by Sandy Loyd
“I can’t believe how hot it is. Certainly a change from London,” Mindy added.
“A nice change.” Penny wiped a trickle of perspiration off her forehead, unfazed with the heat. She loved it. “Sometimes I thought I’d never get warm, even in the middle of summer.”
She glanced up to note Parker’s gaze hadn’t moved, only now his expression appeared more inquisitive. When she lifted her chin as if in question, he smiled, eyes flashing something she couldn’t read.
“The air has more humidity,” he offered. “The rainy season is upon us now.”
Just the tone of his voice sent an unsettling spark of awareness through her. She hated that over the course of these past weeks, thoughts of the man had slowly taken over thoughts of Gerald Knightsbridge. That the thoughts of both men were of the same topic tormented her, and left her paralyzed with guilt. She’d been frozen with fear at the idea of having to mate with the earl, but the idea of mating with the man gazing at her now with humor-filled eyes had her shaking with another kind of fear—a fear of enjoying it, or worse, yearning for it. She closed her eyes, willfully pushing the images away and sent up a silent prayer.
Please, Lord. I only want to be that happy-go-lucky person I was a year ago. Back then, she’d had no worries about fighting men’s lust, had no idea such a thing even existed. Now she fought her own.
Inhaling deeply, she opened her eyes and glanced at Parker. “The rainy season,” she asked, raising a brow.
“We’re veering farther south, due to the warm currents. We’ll catch the Gulf Stream current taking us north once we cross to it. ’Tis much easier for the captain to ride the current at an angle than fight it,” he explained, gracing her with another knowing smile.
If only her stomach would cease with the flip-flops his smile created. The man was simply too masculine for words. Penny’s focus returned to her bowl. The sweet flavor of the molasses mixed in went down easily.
Done with her porridge, she then took a sip of coffee, a bitter brew she’d grown accustomed to, before beginning on her soft-boiled egg. A comment floated past her ears and she looked up. “Excuse me? I wasn’t paying attention.”
Parker chuckled. “I said I’m sorry you didn’t sleep well.”
Penny clenched a fist with the hand sitting on her lap. When fingernails digging into her palm became painful, she exhaled and relaxed her fingers.
Chin up, she met his gaze. “It was nothing but a case of homesickness,” she boldly proclaimed, daring him to deny it with her glare.
“Of course. I understand. Being away from home and in different surroundings makes one behave differently.”
Subduing the urge to throw more mental daggers, she smiled. “Sometimes it helps to be rudely awakened to the fact. Rest assured, my behavior will be a model of decorum from here on out.”
Jacques seemed to take note of both the exchange and the charged atmosphere suddenly pervading the table. His smiling countenance turned to Parker and though his manner was jovial, his voice held a hint of warning. “It seems we all behave differently when away from the home. Very few of us have the vow of a promise to keep us in line.”
Parker chuckled. Rising from the table, he nodded. “No worries, Jacques. I’ve no intention of breaking promises. I was just pointing out the obvious to the lady.” He turned and bowed, catching Penny’s focus and throwing her another mocking smile.
“Ladies,” he said, before sauntering off.
~~
Parker located his brother on the deck below the wheelhouse, enjoying a pipe and searching the horizon as he did most mornings after being relieved. The scent of the salty, fishy sea air mixed with the smell of Lucas’s burnt tobacco, a clean cherry flavor. He blew out another stream of white smoke that broke apart and instantly dissipated in the tropical breeze.
Since sailing into warmer waters, both men had donned the garb of the other sailors: a loose-fitting muslin shirt and baggy britches that could easily be rolled to the knees, allowing the breezes to keep them cool. Parker strode to the railing, absorbed with the tranquility, spying several dolphins frolicking and swimming with the ship as it glided through the calm seas.
“You seem content today,” Lucas said.
