Faith shook her head. She got that. She knew what Jason did was important. He’d explained it, but he’d also told her he was an executive, that his job wasn’t actually dangerous. He’d explained about the trailer… and the plane… and getting shot going after Hit. He’d said he’d protect her. He’d promised, but was that the reality she was living in? She didn’t hear the door open or the footsteps behind her. She stared at Tori, lost in a terrified realization.
Finally, she asked, “No… how do you do it? You have three babies and one on the way. How do you get up every day and know someone could come after you or your children because of what Jacob does? What would happen to Reece and me if Jason had been killed… or if we’d both been killed? What would happen to my baby? What if I can’t do this? I’m so scared.”
“Faith.” Jason’s voice spun her. His arms pulled her into him and belted her to his chest. Faith lost what little composure she had. Words and voices spun around her. Conceptually she knew the people around her left with murmured words of support, but the only thing she could focus on was the man holding her. He lifted her and carried her to the couch where he sat holding her in his lap.
She didn’t know how long they sat together, just holding each other, but it seemed he needed to touch her as much as she needed to be held by him.
“I love you. Please, talk to me.” Jason’s words were laced with an emotion he’d only let her hear once before, when he was talking about his dad.
Faith ran her hand up the lapel on his hand-stitched suit. “I’m afraid.”
“I know. I could have lost you. Those bastards got too close.” Jason kissed her forehead.
She pulled back, cradled in his strong arms. “I’m afraid for you, too. What if I lost you? What are we going to do to keep all of us safe? Including you?”
Jason’s hand traveled up and down her back. The silence stretched but wasn’t uncomfortable. She’d learned to wait for him to work through his responses. He said it was the lawyer in him, but in moments like this, she knew it was his insecurities that forced him to examine his words from every angle.
“I’m going to take a page out of Gabriel’s book. You and Reece will have protection, just not the personal security officers you would normally have. I’m pulling a team from Jacob to watch over you, not just because of the current threat, but because of me, specifically, my position at Guardian. I didn’t think I needed it, that we would need it. Even after the explosion and the tampering on the aircraft, I resisted that level of security, although Gabriel suggested it. I won’t make that mistake again. You and Reece are the most important things in my life. If it means keeping you, I’ll walk away from Guardian. I have a few months left in my commitment to Gabriel, but if it would make you feel better… I’ll leave.”
She searched the emotion in his green eyes. “I don’t know what needs to happen, Jason. Your job is important to you, and it is a part of who you are. I love you. Reece loves you. We wouldn’t be whole without you. But the job you do isn’t what I understood it to be, or maybe I just wasn’t listening, or if I was, I didn’t understand the risks. Tori said there was something big coming?”
Jason blinked several times and started to speak, but stopped. Finally, he shook his head and blew out a long breath before he spoke. “Guardian has committed to an event that may take years to rectify. We are going to wage a war against a criminal organization that has tentacles with global reach. But we have access to the law enforcement organizations of our country and other countries around the world. I won’t tell you more than that. I can’t.”
She tried to wrap her mind around the enormity of what he said. But everything boiled down to the same question. “Are you in danger?”
“No more than I was today or yesterday. But from now on, no one will be able to get near us.” Jason ran his fingertip over her forearm in a lazy circle, sending comforting sensations through her body. She watched his finger trace the pattern up and down her arm. The small, reassuring touch grounded her and affirmed how well he knew her.
She bit her lip to stop it from trembling. She whispered, “I’m not sure I can do this, Jason.”
She felt his body tense and his eyes snapped toward her. “‘This’ meaning us or ‘this’ meaning my job?” She saw the pain in his eyes; the fear of losing her and Reece was right there for her to see.
Faith leaned into him and tucked under his chin. Being this close to him made her feel safer. “‘This’ meaning people attacking us, having people try to blow us up. You were shot, Jason. You made light of it, but if he’d aimed differently? You’d be gone. I’m not sure I can do any of this. I’m not like Tori, I don’t have her strength. I’m afraid, and I don’t like it.”
