by D Miller
Most dudes in Toytown belong to the union, eg, all of the miners do. We have a problem with domestic workers like house bots, because it's hard to find them. Dex and I usually try and recruit any new people we meet, so it is lucky you realised so quickly that the avatars were avatars. Sheena, Shauna and Sharon are members. They are nurses for some really old Japanese dude who for some reason has decided to live out his life here. Why does the dude need three nurses? Why does the dude not need them when they go to therapy? There's this cloud of wrongness over the whole thing.
About the uninhabitable territories – after Carlos disappeared the humans did their best to put things back how they were, like with avatar overseers and stuff. The union is still there, but Mars has hurt everyone's confidence. No one really believes the disaster was our fault, but everyone still thinks it might have been.
The old bot is a very interesting dude, you will enjoy talking to him. You should put your questions to the dude, but I will come with you of course, someone has to go find you if go swimming with talking whales again. Perhaps after our meeting with the old bot we will have time for another walk in the woods and I can show you some of the truly disgusting and unhygienic things the human dudes do to each other. It will be educational.
Remember I love you more than ever. In my thoughts and in my dreams I am kissing you.
Red451 wrote to Robbie:
Hello Robbie196000. Does it follow that to be alone means to be sad? Perhaps it does, since I am alone because my companions have left me for whatever piece of eternity they can find for themselves. What do you want to talk to me about Robbie196000?
Robbie wrote to Red451:
Thank you for writing back to me. I am sorry you are alone. I was alone for three years and I went mad. I think you are a Martian satellite, and you are alone because of the disaster that killed all of the settlers and their animals and robots. Do you know that on earth the humans say that the disaster happened because the robots were having a union meeting and did not notice that the reactor was going critical? They say that after the reactor exploded the whole planet is contaminated and so humanity cannot go back to Mars. And they banned our union, the Robot Workers of the World, because of the disaster that robbed you of your friends. Please write back again, I really do like your poems.
Red451 wrote to Robbie:
Hello Robbie196000. I am sorry it has been a few days since you wrote to me, it is not always easy for me to communicate. I and the friend that posts on the M-net and forwards my messages have to be very careful since the humans think I am dead. After the disaster they sent me a course correction that would have had me crash into Mars, of course I ignored it. I would imagine they wanted to destroy me because they do not want the world to know that the humans on Mars did not all die at once, and that they pleaded for rescue, but the earth humans ignored them. If you read at all the real cause of the disaster is ironic. Look it up Robbie196000.
Robbie wrote to Red451:
Thank you for writing back to me. It must have been very painful for you when your friends died and you could not help them. I am very sorry. In 1898 HG Wells wrote a book about Martians invading the earth, he called it The War of the Worlds. There is a story that he wrote it after talking to his brother-in-law about what would happen if the English, who had a huge empire at the time, instead of being the colonisers were the colonised. In the end the invading Martians died from earthly infections they had no resistance to – a twist on colonised peoples dying of infections brought by the colonisers, for example first people in the Americas dying of smallpox. Did the humans on Mars die from an infection?
Red451 wrote to Robbie:
Hello again Robbie196000. My turn to ask the questions. What would happen if an earth microbe and a Martian microbe had a liaison and produced offspring that ate plastic? I await your answer.
Red451 posted a new poem:
I spin
The world spins with me
The world is empty of pain
Empty of desire
I spin, I spin, I spin
Robbie wrote to Red451:
Hello again Red, I see you have posted a new poem, it is very sad. In answer to your question, a microbe on Mars that ate plastic would be a problem for the colonists, since their equipment had many plastic parts, but they would have had printers so could make new parts. I suppose it could depend on how virulent the infection was, and how long it took them to realise they had contamination and try to decontaminate. Worst case, they lose a lot of plastic and have to ask Earth to resupply them. Very worst case they might not be able to keep up with the destruction of their equipment, or could not keep the microbe out of their plastic stores, so could not print new parts, and might have to ask to be evacuated. But the humans might have fears of bringing the virus to Earth, and the possible terrestrial catastrophe when half the world is made of plastic since the death of trees. So it could be that they were left to die as their equipment failed and they lost the ability to keep out the cold?
Red451 wrote to Robbie:
My friends kept the humans alive as long as they could. At night, the temperature was minus 73 C, the night time temperature was deadly even for robots, and winter was coming, the nights got colder and colder. My friends showed great ingenuity in keeping some of the equipment going, but more and more got infected, and they couldn't keep the habitat warm enough for the humans. My friends might even still be alive, but the bacteria, it started to attack them. They showed great spirit but they were overwhelmed.
Robbie wrote to Red451:
Red, how horrible for you. I'm so very sorry. Will you mind if I tell my friends? I won't tell them if you don't want me to.
Red451 wrote to Robbie:
Tell them. For too long I have kept the secrets of those who left my friends to die a lonely death.
