by Nina Croft
His words were broken off as the office door was flung open from outside. Julia stood in the doorway and he had to fight back the urge to go to her. She appeared tired, no makeup and dark circles under her eyes. He’d done this to her. She took a step forward, halting abruptly as she came up against the barrier of the spell. “What’s going on? Why can’t I get in?”
“Magic,” Daniel said.
She stared between the two of them, her gaze fixing on Bastian’s cheek where Daniel had cut him. “You’re hurt.”
“It’s nothing.” He had to get out of there before he gave in to the urge to hold her one more time. He wanted to with a desperation he had never felt before, so his feet almost took the steps of their own accord and he had to fix them in place. “I’m out of here.”
“Wait,” Daniel said. “Stay. Talk to us. There are things Julia needs to tell you. And you can be of help—we need someone to teach us what there is in the world, how we can protect ourselves from whatever is coming after us. Someone who can help the pack, who—”
“You think I would help the pack? I would kill you all in a heartbeat. The only reason I didn’t kill you today is because of Julia. Call it my going-away present to your sister. Otherwise, I would have sliced your head from your neck without a second thought.” He forced himself to turn back to Julia. “Those scars you saw on my back? They were werewolf scars. Done just after they murdered my wife.”
She swallowed. “You’re a werewolf?”
“No,” he growled the word. “I’m something else. Something you don’t want to know about, something that won’t fit in that nice, normal world you crave so much.”
“The pack killed my sister as well,” Daniel said. “But that doesn’t mean we are all evil. Stay—help us make things better. Julia—”
“Doesn’t it?” But he knew as he spoke the words that they weren’t all evil. That was the real reason he hadn’t killed Daniel, because he had sensed the innate goodness in the man. It was also why Dante’s master wanted him dead. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his scalp.
“Bastian, stay. Talk to me. I have things to say.” She tried to take a step forward but came up against the invisible barrier and swore. “I’m not what you think. You have to listen to me.”
He couldn’t stay or his resolve would weaken. “I don’t have to do anything. I’m leaving.” He strode toward the door at the rear of the room. Daniel watched him but didn’t say anything further. He paused at the door and turned back to where Julia stood, her palm pressed against the invisible barrier. He stared at her for a long second and then nodded. “Be good,” he said.
Chapter Sixteen
Julia stumbled into the office as the invisible wall she’d been pressing against vanished as though it had never existed. After righting herself, she hurried across the room and opened the far door, but she knew it was too late. He was gone.
She slammed the door and rested her cheek against the cool wood.
When Daniel had called her to say that Bastian was here, she’d almost collapsed with relief. It had been the five longest days of her life. She’d been back to the apartment every day but presumably he’d spoken to the concierge and he had told her each time that Bastian wasn’t home.
She had paused for one brief moment to wonder why he was seeing Daniel and not her, but only for a moment. Just the chance to see him, speak to him, tell him she…
So much for that idea.
What the hell was going on?
Daniel had an empty glass in his hand. He turned back to the cabinet, poured himself another and one for her, and brought it over. It was whiskey. She hated whiskey. But she took it anyway.
“What happened? Why did Bastian come to see you?”
He swallowed the drink in one go. “He came here to kill me.”
“What?” She plonked herself down on the sofa and stared at him. “Is he all right? Did you hurt him?”
Daniel let out a short, sharp laugh. “You have got it bad. Your only brother tells you someone came here to kill him and you’re worried about him and not me.”
“You’re a werewolf. You can take care of yourself.”
“At least you can say the word now. And actually, if he hadn’t changed his mind, I’d be dead.” He came and sat down beside her, squeezed her hand. “He’s not human, Julia.”
“What?”
“Your boyfriend is not human. I don’t know what he is, but he’s not normal.”
She already come to that conclusion, maybe she’d always sensed it. But not human? She remembered what he’d said. “Could he be a werewolf? Could he be lying about it? He has these scars.”
“No. We would sense it if he was wolf. He said he’s a warlock. I’m guessing that prevented the change.”
“And he came here to kill you?”
“So he said. And he came armed with a silver knife.”
Shock hit her. “So he knows what you are?” Daniel nodded. “Does he know what I am?”
“No. He told me to get you away from this world. I think that’s why he didn’t go through with it. He didn’t want to hurt you.”
But he’d already hurt her. He’d broken her heart. Now he had a moral obligation to mend it.
“He stopped me with a word—I was helpless.”
Nausea rolled through her, rising up bitter in her throat and she took a gulp of her drink and swallowed it down. Daniel had come so close to death, and she’d brought it on him. Lissa would have been devastated. “How?”
“You felt what he did at the door.”
“Wow, magic.” But the thoughts were churning in her head and she really didn’t like the conclusions she was coming to. “Why did he want you dead?”
“I think it was just a job. Someone wanted me out of the way because I refused to cooperate with them. But hell, I don’t even know who.”
“So he’s some sort of assassin?”
“Maybe.” He took a moment as if deciding whether to tell her something. “You know I’ve been having guards protect Lissa?”
“Yeah? I take it you’re going to tell me why.”
