As Apollo entered the antiseptic halls of sickbay, he passed by a sleeping Baltar. and made a mental note to check on him before departing. First, he would see Starbuck.
Apollo was desperate to know if he'd gotten his friend back in time. While he waited outside the operating theater, he was joined by Cassie. Her presence brought back everything Starbuck had said to him on the blood-soaked floor of the cavern that had come close to being their tomb.
They were soon joined by Dalton. The three stood arm in arm, not speaking.
The doctor finally came to tell them the outcome of the surgery. Starbuck was in serious condition, but he had a good chance.
Cassie volunteered to stay by Starbuck's bedside. When he was alone with Dalton, Apollo finally had words of comfort that didn't seem forced or empty. "We must believe he'll pull through. Remember that your father has already died once. He wouldn't have come back unless there was a reason."
They hugged and Dalton allowed herself to cry. She insisted on staying behind to help Cassie on the long watch.
On the way out of the hospital, Apollo remembered to stop by Baltar's room. He had no intention of waking the man from what had appeared his first peaceful slumber in months, but Baltar was already awake.
"I was hoping you'd stop by," said Baltar. "News travels fast here. Seems as if you'll have to bear the burden of being a hero again!"
"Tell me about you, Baltar."
"Gladly! That's my favorite subject. The doctor showed me a chart of my brain scans. I owe you for that, Apollo, the way they are sharing information with me."
"I'll check them out myself," Apollo promised, "but give me a thumbnail summary."
"The reason they couldn't find anything physical, like a tumor, was because the problem was not where they looked. There is no obvious damage to my brain!"
"Are you glad of that or does this mean you've finally gone off the deep end?"
"Why don't we bring the doctor in at this point?" Baltar suggested. "She's not a bad sort."
Apollo consented and made a call on his comlink.
The doctor was a stunning brunette named Kim. And she was all business.
"The problem lies with his entire brain," she said.
"Sounds like a bad joke, doesn't it?" Baltar asked.
"I'm not following you," said Apollo.
The doctor explained. "It turns out that Baltar's brain is not exactly his original brain."
Baltar helped her out. "You see, my brain was genetically engineered by the Cylons. It resembles my original brain to the last detail, with all my memories, personality and emotions intact. But there is one important difference. It now acts as a transmitter."
"Oh, no," said Apollo.
"Oh, yes. The Cylons see everything I see. They know where I am and what I'm doing. More important, they know what you are doing! That's how they've always known where we are and how to find us!"
Apollo had to sit down. Even for him, it was too much to absorb right away. The doctor picked up the thread of this new nightmare.
"Baltar couldn't have been aware of this," she insisted. "They must have operated on him when he was injured and he never knew the difference."
"At least my nightmares and headaches make some kind of sense now that I know my subconscious has been the playground of so much alien stuff! I'm basically a camera and communications device for them to keep tabs on your fleet. Distorted data from their world bleeding through into my mind is a sick bonus, if we can figure out how to make use of it!"
"You've got a good point there," Apollo agreed.
"The dreams aren't really dreams at all! I can't tell you what a relief it is to find out that I'm not actually insane!"
"Well, that is still a matter of opinion," said the doctor, proving that she had a sense of humor as well as a pleasant bedside manner.
Apollo let it all sink in. "Have you been able to decipher any of these messages?"
Baltar nodded. "Enough to reach one conclusion. We are in serious trouble if we don't leave Paradis as soon as possible. The Cylons have evolved, and we have no idea into what! The only reason they haven't attacked is because they've been in a civil war between the biological Cylons and the three-brain technological Cylons. It's only a matter of time before they seek us out again; and they may be far superior to what we've faced before!"
"You've given me a lot to think about," said Apollo as he took his leave.
Although Baltar had not been kept in the dark, Apollo insisted on speaking to the doctor alone. He had one question. "Can you operate and repair the problem?"
She had one answer: If we operate, Baltar will die. That is the only way we can terminate transmissions to the Cylons!"
Chapter Twenty-Two
After Apollo left the sick bay, Baltar has another visitor. Cassie stopped by to check on him, as she did with so many of the patients in the bay. He did not look well.
"Can I get you something, Baltar?" she said with concern.
He smiled at that, and the creases of pain in his face relaxed a bit.
"No. Thank you, Cassie. But perhaps I can give you something."
Cassie raised an eyebrow, clearly interested if inherently suspicious of anything that Baltar volunteered. But "Oh?" was all she said.
Baltar did something strange then. He took Cassie's hand in both of his. "Listen, my dear, I have nothing but your best wishes at heart. You have been good to me. Your dear friend Apollo has been good to me as well. And now I wish to return the favor."
Cassie was taken by the man's sincerity.
"I know, Cassie," he said softly, "that there are many complications in your life. I have seen that both Apollo and the devil-may-care Starbuck have cherished places in your heart. And I have seen you with your infant son in arm, buttressed by his love and exuding self-contentment. You seem to me to be happiest in those moments."
Cassie let him continue, wondering where this would lead.
