“I think even if you miss a few days on the pill it still works,” says Callie.
I shake my head. “No guarantees. Even missing one dose can throw the whole thing off. I’m going to have to remember to get a morning after pill.”
“Well, most people try for years and never manage to get pregnant. What are the chances?”
I glare at her. “About as good as getting pregnant the first and only time a guy fucks you on the hood of his car in a thunderstorm.”
She winces. “I was hoping you had forgotten about that.”
“Nope. That was a pretty memorable story.”
“I’m honestly surprised I haven’t heard anything yet about my license being revoked,” I say, changing the subject.
“Who says he actually called anyone? If Leo was as intimidating as you say, maybe Ted chickened out.”
“I don’t know. Ted isn’t the type to let someone humiliate him like that and get away with it. I can’t believe he would just drop it. Hell, he has been punishing me for years now because I wouldn’t go out with him in grad school. I don’t think he’s ever going to let that go.”
“Yeah, well, I said it then and I’ll say it again. Good choice. I learned the hard way to stay away from the rich, pampered types. Whatever happens though, you know I’m here for you. Damian and I both adore you. We’d never let anything happen to you.”
32
Leo
Marco Bianchi hugs me tightly and claps me on the back. He smells like cigarettes and booze, but I probably still smell like Julia’s pussy, so I give him a pass. I left prison with the clothes I walked in with and that was it, but a quick trip to the bank fixes that. I’ve been the best at what I do for as long as I’ve done it, and in my world, guys like me cost a premium. My own family doesn’t have much use for muscle anymore ever since Vince started steering them toward the straight and narrow, but I could’ve found a way to make myself useful if I had wanted.
My little brother Angelo is an ambitious hot-head though, and he stormed off to join the most fucked up, bloodthirsty family he could find. That’s how I ended up working for the Bianchis. I hate their guts, but I love my little brother, and I need to be around to keep an eye on him. So like it or not, I headed to the Bianchis after my session with Julia and got back to work.
We’re in the smoke-filled basement of Marco’s place where most of the higher-ups hang out. My little brother Angelo is over in the corner talking in low tones with Carlito. I wish Angelo wasn’t so fucking ambitious. All I really want to do is keep him out of trouble, but it seems like the only thing he wants to do is find it. I guess I can’t blame him. If I didn’t have him to worry about, I probably would’ve wound up in prison a long time ago for a lot longer stint by now.
I force myself to smile as I grease palms with the top guys of the Bianchi family. They’re all ancient, and you’d never guess how bloodthirsty they are by appearance. I appreciate a good fight and a cold stack of cash as much as the next guy, but I don’t ever confuse money for power like they do. Power is in the man, it’s in his core. It’s not in how you can throw your money around and get other people to do your dirty work. I have no respect for these men.
I interrupt Angelo and Carlito by clapping my little brother on the back. “The fuck are you two talking about over here?”
Anglo licks his lips, glancing at Carlito for approval. “We got wind of an opportunity, and we were thinking with you out of prison, we could actually pull it off on the side, without…” he glances toward the Bianchis. “You know.”
I discreetly make sure we’re out of earshot and signal for him to go on.
“The Morettis are getting involved in some big shit. They are sending shipments of weapons to cartels in Mexico, and it’s bringing in boatloads of cash.”
“And you want to get in on some of that cash?” I ask.
Angelo and Carlito nod, smiling. Angelo has my dark hair, but his features and body are softer. He’s never been as strong as me, and I think that always made him overcompensate by trying to do the craziest shit he can think of. Carlito is a young guy, maybe twenty, like Angelo. I can’t help seeing how bad they need me to look out for them when they smile up at me. How the fuck did they survive while I was in prison? The answer is they probably played it cool for a while, but they think with me behind them, they can pull off anything.
“How do you plan to keep the Bianchis from finding out?” I ask.
Angelo looks down. “We don’t have all the details worked out, but you can help us with that. You’re always good with that kind of thing.”
I smirk. It’s a stupid plan. It’s reckless, and if the Bianchis even catch the slightest whiff of it, they will be after our blood right beside the Morettis. But stupid plans have always been the most fun.
I wait in the parking lot outside Julia’s office, leaning on her car. I saw the keys to an Acura on her desk and there are only four cars in the lot, one of which happens to be an Acura, the same one I saw in the lot the day I met her. I thought I would be able to put her from my mind and move on after I got a taste of her pussy, but it has been two days and I’m still thinking about her constantly. Seeing her car here means she must not have lost her job after all. I’m surprised by how much that relieves me. I normally couldn’t care less. I get what I want from a woman and move on, even if I’ve left their life in chaos. This time…it feels different. I don’t think I realized it until now, but part of the reason I’ve been thinking so much about her is because I know I made her risk her career. I wanted to make sure she was still doing okay.
Seeing her car here means she’s fine. I could just leave and be done with it, but that’s not true. There’s still something hanging between she and I, something I can’t put my finger on. I want her.
