by Sue Horsford
How could I begin to explain how I felt to her? Unless she could step inside my head, she’d never be able to understand. How could I explain that there were parts of me that would always remain hidden to Paul, no matter how long we were together, but that Gabriel had already opened me up and discovered all my secrets? How could I make her see it was impossible for me to go on living with a man who only knew me on the surface, while there was a man out there who’d exposed my very core?
“You’re obsessed, that’s what it is,” said Steph. “You’ve known this man for all of five minutes and you’re willing to wreck your relationship with your sister and throw away ten years of marriage for him! For God’s sake, Faye, wake up and see this for what it is. You’ve had your fun, now call it a day and get back to real life before it’s too late!”
“I can’t go back to it just being me and Paul. I just can’t!” My voice broke.
“I’d no idea you were so unhappy with Paul,” Steph said, sounding genuinely puzzled.
“I wasn’t unhappy as such,” I said, “but for a long time now, we’ve just been plodding along, pretending to have a good marriage. Something needed to happen. I just didn’t know it.”
I sighed as I realized the truth of what I was saying. “I feel as if life with Gabriel would be a fresh start, an adventure, every day something new, something exciting. There are no adventures waiting for me with Paul and that’s what’s making me so unhappy. I don’t think I can live that life anymore.”
“Please don’t do anything rash just yet,” Steph begged me. “Give it time before you make up your mind.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’ve no intention of doing anything yet. I’m just going to let things take their course for a while.”
I got into work the next morning to find the answer phone was flashing, so I pressed play then started to open the shutters.
“Hello, this is a message for Faye. It’s Barbara. I’m in the hospital, but don’t worry. I’m fine. I just had a funny turn and they’re keeping me in for a few days to run some tests. They allow visitors from nine o’clock, which is why I’m ringing you now before Andrew arrives. I wasn’t sure what time you started work. I’ll try again same time tomorrow, eight-thirty in case you’re in.”
Well, I wasn’t usually in that early, but I would be tomorrow.
“Hello, Faye. I’m so glad to have caught you.”
“Well, I got your message. Are you okay? Why are you in hospital? Was it Andrew?”
“No, not this time. We were in Sainsbury’s on Saturday evening and I fainted. Andrew didn’t want a fuss made, but the staff insisted on calling an ambulance. They took me to the nearest hospital and when they said they were keeping me in, Andrew had me transferred to a private room. That’s why I’m phoning so early. They let visitors in all day from nine o’clock and Andrew never leaves my side.”
“He rang here the last time you were here,” I said carefully, not sure if she knew this.
“Yes, I know,” she said, “that’s why I haven’t been in touch. Andrew made me tell him your name, and he said he’d make trouble for you if I contacted you again.” She paused then said very quietly, “He really can be a very dangerous man.”
I decided not to tell her about the warnings I’d received. There was no need to make her feel guilty.
“But how have you been?” I asked. “Did he do anything when he found out where you’d been going?”
Barbara let out a small sigh. “He didn’t hurt me, but he said I wasn’t well, that I was imagining things as usual and why did I want to tell lies about him. He said you were all man haters and you’d try to turn me against him. Anyway, he’s taken an extended leave of absence from his job to ‘look after’ me and I haven’t been on my own since. Even when we go to bed, he locks all the doors so I can’t get out.” She spoke in a matter-of-fact tone and I wondered how she managed to stay sane.
“So,” she let out a small chuckle, “when I saw you on Saturday afternoon, I wanted to talk to you, but I was with Andrew so I couldn’t, then a little later, we were grocery shopping and I’m afraid something just came over me.”
Realization dawned. “Barbara! You faked it!”
“I can’t stand this anymore, Faye. At least before I had some freedom, but now, I have no life at all. Then I saw you with…was it a friend you were with, dear?”
I smiled to myself. She could tell Gabriel wasn’t my husband. It must be obvious he was way out of my league.
“Yes, he’s my friend,” I said.
