I'm The Alpha's Mate

by Sydney Marie

  My face does not flush multiple shades of pink and red. My body does not become hot and bothered, and my head does not overthink. I merely lie and savor the tranquility.

  ***

  Sitting in one of the chairs in front of Sebastian’s desk, I watch him as he prepares for the call. This specific phone call is with a high member of my old pack, possibly the beta, or even the alpha. We are both unsure of who will answer the phone, and if it is indeed the alpha, I may just fall out of my seat. The thought of hearing the monster’s voice makes me sick to my stomach.

  Sebastian glances up at me, telling me that he is about to call. “Remember, Evangeline. You are not here.”

  I nod.

  Sebastian places the call on speaker so I can hear the conversation. My heart jerks when the ringing begins.

  Finally, an answer.

  “Yes?” An anonymous voice comes through, and my eyes shoot up to my mate

  “Hello, this is Alpha Tate. May I ask who I am speaking with?”

  “This is Alpha Kenn. I have to say I was not expecting your call. May I ask the cause of it?”

  The voice makes me suck in a sharp breath. Alpha Kenn—that has to be the man!

  “My luna was part of your pack as a child, and she is interested in learning more about the current state of the pack. Would you mind if I ask a few questions?” Sebastian says smoothly as I view the entire ordeal on the edge of my seat.

  “Shouldn’t I be speaking with your luna?” The voice taunts me.

  Unexpectedly, Sebastian motions for me, and I panic. He cannot be serious. I cannot talk with that monster. When he motions for me again, I hesitate before standing up and walking over. He grabs my hand and places me in front of the phone. His lips close to my ear.

  “Hello, this is Evangeline. Thank you for taking the time to answer my questions.” I repeat the words as Sebastian whispers them in my ear.

  I want to run away, straight out of this room. If it were not for Sebastian’s touch and him telling me what to say, I am sure that I would end the call and hide under a bed.

  “Oh, don’t you sound sweet,” the alpha coos. “Go ahead. Ask away.”

  I swallow and listen to Sebastian closely.

  “How long have you held the alpha position?”

  “Almost nine years.”

  It is not him. The alpha that torments my family held position when I was a part of the pack ten years ago. Relief takes over me, and I catch myself leaning against Sebastian.

  “And you took over after your father?” I ask.

  Sebastian reminding me that the conversation is not over.

  “No,” Alpha Kenn corrects. “I replaced my uncle.”

  “May I ask why you replaced him?”

  “You know, these questions are becoming quite specific when I believed you wanted to know about the entire pack.”

  Suddenly, I pull away from Sebastian and place both my hands on the desk.

  “Oh well. I’m sorry. I’m just a bit too curious. That’s all. Excuse my digging.”

  My voice is light and kind. Something I must have picked up from Fiona.

  “No, no. It’s alright. My uncle became a tad too unstable for the position, and it was time someone fresh took over,” he explains.

  “And you treat your members well?”

  “Only the best.”

  “And your uncle, where is he?” I ask.

  The line goes silent for a moment, and I begin to feel nervous. Have I ruined our chances?

  “Do you know my uncle, Evangeline?” the alpha questions me, and I tumble into Sebastian’s seat, sitting where he usually is, at the head of the room.

  “Well, he was the alpha when I was a part of the pack. I just want to know what he is doing now and if he still contributes?”

  “I have not seen him in years.”

  After a few more questions to cover our real reason for calling, I set the phone down and look at Sebastian. He is leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, deep in thought.

  “Well, at least we know he is nowhere near my old pack. At least he’s no longer in power,” I say softly, not wanting to disrupt the calm vibe of the room. “Did I say the right things?”

  “Yes,” he speaks up. “You did well.”

  I stand up from his chair and steadily approach him.

  “Is everything alright?”

  “Yes, I am just thinking.”

  “About?”

  His eyes find mine. “How I can nip this in the bud.”

  Sebastian never clarified if he believes me or not, or if he deems my ability to be the truth. He is taking my situation seriously, and that is enough for me. I do not care if he believes me anymore because he cares enough to help me with my problem and to help put an end to this alpha who is so desperate to end my family line.

  This is not about my ability because to him it is about my safety. All this time he has strived to protect me and to make sure I am comfortable and happy. I do not need to know if he thinks this is all crazy and insane because he cares enough to see past it.

  The bond between us grows stronger every day, pulling us closer together. The anxiety and intimidation I felt when we first met are withering away.

  After sharing my ability and the story from my grandmother with him, I am beginning to realize that he knows a significant amount about me and my past, yet he shares so little about himself.

  ***

  Later in the night, just before bed, I find myself sitting under the covers, watching him.

  “Sebastian.” I grab his attention. “Where are your parents?”

  “Why do you ask?” he questions me while shutting off the light as if he does not want to carry on with the conversation.

  “I am just curious to know more about you, about your family.”

  “My parents left. They are probably in California,” he tells me briefly.

  I do not know where California is, but it sounds magical. His parents must be fulfilled there.

  “They are rogues?”

  “Technically, yes, but they have alpha blood, so other werewolves will know that they are not just normal rogues.”

  I nod. “Do you miss them?”