"You may feel that your baby needs a good, strong father, like Apollo or his friend. But let me tell you something: your baby is special. The boy is, perhaps, more than he seems. And perhaps a bit less."
"What do you mean, Baltar?" Cassie asked, dreading what was about to come but knowing the words he was about to speak.
"Cassie… are you certain that Apollo is the father of your child?"
Cassie jerked back, withdrawing her hand from his. But she was not inclined to lie now, either to Baltar or to herself.
"No—I… I'm not," she said with a sigh. "By the Lords, I wish I could say for certain, but I do not really know. Judging by Apollo's reactions, I'd say he doesn't think so. Oh, he's loving and supportive, of course. And since I told him he was the father, he's too much of a gentleman to disavow the baby. I've never really given him the opportunity to, I guess.
"But why would you bring this up?"
"Because your child is special. I see great things for him ahead."
Baltar lifted his head up and raised his hands toward the ceiling of the compartment. "I get visions, you know," he said almost sheepishly. "I've… seen some things. What may be the future. Or not. It's so hard to be sure. But you, Cassie, are a big part of it. As is your son. You have inner strengths you have yet to tap, and love enough to embrace a nation. But your son will need his mother's time and attention."
"What do you mean?" Cassie said defensively. "I am a good mother. I'm attentive to his every need."
"Except," Baltar said gently, "when Apollo is around. Or Starbuck. At those moments your infant is in the care of Nurse Dennison. And those moments grow more frequent."
Cassie thought about that, and admitted the truth to herself. Baltar was only stating what he had seen with his own eyes.
"What is it that your visions tell you about me… and my baby?" she asked.
Baltar thought for a few seconds. Then he said, "All I can say for certain is that he needs you now. He needs your undivided attention. And, for whatever reason, he has not been receiving it."
Cassie lowered her eyes and nodded. "I—it's because of what you said before. Maybe Apollo is not the baby's father. Maybe the baby's father is some alien monster! Maybe my son is… not human," she whispered this, finally giving voice to fears that had been consuming her for many months now.
Baltar took her hand in his once more, and she did not draw away.
"Cassie, such fears are natural. I believe your son is human. Or, perhaps, more than human. But he is not an alien monster. Do not turn your back on him. Do not allow your emotions for Apollo and Starbuck to overcome your instincts. This is a crucial moment for all the fleet. Let the warriors tend to their tasks. You must have your own agenda."
At that moment Cassie allowed herself to collapse into Baltar's arms, sobbing softly. Try as hard as she could to reject his words, she could not.
At last the tears ebbed, and she spoke. "I don't know why I should listen to you, let alone trust you. But the truth of your words resounds in my heart. I… I have been afraid of my own son." Wiping the remnants of tears from her cheeks, she sat up and graced Baltar with a full smile.
"Whatever your motives, Baltar, I thank you for your words. I've always prided myself on being a realist and a pragmatist, and I've recently strayed far from that path. I do need to reorder my priorities. Thank you."
And then she bent over and did something that took both of them by surprise. She kissed him softly on his cheek.
When Tigh, Apollo and Gar'Tokk attended their last meeting of the Gamon council, they were concerned about their newfound friends being left behind on a planet that could become a death trap very soon. Of course, the humans had been greatly relieved to hear the elder's explanation regarding the mass death of the Gamon protestors.
Death was not the same on every world.
The elder gave them a final message.
Do not be concerned for us. We will survive the same as our brothers and sisters who passed before us. You thought they died when they chose to make the great journey. As they did a short span ago, we will also pass from this world and evolve to a higher frequency of light, proceeding to new life in a higher dimension. The Paradis that you know will move back into light as we ascend to a Paradis that is even more beautiful than this one. Remember what you have learned here. You were foolishly on the way to a lower plane but now there is hope for you again.
The thoughts and power of the elder stayed with Apollo that night as he spent a lone vigil by the bedside of Starbuck. He didn't know if he brought the inner peace of the elder with him into that room but prayed that he did. He only knew that the plane he inhabited with his friends was precious to him and he wanted his comrade to return.
Starbuck was on both their minds, when Cassie accepted Apollo's invitation to revisit one of the planet's most beautiful spots. They met in a shaded glade on Paradis that would soon be lost to them once they returned to space.
"It's good for us to be here together," she said, "away from the hospital."
"Yes."
"I've been tending Starbuck for days. Do you believe he will come out of his coma?"
"I hope and pray he does. We both need him back with us."
They watched a small fountain bubbling, an ever-replenishing spring of fresh water. Apollo wished it might be the elixir of life so that he could take a cup to his old friend.
"They keep me informed about his condition, and I know you're there for him," he told Cassie.
"Yes."
"You still love him."
She caught his eye and spoke to his heart. "I will always love him, it's true. But I have love enough for another. I love you, too, Apollo."
She turned back to see his reaction but he kept his face impassive.
"You are a very special man and I've grown to care about you deeply. But I learned to take care of myself a long time ago. I never thought it would be possible, but the passage of time and the understanding of friends has taught me that I can stand on my own two feet, because I'm really not alone. I can be the woman I've always wanted to be."