Barbara was silent for a long moment and I wondered if she was still there, then she said, “I need to get away from Andrew. How do I go about getting into one of those refuge places you told me about? Do I need to book in advance?”
I stifled a smile. “It’s not really like that, Barbara. It’s not like getting a hotel room. It’s done on a day-to-day basis. If you want to go today, I can ring around and try to find you a place.”
“Oh…I’m not sure whether I want to go today, but can I ring you when I’m ready?”
“Of course you can. Have you got a pen?” It wasn’t the professional thing to do, and Kay would have a fit if she knew, but I gave Barbara my personal mobile number.
“Thank you, dear. I have to go now. I’ll be in touch.”
The next morning, Kay was back at work. “How’s everything been?” she wanted to know. “Anything I should know about?”
“No,” I lied.
The last thing I needed was Kay knowing about Andrew. She’d have me filling out incident reports for the rest of the day.
I made her a coffee, then Lisa, who was going through the post, called out, “Who’s Gabriel Scott, Faye?”
The unexpected sound of his name made me start, and trying to still my trembling hands, I took the envelope Lisa was holding out to me. The letter was addressed to Mr. Gabriel Scott, c/o Faye.
“Oh, I know what it is,” I lied, putting the envelope into my handbag where it lurked for the rest of the day.
Later on, I told Steph, “I’ve no idea who it could be from,” I said. “Who knows I know Gabriel, and why send him something through me? Does someone know what’s going on with us? Is this some kind of warning or even blackmail?”
“Andrew?”
I shrugged. The same thought had occurred to me and at first I’d tried to dismiss it. After all, how would he know anything about my private life? Then I remembered that he knew my surname and he knew my car. What else might he know?
“Open it,” Steph said. “I can’t believe you haven’t already.”
“I couldn’t,” I said, aghast at the thought.
“Why ever not?”
“It’s addressed to Gabriel,” I said, earning myself a look of scorn from Steph.
As soon as I could, I phoned Gabriel and told him I needed to see him.
“What is it, sweetheart?”
“I’ll show you after work,” I said. “Can you meet me at the car park by the beach?”
He was there before me, waiting in his car. I slid into the passenger seat, and he leaned across and gave me a lingering kiss on the lips, one hand cupping my breast, thumb tracing the outline of my nipple. A shiver of desire ran through me, but I forced myself to concentrate on the matter at hand and reached into my handbag and took out the letter.
“This arrived at the center for you this morning,” I said, handing it to him.
Gabriel frowned. He ran his thumb over the seal. “You haven’t opened it.”
“It wasn’t addressed to me,” I said.
Gabriel nodded. He opened the envelope, removed the single sheet of paper that was inside and read it in silence, then he carefully folded the letter and put it into his pocket.
“Well?” I said.
“Well, what?”
“Aren’t you going to tell me what that was?” I asked in astonishment.
“It’s nothing to do with you,” he said harshly. Then, at the hurt expression on my face, his tone softened. �
��I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know it must be driving you mad, but be a good girl and forget about it and trust me when I say it’s better you don’t know.”
“Is it something bad, then?”
“Faye,” he said in a warning tone, raising his eyebrows in a way that told me I’d better do as I was told.
“Sorry, Sir,” I said, dropping my gaze to my feet.
Gabriel sighed. “Look at me.”
I raised my head to see him staring at me intently.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
“With my life.”
“Really?” One side of Gabriel’s mouth lifted in an amused smile. “Well, I’ll do my best not to let you down on that score, my pet. Remember what I told you. I never do anything without a good reason.”
I nodded.
“Well, I have an excellent reason for not telling you what’s in this letter. That should be enough for you.”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Come here, then.” He pulled me toward him so I was straddling his lap. “How long have we got?”
“Not long,” I said. “I need to get home. My boss has asked me to work late for her tomorrow night and Paul might get suspicious if I’m out late tonight, as well.”
Gabriel frowned. “What time are you working till tomorrow?”