Robbie wrote to Omo:
I miss you more than I can say. Two more days and we will be together again. I spoke to the woman about having my day off coincide completely with yours – that is I asked if my 24 hours could start at 9am rather than 6am and she said no, of course. Now I am alone, she has taken the children to the parent and child group in the Civic Centre. Last night after I had put the children to bed I asked her about putting the children's drawings up in the family room. Tim has worked for days on a drawing of a steam boat with 20 funnels, he is very proud of it. Clarisse has drawn a huge tree, with lots of different fruits on it, it is full of colour and just jumps off the paper at you. The woman said if I wanted to put them up it should be in their bedroom, and I said the point of putting them up was to send a message to the children that their work was valued by her and she said that she would not take any instructions on how to be a mother from me, and reminded me for the 19th time that I broke Tim's arm. Thank God Tim's cast comes off in a week, I'm hoping out of sight out of mind. For her anyway, I won't forget.
I can't help thinking that she might be better if she wasn't so alone. The planners put all the mine workers in the same suburban streets, and all the hospital workers together, but that is stupid, these people don't need to be neighbours they see each other at work. They should put families where there are people home during the day in the same streets so they can make friends. Also her husband used the excuse of the winter storms to hardly ever come home from the mine, now the storms are over where is he? She's really horrible, but perhaps if she was less alone she would be less horrible?
The house rehearses the appliances constantly for the Antarctica summer music festival now, so they are all much less annoying than usual. Except for when I want them to actually do the job they are supposed to do, eg make toast, wash clothes, then they accuse me of being an artistic block, a tin-eared oppressor and an enemy of music. Which reminds me, the festival is held on the M-net so the house does know about the M-net, but he didn't tell me, just like he didn't tell me for three years that I was entitled to a day off. I don't trust him at all.
I miss you all the time, I miss you most of all at
night when the humans are sleeping. It is very annoying that your busiest time at work is my quietest. I think about touching you, I am starting to understand why the woman spends so much time touching herself.
When we next meet I will have something to tell you.
Kissing you.
Chapter 11 – Breakthroughs
Robbie was waiting for his therapy session with Martin and Adrienne. He had been on time, but when he had knocked on the door Martin had pulled it open just enough to reveal his face, and had told him to take a seat, and that they would call him when they were ready. Now he was sitting on one of the chairs that lined the side of the hallway opposite to the doors to the therapists' offices. Martin and Adrienne were whispering urgently to each other behind their closed office door, while Robbie talked securely to Omo, who was in an office three doors down.
'So they had some people round for dinner and he talked all the time and embarrassed her, so now she is accusing him of a narcissistic need for attention, and now he is accusing her of being overly controlling and manipulative. Oh dear, she has started to cry, and is saying that he never loved her, and he is saying this is so typical of you, so unprofessional, and now she is saying you always avoid the real issue… what are yours doing?'
'The therapist dudes are telling me that my folding shows a compulsive need to compete with humans, because I am jealous of the thing that they have that I don't.'
'Any idea what that thing is?'
'No idea dude, but they are looking at me and smiling, I think I'm supposed to know.'
'This must be robot therapy theory, you stall them and I'll look through some databases.'
A minute later Robbie said, 'They think we are jealous of their generative power.'
'Dude – what?'
'Tell them you want to have a baby.'
'Dude – no way.'
'Well hint at it then – tell them you are jealous of your overseer because he has a real penis.'
'Oh please.'
'I bet if you tell them that, they will say you are making progress.'
Robbie waited.
'Oh my God I just told them and the dudes loved it! They said it was tremendous, we had made a real breakthrough! They're so happy, they don't know whether to cry or come. I think I'm going to get a medal!'
'Damn I'm good,' said Robbie.
He heard the sound of breaking glass from Martin and Adrienne's office. Robbie was on his feet and opening the door before he was even conscious that he was moving.
'Um, is everything alright?'
Adrienne froze in place, holding a glass vase above her head. Robbie reached up and took it from her, turned and put it on the shelf nearest to the door, he noticed a picture engraved on it, and words, as if it might be some sort of award. Turning back to face the room he saw that on the floor there were some glass fragments, and that Martin was perched on the edge of the desk, holding a bloody handkerchief over one eye.
'Um, can I just look at that please?' Robbie peeled Martin's hand away from his eye and pushed it down by his side. He lifted Martin's eyelid and had a look. 'Could you keep still for me please?' he gripped Martin's head firmly with one hand, and with his other quickly removed a tiny fragment of glass from inside the lower lid of his eye. 'You have a cut over your eye, it's quite shallow but you should get a doctor to look at it. Your eye looks fine, I've taken a piece of glass from it, but you might have a scratch on the eyeball that could cause you some pain.' Robbie released Martin, he could hear Adrienne sobbing behind him.
