Payne
Page 12
I don’t remember making a conscious decision to go to him. It happened in the span of a heartbeat...mine and his combined. I made a strangled sound born of lust and longing. I’d pushed away these feelings for so long, one kiss and the dam burst.
The moment I let my guard down, hell broke loose inside of me. I literally threw myself at Payne. He caught me in his strong arms and we tumbled into the tall grass together. Later, I might remember how fitting it was that we should come together here. This place was wild, untouched, just like my heart. On one side of the river was freedom, the other, pain and uncertainty. My heart warred with itself. The one thing I knew could save me was the thing I’d tried to run from.
Payne’s strong hands dragged my jeans down. I’d landed on top of him. I pulled the hem of my shirt and yanked it over my head along with the tank top I wore beneath it. The cool air hit my bare breasts, making the nipples pebble instantly. Payne groaned at the sight. He leaned forward, bringing his lips to my left nipple. I held my breath as he kissed me there. He was so strong, so careful not to startle me.
“Payne,” I gasped. A flood of desire slammed through me. That one kiss, one touch had unleashed a torrent of emotions. My sex throbbed. Payne’s cock went rigid against my thigh. Already slick and wet, I ached for him to fill me.
He let me take the lead. Payne put his hands on my hips as I straddled him. My hair fell down like a thick curtain, brushing against his shoulder. I slid my hands over his shoulders. He was so strong, so solid. The hard-cut muscles of his chest and abs clenched as I leaned down and kissed my way to his hips.
Payne whispered my name over and over as he struggled to keep his promise. He wouldn’t touch me unless I wanted him to. He wasn’t kidding. He hooked his hands behind his head and lay on his back as I did all the exploring. He shuddered with coiled desire as I kissed back up to his shoulder. I hovered above him, nose to nose. Then, I crushed my lips to his.
Gasping for air, I drew back. My sex pulsed with need. His thick cock throbbed against my thigh. I couldn’t hold back for another second. Positioning myself over him, Payne finally brought one hand from behind his head. He placed it on my hip to steady me.
Our eyes locked and I knew exactly what he was thinking. As his blazed green, he wanted to know if I was sure. Maybe my head wasn’t, but my heart was true.
“Yes!” I gasped. Payne jutted his chin up then thrust his hips forward. I circled my fingers around his hard cock then drove him home.
Heat and light exploded behind my eyes. Payne stretched me wide and filled me. I cried out his name as I settled over him and brought my hips down. Oh, God. He was in me. His cock twitched against my walls and it felt like flying.
Yes. This. Always.
Payne let me set the pace. I went slowly at first, savoring every steel inch of him. Then, instinct took over. All I could do was hold on and ride the wave. Payne held me steady with his hands on my hips. I bucked and rocked, taking him deeper with every stroke. Desire built within me reaching a crescendo, bursting, then rising again. I’d never felt anything like it before. It seemed the more I took, the more I wanted. My body and soul had been starved for so long, I felt like it could never be sated.
I came around him in a starburst of color. My juices coated us and eased him even deeper. Sweat popped out on Payne’s brow as he held back. He kept his promise. But, now that I’d touched him and brought him into me, I knew he couldn’t be gentle. Oh, God. I didn’t want him to be. With each thrust and every deepening inch I took something back.
My choice. My body. My needs.
As Payne let me fuck him, I smashed a barrier I’d built inside my heart. No more. No more. No more.
Payne took it. Every punishing thrust seemed to heighten his own desire. He grew fuller, thicker, longer. He spread me wide and filled me deep. He was everything. With each pounding thrust, he gave me back to me. God, why had I waited so long to take it?
Then, when my bones turned to rubber and I started to slip, Payne took the lead. He flipped me with dizzying speed and had me on my back, my legs spread wide. I thought I was done. It turns out, we had only just begun.
“Lena,” he whispered my name in my ear as he took his pleasure from me. For as much as I felt like I’d clawed something back, when Payne fucked me, I knew it was the same for him.