“Eight o’clock.”
“Have there been any more incidents to worry you?”
“No, everything’s been very quiet. I spoke to the lady in question this morning, actually. She’s in hospital, but she’s okay.”
“Good,” said Gabriel. “It’s very sweet that you care about your clients, but I don’t want you getting too involved, do you hear me?”
“Yes, Sir,” I murmured blissfully. I was touched by his concern. Still, it was probably best not to tell him I’d given Barbara my mobile number.
The following evening I worked late with Kate, something I soon came to regret as she had only one topic of conversation at the moment—her wonderful new boyfriend. As she was telling me what a lovely time she’d had on Saturday when he’d taken her to lunch, I amused myself by wondering what she’d say if I told her about my Saturday lunch, kneeling at Gabriel’s feet.
After a seemingly endless night with no visitors or callers, we locked up and left just before eight. Kate cycled to work, so I waved her off and made my way to my car. As I was walking, I had the uncomfortable sensation that I was being watched.
I rummaged through my bag for my car key, making a mental note to have it ready next time I was on a late night, then found it only to drop it on the ground. I bent to retrieve it, then a footstep sounded on the pavement behind me, and I straightened, and spun around, holding the key in front of me like a knife.
“What are you planning to do?” asked Gabriel. “Unlock me to death? If you’re going to use your key as a weapon, sweetheart, remind me to show you how to hold it.”
I let out the breath I’d been holding. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“Excuse me?” said Gabriel. “Is that how you talk to your Master?”
“I’m sorry, you gave me a fright. Why are you here?”
“I was just passing,” said Gabriel implausibly, “and I thought I’d come and make sure you were okay.”
“I’m fine,” I said, bemused.
“Well, that’s good,” said Gabriel. “I won’t kiss you here in the street since anybody could be watching, but just so you know, I want to bend you over the bonnet of your car, rip off your panties and fuck you so hard you’ll forget your own name.”
“I almost wish you would,” I breathed. “Not even you would dare to do that.”
Gabriel’s eyes gleamed. “It’s a date, then,” he said. “Not here, we’d probably get arrested. But make no mistake, I’ll find somewhere, and one evening soon you will find yourself spread-eagled over your car.”
At my wide-eyed look, he laughed then stepped close to me and said in my ear, “Don’t ever dare me, sweetheart. I always carry out my promises. Now get that gorgeous ass in your car before I lose control and take you right now.”
I got in quickly and Gabriel leaned in at the window and said wickedly, “See you at the party, warrior woman.”
Chapter Eleven
“I won’t be able to go tonight. I don’t feel very well,” Paul said, frowning in an effort to appear disappointed.
“Don’t worry,” I said, “I’ll go with Ginny and Gabriel.”
I phoned Ginny to tell her there’d been a change of plan and to suggest we get a taxi together as I didn’t fancy turning up on my own, but she told me she was going to break the habit of a lifetime and take her turn to drive.
“It saves all that messing around trying to get a taxi on Saturday night,” she said. “I’ll pick Gabriel up first then we’ll pick you up around seven-thirty.”
I was in the bedroom applying my lipstick when the doorbell rang, and I shouted to Paul to answer it. I took one last look in the mirror and had to admit I did make a great Boudicca. My white cotton shift dress came to just above my knees, which was probably a little shorter than Boudicca wore hers, but the effect I was going for was sexy rather than authentic. I’d spent last night edging the tunic with a strip of gold embroidery, and I’d made a short woolen cloak that I’d fastened with a gold brooch. The gold gladiator sandals I’d bought for my holiday last year were as inauthentic as the tunic, but what the hell. I completed my outfit with a gold headband, leather cuffs on my wrists and a gold bangle in the shape of a snake on my upper arm plus, of course, my torque.
I walked down the stairs to see both Paul and Gabriel standing in the hall, watching me. Paul gave a whistle and Gabriel’s eyes gleamed in appreciation.
