by Lee Kerr
Agnes moves closer to him, staring at Hannah as she grabs his arm. ‘You know we don’t have time. We had two choices and we chose to stay, which means we have to take the precautions that were advised to us.’
Hannah moves towards them. She can hear everything clearly, even the changes in Agnes’s tone as she speaks. ‘What’s going on?’ she asks, only a step away from them.
Simon ushers both of them towards the sofas, gently pulling Agnes off his arm and giving her a kiss on the cheek. ‘I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about, but as you can imagine with everything going on people are trying to make sure they are safe. We had a choice: to stay or be evacuated and a few of us, far fewer than I expected, have elected to stay in our homes.’
‘Evacuation?’ Hannah asks, sitting down without being asked. ‘I didn’t know anything about an evacuation.’
Agnes stays standing, her arms folded. ‘Perhaps this is a lesson about the class system for you after all, young lady.’
Hannah stands back up, ready to show Agnes what she really knows about the class system, thinking perhaps she’ll start her own little London riot, right here in this living room, or whatever it is.
Simon puts his arms out, taking a deep breath and trying to catch the eyes of both these women. Eventually he manages to usher Agnes to the door. ‘Why don’t you rustle us up some tea and check if the children need some juice.’
She looks at him, her eyes wide, her shoulders shrugging, making her thoughts clear about his deviation from the big plan very clear. ‘We don’t have time for this. They said to be locked down for when the energy curfew commences. We have talked all week about this.’
‘We have time,’ he says, calmly, giving Hannah hope that he can perhaps be reasoned with, that his moral compass will show him the right way.
‘I’m sorry,’ he says to Hannah, as he watches Agnes close the door. ‘She gets a little panicked but, as you can imagine, it has been a tough couple of weeks.’ He looks around the room and then gestures towards the suitcases in the corner with his head. ‘We were supposed to be in the Maldives right now but with everything going on we were advised not to travel. We have left them packed, as the army have said they might consider a forced evacuation, and I’m sure you can already imagine how that would go down with Agnes.’
Hannah doesn’t laugh, can’t comment and hasn’t heard anything about any evacuation where she lives. ‘And I don’t suppose you thought for one minute about your children, grandchildren or anyone else, whilst you have been busy debating how you would feel about getting an army airlift out of your little palace?’
He frowns and then shakes his head. ‘None of us asked for this. Not you, not me and not my son or daughter-in-law. They chose to go to America at the worst time and I’m surprised, but I guess even a week ago things weren’t as bad as they are now.’
Hannah nods, unable to disagree, and stares into space. ‘They’re saying that virtually the whole planet is affected.’
He nods back, offering the tiniest of smiles, the smallest bit of empathy. ‘That’s what they are saying. I wish I knew more, I really do.’
‘But why would they choose to go at such a time? I still don’t understand.’
‘They had their reasons and I imagine it revolves around money, or at least wealth, like everything always does.’ He looks around the room, catching sight of all the things Hannah has already admired. ‘Many people will do whatever they can to preserve their way of life. Some will fight and others will use money to give them power. One thing for sure is that Karen’s parents were not short of a few precious heirlooms.’
‘They left their children to fly across the world to collect valuables?’
‘Those valuables might help them to survive in the months and years to come. Maybe they went to get her parents and bring them back over. Whatever their reason, they deemed it important enough that they decided to travel without the kids, but the fact that they did leave them means they are coming back.’
Hannah leans forward, practically at the edge of her seat, the answer falling off her tongue. ‘When they come back you could pool your resources together so that you would have more power, and you could–’
He holds up a hand. ‘We will do no such thing, young lady. They clearly planned to come back and that’s why they left their kids with you. The best option open to you is to return home and wait for them.’
Hannah stares at him, waiting for something, desperately needing more. ‘You really don’t care, do you? Your grandchildren are next door and you’ve barely paid them any attention. All you’ve done is get them some fucking juice!’
He suddenly stands up, towering over her. ‘I have already raised my children and done my bit. I worked hard to put them through good schools, ensure they attended solid universities, and I paid more than my fair share for an extremely extravagant wedding.’
‘Oh, poor you,’ Hannah says, looking over at the pair of large suitcases.
‘But I did all of that. I stayed in a loveless marriage until I was 55 – constantly being nagged not to leave, not to break us up and always to do what is right for our children. You get less for life!’
Agnes walks back in, a tray in her hand – tea in mugs, no biscuits. Hannah instantly knows not everyone gets treated this poorly. ‘You really do get less for life,’ Agnes says.
Simon rests back down in the seat and takes a deep breath. ‘We both did our time and now our lives have changed – for the better, I must add.’
Agnes hands her a mug. ‘I took the liberty of adding milk and sugar.’
‘It will clearly speed up my departure,’ Hannah says, thinking of spilling it all on that nice rug just to see what reaction it gets from these two.
Agnes moves closer, staring at her, showing she is ready for their next round. ‘Look, we have a different set of priorities now and people shouldn’t judge us on our lifestyle choice.’ She sits on Simon’s lap and kisses him, a proper kiss that goes deep beyond the lips, something Hannah thought was reserved only for the young. It is the kind of kiss that she knows she should be experiencing on a regular basis, but seldom does. When they are finished she looks back at Hannah. ‘We each had very good jobs and when our children were still with us, we worked hard to give them everything we could.’