“Aye. I guess I am,” Parker replied honestly. He stared out at the blue-green depths as sights and sounds of sailing surrounded him. The ping of metal against metal clanged. One of the sails fluttered, then caught the stiff wind, filling it. The billowy white clouds floated in an azure sky and added to the tropical feel of the moist air blowing his hair about. He sighed. He did feel content just then. “I don’t know why, as I’m anxious to get home.”
In the days they’d been sailing, he hadn’t dismissed the miners’ ordeal from his mind. He’d tried to focus on their tragedy to figure out what he could do to help, rather than on other more disturbing people, namely one. The gnawing need because of a blue-eyed siren still ate at his gut, but observing Miss Layton’s unease during breakfast acted as a balm, soothing his burning desires somewhat. A small smile formed at the edges of his lips. That she suffered too cheered him.
“We’re making good time.” Lucas’s voice broke into his thoughts. “Unless we hit a storm, I don’t anticipate any delays.”
“Good, good,” he murmured distractedly, still thinking of the expression on her face when he left the dining room. She might not be so quick to torment him now that she knew of the consequences.
“So, do you know what your next case will be?”
The question caught Parker off guard. Turning toward Lucas, his smile died. “No. My last instructions held no clue,” he said, sighing.
“Why the sigh?”
Parker shrugged. “No reason.”
“Then why the sudden change in mood?”
He massaged the back of his neck with one hand and glanced back at the water. His voice carried on the breeze a moment later. “I’ve been thinking of quitting.”
Lucas’s bark of laughter drew Parker’s gaze. “You doubt my intention?”
“Yes. I can’t see you quitting. You’ve been a marshal too long not to miss it if you quit.”
Parker eyed Lucas thoughtfully. His comment rang true. He’d worked for the US government in one capacity or another since his teens. “It does seem like part of me, but lately it’s a part I’ve come to hate,” he whispered honestly a moment later, glancing away. He just couldn’t stop thinking of the miners and their families. Even though he’d accomplished much, he’d also been very lucky. Somehow, he knew it was time to take up a different cause.
He’d been a fifteen-year-old heading into adulthood when the mine accident killed his father and left his family destitute. Not long after, Parker had learned the army paid well for needed information and had offered his services to work undercover for the Union Army before the War between the States. He’d been damned good at spying. Back then, there was nothing he wouldn’t do if he could make money to send home, no matter the risk. Over the course of the war, he’d amassed a small fortune from his mercenary work, as his extraordinary skills hadn’t come cheap. After all, he’d had a family to provide for and he could no longer allow men of means and position to take advantage of him or his talents.
A slight smile touched his face, thinking of all that he’d be giving up. “Remember when we first started out? Damn, how I loved outwitting not only those I spied on, but those who paid me to spy,” he said wistfully.
Lucas gave a ready grin. “Aye. Father trained us well in the few years we had him.” Lucas had done much the same type of work as Parker during the later years of the war, but he’d done his on the water.
The elder Davis began teaching all his boys when they were toddlers most of the skills that came in handy for spying. Both he and Lucas could track and hunt anything without their prey even being aware of being stalked. The brothers could live off the land, taking what they needed for survival, leaving no trace of their earlier presence.
“It was a challenge back then to make mo
ney and stay alive. A good game I enjoyed playing.” More memories surfaced, as if he’d experienced them all yesterday rather than years ago.
Being born poor gave Parker an added edge in dealing with the foot soldiers he was sent to spy on. He understood them, blending in effortlessly and becoming one of them, because most were no better off than he’d been at one time, fighting for a cause that others who had more to lose held dear. But he could also change his personality and become the landed gentry, effectively imitating those men he hated because of his mother’s tutelage, also started at an early age. He became a master of disguise, a chameleon readily changing to suit his environment, all the while learning the South’s secrets for his government—a government that paid well for those secrets.
“It’s been a lucrative means of survival.” His thoughts shifted to all he’d acquired in the past seventeen years, including a sprawling farm along the Chesapeake Bay, outside Baltimore, an easy ride from Washington, DC. He’d hired a manager, placing his family there, ensuring their safety and well-being while he worked as an agent.
