by Sydney Marie
Heading to the direction the guard provided, I find my mate talking with Andrew. He notices me. Most likely seeing the depression in my expression and movements, so he must know that she was not found.
“Nothing, again,” I tell them. “The guards went even further this time.”
“Evangeline, I—”
Knowing what he is going to say, I interrupt him.
“No, it’s alright. They have been searching for days, almost two weeks. I should have seen this coming after the first search.”
These last two weeks felt more like two months. Though I am able to combat the dreams, my thoughts are littered with the alpha and what he has done to her. None of them are pleasant, and most of them leave me trembling.
It is during times like these when I wish I had more control over my mind. Throughout the past two weeks, I have managed to distract myself a couple of times, and one of them is being with Fiona. She came over to the house, and we talked more about the city, which is something she is very familiar with. Henry would have loved to join the conversation, but he was off with Bruiser.
After a while, we switched to the topic of my grandmother, which I wanted to avoid at first, but once the words left me, it felt good to get it all off my chest. Not only is Fiona skilled at conversing, but she is a keen listener as well. She did not tell me that my grandmother is going to be okay, and she did not tell me that she is probably dead. Fiona simply listened. It was a difficult conversation to have without Fiona knowing about the alpha and all the details, but she did not seem to mind.
A few days later, I spent a lot of time with Marina, who is a fascinating person, now that I have taken the time to get to know her. She has been a part of the Tate Pack for as long as she has lived, which intrigued me.
Answering my questions, Marina explained how she lost her father during an attack. He was a guard and died as a result of Alpha Tate wanting to be the strongest pack in history. This was during Sebastian’s grandfather’s time, which explains why his father attacked my old pack.
“I was angry with the alpha. I wanted him dead,” she told me. “My father died because of that man’s selfish decisions, and being around your age, I thought I couldn’t do anything about it. So I didn’t. I was actually stronger than I thought, and it fulfills me to know that you see the power in yourself. I hear things, you know, and I may not know everything, but whatever is tormenting you, I know you can handle it.”
Her words had a great effect on me. After that day, I felt more confident, more determined to fix everything. My grandmother’s disappearance has created another mountain on my path, but I cannot let her down by losing myself trying to make my way around it. There is a chance that one right move will trigger a chain reaction.
Towards the end of this two-week period, I had taken Sebastian’s advice and thought before acting upon my ideas. My greatest desire is to stop this alpha and end his obsession to pin my grandmother, my mother, and I down. The only problem is I have no clue how I am going to achieve this.
He is always watching, but I can never catch him. I can never see him. Guards have been searching the forest, and the only result of it is a spooked man and a dead one. The guard who got away did not supply us with any helpful descriptions if it was the alpha or not. Remembering my theory that people may be helping him is vital.
At first, I believed that he wanted me dead, but that does not explain why I am not yet killed. Surely he could have done it by now. His frightening dedication conveys that, so why is he holding back? Is the alpha waiting for something specific to happen? There are too many unanswered questions, and I do not know how to begin solving them.
Alpha Kenn provided me with facts that he is no longer in power and that no one has seen him in years. Maybe he can give me more. Maybe I can work with him. There is a possible chance he will not want to work against his uncle, but he did not sound too proud of him on the phone. If there is a chance that we can work together, I will take it.
With that idea fresh in mind, I hurry outside and across the pack land to where Sebastian told me he and Andrew would be. After my disappointment yesterday, this definitely gives me hope.
Instead of finding Sebastian, I come upon two rather large wolves tackling, tossing, and growling at each other. With another minute, I recognize Sebastian’s scent, telling me that he has to be one of the wolves. Their battle looks to be nothing other than a game. Coming closer, I catch myself with a laugh when one lunges towards the other but meets the patchy grass with a thud. The two notice me and put an end to their match, and when they shift back, I look away with rosy cheeks.
“Keep trying, buddy.” I hear Sebastian’s voice.
Glancing back, I see my mate clothed, walking alongside Ryker. I do not waste a second before spilling my idea.
“Sebastian.” I rush to him. “I know what I want to do about the alpha.”
Ryker leaves us and Sebastian gives me the go-ahead. “Alright, let’s hear it.”
“I want to work with Alpha Kenn if he can. He knows the most about the alpha, and I think with his help, I can put pieces together and figure this all out. Maybe I can call him and tell him about everything, and he’ll open up more. Maybe I can visit the pack since I don’t expect him to come here, and I can learn more that way.”
Sebastian looks uneasy.
“I don’t know, Evangeline. I don’t trust him.”
“But we called him before?”
“Calling is different than visiting and going by yourself is a definite no.”
Not willing to give up, I continue.
“I won’t go myself then. I can go with guards like I did when walking to my grandmother’s. They can stay with me, watch over me, and protect me if anything happens. Please, Sebastian.” I grab his hand and use the same face I use to persuade my grandmother. This one is less childish though. “Please. I need to learn more about him.”
“I’ll think about it,” he says. “In the meantime, call and ask. You don’t even know if you are welcome yet.”
“Alright, I will. Thank you.”
