by Quinn, Taryn
“What are we going to do about this?” he interrupted.
Which was even worse than the last thing he’d said.
I narrowed my eyes. “If that means what I think it means, we aren’t doing anything. I’ve already made up my mind to have this baby. You don’t have to be involved. Judging by your reaction thus far, it may be better if you aren’t.”
God, that hurt to say. But it was better than risking him hurting our child with callousness.
He puffed out a frosty breath. “It’s freezing out here.” He glanced at me and gripped my arm. “Your coat isn’t even buttoned. Let’s get inside.”
I shook him off. “Perhaps we shouldn’t discuss this now. Your nephew was just born this evening. If we’re going to say cross words, maybe this isn’t the time.”
“Cross words?” Even without looking at him, I knew he had cocked that damn eyebrow. “Am I wrong in thinking we’re equal participants in this, or does one of us have a right to be angry and I missed it?”
“Don’t take that paternalistic tone with me. You’re the one who blamed our child on Seth and then asked what we were going to do, as if this is a problem to be taken care of. Sorry that I don’t view my baby the same way a Hamilton does a piece of property.”
He removed his hand from my arm. “You’re hearing me all wrong.”
“Oh, I’m hearing you wrong. You aren’t saying the wrong things, it’s just my interpretation.” Typical.
Jeez, maybe he was even partially right in this case. At this moment, anything other than joy from him felt like a dismissal. A denial. I couldn’t deal with it, not when I was this vulnerable and determined to protect the fragile life growing inside me.
The life I had just barely found out about. These feelings were all so new and jagged.
“Let’s go inside.” His voice had cooled substantially.
I understood this was a shock. It hadn’t been a stroll through the park for me either. But if he thought I’d give him an inch when it came to the welfare of my kid, nope. He was liable to say things he might not mean once he’d had time to think, but sometimes first reactions came from the gut.
And my gut said to protect my child at all costs.
“We don’t have to talk about this tonight, if you need some time to process.” I planted my feet and gazed straight ahead at his snow-covered Porsche.
A Porsche, for God’s sake. That was the kind of money he had. My parents had done well for themselves before they’d chucked it all to live in a home on wheels, but this was next level. His home was fancier than I was used to, as was this cabin most likely, though it looked quite rustic from the outside. Still, this was a Hamilton property, so it had to be nice.
“Do you want that badly to get away from me?”
His quiet question tore open a hole inside my chest, as did the way he’d tucked his hands in his jacket pockets.
I missed holding his hand. We seemed to hold hands as often as we could, whenever we were alone. Even when we were just watching the late news before crawling into bed.
“No,” I returned, equally quietly. “I came here tonight to apologize and to tell you about the baby, but not only for those reasons. I wanted to be with you. Didn’t I make that clear?”
“Not so much, no.”
I pressed my lips together and tried not to shiver. Whether it was from the chill outside or the worry closing in on me from all sides, I didn’t know.
“Come in,” he murmured, motioning me forward. He must’ve seen me quaking like the last leaf in a storm.
Not exactly the image of strength I wanted to project.
I followed him up the steps to the porch because I owed him that much. And God, I did not want to be alone with my thoughts. Not tonight.
He unlocked the door and nudged me inside, turning on lights as we went. I couldn’t help letting out a gasp.
If there was a living embodiment of cabin porn, this was it.
A huge, rough-hewn fireplace appeared as if it had been carved out of the rock and inlaid with a polished black marble mantel. The floors were wide-planked and glossy pine, shined to a sheen Mr. Clean would’ve approved of. A large flat-screen took up half of one wall and long forest-green sunken leather couches were paired with matching armchairs. They surrounded a coffee table made of the same marble as the hearth. A soft rug stretched out in front of the fire, and stubby candles of different colors and widths seemed to be everywhere.
The room practically screamed “cozy winter hideaway”, and my inner real estate stager’s heart did a little dance of joy.
“Who designed all this?”
Rather than answer my question, he went to the laptop set on top of a rolling ottoman that matched the rest of the furniture. He unplugged something from the side and then went around the room lighting candles, as if this was any other night.
As if this was the Valentine’s Day we had missed sharing.
“What are you lighting those with?” I followed him around the room, watching him touching the wand to each of them. “How did you get fire from your computer?”
“USB lighter.” He showed me, and I was more intrigued than I should’ve been.
Let no one say I am not easily amused.
Once they were all lit and the room seemed to be shimmering with dozens of tiny flames, he shed his jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, baring the heavily tattooed forearms that didn’t seem to go with his austere personality.
Mercy, they were hot as hell.
Seth had a similar number of tattoos, though his were more colorful, and Oliver’s featured denser, darker ink. Not many hues at all. Which fit the man far too well. If one believed the image he put out to the world, in any case.
Over the last few weeks, I’d begun to see there was much more to him than met the eye. The problem was we kept reverting to our old, well-worn roles. Where we were adversaries, on opposite sides about everything. I didn’t know if I dared lower my walls where he was concerned, but I had to try.
For my baby, I would risk more. And if he slammed the door shut, well then, I would face that as well.
