Although the sun was now fully awake, the closed heavy curtains shrouded the house in shadows, making it only just possible to make out the furniture. As I was comfortable with the layout, there was no need to turn on the lights, and I entered the kitchen in darkness.
I became aware of a presence as I heard the voice. ‘Who are you?’
The shock of realising that I wasn’t alone caused me to drop the glass, where it shattered on the floor. I automatically reached down for something I could use as a weapon and was lucky to find that a large part of the base had survived and was within easy reach. As I held it out before me I tried to shout, but my heart was racing and my breath coming out in gasps, making it impossible to form more than a high pitched squeak.
‘Who’s there?’ I hissed with fear. A shadow rose up by the table and without any control, I stumbled backwards, trying to find the breath to call for Gabriel.
‘Adam,’ he said quietly as he walked towards me.
I should have felt relieved, but instead the panic rose further in me. A trickle of blood rolled down my hand as I gripped the broken glass tighter, but I was unable to relax my hold. My mind tried to reason that he wouldn’t hurt me, even if only for Gabriel’s sake, but my body refused to listen, arguing that he was angry enough to do it and he would have the abilities to leave no trace of what happened.
He stopped so close to me that his breath stirred my hair, and even in the shadows I could feel his eyes burning into me, making it impossible to turn away. Maybe his stare was one of his abilities, being able to paralyse his prey, making it impossible for them to flee from him.
‘What do you want with Gabriel?’ The question, along with the debilitating stare, confused me and I could only stand trapped by his gaze, unable to speak. ‘Why you?’ he asked without waiting for an answer.
Beginning to believe that he did not require me to speak, I tried to force open my grip on the glass, aware that I was causing damage to myself. The silence in the kitchen was deep, allowing me to hear the splash as my blood hit the tiles below. He reached out, plucking the glass easily from my hands before taking a step back.
‘I will be watching and will work it out,’ he said, before silently leaving me alone to slump against the side.
Once my breathing settled, I set about trying to bandage up my hand. I could get Gabriel to heal it, but didn’t want to wake him, especially as he would be able to sense my lingering distress. If I told him what had taken place he would probably just laugh at me as I was unable put into words that it wasn’t so much what Adam had said, but more the intent behind it.
He had made it clear that he would be staying around and I wondered how I was going to be able to hide my true feelings from Gabriel for long. I prayed that his occasional ability to only acknowledge what he wanted to, coupled with his failure to read me properly, would be sufficient enough to conceal the depth of my fear for his friend.
I retrieved the dustpan and brush from under the sink, but was unable to find any of the broken glass on the floor. After looking around in confusion for a moment, I found it set upon the side in one piece, obviously having been fixed by Adam. I grabbed a cloth in order to clean away the only remaining evidence of the incident, my blood.
Chapter 12
Work was awful. Not only was I exhausted from my sleepless night, but every time I walked into a room, I kept expecting to find Lexi there. There were times that I saw her, laughing as she pulled the covers from the bed, or biting her lip in concentration as she counted out the medication. Then she would be gone, reminding me of what had been lost.
By the end of the shift I felt weepy and drained. Thankfully Carl agreed that I could leave thirty minutes early as I wasn’t needed for handover.
The cupboard we stored our coats and bags in was more like a closet, big enough to fit four people in at a squeeze. As I approached the door I became aware of people talking. It wasn’t unusual for that to happen, but I halted in my tracks when I heard my name being spoken. My mother had always told me that you never hear anything good when you eaves drop, but I was unable to force myself to open the door, instead choosing to hover outside listening through the gap.
‘Well, I don’t see how she can get special treatment,’ Michelle sniped. I didn’t know Michelle well as I tended to talk to the residents when at work instead of the staff. We did chat on the rare occasion though, enough for me to know that she was a single mum of a five year old boy, and that the father had done a runner years before, leaving her with nothing. She was okay, not really my cup of tea, but pleasant enough.