I wish I could read his mind. At least then, I will know what he is thinking. I cannot help but believe there is another part of him that I have yet to uncover. I know the protective, intimidating side of him, but there has to be another—the side that knows why he does not miss his parents, the side that trusts, and the side that he keeps so deeply hidden from me. That is the one I want to discover. Sadly, I tend to have too many ambitions at once. Focusing on them all is hard.
I locate the phone number on a piece of paper with other details on it. The paper is in the same corner it was before, held securely underneath the phone itself. Taking it, I also grab the phone and dial in the digits before I become too anxious. All in one breath, I hold the phone to my ear and squeeze my hands into fists at the familiar ringing sounds.
“Alpha Tate, you call again?”
I suck in a gulp of air.
“This is Evangeline, his, um, luna.”
“Oh, Evangeline. Yes, of course.” His voice picks up. “More questions?”
“No, actually. I have a favor to ask.”
“And what could that be?”
Alpha Kenn sounds like a tricky man—one who finds pleasure in playing with people, feeding off their needs. I know I am about to make myself vulnerable, giving him the power to say yes or no, but I do not have a choice at the moment.
“I need your help. It has to do with your uncle.”
“Ah. Am I about to discover why you held such interest in him?”
Almost every sentence that leaves his mouth is a question, which makes me feel things I do not know how to label.
“Yes, it is a long story. I need to know more about him—how he thought, how he acted, and what he believed. I was hoping I could come for a visit. Being an alpha and all is demanding work, but maybe you could find some time for me.”
“I suppose I could dig up some time for you and a visit. It would be lovely to meet you. Will your mate be joinin
g?”
“No. He is quite busy. It would be a few of my guards and me,” I explain, not worried by his suggestive question.
“Well, alright. When should I be expecting you?”
I did not think it would be so easy. An exchange of questions and sentences and suddenly, I have the approval to visit Alpha Kenn. All I have to do now is convince Sebastian that I will be safe and sound in the presence of said alpha, which I am expecting to be the challenging half of my conquest.
The idea came to me so abruptly that I skipped over my newly learned lesson of thinking before acting. It would have been selfish thinking but thinking overall. I am incredibly eager to leave tomorrow if all goes right, but I did not go over the concept of returning to my old pack, the pack where I was hidden away for most of my days. Obviously, no one will recognize me, but I do not want the same feelings to bury themselves in my head again, ones of loneliness and unworthiness.
Is there a chance that my parents could be there? Could they have gone back? It is a minuscule chance but one overall. Since the alpha has stayed away from the pack, maybe they saw it fit to return. It is a hopeful and nerve-racking thought that I do not know how to process. What if I see them again?
My good idea has turned sour. Am I going to continue with it? Of course.
Soon enough, night casts over me as I stand in the kitchen alone. Marina has gone home, and the moon’s eerie glow seeps around me, making the countertops look bleached. The window is wide open, and I stare out of it, though not looking for stalking eyes this time.
“Where is she?” I ask the Moon Goddess, cutting straight to the point. “I’ve been patient. She talks to you, so where is she?”
“I am afraid that I cannot share her private exchanges.”
My eyes harden on her as she tends to illuminate the room.
“What do you mean you can’t? Since when have rules been established?”
“It has always been this way. You simply did not know of others like you.”
I gawk at her. “What if she’s in danger? What is she’s dead?”
“Maybe you will feel it.”
“Maybe isn’t good enough. I feel a lot of things right now, and one of them is annoyance.”
Her beautiful eyes cease to judge me.
“Evangeline.”
Turning to the doorway, I notice Sebastian coming inside, and the Moon Goddess swiftly leaves me.
“Is everything alright?” he asks. “What are you doing down here alone?”
He must be assuming my paranoia is returning, as I was facing the window and staring out into the forest very harshly.
“I was just waiting for you to get back. I called Alpha Kenn, and he said I could visit, that we could talk about the alpha, his uncle.”
Sebastian nods absently and stands beside me, now looking out into the night sky himself.
“Is it selfish to want you to stay?”
“I’ll be safe. I’ll have the guards and protection from—”
“Not because of safety. Because I’ll simply miss you.”
Maybe it is the sudden rush of acceptance or desire through my body, but I find it difficult to look at him, and if I do, I may just act before thinking it over.
“I-I would feel the same if I were in your position. Even if it is only for a few days, I will miss you too, but it’s for the best, for time together with no worries or fea—”
In one quick and smooth motion, Sebastian tilts my head up, so my eyes have no choice but to connect with his, exposing myself. He says nothing before gently placing his lips on mine, bringing back the pleasant feelings I have only felt once before. Now somewhat familiar with the process, I too move my lips along with his, following his lead as he takes over my mind and bleeds inside of me.
It is not the same as before. This kiss, this connection is clouded with impulse and craving. What started off as soft and delicate has now turned into something hungry. I have gone from a step to a leap.
He guides me, and unexpectedly, my back bumps into something cold and hard. My palm presses against it, recognizing the surface to be the refrigerator. Sebastian pulls away only enough so that our lips barely brush against each other.