He tossed a couple of logs on the fire and crouched to get it going, handling the task with an economy of movement that made his shoulders ripple under his shirt. His ass clenched too thanks to the position, which I might not have noticed if I hadn’t been right behind him and already halfway to being physically compromised. Apparently, my libido had no issues with him whatsoever. Or maybe I could blame pregnancy hormones kicking in early. Or many years of denial. Whatever the reason, I was licking my lips when he turned back to me.
My expression must’ve given me away. He stopped short, his brow furrowing as he reached up to loosen his tie. That move did not help my unwanted state of arousal. Just the quick flicks of his fingers as he pulled the fabric apart made my belly tremble in a way that had nothing to do with the cold.
I needed to be on guard until I knew his exact position. His phrasing outside hadn’t been the best, and for all I knew, things might only go downhill from there.
Instead, I was getting wetter than a Slip ’N Slide with a self-activated hose.
“This cabin was built by my father for one of his mistresses.” Casually, he rolled up his sleeves as he looked around the wide-open space. “Once they ended, the place was rarely used. It fell into disrepair, and last year I started coming here when I needed time to think. Little by little, I started tinkering. Making changes to suit me and my needs.”
“Tinkering?” I couldn’t keep the shock out of my voice. “You did some of this yourself?”
“Most.” He shrugged. “I needed help with some of the wiring, plumbing, and finishing work. But I enjoyed tearing it apart and fitting it back together exactly how I envisioned.”
I gaped at him. “Manual labor? You?”
“You’d be surprised all the things you don’t know about me.”
“Then tell me some of them. I’m standing right here listening.”
He p
ushed a hand through his hair, now dotted with snow. “Seth and I have other siblings. A brother and a sister. We’ve never met them. Until last year, Seth didn’t even know of their existence.”
“From your mother?” I guessed.
He nodded. “Yes, she remarried. Whole new family, whole new life.”
“Are you going to ever meet them? See her again?”
Just as quickly, he shook his head. “I have no desire to see her. Ever. I closed that chapter a long time ago, not long after our father paid her off to leave us.”
“What?” I whispered. “That can’t be so. What mother would accept money to give away access to her children?”
His laughter was harsh. “Oh, you’d be surprised. Ours did, and Laurie’s did. Quite easily, in fact. Neither took a backward glance.”
My throat clogged with emotion. For the little boys he and Seth had been, growing up without their mother. For Laurie, who’d truly found her mother in Ally.
He stepped toward me and ran his fingers over my wrist beyond the sleeve of my coat and along the back of my hand. Awareness prickled in his wake. “So, if you think your ferocious defense of our child is going to drive me away, you’re so very wrong.”
Our child. Just those words sent my heart tumbling.
“I-I wasn’t going to demand you be a part of the kid’s life.” As soon as the statement was out, I rued my loose tongue. Why couldn’t I just shut up and let the man speak?
Because you’re afraid to believe him. If you do and he pulls the rug out from under you, it’ll be so much worse.
“No?” His hand fell away. “What were you going to demand? Timely support payments then?”
“I don’t need your money.”
“You don’t, do you? Because you have that money squirreled away from the sale of the bed-and-breakfast, and though you would never spend it on yourself, a child is a different matter.” He made a noise in his throat as I averted my gaze. “Thought so. How is it I can guess your motivations so succinctly, and you’re so often off-base about mine? Is this a Women Are from Mars, Men Are from Venus situation?”
I couldn’t help laughing at his mangling of the title of that book. That I may or may not have read. Eleven times. “You try having pregnancy hormones on top of your normal crazy and see how you act.”
His expression softened and my throat went tight all over again. “You’re certain?”
Swallowing deeply, I nodded. “Three tests don’t lie.”
“Three.” His Adam’s apple rose and fell. “Were you feeling sick?” He frowned. “You should sit down.”
“I’m fine. Though I wouldn’t protest a cup of tea.”
“Sorry. I’ll stock some on my next trip to the market.” I couldn’t tell if he was teasing me as he took my hand and led me to the couch. “How did you know to take the tests?”
“Morning sickness a few days this week. Enough fatigue to take down a horse. A desire for ice cream covered in potato chips when I was drowning my sorrows for having such a big mouth.” My stomach chose that moment to roar, and he looked at me, aghast.
“You haven’t eaten?”
“No, I didn’t have a chance. I was at the hospital to see Ally and the baby and—”
“You have our own baby to concern yourself with now.”
“No kidding. What are you doing?”
He was already on the phone, talking to God knows who. A few minutes later, he hung up, satisfied. “Seth’s nanny will deliver dinner. She got the night off since I stayed with Laurie, so really, this is barely an inconvenience.”
I grabbed his phone to check the time. “Are you crazy? It’s so late. Surely there’s something we can eat here—”
“There isn’t. I only stocked aphrodisiacs and the like.” His tone was so smooth, I nearly managed not to goggle. “Those aren’t appropriate for you and a growing child.”
“Aphrodisiacs like what?”
“Oysters, for one. Asparagus. Red wine. French chocolates.”
“Chocolate sounds good.”
He was already on his feet and headed toward what I assumed was the kitchen. Not that I could follow him to find out, since my bladder took that opportunity to make its presence known.