“True,” Lucas agreed, nodding. “We’ve done well for a couple of boys from the coal mines of western Pennsylvania. I’m certainly not complaining.”
“Neither am I.” Parker grunted. “My work has given me the means to provide for the family, my most pressing need when Father died.”
He broke off and watched the dolphins play, still chasing the ship. They seemed so carefree, a luxury he’d never enjoyed.
When the war had ended, along with the need for his special talents, he’d tried his hand at riverboat gambling. Using the same skills of reading people without letting them read him and riding the big paddleboats up and down the rivers of America, also doing undercover jobs now and then for his government, he’d amassed even more money.
Gambling hadn’t interested him for more than a couple of years, however. Looking for ways to increase his small fortune after winning a ship in a poker game, Parker had talked his brother into going into business with him, using Lucas’s love of the sea for another type of risky venture, trading for monetary gain. With Parker’s money and Lucas’s cunning for bartering and trading, their lucrative partnership had lasted almost a decade. For too many years Parker had been happy to let Lucas sail the seven seas, increasing their wealth while he worked in an official capacity as a US marshal for President Grant.
“You’re right, though. I’m rarely in Maryland to enjoy my home.” He leaned into the railing, wondering why it mattered after so long. “I have no real complaint, except my work doesn’t seem to be enough anymore,” Parker added, keeping his gaze on the water. For the first time since he’d begun taking risks, he was no longer satisfied and realized he was ready to quit something he’d done his entire adult life. Why he felt this way, he wasn’t sure. But disillusionment had filled him for months now. He turned back to Lucas and said honestly, in an effort to answer his own questions, “Maybe I will miss some aspects, but the job has changed and no longer holds my interest. I believe it’s time to get out.” He didn’t add that maybe it was also time to do something about the Sterlings of the world.
Startled, Lucas glanced at Parker’s face and his demeanor sobered. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
Parker nodded. “I’ve yet to work with another partner I’m comfortable with since losing Harrington. Those boys they keep sending me are so wet behind the ears, I find myself watching over them and I don’t like babysitting. Sooner or later, someone’s going to get killed. I’d really rather it not be me. Then, there’s my last case. To think I’ve wasted months being in a country I hate, only to find the culprit was nothing other than a spurned man who loved another man makes me cringe. I simply want something more from life.”
“I didn’t realize you felt so strongly.” Lucas expelled a soft whistle, shaking his head.
“Funny, but until this very moment, neither did I.”
“So, you’re just quitting?” he asked with skepticism in his voice.
Shrugging, Parker’s gaze moved unseeing over the various shades of blue in the water. “I don’t know. I am thinking along those lines, and the more I do, the more quitting seems to be my next logical step. Still, it does seem a bit drastic.”
“Aye, drastic seems an understatement,” Lucas agreed. After a moment spent watching him, he asked, “Have you thought about what you’ll do if you quit?”
“A little. Right now I have this driving need to go home. Maybe after a few months there, I’ll feel differently yet again.”
“At least you have a beautiful home to return to.”
“Do I hear wistful yearning? What happened to ‘my home is the sea’?” he teased, adding a little levity to their conversation.
Lucas offered a sheepish smile and admitted, “There are those times I need to find another home. If you’re planning on staying put in Maryland for several months, I could be persuaded to visit.”
“Oh?” Parker’s eyebrows shot up in interest.
“Aye. I’ve one more scheduled trip to England. Then, this ship needs some maintenance. I’ve been wondering what to do during the months in between.”
“You know you’re always welcome. It would be nice for all of us to be together for more than a few days.” Parker’s smile grew wider. Movement caught his eye and he noticed another group of dolphins cavorting with the original three and racing along with the boat. An omen.
“I was thinking much the same thing,” Lucas said.
“Mother will be excited to see you for an extended visit.” The playful dolphins swam in front of him for a reason. “So will the girls.”