“I would do anything for you, Evangeline,” he murmurs against me. “I would kill for you.”
Maybe it is our dark surroundings, or the fire lit inside of me, but part of me is fueled by his words, ignited by the idea of a man killing for my protection. This animalistic side is being fed, and it grows.
“Really?” I mumble after another brief and aching kiss.
“Yes, easily.”
The darkness drips out of me and pools on the floor, drowning us in the vast, inky pit of manipulation. This half of me cannot be repressed anymore. She is dying to be free, to be released from the cage inside.
Sebastian’s hand grips my back and pushes my body against his, making us as close as we can be. His lips leave mine cold as he trails hot, damp kisses down my neck, making me bite the inside of my cheek to stop my mind from giving in.
“Sebastian,” I whisper. “Don’t stop,” the other half of me begs.
My head begins to feel dizzy.
“Wait, no,” I mumble, and he backs off me.
Leaning against the refrigerator, I grab on to steady myself.
“Are you alright?”
His face is full of concern, but I shake my head.
“I think I’m going to pass out.”
Immediately, he sits me down at the counter, and I press my cheek to the chilled, sleek stone, letting it refresh my spinning head. My eyes close as I greedily take in the coolness, enjoying the sensation against my warm skin.
“I’m sorry,” I say lowly. “I’m a little overwhelmed. I think.”
Chapter 15
My head leans against the window as the events from last night came back to haunt me. Everything is a little fuzzy, but I can recall my embarrassing actions quite clearly. The kissing, the intense feelings, and the headache—it was all horrifying, though I did enjoy the kissing very much. I cannot help it. The mate bond has me tightly in its hold.
The bond will surely give me a hard time these next few days, as Sebastian is painfully far from the Kenn Pack. I wonder if he will be able to sleep because I know that I will be tossing and turning for most of the dreadful night. My anxiety is already continuously reminding me of the nightmares since Sebastian will not be here to shield me from it all.
Saying goodbye was a hurdle, and I almost did not make it. This is the first time we are apart for more than half a day, and the realization of being on my own is making my foot tap rapidly. The feeling of his kiss and embrace still lingers on my skin, making me grasp onto it for as long as I can muster. It was not a quick goodbye. The entire morning felt like one giant wave-off. I was anticipating it ever since I managed to fall asleep the night before.
Sebastian insisted we take a car instead of a shifted travel, as the public roads are much safer than unclaimed forest. I had only been in a car once before when my parents dropped me off at Grandmother’s. We parked on the side of a road quite similar to the one I am on now, and they led me through the dense trees until we reached the house. I wonder where that car is now.
Taking my head off the window, I fall to my side along the back seats and try to rest my eyes. Two guards sit up front, the ones who are watching over me at the Kenn Pack, and I trust them to get us there safely.
After politely asking if that is indeed a window on the roof, I ask for the cover to be pushed back so I can stare at the sky. All of it looks like a blue blur with other white blurs sparsely splattered about, and it is not as entertaining as I hoped it to be. Maybe if it was night, maybe then I could look up at the stars and the moon.
“How long is the drive to the Kenn Pack?”
“Around three hours, Luna,” one of the guards kindly informs me.
I do not remember such a long drive from when I was a child.
We have probably been in the car for only twent
y minutes, and I already feel a longing for my mate. Hopefully, Alpha Kenn can distract me from the sad thoughts with much-needed information about his uncle. It is, after all, why I am leaving my mate in the first place so I can live with him without having a fear of being killed every day, waiting for it to happen in the pit of paranoia.
I already miss his voice and his smile, which I rarely see, and the secure feeling of having his arms wrapped around me. I cannot blame all of these feelings on the mate bond anymore, as I am very guilty.
After last night we both went upstairs, and in the fifteen minutes it took for us to get ready for bed, he must have asked me ten times if I was okay. He wanted to call the doctor, but I convinced him that I was alright. The doctor is here so often that with one more visit, he might think we are purposely trying to become ill. After that, he thought I should wait a couple of days before leaving, which also took a fair bit of convincing.
I manage to fall asleep in the car, and before I know it, a soft hand is tapping on my arm.
“Luna, we’re here.”
“I told you not to wake her up.” A whispering voice scolds the other.
“What are we supposed to do? Wait until she wakes up? That could be tomorrow.”
“I don’t know.”
My eyes flutter open, and instead of complete daylight, I see an orange sky ahead of me. The two guards hit each other when they notice me waking up.
“Are we here?” I mumble and wearily sit up.
“Yes. We just arrived in front of the alpha’s home.”
“The alpha’s home?”
The guard nods. “We got orders to arrive at this exact location.”
I blink a few times and stretch out my arms.
“Well, alright then.”
One of the guards hurries out and opens the door for me. I give him a smile before heading towards the front door. As of now, the ground feels the same, nothing too different from home. No memories are being triggered. Then again, I did not get out much as a young child.
I knock on the door and anxiously wait a few steps away. The guards are standing a couple feet behind me, giving me some much-needed space. If I vomit, they will be out of view.