We found ourselves in each other that night on the banks of the Ohio River. There were no rules. No control. Just passion, desire, and fate. Mine and his.
“Yes!” I cried as I felt Payne’s balls hitch. He had so much to give and I wanted to take it all. I found the strength to wrap my legs around his thighs, spurring him on. Payne clawed the earth, bracing himself on either side of my shoulders. His wolf eyes flared bright as his nostrils flared and he arched his back.
“Yes!” I shouted again. Then, acting on pure instinct, I dug my nails into his back, drawing blood. Payne went rigid. A great shudder went through him and he threw his head back. A howl ripped from him as he spilled his seed inside of me. Oh, yes, I’d set him free. Over and over again.
Heat blossomed at the base of my neck. I felt a new pulse there and an almost overpowering urge. I knew what it meant. I ached for it with a craving so strong it took my breath from me. Payne met my eyes. His were wide, luminous, and green, the dark pupils mere pinpoints as his inner wolf flared hot. His lips curled and the tips of his fangs came out.
Leaning up, I threaded my hands around his neck. I kissed him once on the cheek as he crested down. Oh, I wanted so much more. I was so close to turning, going on all fours and exposing my neck to him.
Payne moved, coming to rest alongside me. He gathered me into his arms and placed a chaste kiss at the base of my neck and held me close beneath the stars.
Sixteen
Payne
Lena was light, heat, air. Her touch animated me, brought me to life. I hadn’t even known I was dead. For twenty-six years I had walked, talked, breathed, fought. It meant nothing. I thought my freedom had been worth fighting for. It was, but only because it brought me to her. She was the reason. It was if all the pieces of my life aligned in such a way to bring me to Birch Haven last year for her and her alone.
I was not just born an Alpha; I was her Alpha. I had to live through Able Valent’s tyranny so that I could find it in me to break free and help strengthen the rest of the wolves of Mammoth Forest and bring Mac, Lena’s brother, into my life.
Her clean scent filled my lungs as I brought her close to me, loving the solid weight of her in my arms. I felt suspended in time. The stars shone just for her. The churning waters of the Ohio River beckoned. I knew at that moment I would get her across it. Mammoth Forest didn’t matter. The mission to find more Wolfkiller ammo was secondary. Getting Lena safely away where Able couldn’t find her meant everything.
Lena turned to me. I traced a circle around her left nipple. I kissed her there, loving the way she rose to it. Her body tuned to mine. Even now, I could sense the rising heat inside of her. If I dipped my finger between her legs, I’d find her slick with need. God. I longed to plunder the depths of her all over again. She’d come for me, clawing with an eager violence that set my nerves on fire.
She groaned as I let my fingers trail along the slope of her hip. I tilted her body toward mine. We fit. She wasn’t small like most women I knew. She had long, lean legs and the kind of ass I could get my hands around. At that moment, I knew I could kill just to steal a few more minutes alone with her.
“Payne,” she whispered, shifting away from me so she could sit up. She was thinking too hard. Her expression grew sheepish as she fumbled for her top and then her jeans. The beast rose within me, wanting to pull her back down and spread her wide. The urge to mark her burned through me, even though I knew I could probably never act on it. Again, I felt my need to kill Able and make him pay for twisting that part of her from me.
I rose, reaching for my own pants. I stabbed my legs through them and put a hand out to her. Lena stood on shaky legs. Desire roared th
rough me again. Oh, yes, I wanted to make her weak in the knees for days. A vision of taking her from behind slammed into my brain. Even as I thought it, I knew the skin at the base of her neck burned for me. She put a hand flat against her neck and let out a little gasp that tore at me.
“It’s okay,” I said. “You know I wouldn’t…”
“I know,” she said, almost barking out the words. “Payne. I know.”
“You know what?” Did she? Did she really understand what she was meant for?
“I know about...fated mates,” she said, her voice as shaky as her legs. She paid a price for saying it out loud. Again, I tried to bottle my rage and keep it from her.
“You do?” I asked. “Because I’m not sure I do. Not in the way I’m supposed to. What we are...what there is between us...you shouldn’t be afraid of it. And yet you are. That makes me want to kill something for you. I will kill for you.”
