“You shouldn’t have to justify it to me. I didn’t mean to sound like you had to tell me how you get your money.” Scottie hadn’t asked outright, but he knew he’d pushed to know exactly how Jax was able to afford to live there.
“No, no,” Jax said. “You didn’t. I’ve dated guys before who chase firefighters. It’s not like I advertise being gay, but sometimes it crops up on the job or when I’m out with the guys. They expect the rough around the edges cocky man in a hot uniform. The guy in slacks and a button up eating roasted veggies and hummus and drinking a microbrew with friends doesn’t fit the lifestyle they assume I live.”
“Well, I like this side of you a lot better than the asshole I met the first day, if that helps. And I really want to see you in those slacks once that brace is off.”
“It does.” Jax ran a hand over his hair and then grimaced, holding his hand out to the side. “Ugh.”
Scottie leaned forward. “You okay? Do you need something?”
“Yeah, to wash off the hospital. My hair is greasy, and I can still smell the weird shampoo they use.”
“I can help you with that.”
Jax lifted an eyebrow. “I know you’re hot for my body—I saw that bulge in your pants before you sat down—but I don’t think I’m up for naked shower time quite yet.”
“Not with that knee anyway. But don’t act like you didn’t stretch and show off those muscles on purpose. That groan? Right.” Scottie was rapidly learning how Jax operated. Those stolen glimpses he thought he was getting in the hospital had been offered up on purpose as a tease.
Jax didn’t even look guilty.
“I have a home health aide coming in tomorrow from some agency the hospital recommended. Apparently they can cook, clean, and help me do a few things so I don’t turn into a chair potato.”
“There’s no reason why you have to deal with feeling grungy until tomorrow. I bet washing your hair and face would make you feel a lot better. I can put a chair in front of the sink, so if you need to take a break, you can sit down.”
“Done this before?”
Scottie shrugged. “Maybe I just want to get my hands on you any way I can.” If Jax could tease, so could he. “I give excellent massages.”
Jax groaned for real. “If you give me a massage, I will promise to stop teasing you.”
“Don’t do that!” Scottie said quickly. “I need something to fuel my nighttime fantasies.”
“Well all right, then.” Jax tilted his head. “You weren’t as… open in the hospital as you are here.”
Apparently they were both sharing something that had affected their past relationships. “I’m not in the closet, if that’s what you’re thinking.” It would be ironic if he was, when Jax was the one in the career where being openly gay could be a problem. “I’m just not comfortable being very public in my relationships.”
“What does that mean?” Jax asked. “You don’t want people to know we’re together if we go on dates? Or no dates at all?”
If he wasn’t careful, Scottie was going to lose his chance with Jax before they even went on a single date. “No, that’s not what I mean. I won’t ask you to pretend that we’re buddies hanging out. I’m not against things like holding hands or discreet kisses, as long as it’s the right time and place. But, I’m not built like you. I had some issues being harassed in college, and it’s made me leery when I’m out with someone I’m attracted to. I’m always watching to see if someone has a problem with me, and it makes me tense. I’m more comfortable in private, so I’m not afraid to be open when I’m alone with someone.” He took a deep breath. “Is that a deal breaker?”
Jax didn’t answer right away, and Scottie began to lose hope. He couldn’t help his anxiety issues, and a lot of guys assumed he was struggling with accepting his sexuality when that wasn’t the issue at all. He’d put away the groceries he brought and go. Scottie scooted forward on the couch, ready to stand up.
“No.” Jax held out a hand. The pink patches of burned skin that were still healing looked lighter against the rest of his tan skin. “I might not understand it, but we all have issues, right? As long as you don’t freak out on me if I touch your hand while we’re walking down the street just because someone might see us, I think I can handle your need to keep things more private. Besides, maybe I’ll like knowing your naughty side only comes out around me.”
In all honesty, Scottie hadn’t really expected Jax to accept his issues with public intimacy. Seeing was believing, though, so he’d give him a chance. Scottie took a breath. “Okay.”