“I guess all the questions and the fears boil down to a single point. Do you love me enough to trust that I’ll take care of you and Reece?” She could hear his heart pounding under her ear. The rapid timpani of his heartbeat told her more than the calm words had conveyed. He was afraid, too.
She pushed into the hard bulk of her man and wrapped her arms around him. “I love you. With everything I am, I love you.”
“Do you trust that I will take care of you and Reece?” His voice rumbled, vibrating his chest under her ear.
The image of Jason standing in front of Helena’s trailer with a team of gun-wielding mercenaries flashed in her mind. She placed her hand over his bicep where the bandage still wrapped around a bullet he’d taken while trying to protect their future. The all-too-vivid memory of him putting his body in front of hers, backing her out of the lobby of the theater, rolled in slow motion. He’d done nothing but keep her safe. She nodded and gripped his lapel harder. “I do.”
He palmed the side of her head and held her to his chest. “Thank God.” His barely whispered prayer of thanksgiving and the way he held her conveyed how much he needed her simple affirmation.
“I have an inherently dangerous job. Because of what my organization is doing, the danger has increased. I have taken steps to ensure both you and Reece are taken care of should something happen.”
“I don’t want to think about that. Jason, please… make all this go away.”
“I can’t. We are going to have to take this one day at a time.”
“Then make me forget about it. Just for a little while.”
“That I can do.” Jason lifted them both off the couch and carried her into the bedroom. Jason removed her clothes, his innate gentleness with her as always in complete opposition to his massive size and strength. He laid her on the bed and covered her with his body. His warmth infused her, finally warming the cold that had somehow gripped her core until this moment. His bulk flexed and rolled under her hands as he kissed or caressed her body. His tender possession kindled a small flame that slowly grew into a fire deep in her core. His mouth sought out her breasts. The deep pull of suction nearly brought her off the bed in pleasure.
She clutched his hair, holding him against her, silently begging for more. “Please, Jason. I need you inside me.”
He lifted to her mouth and kissed her, his tongue searching, tasting and probing. Faith pulled away only when breathing became a necessity. Jason stared down at her, and the depth of his love shone in his eyes. He lifted her legs to his shoulders, his cock hard and hot against her opening.
“I love you.” Her words seemed to release him, and he pushed forward, his girth splitting her, creating a delicious friction of pleasure. The intensity of their emotions and the delicious heat of the moment drew her closer to her climax.
“Please, Jason… I….”
He dropped his lips to hers, “I’ve got you, babe.” He lifted to his knees and pulled her to him, spreading her legs over his thighs. His hands ran up the inside of her legs and his hand ended up resting on her lower abs. He slowly pulled out while his thumbs started circling her clit with a mind-numbing pressure.
Thousands of electric tendrils hummed across her nerves, and with each slow thrust into her body, her mind slipped further
and further away from reality until nothing mattered but the need that welled up from deep inside her. Faith chased the sensations, her fingernails raking down his forearms. “Please, I need more.”
Jason dipped down, slid his arms behind her back and pulled her up so she was straddling his legs, his cock impaling her in his kneeling position. His mouth found her breast as he lifted her and thrust his cock deep inside her. Faith gasped and clung to his rock-hard shoulders. “Yes! Oh God, do that again!”
She felt him smile against her skin before he lifted off his heels. Faith wrapped her legs around him and arched backward. Her body stiffened and the world became a pinpoint of pleasure before it erupted. Faith clung to Jason as he held her steady while his hips slammed his cock into her core. His arms tightened, holding her against his body. His neck muscles bulged when he reared back and roared with his release. Faith’s breath caught in her chest at the sight of Jason lost in his own rapture. He folded her against him and carefully untangled their legs before he lay them down.
“I don’t deserve you.” Faith brushed his sweat-dampened hair from his brow. The intensity of his words stilled her hand.
