by Platt, Meara
Poppy’s shoulders sagged.
He took her into his arms. “Poppy, I’m sorry. For everything.”
She rested her head against his chest and nodded. “So am I. Let’s take care of this blackmail matter and then I’m going to move in with Beast and Olivia. Perhaps I’ll go home instead. They’re still newly married, and I don’t want to impose on their privacy. They’ll be polite and say they don’t mind. But they will. Yes, I think I had better go home.”
“Poppy, no. I know I behaved like a raging arse, but surely you understand why.”
“I do. And I’m proud of the way you are protecting Lavinia and her dear friend. But I don’t think I can do this, Nathaniel. I can’t be here when Charlotte, her father, and your Society friends arrive. They won’t want me here either.”
“They won’t stay long. They’ll be gone after this weekend. I don’t want you to leave.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. “I was determined to fight for you. I wanted you to notice me. I wanted you to fall in love with me. But your world is so very different from my own. Yours is one of secrets and elegant facades. Appearances are everything, even to you. Appearances are everything, no matter who is hurt.”
“How have I hurt anyone?” He tipped her chin up so her gaze would meet his, but she refused to look him squarely in the eyes. “Surely, you can’t be siding with Andrew Gordon.”
“Of course not. This isn’t about him.”
“Yes, it is. It’s about him and my determination to pound him into dust. It’s about Charlotte and my casual dalliance with her. Look at me, Poppy. How do you think Thad or Beast or I survived the war? By behaving like gentlemen? Out on the battlefield, it is kill or be killed. Protect your own. Trust your friends to watch your back. It is no different when an enemy attempts to destroy you in your own home. I will never allow anyone to hurt my family. I will fight. I will kill to protect those I love. Had I truly been ruthless with him, Andrew Gordon would be dead. I knew what I was doing.”
“You were out of control.”
“I was fully in control. He’s alive because I allowed him to be.” He rubbed a hand across the back of his neck in frustration. “I purposely held back. I was pulling my punches. I needed to convey a message, one he would never forget. Hurt my family and I will destroy you.”
“What would you have done if he were a woman?”
He released her and took a step back to stare at her in surprise. “What? I’ve never raised a hand to any woman. Obviously, I would have responded differently. I’ve never been in a fight outside of the battlefield until today. I never even threw a punch during those stupid taproom brawls when Thad, Beast, and I were younger. How can you think I’d ever hurt a woman? Poppy, do you think I’d ever hurt you? Never you.”
She seemed to look through him rather than at him. “Let’s talk to Lavinia. She needs to be told everything before the Plimptons arrive.”
She walked to her door and opened it to let him out. “You had better change out of your clothes first,” she said quietly. “They’re bloodied. So is your face. You ought to make yourself presentable before Lord and Lady Plimpton arrive.” She glanced down at her gown. “I must do the same.”
He ignored her when she tried to show him to the door. Instead, he took her hand and marched her down the hall toward Lavinia’s chamber. “And one more thing,” he said when they reached Lavinia’s door.
She met his steady gaze.
“I’d cut out my own heart sooner than hurt you.”
But she looked at him as though he had already done irreparable harm. He had violated her trust and fallen off the pedestal she’d erected. She’d placed him on it ever since she was a little girl, and now he’d toppled off it.
He gave a curt, bitter laugh. “You want nothing to do with me anymore.”
She shook her head in denial. “I don’t know. I need time to think.”
He did not bother to mask his disappointment. Poppy may have been shocked by the beating he’d given Andrew Gordon, but she was also jealous of Charlotte and afraid the girl had some magical hold on him. How was he to convince her there had never been any magic with Charlotte?
Sighing, he rapped at Lavinia’s door.
Periwinkle gave a little bark as Lavinia’s maid opened it to allow them in.
“Nathaniel? Poppy?” His aunt took one look at them, noted the spatters of blood and the grim looks on their faces, and quickly dismissed her maid. “What’s happened?”