“Okay,” Jax repeated. “So how about that hair wash now? It really does feel disgusting.”
“I bet.” Scottie stood up. “Let me go get things ready in the kitchen. I have those groceries you asked me to pick up that I need to put away before I forget.”
“Just holler when you’re ready, and I’ll hobble my way in there.”
Scottie looked around. “Do you need your crutches?” He couldn’t see them.
“They’re right down here.” Jax leaned sideways and pulled them up from where they were tucked between his chair and the wall.
“All right. Give me a few minutes.” Scottie put the vegetables and meat in the fridge. He opened up a few different cupboards until he found the dry storage areas. The bread and fruit he left on the counter, tucked into a corner out of the way. Scottie dragged a chair over from the dining table and set it up next to the sink. He checked the water pressure and discovered the faucet actually detached. That would make it even easier.
He poked his head around the wall. “Is the bathroom you usually use upstairs or downstairs?”
“Upstairs, but there is a full bathroom off the guest room.”
“I need to get some towels and your shampoo.”
“That’s upstairs. My bedroom is the third door on the right, and the master bath is through the door to the left of the dresser. Everything you’ll need is in there.”
“If you want to start making your way into the kitchen, it’ll only take me a minute.” Scottie hurried up the stairs and found his way to Jax’s bedroom and bathroom. It was surprisingly neat and spare, the bed covered with a gray comforter and an armoire dominating the room. Matching nightstands flanked the bed.
The bathroom was as nice as the kitchen, double vanity sinks and a sunken tub in the corner beside a tiled walk-in shower. That would help when Jax was able to shower without the brace on. Scottie reached in and grabbed a bottle of shampoo from an inset cubby above the built-in seat, almost surprised it was a regular dandruff shampoo brand and not some fancy salon mix.
“Where are the towels hiding?” Scottie found them in the closet by the toilet. He grabbed two washcloths and three towels, just to make sure they’d have enough. Jax was waiting in the kitchen, his bad leg dangling straight while he propped his good knee on the cushioned chair.
“This how you wanted me?” He leaned over the sink.
“Perfect,” Scottie said. “I brought the face wash and electric razor I saw on the counter too.”
“Yeah, that would be good. Scruffy isn’t a sexy look.” He took the razor from Scottie and turned it on, rubbing it over his cheeks.
“I don’t know,” Scottie said. “I think you make it work.”
“Flattery will get you nowhere… right now.” Jax grinned and then folded his lips in to get below his nose.
“Noted.” Scottie turned on the water and let it warm. “Do you want to wash your face before or after we do your hair?”
“After.”
“Okay.” Scottie pulled the faucet out of the base. “Face down and try to keep your head in the middle of the sink.”
Scottie took his time making sure Jax’s hair was wet, enjoying how the soft bristles felt against his fingers. When he was done, he noticed the spray had soaked the collar of Jax’s shirt. “Damn, I got your shirt pretty wet.”
“No problem.” Jax lifted his head up and pulled his shirt off.
The air in the r
oom got noticeably thicker as Scottie struggled to keep the lust the view of Jax’s chest inspired at bay. Not an ounce of fat on him, and Scottie itched to trace the ridges of his eight-pack with his fingers and tweak Jax’s light brown nipples until they ached so good.
When he was alone with a lover, he adored touching and being touched, even if it didn’t lead to sex. As hot as Jax was, he wasn’t going to be able to stand up much longer, and fooling around was not on the agenda.
Jax was watching his reaction and smirking, so Scottie aimed the hose at his forehead and pulled the trigger. Jax yelped.
“Back over the sink.” Scottie thoroughly shampooed Jax’s hair, rubbing his scalp in a soothing massage at the same time. He also wet one of the washcloths and rinsed off Jax’s neck, shoulders, and back before draping his shoulders with a towel. “Rinse time.” He handed the dry washcloth over. “Make sure you cover your eyes.”
