by Mz. Lady P
Bella doesn’t even know about my daughter. I’m not ready to discuss that with her yet.
“Sorry I’m late, I had something important to do this morning.” Fatima walked in without a care in the world. That pissed me off even more.
“How nice of you to join us. It’s good to know that there’s shit more important than counting this money and discussing the next heist. Your ass is docked $1000.”
“Really Jayceon?”
“Just count the motherfucking money Fatima, I don’t want to hear shit.” She knew I wasn’t playing with her ass. Me, Rashad, Dominic, and Tech were already counting up the money from the heist we had just pulled off.
“What y’all niggas got over there?”
“Man Blockka, we got $500,000 over this way. What you got my nigga?” Rashad was putting the rubber bands on the separated bundles of money.
“I got $500,000 over this way too. Not to mention all these damn bars of gold and jewelry. This was definitely one of our biggest heists yet. We came out better than I thought we would. Next up, we have this armored car heist. I need all hands on deck. Fatima, if you can’t get here on time and be focused, you can sit this next one out. I don’t have time to be starting meetings late because you can’t get here on time. Money don’t wait for no motherfucking body.”
“You’re absolutely right Jayceon. Money doesn’t wait for no one. I was late because I wanted to put flowers and balloons on my daughter’s grave; after all, it is her fifth birthday.” Fatima had tears streaming down her face. How the fuck could I forget today was my daughter’s birthday?
“Could y’all step out for minute?” I needed to speak with Fatima alone.
“We’ll get up with y’all later,” Dominic said as we all dapped it up and they kissed Fatima goodbye. Once they were fully out the door I got up to embrace her, but she pushed me away.
“Don’t touch me. It’s her, she’s making you forget Angelica.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Ever since you got with that half-breed ass bitch, you’ve been acting like a bitch ass nigga. I’m sick of you treating me like I ain’t never been shit to you. You act like my daughter never existed!” Fatima mushed me in my face and I bit my bottom lip trying to calm down, to keep me from knocking this bitch the fuck out.
“Don’t put your hands me. Watch your motherfucking mouth. Bella ain’t never did shit to you and far as my daughter goes, you already know how I feel about her, so get out your feelings. I’m sorry I forgot about it being her birthday, but watch how the fuck you talk to me.”
“I swear to God I hate your ass.” She tried to slap me but I rushed her ass and pinned her down on the table.
“You better calm your motherfucking ass down before I choke slob from your mouth. Make this the last time you ever put your hands on me or even attempt to. Next time I’m going to treat you like the bitch you are. Now get the fuck out!”
“Fuck you Jayceon!” She snatched away from me and quickly walked out of the door. She slammed it so hard that the glass window shattered. I wanted to go behind her and break her fucking neck, but I just let her go. I hated to do her like that because I know she’s upset about our daughter but Fatima uses that shit to her advantage, I’m not stupid at all. Fatima’s issue is not me missing our daughter’s birthday, it’s about me moving on with Bella. She might as well get over it because we will never be again.
I waited for someone to come and fix the window. Once it was fixed I swung over to the crib and got ready for the banquet. I really wasn’t in the mood to go because Angelica was on my mind heavy. All I needed was a beautiful distraction. My baby, Bella was just what I needed at the moment. I know Bella will make me feel much better.
Chapter 3- Bella
This banquet needed to hurry up and be over. I wanted to get home to Jayceon. It wasn’t that I wasn’t proud of my parents and their accomplishments, I just hated that they had been talking shit about Jayceon all night. I hate that they judge him and they don’t know anything about him. I had been looking at my phone all night. I hoped and prayed he would at least call or text. It was a shame how I yearned for this man when I wasn’t with him. Lately, he had been gone more than he was at home. I can’t help but think there is something going on with him. It has crossed my mind that maybe he could be cheating, but not my baby.
“Are you going to be rude all night and look at your phone? Or are you going to pay attention to your father’s speech?” My mother had been being a bitch to me all night. As soon as I walked in she turned her nose up at my evening gown. She felt that it showed too much cleavage.
“I’m paying attention mother.” I drank my glass of Chardonnay straight down. I needed to be drunk to deal with this woman.
“Hey baby, I’m sorry I’m late.” I looked up and Jayceon was looking so good in his Armani Tux along with his Cole Haan loafers. He kissed me on the jaw and joined us at the table.
“I’m so happy you came. How come you didn’t call me and tell me you were coming? I would have met you at the door.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him.
“I wanted to surprise you. Good Evening Mrs. Santos. Congratulations to you and Mr. Santos on your achievement.” My mother just looked at him and rolled her eyes. She didn’t have to like him but she could have been respectful. I looked over at Jayceon and he was biting his bottom lip. That’s something he does when he is trying to calm down. I grabbed his hand under the table and squeezed it tight. A couple of minutes later my father joined us at the table.
“Good evening Mr. Santos. Congratulations on your achievement.” Jayceon had stood to his feet and extended his hand out to shake my father’s hand. Instead of my father shaking it, he just left him standing there with his hand out. I was so embarrassed with their behavior. Jayceon had been trying so hard to be respectful to my parents and they were being so rude to him. I just knew at any minute he was going to explode.