Her face went white and she backed away from me. “I thought I could,” she said, tears welling in her eyes. “I mean...I thought that would help. If I took something back for myself, it would drive...him...further away.”
I could barely see straight. White rage clouded my vision. In my mind’s eye, I saw myself ripping Able Valent to shreds. I would present his head to Lena if that’s what she wanted.
I staggered sideways, heading for the woods. I shot out one hand and gripped the bark of a maple tree to steady myself. Two things drove me with equally devastating force. Lust and rage. They were wrapped together in my heart. Lena was mine. My mate. My fate. She could turn away from me forever, but I would die and kill for her until I knew she was safe. Even if it meant I had to live with half of my heart. The other half felt torn from me; only marking her would heal it.
“Payne.” Lena came to me. She put a tentative hand on my shoulder. Even that light touch seared through me. My inner wolf bubbled up. I needed to shift, or I needed to fuck. Hovering between both urges brought stars to my eyes. Something similar was happening to Lena. Her pulse raced along with mine. It would be like that now, always. Marking her would make her even more a part of me.
“I want,” she said. There was more to her sentence, but she didn’t seem able to find the right words. In the end, it’s all she needed to say. She wanted. I wanted. But, maybe we were both too damaged to do anything about it.
When I finally came back into myself, I turned to her. She looked at me with wide eyes, her face wet with tears.
“I’m trying to tell you I know what you are to me. I know you’re mine. But Payne, I can’t let you mark me. I just can’t. What if I never can?”
I knew she was asking herself as much as me. My heart bled for her, for us. I went to her, putting one firm hand on her shoulder. With the other, I lifted her chin until she met my eyes. Hers swirled with dark hope and longing, but also pain. I would have given my soul if I could drive it away.
“You’re mine,” I said. She flinched, but I didn’t let her go. “But, I would never...never...mark you if you didn’t want it. And if you never want it, so be it. Know this: I’ll protect you no matter what.”
She tried to pull away. I wouldn’t let her.
“Lena,” I said, my voice deep with emotion. “No. Matter. What. Do you hear me? The Pack will never make you do anything against your will again. They’ll never even get near you.”
“But, he’s still there!” she shrieked. I finally pulled my hands away from her. “It won’t go away.”
I set my jaw. She might hate me for what I had to say, but I had no choice. “No. It won’t go away. Left the way it is, Shelby’s mark is permanent and Able inherited it. It’s not as strong with Able, but it’s there. It’s there until somebody kills him. Or unless you let me mark you.”
I wasn’t telling her anything she didn’t already know. But now, since she’d let me inside her, she understood it fully. My mark would free her from the Pack, but it would bind her to me. For now, she couldn’t have it. The agony of her choice etched deep lines in her brow.
She was about to say something. Perhaps she meant to explain again why she couldn’t go through with my marking. I understood. Though it ripped my guts apart not to be able to be with her the way we were meant to be, I understood. She was my mate. I would take her however I could get her or not at all. As long as I kept her safe, nothing else mattered.
Lena’s words died on her lips though as a keening howl rose behind us. We’d stayed too long. The border patrols were closing in.
“Shit,” I said, reaching down to grab the backpack. No sooner had I done it than I cast it aside. Where we were going, we wouldn’t need it.
“Payne, it’s Able. I can feel him.” In a panic, she clawed at the scar on her neck. I went to her, pulling her hand away.
“Stop,” I said. “You’ll only make yourself bleed. It’s going to be all right. I’d hoped to take the bridge, but we don’t have time. Can you swim?”
“What? Of course...but now? Payne, it’s half a mile across to Banchory. I’m strong, but I’m not fast.”
“You don’t have to be either,” I said. “You just have to hold on and keep your head above water.”
No sooner had I said it than three Pack betas ripped through the woods. Their eyes blazed killer red. It meant either Able or one of his top generals was close by.