  “No.”

  Sebastian gets into the bed, but I refuse to lie down.

  “Why’s that?”

  “Because I don’t.”

  I cross my arms. “And you call me frustrating.”

  I can hardly see the rolling of his eyes in the moonlight. The tones of blue and green send a romantic cast over the room, but Sebastian’s eyes keep me from fully admiring it.

  “I’m sorry, Evangeline,” he says halfheartedly. “Now please lie down and get some sleep.”

  “But I wanted to talk about your—”

  Suddenly, he pulls me down, keeping only an inch between our faces and our lips. My breath catches in my throat, and Sebastian presses his lips to mine.

  Chapter 12

  It is unique, the feeling of a kiss. Sebastian’s lips caress mine, sending an unforgettable sensation throughout my body. Something ignites inside of me. I have the opportunity to back away and push myself off him, but I cannot. Half of me is gripped on tight, not willing to put an end to the pleasant feeling on my lips and in the pit of my stomach. His hand rests on the side of my face, holding back any stray hairs from slipping down and interrupting. It is a gentle kiss, no force, just pure instinct. When it does come to an end, I find myself wanting more.

  There are no words spoken between us. Sebastian pulls me into his hold and continues to embrace me through the night. No nightmare or terror comes to me but a dream instead—a dream about my mate, about our kiss, and so much more.

  My mind will not let go of the feeling. When we connected, it felt overwhelmingly right as if my lips were only to be used by his, only to be enjoyed by him, and the other way around. I want to kiss again, to kiss every time I see his handsome face, every time he avoids my questions or every time we are lying in bed and about to drift off. Mayb
e I am addicted to the feeling.

  It is around three in the morning when a disruptive and firm knock breaks out on the other side of the bedroom door. My eyes fly open, and my heart hurdles from my chest. Sebastian’s arms tenderly let go of me as he gets up and walks to answer it. It all seems like part of my dream that the bedroom door has now become the front door.

  Who is here for a visit today? I steadily sit up and rub my knuckles into my eyes. When Sebastian opens the door enough to reveal a little, the light from the hallway trickles in.

  “Andrew, what is it?” His voice is rough, making me pay attention.

  I only hear murmurs of Andrew’s voice, not enough to make out words.

  “Who was it?”

  Sebastian glances back at me, and I straighten up.

  “I have to go,” he says, and I swiftly climb out of bed.

  “I’m coming with you.”

  “Evangeline—”

  I locate the robe and wrap it around my body.

  “I’m coming with you. Unless you are suddenly charging into battle?”

  He sighs.

  I grab Sebastian a shirt and hand it to him at the door. He takes it and lets me through. Andrew greets me, and the three of us head out of the house. The temperature outside seems to be merely freezing, so I stay close to my mate and keep my arms close to my body.

  “Where are we going?”

  “To the west border,” Andrew informs me. “There has been killing.”

  “A killing? Who was killed?” I look up at Sebastian.

  “A guard. A man I trusted.”

  Andrew explains further. “You could say he was our most valuable guard. Someone with substantial experience.”

  The moon glares down at us as the frigid breeze strokes my cheeks. The night seems darker. The stars are sparse, and gloomy clouds cover our only source of light.

  Is he here? Is he watching?

  It is quiet around us, the only significant sounds being that of our footsteps through the damp grass. My ears wait for the crack of a twig or the rustle of a bush.

  “You can go back,” Sebastian tells me.

  “No. I have a feeling that this happened because of me.”

  The leaves are wet and molded together. It had rained, but I did not hear the pattering in my sleep. The atmosphere clings to my skin cold, soggy, and thick. Andrew peers back at us, most likely confused by my words.

  The closer we get, the tighter my chest grows. Soon, we are engulfed by the trees, and other voices reach my ears. My chest hurts.

  Andrew brings us up to a group of five men, guards, as they all surround one thing: a body. Their eyes fixate on their alpha, the ringleader, before falling upon me. I can almost hear the questions floating in their heads.

  Why is she here? Who is she? What does she have to do with this? I know the answer, but it would take a while to explain.

  My eyes find the courage to eventually look towards the body, seeing dark almost brown liquid staining his skin and the grass beneath. The man is nude but covered in specific areas. The smell of death and blood is potent, yet I seem to be the only one affected by it.

  The body is mutilated. If I had known the man before, I would not be able to recognize him now. It is as if the beast has gotten him and has torn into his stomach. There are gashes along the body, deep enough to give my eyes a view of the inner workings. I cannot help but look away. It is all too gruesome, too grim.

  I grab Sebastian’s hand, letting the relaxing sensations cleanse me.

  “Evangeline, I think it is best if you go,” he tells me.

  “It’s because of me, isn’t it? Because of me, a man is dead,” I say all too loudly.

  The guards turn to me again, this time, no longer covered by solemn expressions.

  “Alright,” he says lowly. “I think you better go back to the house. Calm down and go back to bed.”

  I want to stay. I want to cling to him, but the smell of slaughter is drawing me away. This man did not deserve to die, but he did because I am here. The alpha knows where I am, and he no longer needs to ask questions.