I distract myself a little while I wait by thinking about Angelo’s plan. I did a little digging and found out that he’s right. The Morettis are being reckless as hell. They are driving unarmored cars from Texas to New Jersey with up to a hundred thousand cash, and they’re doing it on a regular, predictable basis. They’re practically begging to get ripped off. The only wrinkles are how to spend the cash without drawing their eye, and how to keep the Bianchis from finding out we were behind the robbery, because the Morettis will definitely point the finger at the Bianchis before any other family. It could be an easy payday, or it could be a bloodbath. But I like our odds.
She finally leaves the office almost an hour after I arrive. I straighten the wrinkles from my clothing. I’m wearing a white undershirt and a new Brione suit. I run a hand through my hair and smile at her. But she looks pissed to see me standing here. Her lips press angrily into a single, thin line and her eyebrows draw down as she approaches.
“You’ve done enough damage. Can’t you just leave me alone?” she says, trying to push past me to get into her car.
I put my hand on her waist, turning her so her back is against the car and our faces are inches apart. “I’ll leave you alone. As soon as I’ve got what I want.”
Her eyes roam my face, lips parting. I fucking love how quickly I can break through her anger, how badly she wants me even when she knows with every fiber of her being that she should stay away. “What do you want?” she breathes.
“I want to get to know you.”
She frowns in confusion, pushing me back a little. “No. No. Out of the question.”
“Then I’m not leaving you alone.”
“I had to scrape and beg to keep my job, and now Ted is holding what he saw against my career like a loaded gun. I make one wrong move and he can ruin my life. I’m not risking that again for you.”
I’m surprised by how much her words sting. Since when have women been able to say anything that bothered me? It’s always been so easy, so simple. I fuck them and forget them. No strings. No problems. Why can’t I just forget her?
“Give me one more chance. Dinner. I’m not your patient anymore. It’s not risking your job to have dinner with me.”
&n
bsp; She looks at me for a long time before grabbing her keys, opening the door, and sitting behind the wheel. I move inside the door, keeping her from closing it while I write my number on a gum wrapper from my pocket. I hold it out to her. “Call me when you change your mind,” I say.
33
Julia
It’s been a week since he gave me his number, a week and a few days since he sauntered into my life and left it in shambles. But every time I look at the stupid gum wrapper with his cramped handwriting on it, I can’t make myself throw it away. I can’t throw him away, even though I should. I think about him all day. I’m addicted to him and I keep waiting for the withdrawal to fade, but it only gets worse. My skin burns and aches for his touch again. I’m ashamed by how many times I’ve pleasured myself thinking about him since that day.
Leo.
I pour myself a cup of coffee and move to the kitchen table, idly tapping through my phone to read my newsfeed on Facebook.
His calloused hands roam my body, squeezing my breasts until it hurts.
I take a bite of my bagel and realize I didn’t even remember to put cream cheese on it. Ugh. I chew the tasteless bagel and try to keep my mind focused. I have a trying day ahead of me at work. Ever since Ted caught us…
His tongue swirls in my mouth and his cock moves inside me.
I clench my hand on my coffee cup and close my eyes. Stop it. Stop thinking about him. Stop remembering. I have way more important things to think about, like how I’m going to make this month’s rent and pay the three thousand dollar hospital bill for my mom’s chemo, or how I’m going to keep my sanity working for Ted when he knows he can literally end my career with a phone call.
I look at the gum wrapper again. I want to call him. Even if it’s just to tell him how much of an asshole he is one more time. Before I know what I’m doing, my fingers are flying over the numbers on my phone. It’s ringing. I stare at the phone in disbelief at first, slowly raising it to my ear and waiting. What are you doing? What the fuck are you doing?
“This is Leo,” he says through the phone. His voice is so much sexier than I remember.
“It’s me,” I say. “I just wanted to call to tell you to—”
“I missed you,” he says.
“Then why didn’t you come wait by my car again?” I ask. I feel the conversation spinning out of control again, like he can dictate the direction it will go by the force of his will alone. I’m supposed to be the psychologist. I’m the one with years of training in the human mind and how to control a conversation. I want to growl in frustration. None of that seems to help around him.
I can practically hear the smirk in his voice. “Would you like it if I did?”
“I would like it if you gave a shit about what you put me through.”
He pauses. “Is that why you called? Or do you want me to ask you out to dinner again?”
“What makes you think I want that?” I ask. As much as I want nothing more than to see him again, I’m stronger than that. I’m not going to beg him for it. I’ll take my pride over my desire if I have to.
“Because you haven’t stopped thinking about me,” he says. “You’re calling me a week after I gave you my number. That means you spent a week holding onto that little scrap of paper, trying not to call because you are pissed at me. You tried for an entire week and now...here we are. You must really want to see me again.”
I blush. Maybe he should have been a psychologist. “Well, it’s a good thing you’re not the psychologist here, because you’re completely off target. Want to know how badly I want to see you again?” I slam the phone down on the table and press end call.
I cradle my head in my hands, wanting to just scream. You’re losing it, Julia. You’re really losing it this time. The phone rings a few seconds later. It’s his number. I watch it, hand hovering over the phone. I know if I ignore it, this can all end, right here.
