”
“Come on now, she’s not that bad.”
“Mom, she still plays with Barbies. Last night, she tried to get me to be Ken.”
“Isn’t she a little old for Barbies?”
“Yeah, and Ollie tried to make me play dolls with her,” he said, his voice cracking with pubescent indignation. “I hate it here.”
“Well, this is your last night.” She set her mug on the bedside table and pulled Steven’s letter from the drawer. “Tomorrow they’ll take you home, and I’ll be there around three or three-thirty.”
“Thank God. And Mom?”
“Yeah, sugar lump?”
“Promise you won’t ever make me stay here again.”
Daisy laughed. “I promise if you promise to get a hair cut.”
There was a long pause and then he said, “Deal.”
After she hung up the telephone, she took a shower and thought about the night before. Jack was probably over his anger by now. More than likely he�
�d found some willing woman to take home. While she’d been dreaming about flying, he’d probably been having wild sex and was no doubt relieved this morning that she’d stopped things between them before they’d gone too far. Now that the fever of the night before had passed, he probably wouldn’t even remember that he’d threatened her.
Funny, though, the thought of him with another woman bothered her more than it should and more than she wanted to admit. The thought of him touching someone else made a lump in her stomach that hadn’t been there that first night when she’d seen him and Gina together in his kitchen.
Daisy dressed in her black bra and panties and tried to understand how her feelings had changed so much in such a short time. She pulled a plain black T-shirt over her head and figured that the more she was around Jack, the more she relived the past. It was inevitable, really. She’d always loved Jack as a friend, then she’d fallen in love with him. She’d fallen so hard and so deep, and despite what she’d said the night before, sex had been a big part of their past. Being close to Jack brought up all the old feelings. All the old lust and obsession and jealousy.
She’d thought she could breeze back into town, tell Jack about Nathan and not have to deal with the rest of it. She’d thought it was buried and long gone. She’d been wrong. It hadn’t gone anywhere. No, it had been waiting for her right where she’d left it.
She pulled a pair of shorts out of a drawer. If there was a consolation to this whole confusing mess, it was that once she was back home, it would all be over. No more secrets. No more confusion. No more kissing Jack Parrish.
“Daisy, if you show up at my house tomorrow, I’m going to give you what you really want,” Jack had warned. “I’m going to fuck you till you faint.”
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