“I’m about to get something to drink. Do you want something?”
“No, I’m fine baby.” He kissed my hand and walked away.
“Who told you to invite that gangbanger to my event?” my father said, banging on the table with so much force that he knocked all the drinks over.
“He is not a gangbanger Daddy, I invited him because he is my boyfriend. What is the problem you guys have with him?”
“Face it Bella. He’s not good enough for you. Not to mention it’s not a good look for your career to be with a common thug. I think you should tell him to leave.”
“Yo Bella! I’m about to be out.” I looked up and Jayceon was standing there. The look on his face told me that he had heard everything. Tears welled up in my eyes because I was so hurt by my parent’s actions.
“I’m leaving with you baby.” I stood up and grabbed my things to leave.
“Isabella Santos! If you walk out of that door with him you are dead to us, and you will be taken out of the will.” Just like my selfish ass mother to be worried about money right now.
“All my life I’ve done everything you wanted me to do. I’ve succeeded at everything to make you happy. The one minute I choose something that makes me happy, you want to take it away from me. I love you guys but I also love Jayceon. I’m not about to walk away from him or let him walk away from me because you don’t like him. I’m sorry but I love him Daddy.” I grabbed Jayceon’s hand and we walked away. I could hear my father shouting obscenities and embarrassing us. Jayceon hugged me as we waited for the valet to bring his car around. On our way home, the car was silent but I swear I could hear my tears falling. Jayceon reached over, grabbed my hand, and kissed it. I was so hurt that I had to choose my man over my parents. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I could never turn my back on him or allow him to be disrespected. He goes hard for me and would never allow anyone to treat me badly. It just hurts because my parents are the only family I have and have given me a great life.
“I appreciate you going hard for a nigga,
but I would never want you to lose your parents over me.” Jayceon and I were lying in bed holding one another. From the moment we made it home, I knew that he wanted to say something to me about the incident back at the banquet hall.
“I’m not choosing you over them. I’m choosing what I want for change. You are who I want. I can’t walk away from you even if I wanted to. They made their decision and I made mine. My only request is that you don’t make me regret it. I love you baby.”
“I love you too Ma.” We kissed each other goodnight and I felt so comfortable in his arms. There was no place I would rather be. I just hope my parents can find it in their hearts to forgive me for the choice I made.
*****
“Baby, is everything okay?” Since the incident with my parents, Jayceon had been acting a little funny. I doubted that it had anything to do with that. It had to be something else that was bothering him. I know for a fact I have something that I need to discuss with him. For the last couple of nights, Jayceon has been saying another woman’s name in his sleep. I wasn’t feeling that shit at all. This nigga had better not been cheating on me, I swear I would kill him dead.
“Yeah, I’m good.” Jayceon was sitting on our veranda smoking a blunt and sipping on some D’usse. I wanted to just get straight to the point. I wasn’t about to beat around the bush about him saying another woman’s name while I laid next to him.
“Who is Angelica?” His calm facial expression changed to a look of sadness with a mixture of anger.
“I would rather not talk about it.”
“I suggest you tell me who she is, especially since you yell her name in your sleep.” He was making me mad sitting there acting all nonchalant.
“I said I don’t want to talk about the shit. Now drop the fucking subject.” Jayceon stood up and threw the bottle of liquor upside the wall causing it to shatter. He walked away from me and went inside the house. My feelings were so hurt. Who the fuck was the bitch that had him acting like this? I needed to get the fuck out of this house. It had been a minute since I kicked it with Skylar, so I called her to see if she wanted to go out for drinks. There had never been another time when I didn’t want to be around him, but all I wanted to do right now is get the hell away from him. Unfortunately, she was laid up with Tech. Those two were playing a dangerous game. Jayceon has no clue that they are fucking around. I don’t even want to be around when he finds out.
Since I couldn’t kick it with Skylar, I decided to go and visit with their mother, Ms. Tina, it had been so long since I visited. I didn’t even call I just went over there. I walked in the back door and I could hear voices. It was Jayceon’s mom voice but I didn’t recognize the other person’s voice. I did know it was a woman’s voice. I was about to walk further into the house until I heard the mention of Jayceon’s name and low and behold, Angelica. I just stood there and continued to listen to the whole conversation. I didn’t even know I was crying until I felt the tears streaming down my face. I heard steps coming towards the kitchen so I tried to hurry up and leave back out the door. I ended up bumping into the table and knocking over a glass. By this time Jayceon’s mother and an unknown woman came into the kitchen. I locked eyes with a woman who I just heard pour her heart out about Jayceon, my Jayceon. I didn’t know her, yet, the look in her eyes let me know that she knew of me. If looks could kill I would be one dead bitch.
“I’m sorry Ms. Tina. I was coming over to visit you, I should have called first.” I backed out of the kitchen.
“It’s okay Bella, you don’t have to go.” She walked towards me but I backed away from her. I didn’t mean to be disrespectful. I just couldn’t bear to be in the same room with a woman who just confessed her love for my man.