I’ve convinced myself that going out with him would be a failure, that it would be weakness. Maybe the truth is avoiding him would be the weak decision. Maybe all along I’ve been doing the cowardly thing by running from him and trying to cut him out of my life. I decided to own my mistake, but I’m never going to find any sort of closure about what happened unless I give Leo another chance. I need to do this, for myself, even if it might be dangerous.
I pick up the phone.
I’m wearing my sexiest dress when I meet him outside my apartment. Leo wears a coal-gray suit with a black dress shirt. His hair is pushed away from his face in a careless way that is irresistibly sexy. He has the kind of face that would look good with any hairstyle or no hair, even. His suit fits him perfectly, accentuating his broad shoulders and drawing lines that drive my eyes down his body. But tonight isn’t about fantasy. It’s not about re-living those moments we shared in my office. It’s not about us. It’s about moving on, closure, and a chance to face my mistake and move past it.
Still, when he looks me up and down and smiles appreciatively, I can’t help feeling my heart flutter.
“You look amazing,” he says.
“Thank you,” I say. I spent longer than I intended getting ready. It didn’t seem to matter how many times I told myself this wasn’t a date. I just wanted to look good. I’m allowed to want to look good when I go out in public, aren’t I? It doesn’t have to mean I’m trying to impress anyone. Then again, that doesn’t exactly explain why I wore my sexiest underwear, too.
Jersey City towers around us, blotting out the stars in the night sky, and the road is choked with red tail lights as people inch their way to their destinations. It’s an ugly, crude place, but it’s home for me now. I went to grad school here and fell in love with something about it. Even though it’s still a big city, it doesn’t have the same anonymous feel that New York always had to me, like I was a faceless body in the crowd. I know the cashier at the Goodwill and I know the kid who is always walking his dog by my place around the time I head out for the office. Something about it makes me feel more like I’m home than New York ever did.
“So where are we going?” I ask.
“A place nearby, come on, we’ll walk.”
He puts a possessive hand on my back and I hate how good it feels. We just walk through the city like it’s the most normal thing in the world, comfortable in each other's silence and at ease. I even begin to forget why I am so angry with him. Some of the psychologist in me comes out and I start wondering if maybe I’m just projecting my anger on him, blaming him for all the unfairness in my life.
We reach a small staircase that leads down under an awning. There’s a man in a suit standing outside who notices Leo and hurries inside immediately. Leo leads me down the stairs where we’re greeted by a maî·tre d’.
“Mr. Citrione! It has been too long,” says the balding man. He smiles wide, but his eyes dart from Leo to the street behind him. What is he looking for?
“We need a table for two,” says Leo.
“Of course, of course.” The maî·tre d’ leads us inside and snaps his fingers at two busboys, who hurry to clear a table for us. A small group of people waiting for a table give us ugly looks, but Leo doesn’t seem to notice. Did they just put us ahead of all these people because they are afraid of Leo? I follow Leo and the maî·tre d’ to our table, feeling more than a little anxious. Just how dangerous is he?
Leo pulls out my chair and helps me sit, taking his place across from me at the small round table. It’s a tablecloth and candle kind of place. Soft music washes over the room and the conversation is muted, but constant. Well-dressed waiters and waitresses sweep through the room with iced bottles of champagne and wine decanters resting against white cloths draped over their forearms. The menu only lists six items and I can’t even begin to decipher what they are. The language looks like French, but I can’t be sure.
“I told you this wasn’t a date,” I say. “You didn’t have to pick such a fancy place.”
“If it’s not a date, why did you spend so long making yourse
lf look so sexy?”
I clear my throat and adjust the napkin in my lap. “Look. If you want this to be more than just...physical, you’re going to have to stop.”
He frowns. “Stop what?”
I make a gesture toward him that isn’t even clear to me. “That. Whatever it is you do that makes it so hard for me to concentrate. You want the truth? Yes, I’m attracted to you. Yes, that was the best…” I lower my voice. “It was the best sex I’ve ever had.”
He licks his lips slowly, drawing my eye. Focus. Say what you came to say, Julia.
“We did this backwards. So no more sex, no more touching. If you want to keep seeing me, we need to start over. You tell me about you and I’ll tell you about me and we’ll go from there.”
He regards me calmy, eyes narrowed slightly. He shrugs. “Okay, so we start over, but I should warn you. I start pretty close to the finish line.”
The waiter saves me from having to respond to that by arriving with a bottle of wine. I know it’s expensive wine because he pours it in a decanter before filling our glasses. Leo orders for both of us, pronouncing the foreign words fluently and with a confidence that I can’t help but find attractive.
When the waiter leaves, Leo spreads his hands. “Well, Dr. Connors, seeing as you’re the psychologist here, what can you tell me about myself?”
I purse my lips. “You’re confident.” I say. “Some men pretend to be confident as a defense mechanism, a way to ward off potential danger. Others pretend for attention. Very few men actually are confident. You’re not pretending though, and I’m trying to figure out if it’s because you’re ignorant or dangerous.”
Savage: A Bad Boy Next Door Romance Page 19