Scottie made sure he got all the shampoo out, running the spray through Jax’s hair until it pressed dark and sleek against his scalp. Pausing for a minute, he turned off the water and urged Jax to lean upright, using the towel on his shoulders to dry his hair, rubbing back and forth gently.
A bulge pressed against the front of Jax’s shorts, so he was at least half-hard, but he had his eyes closed and was breathing slowly and deeply. Scottie guessed he was soaking in the touches, and he didn’t want to break the mood by teasing Jax about it. “I’m going to wash your face and chest now.”
Jax’s breath hitched, but he nodded.
First Scottie used a wet rag, and then he added soap. Finally, he rinsed every inch of skin, brushing the washcloth over Jax’s cheeks, chin, neck, and chest. He fought the urge to tease Jax’s nipples when they went stiff, but it was a harsh temptation. Scottie’s shaft was rigid, and his balls ached.
He used the second towel to dry Jax off, gently wiping his eyes and patting the rest of his face dry, then swiping the water off his chest and abdomen. Standing so close, Jax’s spicy scent and warmth surrounded him, and Scottie couldn’t resist staring back intently when Jax opened his eyes.
Their lips met, Jax’s every bit as soft and full as they looked. Scottie pulled back a fraction of an inch and then moved in again, melding his lips against Jax’s, encouraged when he returned the kiss. There was no tongue, not even with how desperate Scottie was to taste Jax because, before they got too carried away, Jax lost his balance.
Scottie wrapped his arms around Jax, barely keeping them both upright. “Grab the chair.” Once he was stable, Scottie took a step back and began snickering.
“What’s so funny?”
“I knocked you off your feet with one kiss.” Scottie grinned.
Jax made a face. “Foot. And I’m drugged.” He dragged Scottie close again. Sliding his hand down his lower back to cup Scottie’s ass, Jax whispered in a husky voice, “Just wait until I can pick you up. You’ll wrap your legs around me, and I’ll take you up to that big bed I have upstairs and strip you bare. I will touch you everywhere”—he squeezed—“with my fingers, my tongue, my cock… until you come so hard you won’t be able to move at all. And then I’m going to do it again.”
Scottie was so turned on that he was soaking his underwear, and he knew there was going to be a wet spot on the front of his jeans. “You win.” His voice shook, and he had to swallow several times before he could say, “And I’m holding you to that.”
Chapter Ten
JAX’S FOOT hung over the end of the massage table. He grunted when he bent his toes down, using the rubber band as tension. He hadn’t realized how many muscles he used in his whole leg just to move his foot. The soft tissue damage around his knee was extensive, and it was taking longer than he liked to see any progress, plus his pain levels were still high.
“You have to be patient and don’t overdo it,” his therapist said. “Don’t tell me you’re not because I can see that you’re more swollen today than you were on Monday.”
Scottie was busy finishing up two projects at work, so they hadn’t been able to see each other. Jax couldn’t work, most of his friends were out fighting to save the forests during one of the worst fire seasons in decades, and daytime TV sucked. A lot.
What else was he going to do? “I need to get better, Aleksi.”
“If you push too hard, you’ll damage the healing tissues. Give me that.” He took the band away from Jax, who gave it up reluctantly. Aleksi dropped it on the counter along the wall next to a small machine and then turned back to Jax, crossing his arms over his chest. “You know, usually I have patients who don’t want to do the homework I give them. You’re just an overachiever.”
“Guilty. I got a guy who likes to hike, and I want to be able to do that with him.” Jax had bluntly told Aleksi he’d be working with a gay man if he took him on as a client, but the therapist had shrugged and pointed out his only interest in Jax was his leg. That, and Jax would probably hate him within minutes of his first session.
“Well, I don’t think that’s going to happen before the rain comes back, even if it does feel like summer is going to last forever. I’m sure he’d rather have you whole next summer than dealing with a permanent weakness.”