‘Wasn’t she close to Lexi though?’ Chloe asked. Chloe was the youngest member of our staff, being only sixteen years old. She was a sweet kid.
‘So,’ Michelle moaned. ‘It’s not as if I didn’t like Lexi too. But I don’t get a day off for it. It’s not as if her sister died or something, but Carl is treating her as if it was. It’s just not fair, and we should complain.’
Unable to prevent myself, I opened the door. ‘You have no idea what you are talking about.’
Pauline was also crammed into the tiny room. Even though I didn’t know her well, I liked her. She was a quiet woman in her forties, whose husband had died years before from a heart attack. She didn’t have any kids, though she did have eight cats which, from what I could gather, were like her babies. She averted her eyes to her hands and bit her lip.
I took a step towards Michelle. ‘Do you think that I spent the day shopping?’ My voice became loud in the small room, causing Chloe to step back with her mouth hanging open. ‘Or maybe I spent all day in bed with my boyfriend, laughing about how you lot had to work.’ My fists clenched so tightly that my nails bit into the skin.
Michelle stumbled back until her back was pressed against the shelves containing our bags. ‘I’m just saying.’
‘Maybe you should stop saying and start thinking,’ I shouted. Her wide eyes flickered to the other women in the room, before settling once more on me. She was pressed so hard against the shelf that she was leaning backwards over it.
I sighed and stepped aside to give her access out of the cloakroom. She didn’t move. Her eyes continued to flicker around the room as if she was waiting for someone else to take the lead. ‘Go,’ I told her.
She didn’t need telling twice. She edged her way around me, taking care to avoid any contact, and ran from the cloak room. Chloe gave me a wide eyed, unblinking stare, before she hastily followed, leaving me alone with Pauline.
‘That probably wasn’t the best thing to do,’ I said, collecting my bag off the shelf.
‘Maybe not, but it was nice to see her taken down a peg or two.’ I threw my bag over my shoulder and collected my coat off the hanger. ‘How are you holding up?’ Pauline asked as she scrutinised my face.
‘I’ve had better days.’ I walked from the room, leaving her to frown worriedly after me.
Once outside I began to feel weepy all over again. Determined to hold it together, I rushed to the car, blinking back the tears that threatened to overwhelm me. Driving soothed me a little and by the time I got home I figured I might be able to hold off the crying until I was in Gabriel’s arms, glad that it was Saturday and he would be at home.
Ready to be comforted, I let myself into the house only to find Adam stood waiting for me.
‘Where’s Gabriel?’ I asked through gritted teeth. I was being rude, but his open distaste for me had given me no reason to treat him with respect.
‘He was called into work. He will return at six.’
My jaw clenched so tightly, my teeth creaked. I would have three whole hours in the company of Adam when all I wanted was either, my own space, or the safe feeling of being held by Gabriel.
I stomped off to the medical cabinet, which was situated in the kitchen due to the multitude of accidents that I incurred there, and pulled out new bandages to change the damp and chemical smelling one that was hanging limply off my hand. In my temper, I managed to pull everything in the cupboard
down on me. I stared at the mess and the events of the last few days came crashing down on me.
‘Do you want me to help you with that?’ Adams question startled me and I swung round to find myself staring straight at his huge chest.
Refusing to look up at his eyes in case I was transfixed again, I shouted, ‘Do you get off on intimidating women or something? Move the hell back.’
I lifted my arms and went to push against him with all my strength. Unfortunately he chose that moment to take a step back, and I ended up pushing against thin air and stumbled forward, only to trip over his feet and land heavily on the floor, cracking my head against the tiles.
‘Damn!’ I yelled more in temper than pain, though sharp, stabbing blades radiated over my head, making me squint.
As Adam stood over me I thought the corner of his mouth twitched. ‘Let me help you with that,’ he said seriously, causing me to question whether I had really seen amusement in his face.