Seeing them standing so close to each other, I couldn’t help but make comparisons. Gabriel was only two inches taller than Paul, but he somehow managed to make him seem small and insignificant. While Paul was slobbing about in a tracksuit that had seen much better days, Gabriel was every inch the eighteenth-century rake in a white blouson shirt, open at the neck, with tan breeches and black knee-high leather riding boots, which showed off his long legs and muscled thighs to perfection.
I kissed my husband goodbye, told him not to wait up and went with Gabriel to where Ginny was waiting for us in her Fiat, outshining everyone as Nell Gwynne with a tightly laced bodice over a white peasant blouse.
“You look fabulous,” I told her, squeezing myself into the back seat.
“Thanks, sis. Mind my basket of oranges and Gabe’s hat. Don’t you think Gabe looks hot in that get-up?”
“Oh, yeah, very handsome.”
We arrived at Fluff’s and Gabriel put on a navy frock coat and a black three-cornered hat. Not everyone could carry off a three-cornered hat, but Gabriel did it with aplomb.
Fluff opened the door to us dressed as Cleopatra, her kohl-rimmed eyes widening as she took in the vision that was Gabriel. “Come in,” she said. “Lovely to meet you, Gabriel. I like your hair like that, Faye. Where’s your husband?”
“He sends his apologies,” I told her. “Man flu.”
“Oh, well, it seems you’ll have two women to keep happy then, Gabriel.”
Gabriel got a white wine for me, a lemonade for Ginny and a Peroni for himself, then Ginny and I squeezed onto the end of a sofa and Gabriel perched himself on the arm.
As we sipped our drinks and looked around us at our weird and wonderful fellow guests, a beautiful young woman with blonde hair down to her waist sashayed by, wearing nothing but a flesh-colored body suit.
She saw us gawping and flashed us a smile. “Lady Godiva,” she said.
“Was she actually a real character from history?” I asked Gabriel.
“Who cares?” he said, grinning.
“So, you fancy her, do you?” said Ginny, a dangerous glint in her eye.
“Not at all. I was simply admiring her chutzpah.”
“Well you’re staring hard enough at it,” she sneered.
Gabriel made a face at me over
her head, but I felt mean mocking my sister and didn’t join in. Besides, I didn’t like him admiring other women any more than Ginny did.
It was difficult to reconcile this Gabriel with the Gabriel who had the power to make me feel I was the only woman in the world. Sometimes, reality intruded into my fantasy world quite rudely and this was one of those times. I took a long swallow of my drink. Perhaps getting drunk was the answer.
But Ginny had quite a different idea. A stocky young man had come in a kilt with half his face painted blue. Ginny got up and went over to him.
“You’ve come as Braveheart, haven’t you?” she said, peeping up at him with wide eyes. “You look fantastic, the image of Mel Gibson.”
“Thanks. Your costume’s great too,” he said, openly admiring her cleavage.
Ginny glanced back at Gabriel to see if her actions were having the desired effect, but he simply looked amused.
“If I behaved like a total cad, do you think Ginny might go off me?” he said.
“Do you mean you’re not behaving like a total cad already?” I said.
Gabriel frowned. “Would you excuse me for five minutes?” he said politely.
He sauntered over to where Lady Godiva was chatting with a lady in medieval dress.
He apologized for interrupting their conversation then turned the full force of his charm on Lady Godiva until the medieval lady made her excuses and slipped away.
Ginny caught sight of them and, although her smile never wavered, I could tell she was livid.
“Come and dance,” she said to William Wallace, who looked as if he couldn’t believe his luck as she rubbed herself up against him.
Gabriel seemed not to have noticed. He was so deep in conversation with Lady Godiva that he didn’t even spare them a glance.
I tried not to care. I told myself he was just playing a part for Ginny’s benefit, but suddenly I couldn’t watch anymore.
I went out into the kitchen and helped myself to another glass of wine and went out into the back garden where the smokers were congregating, wanting to put as much distance as possible between myself and Gabriel.