  My feet carry me back through the trees, but I can hardly focus. Like in my dream, they seem to sway and blend, then sway apart again. My knees buckle, and I grip a near tree to steady myself. I have never seen a dead body before. The smell, the sight—it’s sickening, and even more sickening because I caused it.

  I can no longer hold it down. The contents of my stomach empty onto the forest floor. My head spins as I hunch over.

  “I did this,” I croak into the dense air.

  “This death is not your burden.” Her voice wraps around me.

  “They’re after me. I know it. They’re going to kill everyone until they get to me.”

  “Obsession is a weak man’s game.”

  I look up at the Moon Goddess. “Is he going to kill me?”

  She glows amongst my gray surroundings as if the moon is primarily focused on her.

  “Death comes to those who are unwilling to fight. You are willing, Evangeline.”

  “I-I’m not a killer. My grandmother fought back, and she ended up stabbing the man in his chest.”

  “You are not your grandmother.”

  “I’m worse,” I mutter and stand up.

  Death did not even affect the others at all. Even my mate was straight-faced. They have seen it all too many times perhaps. I, on the other hand, looked like a fool—a weak girl who had to cover her eyes from the reality in front of her, a truth that she molded with her own bare hands, finishing the work of her mother and her grandmother before her.

  I make my way out of the trees and towards the house. Now would be an excellent time to strike, would it not? I am all alone. The alpha is distracted along with many guards. Why doesn’t he just get it over with? Why does he have to kill others as if there is an army before me? Does he savor the chase?

  The house is quiet, not a creak or bump. I shrug off the robe and hang it back in its place before shutting the curtains. The door is closed, and I have a view of everything around me, not giving a chance to hidden crevices. I leave the light on, knowing that if I fall asleep, the beast will attack me. There is no place that I am safe beside my mate’s arms, and that fact is dangerous.

  I sit in the bed with my head in my hands, tempted to lie back and close my eyes. It is not worth the nightmares, especially if Sebastian is not here when I wake up sweating and pale. My eyes begin to burn from the bright artificial light. I shield it away with my hands and peer to my lap. I hate the power he has over me, for I cannot sleep alone anymore, and he probably loves it.

  Stupidly, I fall back against my pillow and stare up at the ceiling, self-sabotaging.

  “I will not fall asleep without Sebastian. I will stay awake and wait for him to come back. This man, he is making me depend on my mate,” I say out loud to keep myself awake. “He is making me weaker. I used to venture around the forest alone without a care in the world, and now, I can’t even sleep alone. I can’t sit in a room for over five minutes and not look out all of the windows. He is turning me into my mother.”

  Arguing with myself is what I have come to.

  It would be selfish to hope for Sebastian to hurry back. Am I in that dire need of him, enough to steal him away from a dead man?

  I take a deep breath and close my eyes. My thoughts whirl around in my head like a carousel ride, and I am strapped to it. I spin with the chaos until suddenly, the ride stops and I find myself slipping into a risky slumber.

  The current of warm water beats repetitively on my back. My hair sticks to my neck like a heavy blanket, and the water travels through it then down my spine. The water has washed away any trace of tears and panic from my muted face.

  My eyes watch my feet. My mind is cluttered with memories and images, none of them in the correct order. It is horrific. The beast had already killed me, and I stared as it tore apart my mate. He screamed, but I could not get to him. I was lying dead on the forest floor. He did not see
me, but I watched as he begged for his life. I watched as he was refused.

  No matter how hard I convince myself that none of it is real, tears still drop and join the powerful current rushing past me.

  I do not know what to do, so I strip off my clothes and step into the shower. It’s like seeing a limb being cut from my own body, feeling each stab and slice as the blade works through my skin, my muscle, and finally, hits my bone. I hate it. I hate every second of it. His emerald eyes continue to haunt me as they plead for mercy.

  My mind cannot seem to grasp that it did not happen, as everything felt dreadfully real. I lean against the shower wall and absently shut off the water, leaving myself cold. When I step out and change my clothes, I take a deep breath before returning to the bedroom. Mentally, I do not want to. It reminds me of the state I was in after waking.

  “Evangeline?”

  Sebastian is standing at the foot of the bed, and I inhale greatly. Sunlight pours through the windows, which wasn’t there before I took a shower.

  “Yes?”

  “When did you wake up?” he asks and sits down on the bed, crinkling the covers.

  “Um, around four. I wasn’t very tired when I got back.”

  “Four o’clock?” Sebastian repeats. “We left at three.”

  “I came back, fell asleep for a bit and woke up at four.”

  He runs a hand through his beautiful hair. Seeing him makes the images leave my mind, freeing me from their temporary chains.

  “Haven’t we been over this?”

  “Over what?”

  “The fact that you are a terrible liar.”

  I cross my arms. “Well, maybe you just excel at catching lies. It was a dream again. I couldn’t go back to sleep afterward.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t think when I told you to go back without me.”

  The concern in his eyes makes me curse myself. “You shouldn’t have to.”

  He sighs. “You have to get more sleep. I’ll stay with you—”

  “No. You probably have a lot to do with what happened. I’ll be fine. I’ll distract myself.”