“Don’t say things like that out loud.” He couldn’t do his job if he couldn’t pass the physical tests. As much as it would kill Jax to leave his crew, he wouldn’t risk killing any of them because he couldn’t hack the realities of the job.
Aleksi moved down to the foot of the table and picked up his leg, slowly bending it at the knee. “Then stop pushing your healing process, and let me decide how hard to work your leg. Do the reps I tell you, and only as many sets as I tell you.”
Jax scowled, but he was forced to lean back on his arms when his knee wouldn’t bend all the way. The muscles strained and then locked tight, not moving anymore. “Fine.”
“Good.” Aleksi used one hand under his knee and one around his ankle to support Jax’s leg as he slowly straightened it back out and set it down on the table. “I have a few things I want to try that might help with the swelling you have now and your overall pain. I know you hate the medications.”
“Like what?”
Aleksi picked up a handheld device off the counter. A cord went to a black handle with a ball on the end. “This is an ultrasound device. With it, I can actually administer some cortisone below the skin without the use of any needles. The ultrasound vibrations will also cause deep-tissue heating and increase blood flow to the area, which can help speed up healing and decrease the swelling. I’ll use this in the office after your exercises.”
That actually sounded cool. “If you think it will help, let’s go for it.”
“The second thing is something you can also do here, but I’d like you to do at home too.” He put the ultrasound down and grabbed a small black case. He set it on the massage table next to Jax and opened it up. “This is an electrical stim unit.” He showed Jax a small box with a digital window and two dials. “You insert the leads into the box here, and then the probe ends go into the patches. These are sticky so you can place them on your leg and they won’t fall off.” He picked up a set of wires folded up neatly and a clear bag with two white squares inside.
“I’m going to show you how to put this on now and calibrate the settings for the program I want you to use. When you take it home, you can use it several times a day, but not longer than twenty minutes at a time. It’ll also promote good blood flow and help decrease your pain level.”
“High-tech.”
Aleksi snorted. “Not really. You can find these machines on Amazon for under a hundred bucks. This is a much nicer version that your insurance will cover, though.”
“Show me how it works, Doc.”
By the time Jax’s appointment was done, he’d been buzzed and ultrasounded. The ultrasound was the weirdest thing; it didn’t really feel like Aleksi was doing anything at all. He joked that it was a great racket: fake medical device duped patients into dozens of appointments.
The r
eal racket was the taxi service in Vancouver. Big cities had cabs all over. Vancouver was small enough you had to call for a ride, and it wasn’t exactly cheap. Not being able to drive was another one of the worst parts of being hurt. He had to pay for a cab to come all the way out to his house and then take him to physical therapy.
“Hey, Derek. I’m done for the day.” He paid for a home health aide to come out three times a week, and timed two of them with his twice weekly PT appointments, so he could get them to pick him up at the end of his hour. The agency sent a man at his request after the first woman they sent couldn’t physically help Jax move around. Besides, he didn’t like chicks that close to his naked bits, not even covered with a towel, and after his showers he needed someone to get his shorts over his foot since he couldn’t reach that far.
Derek wasn’t as big as Jax, but he was strong enough to get the job done. Maneuvering inside the smaller downstairs bathroom was a pain, but he didn’t have the energy to go up and down the stairs to the master bedroom multiple times a day yet.
“Can you take that?” Jax nodded at the zipped-up case holding the electrical thing Aleksi wanted him to use.
“Sure. Let me grab your bag too.”
It wasn’t a real trip to the gym, but Jax liked to bring a bag with a towel, change of shirt and shorts for the hot tub, and a water bottle in his duffle. “Thanks.” He was tired, and they still had to get back to his place, he had to make it up the stairs, and then it was the dreaded shower time.
Getting hurt had taught Jax more than a few lessons in humility. He wasn’t that modest, but he didn’t like his space being invaded by strangers, and medical personnel had no concept of out of bounds. They asked about everything, poked anywhere and everywhere, and generally forced him to endure it with a flushed face and clenched jaw.
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