“Come on!” I yelled. I lunged for Lena, picking her up and throwing her over my shoulder. I took the cliff at a dead run. The Pack wolves nipped at my heels, tearing through flesh. For an instant, I thought one of them had torn my Achilles tendon in half. I kicked back as Lena screamed.
I jumped.
Lena dug her fingers into my back. I would never let her go. As we tumbled through the air, I twisted my body so I would hit the water first. It was a long enough drop that landing could kill her.
The water felt like concrete as I hit it dead on. My ribs cracked, but I pushed past the pain. They would reknit themselves within the hour. Water sliced through me like a thousand tiny knives. Even in midsummer the river was cold. Lena slipped from my grasp.
The brutal current threatened to throw us miles from where we needed to be. It pulled Lena under, leaving only her auburn hair swirling above. I tore through the water and grabbed her by the wrist. Coughing and sputtering, she surfaced. Fierce determination gripped her as she fought against the raging waves.
Gathering her in one arm, I tore through the water with the other. Lena managed to reposition herself and slide her arms around my waist.
We didn’t just have the current to fight. Two of the Pack wolves had dived into the water with us. In their wolves, they were faster than me, rocketing through the water toward us.
“No!” Lena cried and I instantly knew her heart. She would let go. She’d let the water take her before she would succumb to either of them or the Pack again. I nipped her ear and let my thoughts and words fill her.
“You’re not dying today,” I hissed. “Hold on!”
She did. She sensed the change in me as my wolf struggled to get out. If I shifted with her this close to me, it would hurt her, maybe kill her. God, who was this woman to have put all her faith in me? There were a hundred ways she could die because of it. The Pack wolves gave chase because of me. The unforgiving current clawed at her as she hung on to me and kicked for all she was worth. The riverbank loomed ahead. There were no guarantees about what might await us on the other side.
There were no shifters native to Ohio. It was No Man’s Land between Michigan and Kentucky. Still, I knew the Pack often sent border patrols over the line in violation of a long-standing treaty between them and the Wild Lake wolves. And, no matter what else I was, I was a Kentucky wolf. A rogue shifter might try to shoot me on sight.
I kicked back hard as one of the wolves tried to sink his fangs into my leg. The blow caught him square in the jaw and down he went. He might drown. I hoped he did. But, it was just a distraction. His companion came around the other side. As I fought off one wolf, the other made a grab for Lena.
Gasping, she gave me a nod as best she could as she tried to swim. Treading water, I grabbed her waist and threw her forward as hard as I could. I prayed the wolf I’d kicked hadn’t had a chance to recover yet. If he got to Lena before I dispatched with the other, he’d kill her. I knew it in my heart. The Alpha wanted me. He was in my head enough to know hurting her was the best way to level the playing field between me and two betas.
“Fucking coward,” I yelled. “You’re too weak to face me yourself!”
No sooner had I said it than I felt Able’s presence. It was like a shotgun blast to the center of my back. Heat spread out and the pull began.
“No!” Lena screamed. She felt it the same time I did. Water filled my nose and sprayed in front of my eyes. I couldn’t see.
“Go!” I yelled to her. “Get across! Keep swimming!”
She did. She kicked her legs in a fury. Lena was maybe ten yards away from the shoreline. The other beta resurfaced maybe twenty feet from her. She dove beneath the water. My Lena was a strong swimmer. Thank God!
As I fought off the other wolf, she emerged near the foot of the Banchory Bridge. Covered in mud, she clawed her way up the embankment. She was safe for now.
The pull grew stronger. I felt nearly overcome with an overwhelming urge to just let go. It would be so easy to just stop swimming and float. The current would carry me far from Banchory. Maybe that was better for Lena.
You were born for me, Payne. The best you ever were was in my service. You know it’s the truth. Give in to it. No more suffering. No more fighting. Be who you were meant to be!
“No!” Lena’s scream cut through the air. It fueled me and gave me purpose. I kicked back once more. My foot hit one of Able’s betas square in the chest. I felt his ribs crack as he swirled away. Lena’s heartbeat reached me. Her pull was even stronger. I found the strength to cut through the water and reached the other side.