Nathaniel told her all.
It did not escape his notice that Lavinia reached out to grasp Poppy’s hand while he delivered the dreadful news. Nor did it escape his notice that Poppy’s gentle touch was soothing her as he dug deeper and tossed hard questions about Lady Plimpton and the young man who’d abandoned her with child.
“We were so innocent back then.” She turned to smile at Poppy. “We were young and had no experience around men. The villain utterly dazzled us. All the girls in town were half in love with him. He was a captain in the army and his regiment had settled in Wellesford for the month before shipping off. I can’t recall where they were sent. But we never saw or heard from him again.”
“Did you ever learn what happened to him?” Poppy asked.
“Oh, my dear Poppy. I can see you hope for a satisfying resolution, but there was nothing romantic or tragic about that hound. He did not die heroically. He never proclaimed his undying love for my friend. He returned to England several years later and settled in the north with his wife. He was already married when he…when he came to Wellesford.”
Poppy’s hand went to her throat. “Oh, my goodness. What a deceitful toad. I’m so sorry for Lady Plimpton.”
Lavinia sighed. “When she realized she was carrying his child, she came to me in tears. We didn’t know what to do. Finally, we confided in my father. Your grandfather, Nathaniel. He was one of the wisest, kindest men who ever lived.”
Poppy shot him a glance but quickly turned away when he returned her gaze. He knew what she was thinking. Until today, she’d thought of him the same way Lavinia had thought of his grandfather. Wise. Noble. Heroic. Now she thought of him as a barbarian. A man not worthy to be her test frog.
He turned back to Lavinia as she continued. “Your grandfather took charge at once.”
“But he hid the news from her parents. You all did.” Nathaniel gave a disapproving frown. “Don’t you think they should have been told?”
“Perhaps, but Lady Plimpton’s parents would not have treated her kindly. They called themselves devout, but they were cold and heartless. They would have beaten her and then disowned her. They would have tossed her onto the streets in disgrace and never allowed her into their home again. I suppose this is why she fell prey so easily to that young man’s flattery. Her need for love.”
Poppy’s mouth was agape.
Of course, the Farthingales would never abandon their own. The notion that parents could be cruel to their children, kick them away and forget them, was inconceivable to her. This was yet another reason he was falling in love with Poppy. She would forgive her children’s mistakes and love her grandchild whether or not legitimate.
To Poppy, a child was innocent and to be loved.
He cleared his throat. “How were you able to hide her condition?”
“My father arranged for her to join us on an extended trip, claiming I needed a companion and offering to pay all costs. Her family leaped at the offer. Their daughter traveling with an earl’s family at no expense to themselves? They were gleeful.”
Nathaniel was able to fill in the rest. “After the birth of her daughter, you returned to Wellesford and Grandfather made arrangements for Felicity to be baptized.”
Lavinia nodded. “Lady Plimpton and I were there. Quietly in the background, of course. She needed to see her daughter given a name. My father took care of the rest, made certain Felicity was cared for properly. Shortly afterward, my friend met Lord Plimpton and fell utterly and truly in love with him. He’s a go
od man.”
“But he doesn’t know her secret,” Nathaniel said with a note of disapproval.
“No, he doesn’t. They have their own children now. They’ve made a happy life for themselves. I’m not saying the situation is perfect or right. But Felicity is provided for and she was raised with care in the orphanage. Do not pass judgement on my friend, Nathaniel. We all make mistakes, some that are minor and some that will haunt us forever. It is her secret. We must respect it.”
He gave a curt nod. “I will tell them about their nephew’s forgery and nothing more. I have enough proof of this to have him locked away for the rest of his life. But I want him banished from England as soon as possible and forbidden to ever return.”
He turned to Poppy in expectation.
“I think we’re all agreed.” Poppy glanced down at her stained gown and rose to leave. “We had better change out of our ruined clothes before the Plimptons arrive.”