Lucas grunted and moved to fill his pipe. After lighting it and taking a puff, he said, “You’d better not let Mother in on the fact that you’re thinking of quitting before you figure out what you want to do, or she’ll have your life mapped out for you in no time.”
“Why do you think I seldom go home or stay very long when I do?” Parker grinned at the image his brother brought forth of the vibrant woman who’d raised them. Elizabeth Davis was the rock that cemented his foundation, never letting him falter in times of despair and heartache. Her belief in him and her encouragement to do what he had to do in order to live with his grief over losing his father and brothers was as crucial to his success as his hatred of men like Sterling, who were born wealthy and made more money on the backs of others. He knew there would be a day when he’d do something to avenge his father and brothers’ deaths. It seemed that time was fast approaching. Otherwise he might end up just like his nemesis. Greedy and uncaring.
“Same reason I sail.” Lucas’s reply drew his focus. “Is she still trying to marry you off?”
“Yes. And it’s getting damned annoying.” Parker snorted, his thoughts returning to his mother who never stopped mothering, despite his role in providing her a home and sustenance as a teenager. Unfortunately, her mothering included a need to see him settled, which accounted for the dozens of women she’d foisted off on him these past years. “I wish she’d concentrate on you for a while.”
Lucas chuckled and took another puff on his pipe, his amused gaze meeting Parker’s. “Mother knows I love the sea and would never be happy for long without it. But you, as the oldest, she has aspirations for and wants to see the grandchildren only you would provide.”
“Rebecca and Sarah will satisfy that need in no time I’m sure,” Parker said dismissively.
“You know she won’t be truly content until she sees all of us married, tied with a ball and chain, along with a dozen children.”
Parker bit back a laugh. No exaggeration there. “Her matchmaking ways, along with her ‘eligible brides,’ drive me to distraction. Maybe if Catherine became serious about someone, it would take the heat off me for a change.”
“I thought Catherine was interested in some gentleman from Baltimore?”
“She was,” Parker grumbled.
“He didn’t offer for her?”
“He did and by then he no
longer held her interest.”
“Well, don’t expect help from her,” Lucas said, chuckling. “She’s as bad as us with her fickle ways.” Lucas remained quiet for a moment, lost in thought. A comfortable silence surrounded the two brothers for several minutes, intruded upon only by the soft sound of the water splashing against the bow of the ship now and then. “You know you really should reconsider marriage. Maybe that’s what’s missing in your life.”
“Damn, you sound just like Mother.” Parker gave a self-deprecating laugh and shook his head. “It’s not something I want anymore.”
“All women aren’t like Lady Margaret.”
Parker’s back stiffened. He really didn’t want to think of Lady Margaret and her perfidy. He’d gotten over the lady’s treachery, but he wasn’t about to put his feelings on the line for another woman. Love was a fairy tale…a dream that never came true. Women like Elizabeth Davis didn’t exist. He now understood what women were really like, his sister included. The ones he’d come into contact with weren’t much better than Lady Margaret, each trying to marry the most suitable man, suitable meaning the one who brought the most to the table. “Doesn’t matter. She taught me a valuable lesson.”
“Because you fell in love with her and she didn’t deserve it? It’s been five years. If you were willing to marry her, why not think about marrying someone more deserving?”
“Are you sure Mother hasn’t been coaxing you?” Parker laughed. “I’m perfectly happy without a wife. What about you? Maybe you should take your own advice.”
“I like the ladies too much to settle down with just one.” Lucas grinned.
He grunted in reply and remained silent. Finally he asked, “So you say we’re making good time? When do you anticipate our arrival?”
“Six or seven days, maybe more if we encounter a storm. Certainly no longer than ten days.”
“I’ll be glad to be home.”
“I take it you’ve lost interest in our passenger?”
“I’m plenty interested in her, especially her secrets.”
“Well, you’ve done a good job hiding the interest and haven’t given me any reason to worry since we talked.”