“Where’s the bathroom?” I called out, quickly shedding my coat. Time was of the essence now.
“Top of the stairs, second right.”
I rose and hurried out of the living room and up the winding staircase that I’d seen off the foyer. At the top of the stairs, I opened the second door on the right, fumbled for the light, and sucked in a breath.
Holy crow, this bathroom rivaled the one in our suite in Vegas. No, it was better, because the bathroom there had been surrounded by tile, where this one carried the same theme of the living room, with wide wood beams and black marble everywhere.
I made swift use of the facilities, washed up, and then tried to do something with my hornet’s nest of hair before declaring it hopeless. I much preferred checking out the big, fancy claw-footed tub with the standalone shower, and heated towel rack, and oh God, even what seemed like a kind of warming body drier from a set of focused vents beside the towel rack. I had turned them on low and was letting the warm air caress the wet ends of my crazy curls when Oliver filled the doorway.
“That tub fits two,” he said nonchalantly, holding out both a half bar of chocolate and a fat strawberry, still damp from being rinsed off.
I leaned forward and let him push the strawberry between my lips, although my attempt at a sexy bite was a major fail and juice squirted onto my décolletage. He didn’t seem to mind. If anything, his already midnight eyes darkened as they dropped to my cleavage before returning to my face. His thumb traced the corner of my mouth and he licked at the leftover juice he collected on the tip before he broke off a piece of chocolate and offered that to me as well.
“Don’t want you getting hungry,” he murmured, his double meaning more than clear.
We might have already made an unplanned baby, but that didn’t mean he had any intention of ceasing practice anytime soon.
My sensitive nipples and the soaked cleft between my thighs both gave a thumbs-up to this plan.
“As for the tub, I don’t need to get any wetter than I am already.” When his lips twitched, I released an exasperated sigh. “I meant my hair from the snow. Don’t you think the sexual innuendoes have gotten us in enough of a pickle?”
“It was more than innuendoes that got us in that.” He stepped up behind me and broke off another piece of chocolate, nudging it between my lips. “Besides, there’s another way we can look at this.”
I was too busy chewing and swallowing—and licking his fingers, which started out being part of my pursuit of chocolate and soon morphed into something else—to answer.
He offered me the last piece and toyed with my hair as I scarfed it down without shame. “You can’t get pregnant again, now can you?”
Since I was still focused intently on the exquisite dark chocolate I’d just consumed, I didn’t fully get his meaning at first. “Seriously? Your sense of logic is…oddly arousing.”
“Thought so.” He twirled one of my curls around his finger. “No condoms.”
“Hmm. What’s for dinner?”
His smoky laughter coaxed my last few sleeping nerve endings to life. “Baked chicken with a lemon glaze, red-skinned mashed potatoes, baby carrots, a garden salad with balsamic, and strawberry shortcake. Seth’s nanny was the source of that strawberry I just fed you, by the way. Strawberries are one of the few appropriate items from our planned Valentine’s feast.” He brushed a kiss over my ear. “Luckily for us, she had prepared extras of what she’s bringing to Seth’s tomorrow. She often does some light cooking and cleaning here, along with her duties there.”
My stomach growled in anticipation. “It’s so late. She must’ve been all tucked in for the night.”
“I pay her handsomely. Don’t worry.” The doorbell chimed and he turned toward the door. “That must be her. Wher
e would you like to eat? The dining room? Or…” He gestured with his chin at the sunken tub.
“Dining room is fine.”
He left and I let out a long, whooshing breath. Was this really my life now? Home-cooked dinner delivery on the spur of the moment, served in bathrooms practically the size of my entire loft? The bathroom. I mean, who did that? Not my parents, that was for sure.
I was having a baby with this man. My child would grow up with this sort of everyday affluence, if Oliver truly wanted to be a full partner in this.
Something I needed spelled out. In detail.
I managed to wait until we’d finished the insanely delicious meal and moved on to the thick pieces of strawberry shortcake, drizzled with the berries’ sweet syrup and mounded with whipped cream. Decadent didn’t begin to cover it. As much as I wanted to dive in and lose myself in sheer caloric hedonism, I had to have clarification. We couldn’t just treat this like any other night and boink like bunnies since hey, no more need for latex! Booyah!
And jeez, people called me irresponsible.
“You’re not eating your dessert. Don’t you like it?”
Even without looking up, I knew he was watching me far too intently. “It’s wonderful. The shortcake part is so much better than actual biscuits. Not that I mind a good old-fashioned flaky biscuit, slathered in butter.”
Lookee there, I was babbling yet again.
I speared a strawberry half, chewed, and swallowed. My idea of fortification since liquid courage was out and not my drug of choice anyway. I usually leaned heavily on sweets. “I truly had no idea how you would react. I wasn’t going to bind you in any way.”
The tines of his fork scraped over the china. Oh yes, because we’d had to eat our late dinner on some family heirloom rather than Fiestaware. Or paper plates. They worked too.
“That so?”
“Yes. In case you feel hemmed in, I just wanted you to know that everything is voluntary. I’m not expecting anything. Not money, not…anything.”