“A month or so back, I was approached by someone. The approach actually came through your friend Colin. Apparently, there’s an organization that Ethan used to deal with. Fights like Bastian was in but totally underground and for Supes only.” He looked away for a second. “Fights to the death.”
“Jesus.” Was Bastian involved in something like that? She didn’t believe he could be.
“Ethan used to…provide wolves. From what Joe has told me, they weren’t always voluntary. I said no. They came back a couple of times. There were other things Ethan was involved in—things I don’t even want to think about. I told them to piss off. They told me I’d be sorry and they’d make sure the next Alpha was more amenable. I guess this is their way of trying to make that happen.”
“Is Lissa in real danger?”
“Not if you don’t encourage her to go out without bodyguards.”
A flash of anger pierced through the fog of self-pity. “Maybe if you’d told me what was going on, I might have been more careful.”
He gave her a hard look. “Would you have listened? Every time I’ve tried to talk to you about the pack you’ve closed me down or just walked away.”
He was right. She’d had her head so firmly in the sand she probably wouldn’t have heard him anyway. Time for that to change.
Bastian was some sort of warlock, and he’d been sent to kill Daniel. The question was, had that been the case all along? Had he used her as a means of getting close to his target? How could it be anything else?
Pain stabbed her in the chest, and her eyes stung. Had it all been a lie? She remembered his lovemaking the last time they had met at his apartment. He’d started out so cold and distant, but in the end, he hadn’t been able to hold himself apart from her, and she’d experienced a closeness she’d never come near to with any other person.
And she’d been sure he felt the same.
She�
��d left, given him space because she had the impression he was battling some inner demons and knew he had to work it out for himself. She’d been prepared to give him some time, but her hope had been slowly eroded over the last five days. She’d needed to see him. Even Leloo had whined and growled at her. Julia knew she missed him as well despite their strange love-hate relationship.
“Do you think it was all a set up? The moving in next door to me, the dates, the being nice? Was it all a set up just to get to you?”
Something flashed in his eyes. Pity maybe. She didn’t want to be pitied. She’d had it right up to the top and overflowing with pity. She wasn’t pitiable. Well, maybe a little bit. But she was working through that, getting there.
“I honestly don’t know for sure.”
“But you think?”
“It does seem a huge coincidence.”
“Yeah, and why would a man like that go for someone like me?”
He studied her for a long time. “Because you’re beautiful inside and out. And maybe underneath, that’s what Sebastian really wants, maybe even needs.”
“Aw, thanks, brother. But you know what I mean.” She chewed on her lower lip. “He told me he’d made a bet with his old girlfriend, Melanie, that he could get a good woman to say ‘I love you.’”
“The bastard.”
“How does that tie in with trying to kill you? Was he lying?” It had held a ring of truth. God, she didn’t know anything anymore, except she missed him and needed him and he’d been using her. Her stomach was in knots.
Plus, she was a werewolf and he hated werewolves, really hated them. They’d killed his wife and she hadn’t even known he’d been married. When? How long ago? Had it been Ethan? And did it really matter? Even if she somehow managed to get him to see her, talk to her, she would have to tell him because there could be no more secrets between them and then he would hate her as well.
“Life sucks,” she muttered and heaved a huge sigh. “But at least you’re still alive. Lissa would have killed me if my boyfriend—ex-boyfriend—had chopped your head off.”
“I wouldn’t have been too pleased either.”
Another huge sigh. “What can I do?”
“You’re not asking me for advice, are you?”
“I know you’re my brother and it’s really lame, but I’m desperate here.”
“Thanks.” He rubbed his hand over his face and pressed his eyeballs. Signs he was stressed. “Let’s think about the facts.”
“Good plan.”
“One—he didn’t do it. He could have killed me and didn’t.”
“That’s a positive one, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, well obviously I think so. Two—he didn’t do it because of you.”
Something relaxed inside her, and she was pretty sure Leloo wagged her tail. “So he does like me a little bit?”
“I’m guessing more than a little bit.”
“I’m sensing a ‘but’ coming on here.”
“Well, the ‘but’ is quite positive as well. He’s leaving you because he thinks you’re a good woman.”
“How deluded can you get?”
“Exactly. And either he believes he doesn’t deserve a good woman, or he believes a good woman could never care for a man like him.”
She suspected Daniel knew all about how that felt. He’d done his best to stay away from Lissa. “But I’m not a good woman.”
“No, and that takes us to fact three—you’re a werewolf and he doesn’t know it.”
“So I’m either a good woman, in which case I’m too good for him and I’m fucked. Or I’m an evil werewolf and he hates me and I’m fucked. Either way I’m fucked. Any more facts?”
“He’s good for you.”
“He is?”
“He’s made you accept what you are. You’ve changed since you met him, even before you knew he was linked to this world.”
It was true. She no longer flinched when Leloo made her presence known. Leloo wagged her tail as if to prove the point. It was full moon tomorrow and even through her misery, she felt a thrill of anticipation. Tomorrow, she would run with the pack for the first time. “What do I do?”