‘And settlement payments when we moved on,’ Simon says.
‘We really have done our bit and will do no more,’ Agnes says.
Hannah sets her tea down. ‘So that’s it? You don’t care what happens to your grandchildren?’
They both shake their heads in unison as Simon speaks for them: ‘I’m sorry, but we don’t see them as our children anymore, and we certainly don’t see those things next door as our responsibility any more than we would a homeless person. We made this clear when we divided up the family.’
‘They’re only children!’ Hannah shouts. ‘You would see them out on the street?’
‘What can we do?’ he says, looking to Agnes and then to Hannah. ‘This neighbourhood is already at risk and you know we are planning to stay here to defend our home.’
‘And perhaps even our lives,’ Agnes says, finding a tissue from somewhere in the depths of her sleeve and dabbing her dry eyes. ‘We built this home as a symbol of our new and exciting life together and now look at what is happening.’
Simon takes hold of his wife, his true companion and lover. Despite hating them for their open lack of humanity, Hannah can tell they were meant to be together, with everything that happened in the decades before their meeting just destiny’s silly games. If only they had met earlier and not settled down so early in life, they could have had many wonderful years together – perhaps their whole adult life. They could have had children together, developed their careers together and travelled the world as one, enjoying their bodies in their prime. Hannah sees their past mistakes, as much through her own choices as theirs.
Agnes looks at Hannah, her mind seemingly focused. ‘We really do have our own problems and
we asked not to be disturbed.’
‘So you really don’t consider that you have any commitment to those children in there?’
They both look at each other and shake their heads.
‘We have both started new lives,’ he says.
‘We made a commitment to each other to build this new life,’ she says. ‘We even had my dog put down.’
They quickly embrace as one, wrapping their arms around each other, as Agnes’s eyes finally show a liquid glint. ‘Nothing from before carried through into our new life.’
Agnes suddenly stands up. ‘I wish you’d never given them the address.’
Simon nods, then takes a white envelope from his back pocket and pushes it towards Hannah. ‘Here is £1,000. Use it to look after them until Alastair and Karen return, which I’m sure won’t be long now.’
Hannah keeps her hands down, refusing to take anything from them that will lead to this meeting ending. ‘Let us stay here, please.’
He shakes his head. ‘You and your boyfriend will be fine. You are young and far more likely to survive, as long as you adapt to the situation and keep your wits about you.’
Now it’s Hannah’s turn to shake her head, to share a secret or two of her own. ‘He doesn’t want them,’ she whispers, looking over at the door.
Simon takes a deep breath and stares at Hannah, twisting the ring on his finger. ‘Well, then, it’s lucky they have you.’
‘No,’ she says, shaking her head and edging towards them, desperate for their help, hopeful for their understanding when her own parents are so far away. ‘Please, help me. I’m begging you.’
He steps away from her, still holding out the envelope, but Hannah keeps her hands held by her sides. ‘I need more than money.’
He forces it into her hands and then lets go, no longer willing to argue. The scrunched-up envelope falls to the floor. She looks at it and then up at him, still unable to believe what she has had to witness. ‘I can’t do this,’ she says.
Simon gives her a stern look, as though he’s a parent telling a child that their first day at school will be fine, that the fear and anxiety will ultimately pass. ‘You can and you will.’
Agnes starts fidgeting, looking at the door and then over at Hannah. Her body is shaking now. ‘Make them leave, Simon!’ she shouts. ‘I don’t want them here and I don’t want any of this. It’s not the life we agreed to and I want you to make them leave us alone!’
Hannah looks over into the other room and sees two small shadows against the glass doors, and is immediately struck by the absence of a bigger shadow that she so longed to spot watching over them.
‘There’s enough hell out there without letting hell in here too, so make them leave!’ Agnes shouts, before rushing to those doors, frantically pulling them open. ‘Get out! It’s time to leave! We don’t want any of you here!’
‘Calm down, Grandma,’ Blake says. He is still casually sitting down, unwilling to be either a help or a hindrance.
It is Noah who steps forward, his finger pointed towards Agnes. ‘You’ve never wanted us and you’re the most horrible grandma in the world!’
‘I’m not your bloody grandma!’ she hisses, with a hand raised up.
Poppy starts crying and runs towards Noah, but he doesn’t seem to want back down. He faces the horror in front of him, full of new-found anger after his weeks of neglect.
Simon moves towards Agnes and grabs her arms, telling her to relax and that all of this will go away, that all these people will leave. He tries to calm her down, to silence everyone, as the voices, screams and cries of a very lost family echo throughout the room.
Blake walks past all of them, snaking his way around the ongoing feud. Time stands still for a moment as he makes his way towards Hannah, the only one who is silent, mesmerised by what she is seeing, witnessing the true horror of what a reconditioned human mind is capable of.
‘They are only children,’ she says, still looking at them. ‘Any adult’s instinctive reaction would be to protect them, especially now.’