“My office just called, so I need to swing over there. Sorry about breaking your glass.” I rushed out the door and to my car. I just didn’t understand why Jayceon would tell me he didn’t have any kids. I think I was more hurt because he had history with somebody else. In my mind we were building milestones with one another. Come to find out he had already made milestones. I wiped my tears away as I laughed. What the fuck did I expect? This man was ten years older than me. Of course he had already done things in life that I had yet to experience. Call me selfish, I just always wanted him to do those things with me. Instead of going home I went to my office. Where else could I go? I popped open a bottle of Moet, I usually keep it here for my clients to celebrate the closing on a property. Right about now I needed it to calm my nerves. After drinking the entire bottle, I went home. All that damn crying I did had gave me a headache. Although I was mad at Jayceon, I wasn’t about to stay away from home. He owed me an explanation and I needed to give him a chance to explain before going off the deep end. There had to be a good reason why he didn’t tell me about having a daughter.
Chapter 4- Fatima
I had been so sad since visiting my daughter’s grave. Not having her here has been really hard. Having Jayceon close to me has gotten me through all of the hard times. Now that he’s in a relationship with someone else, I no longer have him. It hurts so fucking bad to know that we will never be together again. He’s the only man I’ve ever loved and to know that he no longer wants me is so hurtful. I had never laid eyes on her, Jayceon made it a habit to never bring her around me. Looking at her standing in Ms. Tina’s kitchen, my heart broke all over again. She was stunning and for her to be a big girl, she wore it well. I had become so self-conscious. I was glad that she heard our conversation. She needed to know that I loved him. She looked like a deer in headlights as we made eye contact. She didn’t have a clue about our daughter and that shit hurt. What was so special about her that he was so guarded with information pertaining to life before her? Ms. Tina is team Jayceon so whatever he does she agrees with. I poured my heart out to her and all she could say was get over it and move on. I will never get over losing my child. I used to blame Jayceon but I stopped doing that a long time ago. I never should have been blaming him to begin with. There is more to the story than I care to discuss. There are certain things that you should go to your grave with. The secret I’m carrying is definitely going to the grave with me. Hopefully, God can forgive me for my sins.
Angelica was his heart and he would never hurt her. The only thing he is guilty of is breaking my heart. Doing these jobs with him is becoming harder and harder. I’ve decided to just walk away from the Ski Mask Mafia. I can’t work with him knowing that he no longer loves or wants me. He openly talks about Bella to the fellas, as if I’m not in the room. It’s like a knife to my heart each and every time I hear him tell her how much he loves her. That is so disrespectful for him to do. I would never do that to him. Even if I did, I’m sure that he wouldn’t care.
I needed to move out of Miami. Being here was too painful. It’s fucked up how being in love with someone can break you down mentally. I had been out all day so I decided to head home and call it a night. I was surprised to see Jayceon’s car parked in my driveway. That’s another thing, he has access to my home, and I have no idea where him and his bitch even lives. All this shit has to end, I can’t take it anymore.
I walked inside the home that Jayceon and I had once shared. I walked around and didn’t see him anywhere. I knew exactly where he was. When our daughter was alive, we had converted the attic into her own personal play space. I walked up the stairs that led to the attic and he was sitting on the rug we had made with her face on it. She had all the American Girl dolls. Jayceon spoiled her rotten. Most little girls had one or two but our baby had all of them. Not to mention a huge dollhouse that he had built in the backyard the size of a damn garage.
“I thought I would find you up here.”
“She would be here if I had never looked away. I killed my damn daughter with my carelessness.” It had been a long time since I seen or heard him cry over our daughter.
“It’s not your fault and I don’t blame you. I know at first I did but I was wrong for that.” I went and sat beside him on the floor.
> “I remember when you went in labor. I was scared as hell.” We both laughed a little thinking of that crazy ass day.
“Yeah. That was a great memory. Especially when they had to give you a sedative because you were panicking. I’ll cherish that day and every day that she was here with us.” I kissed Jayceon on the jaw and I left out. I felt myself crying again and I had done enough of that for the day. I went to my room and took a shower. When I was finished I found Jayceon lying across the couch asleep. It had been so long since we had been around each other. I don’t know what came over me but I stood in front of him and dropped to my knees. I unbuckled his belt and pulled out his dick. I licked the head of it and slowly worked the entire thing into my mouth.
“Fuck is you doing Tima.” Jayceon had yanked my head up. At the same time his phone rang and he answered it. I knew it was Bella by the way he talked to her. I took him back into my mouth and cried as I continued to give him head. He was trying not to moan out but I was trying my best to make his ass do just that. He knows I’m a beast at this sucking dick shit. Once he hung up the phone I knew that I had made this nigga go from zero to one hundred real quick.
“Fuck Tima!” He roughly grabbed my hair and pushed my head down on his dick as far it would go. He was being so fucking rough. I was gagging but I refused to stop until he came in my mouth. Call me crazy, but I was trying my best to prove that I could still make him feel good. I was sucking, slurping and slobbing as if my life depended on it. Not long after he came, but he pulled out of my mouth and let loose all over my face. I tried to move but he held my face tight as hell in his hand so that I couldn’t move.