With effort, I sat myself up and brushed his hands away from my head. I had no intention of letting him touch me. I groaned as I tentatively touched the base of my skull only to find it wet and sticky.
‘Hold still,’ he admonished me. ‘Unless you would rather go to a doctor to have it stitched.’
As I had no intention of spending hours in a hospital waiting room, I gave in and meekly nodded for him to continue.
The tingling from his hands was very different from Gabriel’s. There was still the prickling of my skin and the feel of the skin knotting together, but it had none of the fuzziness that Gabriel had. On the many occasions that Gabriel had needed to heal me, there was always a sense of his emotions passing through into me. With Adam there was nothing, it was clinical, as if he had filtered out everything before it got to me, or maybe he didn’t have anything to send in the first place.
When he had finished he indicated to the ugly red gash on my hand that was sure to leave a scar. I nodded for him to get rid of that too. Why not, it was his fault I had cut myself anyway.
When he finished, I mumbled a thank you and stood myself back up. I felt very self-conscious and realised that I would rather be back in the cloakroom with my work colleagues than in Adam’s presence. Thinking of them brought thoughts of Lexi back into my mind and I bit my lip, trying to still the trembling of my chin.
‘Do you want to talk about it?’ he asked, distracting me from my thoughts.
‘Yes,’ I retorted. ‘Can you please stop standing so close to me, it makes me nervous.’
Adams eyes widened with surprise for a second, before returning to the usual tightness that made the corners crease.
‘I will try to refrain from unnerving you in future; however, I did not mean that.’ I could have sworn that I detected gentleness in his voice, but brushed it off as my imagination.
I flopped into the kitchen chair ready to tell him no. It was only then that I realised that not only did I want to talk, I needed to, and as he was the only person available, I was willing to take him up on his offer, intended genuinely or not.
I told him everything that had happened since first meeting the Fae. Even though he had probably heard most of it from Gabriel, he sat silently as I got everything off my chest, finishing with what had happened that day at work. He sat with his elbows on the table and his fingers pressed to his lips as I controlled my breathing, forcing the tears to stay locked inside. As I calmed, I realised with surprise that I felt better, not brilliant, or anywhere near my old self, but still, better than I had.
We sat in silence for a few minutes as I ran my hand thoughtfully around the circular coffee stain on the table. I was about to excuse myself to get changed when he spoke.
‘Why did you not ask Gabriel to take your memory of it?’
‘Didn’t he tell you? My memories refuse to stay buried.’
Adam stared at me for a few moments. ‘I could try and repress them far enough that they would not come back if you wanted.’
The idea of forgetting everything really appealed to me. To not have to see the hateful eyes of the Fae watching me in my mind’s eye or feel the pain that the image of Lexi’s lifeless face caused.
‘I can’t,’ I sighed regretfully.
‘Why not?’
‘Because I need to know what threats are out there. If I didn’t remember the Fae how would I know to avoid them?’
‘Even if it means that you will always blame yourself for her death.’
His words stung.
‘Especially because of that,’ I answered stiltedly.
‘Why do you do it?’ He leaned forward, staring intently at me, as if trying to see into my soul.
I shifted on my seat and crossed my arms across my chest, feeling very uncomfortable under his stare. I averted my eyes as I replied, ‘Do what?’
‘Why stay with him?’ He paused, as if trying to find the words. ‘Now that you know of some of the dangers there are, why not leave and protect yourself from it?’
‘Because I love him.’
Adam leaned back in his seat and studied me for long enough that I began to feel like I was in an interrogation room. I shifted in my chair once more.
‘May I ask something?’ I asked hesitantly. Although he appeared calm, I didn’t want to push my luck. He gave a slight nod of his head to signify agreement. ‘Why do you dislike me so much?’ I couldn’t believe I had actually asked him, but I was fed up with his anger, especially when I didn’t know why.
‘Why do you ask that?’ he asked, his eyes burning into mine again.