‘Let’s go, now,’ Blake whispers in her ear, unwilling to debate anything he has heard. ‘While they’re distracted we need to sneak out and get into the car. By the time they realise we have gone, we will be speeding down the road to freedom.’
Hannah immediately shakes her head.
‘Look, I’ve heard all the shit that was being said between you and the Grandparents and I’ve been watching the news. There have been more killings and more random shit going on, especially in London. We have to look after ourselves so I say we get to Neil’s and grab him and Arianna. Then the four of us fuck off out of London for a while. We also need to get to a bank and get out as much cash as we can.’
Hannah takes her eyes off the fight, looking away from the crazy woman being held back by her husband, and the boy now hitting the monster before him. It would be a scene from some family drama if it wasn’t happening against the backdrop of a floor-to-ceiling mahogany stand, the wood as polished as the ornaments it holds. ‘As much as I can get?’
‘Yeah,’ he says and stares at her. ‘You know I haven’t got any and they didn’t hand out any dole money this week.’
‘So what are you bringing to this little trip?’ she asks. ‘The entertainment? And will that be electronic or penis-shaped?’
He scrunches up his face, shaking his head. ‘Oh, what are you on about now?’
‘Should I pack your bags for you too? Because, let’s face it, you can’t even bring your own car to the party.’
‘Enough!’ he hisses, looking over at the ongoing feud. He realises that they have attracted the attention of Simon, who is now looking over at them while leaning down and trying to talk some sense into little Noah, as well as holding back his frantic lover.
Hannah watches the battle she has created unfold before her eyes, listening to Simon try to explain his lifestyle choices to a ten-year-old.
‘I did my job,’ Simon says.
‘These kids were just a job,’ Blake whispers.
‘I did more than I should have,’ Simon says.
‘You’ve done more than you should have,’ Blake whispers.
Blake starts to pull Hannah away. ‘They are with family, like it or not, and it’s time they got into the real world and we fucked off. Do you think their parents are coming back, with all this shit going on? Where will these kids be safer? Stuck in your poky two-bedroom flat, or in this palace that’s probably got the army watching its back.’
Hannah looks over at them as Blake’s voice rings in her ear. ‘But they won’t be loved,’ she finally says, looking at him, desperately wanting to hear him agree.
‘It’s now or never,’ he says, already stepping away.
Hannah feels him leave, his breath no longer tickling her skin. She is trying so hard to sort all these things out in her mind, remembering the parents who have disappeared and the threats that have surfaced all around the world. What matters most is where these children will be safest, and clearly it will be here, because what these two can afford is safety and security, and surely that is more important than love. If they survive, they can look for love later; they will have a roof over their heads and each other for company.
‘Okay,’ Hannah says, pulling him back towards her. She turns to him out of a desperate need for reassurance but this is something which Blake cannot give her; he can only show her what is right for him. He pushes her towards the door.
A few seconds later they’re in the hallway. Blake is at her back. ‘Faster!’ he shouts.
‘Where are you going?’ she hears Simon shout over Poppy’s crying and Noah calling out her name.
She says nothing, but grabs the door handle. It won’t open.
‘Bottom handle!’ Blake shouts.
She nods, genuinely trying her best. Both her hands shake as she tries all the handles and locks, pulling the door and begging it to open. She knows they are coming and the thought scares her – especially if he is with them. Please,
she thinks, any of them but Noah.
‘For fuck’s sake!’ Blake shouts, pulling her out of the way. ‘We are not staying here!’ He tries the handles for himself; the seconds tick by slowly. She can’t watch him anymore and she knows she must turn to face her enemy. She prays, desperate for him to get that door open and set them free, but he’s doing no better than she did. They are both too slow. She takes a deep breath, ready to face Simon, hopeful that it’s only him.
It is Noah that turns the corner first, just a second before. She sees his small body overshadowed by his reluctant grandfather. ‘Hannah,’ he says, tears streaming down his face. ‘Where are you going?’
‘Yes, Hannah, where are you going?’ Simon asks, as he towers over the boy.
She can’t say anything in return, doesn’t know where to begin. She hears the door open, and sounds of celebration from Blake echoing across the hall. He pulls her backwards.
‘You’re taking them with you!’ Simon shouts and lurches towards them.
She ignores him, knowing only one person truly matters right now. ‘I’m sorry,’ she mouths to Noah, with tears rolling down her cheeks.
Blake puts the keys in her hand. ‘Fucking run!’ he shouts, pushing her down the path.
Simon gives chase. She thinks about all the experience of life he has: his decades of festering bitterness, the few precious years he has spent living for himself – it’s vast in comparison with Blake, the boy who has literally done nothing.
Hannah reaches the car first and throws herself into the passenger seat. She leans over and puts the keys in the ignition, her hands still shaking. She looks up to see that Blake and Simon are halfway down the path. The kids are running past them and towards the car. ‘We’re coming!’ Poppy shouts, her small legs trying their best to get her to where she desperately wants to be.
And that’s when Hannah does the unthinkable; the one action that undoes all the good work she has done. All those months of care, all those recent nights when they crawled into bed and she held them tight, they mean nothing now as she locks the doors.