“You show him that werewolves aren’t all bad. You show him being good and being wolf aren’t mutually exclusive.”
Something occurred to her. “Do you like him? Does your wolf like him?”
A frown developed between his eyes. “I don’t know. Sometimes it’s as though Wolf is warning me; sometimes there’s nothing. It’s almost like he’s two different people.”
That so mirrored the way Julia felt that she sat in silence for a minute, thinking it over. “That’s how I feel. Sometimes Leloo snarls at me like I’m in danger when he’s near. Other times, she wags her tail, like she loves him.”
“I think he’s conflicted. I think he’s been alone too long and what he needs is—”
“The love of a good woman.”
“Exactly. Plus, I think we need him. The pack needs him. We’re in the dark about so many things, and I think he could help us.”
“Well, glad you’re thinking about your baby sister’s happiness in all of this.”
“I think you can be happy. And I was worried I’d maybe never say that.”
“All I need to do now is find him.”
Daniel picked up his cell from the coffee table and punched in a number. “Joe, where is he?”
He listened for a minute, closed off the call, and turned back to her. “He’s wandering around the streets of London in an aimless manner.”
“You have someone following him?” She didn’t know whether to be shocked or pleased.
“Yes. Joe. He’ll let us know if he stops or does anything interesting.”
“Good, I think.” She was going to face him, tell him the truth and if he didn’t wave his wand or whatever and turn her into a toad, she was somehow going to convince him that she could be what he needed.
Maybe she could use some help with that.
“Is Lissa at home?”
He looked wary. “Yes.”
“Well, give her a call. Tell her I’m on my way and to get her and her bodyguards ready because we’re going shopping.” She jumped to her feet. “And if you hear anything about Bastian, you let me know.”
…
Bastian had no clue where he was going and why he was going there. Snow started to fall as he walked, but he didn’t feel the cold.
Dante remained silent and that nagged at his mind a little. He was no doubt lying low and building up his strength.
He didn’t need to return home. He had everything he required. Perhaps his subconscious had known all along that it would come to this. He was going back to where it all started. But not quite yet. The spell had the greatest chance of succeeding if he was as close to the beginning in space and time as he could make it.
In the meantime, he walked, ignoring the flakes that settled in his hair and his shoulders.
Julia would be all right. Her brother would keep her from being contaminated by the filth of this world. He’d done so up to now. And one day, she would no doubt find that nice, normal man and…
He stopped the thought—didn’t want to go there. And it wouldn’t matter because he wouldn’t be here.
This had always been an option. One he ignored because he wanted to live. Now he admitted there was something more important to him than life—Julia. Christ, it was ironic. He’d set out to make her say “I love you.” Instead he’d fallen so deeply in love with her that he would never recover. Maybe it was time he admitted it to himself.
I love Julia Melville.
The words sounded good in his head. He just regretted that he would never say them to her. But it was better this way. And he wouldn’t regret it. Everything had to come to an end. Knowing that Julia would be safe made the sacrifice worthwhile.
He walked for hours. As the sun was going down and all the lights came on around him, his footsteps slowed.
It wasn’t long until Christm
as and the streets of London twinkled with fairy lights. They seemed somehow inappropriate, but then the only time he’d celebrated Christmas was with his wife. He’d bet Julia loved Christmas. He shook himself and looked around, working out where he was. Then he spun on his heel and headed back toward where he’d parked the car. It was time to go.
He drove out of the city, leaving the bright lights behind, and turned the car to the north. He didn’t think as he drove, keeping his mind clear, emptying it of everything. After an hour, he turned off the main road and down a smaller lane and finally pulled into the visitor’s car park of Fairston Forest.
This forest had been old a thousand years ago. Night had fallen, though the sky to the east glowed orange with the lights from the city. It never got totally dark here, not as it had in his youth. Not like it had two hundred years ago when he’d last been in this place.
As he made his way, weaving between the giant oaks, he felt Dante stirring inside him. He shut him down as much as he could and picked up his pace. It took fifteen minutes to reach the clearing.
There was magic here, old magic. He was presuming that was what had kept the place secret from humans all these years. It hummed through his mind, waking something deep in his soul. He was guessing that before the werewolves, other things had lived here. Beings like his father perhaps, before the world changed and they drew back into their own lands.
It hadn’t changed at all since that other time and if he closed his eyes, he could see his wife’s torn and broken body. Hear the sobs of his daughter. His head filled with the fumes from the burning torches and the scent of fresh blood. His muscles tensed as though readying themselves for the claws to lay open his back.
Don’t do this.
They were the first words that Dante had spoken since the meeting with Daniel. Bastian ignored them. Studying the clearing, he tried to work out in his mind exactly where he had been standing. He’d spent so long trying to blank this from his mind, and now he dredged it back up from the depths.
Come on, Sebastian, talk to me. I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye, but surely we can come to some agreement.
They’d tied him between two wooden pillars just off to the center, facing the great carved throne where the asshole of an Alpha had sat like he was someone important instead of a depraved monster. He’d lounged there while they had slaughtered Sophie, tearing out her throat. At least it had been a quick death.