He went along with her and walked her back to her bedchamber, pausing at the door. There were so many things he wished to say to her, but she would listen to none of them while he stood before her with bloodied knuckles and the lingering urge to kill Andrew Gordon gleaming in his eyes.
“I’ll pay for your gown, of course,” he said. “We’ll take care of it on our return to London. Have your modiste put the charge on my account.”
She nodded.
He was about to turn away when she called to him, her voice little above a whisper. “Nathaniel, I’m glad you happened along when you did. I realize now Captain Gordon was planning something and I was about to become his next victim.” She turned to him, no longer hiding the anguish in her eyes. “I think he’d been watching the three of us while we were having our tea.”
Nathaniel’s expression hardened, but he waited for Poppy to continue with the rest of it before he responded.
“He waited for Penelope and Olivia to leave. I was the isolated doe, and he was about to move in for the kill.”
She blinked to stop the tears now gathering. “When you came along, he was busy telling me how ardently he admired me. It was a lie, of course. I suppose his intention was to lure me into an assignation. Once I was ruined, he’d have another stream of blackmail income from my parents.” She emitted a mirthless laugh. “He must have thought I was from the wealthy side of the Farthingale clan. After all, why would any of you take me into your homes if I was poor as well as common?”
“Poppy…” Is this where her doubt sprang from? Her own belief that she was not worthy of his notice?
“I’m not angry with you, Nathaniel. I’m relieved. But I’m also angry with myself for being so defenseless. What if he meant to grab me right there? I had only a book as a weapon to fight him off. Lady Cordelia’s Tuscan Adventure. That little book he could easily wrest from my hands. And then what?”
He wrapped her in his arms, not caring they were standing in the hallway and anyone could come along and see them. “Poppy, I’ll never let anyone hurt you.”
“I know. But you won’t always be around to protect me, will you? And I don’t want to be helpless and in need of anyone’s protection. I want to be able to fight off those scoundrels on my own.”
“I’ve promised you this last day as your test frog. I’ll finish my business with the Plimptons and then you and I will go out by the pond and I’ll give you some battle training. But one evening isn’t enough to make a warrior out of you. I don’t want you getting overly confident and taking risks.”
She shook her head and laughed. “Me? Too confident? I don’t think that will be a problem.”
He rubbed his thumb across her delicate cheek. “You’re shy. That is your nature. Makes it all the more special when you offer your friendship, for it is a true friendship that comes with the promise of loyalty and trust. Penelope and Goose are fortunate to have you as a friend.”
He wanted to kiss her, but his own heart had yet to calm, and the kiss would not be gentle or subdued.
Besides, he wasn’t about to start something with the Plimptons about to arrive.
Nor would he start something while she was still trembling from the earlier incident.
He was not going to lose Poppy.
First, he needed to return to his chamber to make himself presentable.
Then, he needed to rid England of that vermin, Andrew Gordon.
Next, he would deal with Charlotte and her father.
After that…
“Nathaniel,” Poppy said with an aching whisper, sliding her hand up his chest to rest it on his shoulder.
He bent his head to hers and did the very thing he’d promised himself not to do.
He kissed her.
And continued kissing her with all the love in his heart and promise in his soul.
It might not have been a perfect kiss, but it had conviction.
Chapter Twelve
Poppy’s lips were still tingling and the butterflies in her stomach had yet to die down by the time she returned to Lavinia’s quarters. Nathaniel hadn’t said a word after he’d kissed her. He was now in his study speaking to Lord and Lady Plimpton. Thad and Beast still held their vile nephew somewhere within the house. She didn’t know where they were keeping him, only that it was somewhere he could not escape. She doubted this charming manor had a dungeon. But if it did, no one deserved to inhabit it more than Captain Gordon.
Penelope and Goose had gone into town because arrangements still had to be made for the feeding and entertainment of this weekend’s guests.
“Do come in, Poppy.” Lavinia held out a hand to her. “Let’s wait this out together.”