In Apollo's eyes, Cassie had never looked more beautiful, more radiant, than at this moment. He felt the love of her bubble over inside and allowed himself to do what came next without thought or pause.
He got down on one knee, and Cassie's eyes went as wide as saucers.
"I may have forgotten how to do this properly, so please forgive me if I make a fool of myself," he said.
Her lips trembled, but she said nothing.
"It's been a while, but here goes. If you're willing to accept an extremely flawed man who has a long way to go in learning how to love a woman, will you be sealed to me, Cassie?"
"Oh, Apollo! You've just made me incredibly happy. But I feel no need to be closer to you then I am right now. In fact, I don't know how I could be any closer. I love you for asking."
Apollo was confused. "Is that a yes?" he said.
Cassie smiled. "No. I need you to be my friend, and sometime lover. But most of all right now I need you—we need you—to be Apollo, commander of the fleet. The man who will safely lead us from this fool's paradise to our greater destiny."
As he started to protest, she placed her forefinger on his lips.
"And our son needs a full-time mother. I can deal with that, if you can," she finished with a soft smile.
Apollo was flooded with conflicting emotions. Simultaneously he loved her more now than he ever had before, while feeling more relieved than he could ever have expected.
"So we keep the status quo?" he asked.
She nodded.
"And leave the question of sealing for the future?" •
"As you wish," she said. "But that's for the future. Right now, it would be a shame to waste this gorgeous setting, don't you think?"
Before he could respond, she embraced him and kissed him deeply.
It was a time of meetings and greetings, of farewells and memories. Quite by accident, Sheba and Rhaya met at Cain's grave. Afterward they would wonder if his spirit had helped bring about the encounter. Maybe there were no coincidences.
"I was wondering where you went off to," said Sheba, unable to forget Rhaya's birthmark.
"Did you know him well?" Sheba asked, nodding toward the grave.
"No, but I admired him," Rhaya answered. "I was raised without a father so I considered him a substitute."
"You never knew your father?"
"No, my mother told me he died before I was born."
Sheba put her hand on Rhaya's shoulder. "We have a lot to talk about concerning Commander Cain."
Rhaya sighed. "I hardly knew him but I feel that he was such a large part of my life."
"He was important to both of us. Let's drink ambrosa to honor the past."
"And let's drink to a great future," added the younger girl, whose intoxication was optimism.
The two women walked away from Cain's grave for the last time.
Cassie continued to work in the hospital. She was a few feet away from his bed the day that Starbuck regained consciousness. She moved to his side and quietly took his hand in hers.
He smiled up at her, and a few moments later, he spoke. "I thought I died and went to heaven when your face was the first sight I saw."
She fell on him with hugs and kisses. "You almost did, Starbuck. You had us all worried sick!"
"Hey, I thought I was the one who was sick."
She brought him water, still disbelieving her eyes. She tried to keep him talking. He hadn't suffered any brain damage as far as she could tell. It was another miracle on Paradis.
"I had a dream," he told her. "You and I were sealed and we had three children. Can you believe it? The funny part is that I felt happier than I'd ever been in my life."
Momentarily startled, Cassie recovered herself and remembered recent events. "Well, dreams are nice, but sooner or later we all have to face reality."
He didn't like the sound of that. "Cassie, I don't want to lose you. I know that I've let you down many times in the past. I've broken your
heart and caused you so much pain."
"We don't need to talk about that now. I'm glad you're back with us. That's all that matters."
He couldn't shake the feeling that her nursing of him had revived him only for him to discover that his secret fear was coming true. It was Cassie, not Athena, whom he truly wanted.
"I love you," he said.
She smiled at him. "I know."
"I need to ask you something now, Cassie. Something that I should have asked you long ago."
Cassie looked a bit startled at that. She began to shrug him off, but he persisted.
"Cassie, focus on what I'm saying, because I won't believe my own ears: Will you be sealed to me?"
He expected her to draw back from him then. He expected her to say she didn't love him enough to spend the rest of her life with him. He even expected her to say that it was Apollo she really loved, not him. What he did not expect her to do was to laugh.
She kissed him softly on the lips, and said, "No, Starbuck. I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. I'm kind of comfortable again with who I am. And I'm having a great time with my baby. And I like working with the doctors and nurses in sick bay. My life is full. And you are a major part of it—and always will be. And as long as we can keep things like that, I am happy."
All Starbuck could say was, "Did you say 'No'?"
Cassie laughed again, and nodded her head. "Yes, Starbuck. I said no. But if it makes you feel better, that's the same answer I gave Apollo when he asked me."
"Apollo? What—?"
"And now that you've regained consciousness, there are about two trillion people I have to tell." And with that, she rose and left a stunned and confused Starbuck.
"Did she say no?" he asked aloud, but there was no one there to respond.
During the course of the next few weeks, the Colonials made haste in their preparations to leave Paradis and its uncertain star. An amazing amount of ingenuity was displayed in reconstructing every vessel for which such a tactic was plausible. The revelation of the discovery of the ancient space ark, with its message from the Thirteenth Tribe, had been circulated throughout the fleet.
Battlestar Galactica-05-Paradis Page 24