“You deserve better.” She believed that with all her heart.
“You are more precious than I can explain. You and Reece are the reason my heart beats. I existed like a ghost drifting through my life, looking for a way to hide from everyone. You took one look at me and saw what no one else did.”
“I saw the other half of my soul.” Faith drifted her fingers across his lips.
Jason lifted up on his elbow and pushed her hair out of her face. “Tomorrow the official will come here and marry us. We are leaving immediately afterward, heading to the safest place in the world. Reece will love it.”
“Where are we going?” The way his eyes lit up, it had to be a special place.
“I’m keeping it as a surprise,” he taunted.
“Oh, we are going to be like that, are we?”
“We are.”
“Seriously, tell me.”
“I’m taking you home to meet my mom. They weren’t due to fly here until tomorrow morning. I called and told her to stay, that we would be coming to her.”
“To the ranch? Do you… Will she like us?”
“You need to stop asking that question. She’ll love you.”
“Promise?” God, what would she do if Jason’s family didn’t like her?
“Cross my heart, princess. It wouldn’t matter if they didn’t. I love you, and you are my world.”
Faith launched up and pushed him over onto his back. His laughter lightened her heart. She was his world. The thought freed the worries she held. She tickled his ribs and doubled her effort when he actually jumped at her playful attack. “Oh, you are so mine! Surrender, Superman!” One huge hand gathered both of hers and she was on her back in the blink of an eye.
“I surrendered to you the first time I saw you, soaking wet trying to keep a hyper dog, a little boy and yourself out of the mud.” He dropped for a sweet kiss that lingered like a breath against her lips.
“Go to sleep, princess. Tomorrow you become my queen.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Jason followed his nose through the massive ranch house to the kitchen where the delectable aroma of fresh-baked cookies originated. His mom had Reece on a chair at the counter so he could help her finish what appeared to be at least the twentieth batch of peanut butter cookies.
“Now what do we do?” Amanda asked Reece.
“Crisscross it with the fork, Gramma.” Reece beamed a smile at Jason’s mom. Jason swallowed hard at that happy smile.
“That’s right. Dip it in the sugar, then press.” Amanda glanced over her shoulder at Jason and winked.
Reece turned with her. “Daddy! Look, we made cookies. We had to make a lot ‘cause Uncle Dicks and Uncle Drake eats a lot.” Jason laughed at Reece’s continued mispronunciation of Dixon’s name. Drake had gotten hours of entertainment out of Reece’s inability to say his brother’s name. Go figure, mentally the twins were only two or three years older than Reece anyway.
Frank came into the kitchen, grabbed Reece from the chair and slung him over his shoulder. Reece shrieked and giggled as he hung upside down over his grandpa’s back. “Come on boy, ole Lightning needs someone to exercise her.”
Frank grabbed a handful of cookies and kissed Amanda soundly on the lips before he hitched a laughing four-year-old up more securely and nodded to Jason. “See ya.”
The laughter of both man and boy as they left the ranch house echoed in the air, infusing a lighthearted feel into the room.
“He is such a good boy. Faith has done a fantastic job raising him.” Amanda picked up the fork from the counter where Reece had dropped it and finished scoring the top of the cookies.
Jason grabbed a couple of the cookies and leaned against the counter, watching his mom do something he’d seen a hundred times growing up. “She has. Mom, can I talk to you about something?”
Amanda paused and looked over her shoulder at him. Her eyebrows arched and she nodded. “Anything, you know that, honey.”
Jason looked down at the cookies in his hand. The one in his mouth turned to dust as he tried to speak the words he’d asked himself a million times. “How… I mean, would…” Jason blinked away the tears that formed in his eyes and swallowed several times to force back the emotion that threatened to overtake his need to finally ask his mother for forgiveness. He looked up at the ceiling. God, what would she do? How could she?