Lavinia’s quarters consisted of several rooms. Her bedchamber, her dressing room, and a sitting room that had a lavender silk settee for herself and a matching miniature settee for Periwinkle, her devoted dog. However, Periwinkle’s favorite spot was on Lavinia’s lap, and that’s where he was comfortably perched when Poppy entered.
Lavinia motioned for Poppy to sit beside her. Periwinkle hopped onto her lap the moment she did so, rolling onto his back so that Poppy could scratch his belly. Lavinia shook her head and laughed. “He does love you best,” she said with good-natured humor.
Poppy smothered a sigh.
She adored Periwinkle.
She loved Nathaniel.
But she was still overset by the beating he’d given Andrew Gordon. Yes, the cur deserved it. But what she’d seen in Nathaniel’s eyes was so raw and savage, it had shocked her. And yet, it shouldn’t have. The Book of Love spoke of these deeply embedded feelings. The most primal was a man’s need to spread his seed. A step above that was the need to protect his family. Protect them so they would not be eaten by wolves.
Also, she was overset that Charlotte would arrive tomorrow. What if the beautiful duke’s daughter was able to rekindle Nathaniel’s passion? After all, he must have felt something for her if he’d…
She dismissed the unsettling thought and returned her attention to Lavinia.
Lavinia withdrew her lace handkerchief and dabbed it at the corners of her eyes. “What a mess this is. At least the wretched villain will be out of our lives forever.”
Poppy grunted. “He almost destroyed his aunt and doesn’t even know it. Hopefully, she will never realize we know her secret. He thought he was destroying you, that Felicity was your daughter.”
“And I will claim her as my own if word somehow gets out. I have nothing to lose while my friend risks losing everything. I will never allow it to happen.”
“The one who loses in all of this is Felicity Billings. It seems cruel not to tell her,” Poppy said. “She’s so alone in the world.”
“She won’t be any more. We’ll make her feel welcome.” Lavinia frowned thoughtfully. “Who knows if there ever will be a good moment to speak to her about this delicate subject? It isn’t up to us to tell her the truth. I know it seems harsh to you, Poppy.”
She nodded. “It does.”
“The choice is Lady Plimpton’s. I won’t have
a hand in destroying my friend’s reputation or her happy marriage.”
“No, of course not. I understand there is no easy answer. Lady Plimpton will be hurt if the truth comes out. Felicity will always wonder who she belongs to if it doesn’t.”
“Yes, but she’s a cheerful young woman with much of her life ahead of her. Who’s to say she won’t find a fine man to marry and raise a family of their own? I’m relieved she isn’t a part of this scoundrel’s schemes.”
By early evening, Andrew Gordon’s regimental commander had been contacted and arrangements made to resign his commission before getting him out of England. Beast and Thad had gone along to ensure he was put on a ship to distant shores. Their mission would take more than an evening, perhaps more than an entire day, but Beast had assured Olivia they would be back in time for the weekend party.
“I’ll miss you every moment,” he’d told Goose, earning groans from Thad, and mutters from Nathaniel about the fall of man, for Beast was obviously leg-shackled to Goose and delighted about it.
Poppy sighed and thought it splendid that such a sweeping love could exist. She wanted this with Nathaniel, but wasn’t certain it could happen. She’d felt passion in his kisses. Was this passion for her alone? Or did he feel the same when kissing other women?
The household calmed down once Thad and Beast rode off with Captain Gordon.
Nathaniel finished his business with the Plimptons and the local magistrate.
That evening, Lavinia chose to take her supper in her quarters, leaving only the five of them at the dining table. Poppy and her friends, and Pip and Nathaniel. Pip, who was seated across the table from Poppy, began to stare at her intently.
She took a sip of her leek soup, then set down her spoon. “What is it, Pip?”
He appeared distressed as he allowed his own spoon to clatter onto his soup bowl. “Was your love letter a fake? Is it true, you don’t have a beau?”