‘Because of….of…’I couldn’t keep my thoughts straight when he had me pinned with his gaze. I closed my eyes. ‘Will you stop putting your evil mojo on me, it’s not nice.’
As I turned to face the end of the table, I caught his scowl out of the corner of my eye. Most likely annoyed because I was aware of what he was doing.
‘Just admit you don’t like me.’
‘You are right. I do not.’
My head snapped up to stare at him in shock. Deep down I had expected him to lie. ‘Why?’ I asked in a small voice. Stupidly, I felt like I was going to cry again.
‘Because you are dangerous,’ he replied, relaxing into his seat as if he had just said the most normal thing in the world.
I stared at him with my jaw hung open. I would have demanded he explain, but the warm feeling signifying Gabriel would be arriving soon was growing. I stood and smoothed myself off, as if I could wipe away my sadness by straightening my clothes, and threw Adam one last withering look before forcing a smile onto my face.
Gabriel pulled the car up as I reached the door. I could already feel the lightness coming from him and as I ran towards him, I drew off his mood in order to banish the darkness within. He barely had time to close the door before I threw myself into his arms.
‘I missed you,’ I breathed before kissing him deeply. In his embrace I could almost forget the day. His smile was like a ray of sun breaking through on a stormy afternoon. He carried me up to the house with my legs wrapped around his waist.
As he lowered me down with an easy smile, I couldn’t help but realise how much I had come to depend on him. So what if he didn’t always understand what was going on in my head. Although he was an emotion reading entity, he was still essentially a member of the male species.
We kissed while Adam stood watching us unemotionally. Even though I didn’t normally indulge in public displays of affection, I didn’t care. When I drew away from Gabriel’s embrace I couldn’t help but smirk in Adams direction.
I left the men alone whilst I changed out of my work clothes. I still wanted to tell Gabriel about what had happened, but thanks to Adam that was no longer a burning need.
I wasn’t sure what to make of him. He obviously had a strong relationship with Gabriel and how he had listened to me ramble on showed that there was a decent side to him. Then again, he had openly stated that he thought I was dangerous, so maybe he was just gathering information.
I threw myself
onto the bed and groaned loudly. I felt sad, tired and my body hurt from all the tension I had been carrying around. It didn’t help that the first of my exams was in the morning and I didn’t feel at all prepared. As it had been weeks since I had last seen Beth, I made a plan to visit her when I had finished. I needed to spend some time back in normality where problems centred on money and kids.
I became aware that someone was touching my face and sat up fast enough that my head became woozy.
‘I didn’t mean to wake you.’ Gabriel sat on the edge of the bed watching me. I had fallen asleep fully clothed on top of the covers.
‘I’m glad you did,’ I said stretching. ‘I must have been more tired than I realised.’
‘How are you?’ he asked tentatively. Maybe things didn’t escape him as much as I had thought.
‘I’m okay, I think.’ As I thought about it I realised that all things considered I was hanging on fine. The bipolar was at bay, although I did feel heaviness in my heart, but that was to be expected I supposed.
‘Do you need to talk?’
I didn’t really, but I filled him in on the details about my day including what happened with Adam. His face tightened as I mentioned Adam’s comment about me being dangerous.
‘Why does he think that?’ I asked, snuggling into his arms.
‘He shouldn’t have said that.’ His words came through gritted teeth. ‘Don’t believe what he says, he is just being overprotective.’
‘But why would he think that?’
‘No reason.’ He kissed me on the head to reassure me. ‘Try not to worry; I will have a word with him.’
‘Don’t do that.’ I quickly pulled away, only able to imagine how bad it would get if Adam thought I had been telling tales on him. Gabriel sat ridged, his silence telling me that he would do it anyway. ‘Please Gabriel,’ I begged. ‘It’s not that big a deal. I just wanted to know, that’s all.’ I smiled to show that I really was okay and tried to hide my anxiety from him.
Night of the Fae (Ana Martin series) Page 13