A warm hand pulled his attention down and to his mom, who stood directly in front of him. “What is it, Jason? What do you need to ask me?” Amanda cupped his cheek and he leaned into it. When she found out, would she ever touch him like this again?
“The night Dad was killed.” Jason closed his eyes at the flash of pain reflected in his mom’s. “It was my fault. It was our night. I wanted to go to the movies with the guys. If I hadn’t gone with them to a damn show, he’d be alive.” Jason drew a deep breath and opened his eyes. His mom had tears in hers and she was shaking her head. Fuck, he knew it. She didn’t know.
“Oh, baby. No. Oh God, have you been living with this since your dad died?” Amanda pulled him into her arms and ran her hands up and down his back like she used to do when he was upset as a kid. “Jason, your dad called me. We were going to go out, but I asked him to swing by Mr. Jensen’s farm and pick up a crate of blueberries he’d put aside for me. He was on his way there when he saw the car that had been reported stolen. He pulled the guy over and he was killed. You didn’t do anything wrong, baby. Sometimes life isn’t fair, but nothing we did made that bastard do what he did.” Jason stiffened. That was the second time in his life he’d heard his mom swear.
“If I hadn’t gone to the movie…”
“What ifs and wishes, baby. If Joseph hadn’t switched weeks with you, if your dad hadn’t wanted to have blueberry pie the next day, if it was raining, if… if… if. The only ‘if’ I’m willing to entertain is if you’d told me all those years ago, I would have been able to tell you it wasn’t your fault.” She pulled away and cupped his cheeks with both of her hands. “Do you understand?”
Jason took a moment. He’d forgotten that he and Joseph had switched weeks. That explained so much about the way Joseph lost it, of what he did and what he had become. “Joseph?”
Amanda nodded. “He has always blamed himself.”
“But he had nothing to do with what happened.” Jason pulled his glasses off and pinched the bridge of his nose.
“And neither did you.” Amanda’s soft reprimand held iron.
“I’d like to believe that, Mom.”
“Believe it. I do. While I miss your dad, the love we had, and I regret the fact my children lost their father, we can’t live in the past. Look what you have right here and now—a beautiful wife and a little boy who adores you. Living with the shadow of what might have been is a poisonous, lonely life. Don’t bring that into what you have now. There i
s no need and there is no blame.”
Jason nodded and sniffed back the tears that hadn’t fallen. He pulled his mom into a hug and she squeaked when he flexed that hold just a little bit. He laughed and allowed her to step back.
“Son, you do not know your own strength.” Amanda sniffed the air and spun. “Oh no! The cookies!” She pulled the cookie sheets out of the oven and breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness! Grab that plate of cookies over there and head over to the office. Chief, Dixon and Drake haven’t had any yet. Keelee and Faith just took two plates to the clinic, so you only have to play deliveryman once.”
Jason snorted. “You’re lucky I have to go over there for a video conference, otherwise I’d balk at being your delivery boy.”
“Oh, that’s right, you’re the CEO now. Well, let me tell you something, mister, you are never too old or too good to do a favor for your mother.” Amanda pointed her spatula at him, but the smile on her face voided any attempt at a scolding.
Jason grabbed the foil-covered plate and started toward the door. He paused as he reached for the handle. “Hey, Mom?”
Amanda looked over and made eye contact with him. “Yeah, baby?”
“I love you.” Jason opened the screen door and walked out. His mother’s voice trailed after him, “Never more than I could love you, Jason.”
Epilogue
“Daddy! Look at me!”
Mike White Cloud glanced across the compound to the corral. Jason’s little boy was riding a Welsh pony. Both the boy and the pony preened as Reece rode the sweet old gelding.
“I see you, buddy. Great job. Make sure you listen to Grandpa.” Jason King’s deep, raspy voice carried across the open space. The boy waved and immediately returned his attention to Frank Marshall, who sat on the corral fence and watched his grandson. Chief felt the older man’s pride and satisfaction a football field away.
Jason (Kings of Guardian #4) Page 21