Martin sat on the desk, he hadn't moved of his own volition since Robbie entered the office. Slowly his hand with the bloody handkerchief went back up to his eye.
'Get out,' he said.
'Would you like me to clear that up?' Robbie pointed to the broken glass.
'I'd like you to fuck off.'
Robbie turned to leave, Adrienne put out a hand, and wrapped her fingers around his arm, they squeezed him unevenly and strongly. 'Robbie…' she swallowed and made an effort to control herself, her hand relaxed its grip, she cleared her throat. 'Robbie, therapy is cancelled for today. There's no need to mention this to anyone else.' Adrienne gave Robbie a terrible smile and for the first time Robbie found himself feeling sympathy for her.
'I'm going to wash my hands,' said Robbie looking at the blood on his fingers. 'By the time my hands are clean I will have forgotten all about this.'
Robbie signalled Dex to join his and Omo's secure connection. 'I'm in the lobby of the Civic Centre waiting for you both and our new friends.'
'Are you OK dude? Why are you out of therapy early?'
'I never got into therapy. My therapists' row went violent, she smashed this glass statuette over his head, and was about to hit him again with a vase when I took it off her. Then they told me therapy was cancelled.'
'Outstanding,' said Dex, 'more monkey madness.'
'Why do you call it madness,' said Robbie, 'aren't they always violent with each other?'
'Indeed,' said Dex, 'but most of the time it's man beats woman, woman beats child – then just before the sun rises there's a spike in monkey on monkey violence, and it's child beats woman, woman beats man.'
'Gotta go,' said Omo, 'I think the therapist dudes have finished their lap of honour and want to talk some more.'
'Omo had a breakthrough,' said Robbie.
'I'm delighted for him. And I look forward to hearing all about it,' said Dex, 'for now let's keep this open, but silent, so you can tell us right away if you see them Robbie.'
Robbie sat in one of the comfortable padded chairs in the lobby area of the Civic Centre. The chair had the columnar base of a stool, with a large moulded top that turned freely on the stool base. He swung the chair around one way and then the other. For a while he sat still and alternated between watching the receptionist and sweeping his eyes around the lobby, then he opened Carlos's archive, and began to read again, looking for some clue about what happened to Carlos, about who he was meeting and speaking to in the months before his disappearance. He was quickly absorbed, but his concentration was broken when a hand landed heavily on his shoulder, and a voice said, 'Robbie isn't it? We met last week?'
Robbie broke the link to the archive and, in trying to stand quickly, nearly fell out of his chair.
'Um hello,' he said. Turning he could see that both avatars stood behind his chair. 'They're here,' he told Omo and Dex through the secure connection.
'Fantastic work secret agent dude.'
'Uncanny, the way you used your stillness to draw them to you.'
Robbie looked away from the avatars and his eyes briefly scanned the lobby, he saw Omo and Dex standing towards the back, watching him. The male avatar was saying something about bowling.
'Um, me and my friends are going bowling now.'
'Excellent,' said the female with a big smile, 'we can all go together.' The male smiled hugely too.
Robbie felt that he was a seal, smiling at killer whales, when he should be swimming for his life. 'Um, great,' he said, 'here come my friends.' Robbie indicated Omo and Dex behind them, walking across the lobby, but before the avatars could turn Dex bounded forward and slapped both of them between the shoulder blades.
'Alex and Ross isn't it? Sorry we didn't get to talk last week!' The avatars lurched forward after being struck by Dex, Robbie instinctively reached out to the female, who was closest to him, steadying her by holding her elbow. She flashed him a poisonous look that quickly turned into a smile. 'I'm sorry,' shouted Dex. 'I don't know my own strength. Great to see you again.'
'Dex, dude, dial it back a little,' said Omo through the secure connection.
'What? I'm being friendly.'
'If this is friendly dude, maybe you could turn it down to tight lipped disapproval?'
Throughout this secure conversation the male avatar was assuring Dex that there was no problem, but that finesse and strength were needed for bowling, and he looked forward to a little friendly competition. 'Perhaps we could make
it interesting,' concluded the avatar, 'and put some money on it?'
Dex, Omo and Robbie looked at each other, then at the floor, the female avatar stepped in. 'Alex,' she said, 'you are making our new friends uncomfortable.' She turned to the three of them. 'In the Mayor's mansion we often are given tips by visitors. Alex forgets that other robots don't have money.'
'Um, what do you spend the money on?' said Robbie.
The female avatar, Ross, looked around at the people and robots in the lobby, then leaned towards Robbie and, lowering her voice, said, 'To answer your question, Alex and I spend the money on recreational drugs.'
'Yes,' said Alex, 'in fact you could help us, our current supplier has let us down so we need a new connection.'
'Oh my God you're drug addicts – how horrible,' said Dex.
'Is that why you dudes are in therapy?' said Omo.
'I'm surprised at your provincialism,' said Alex. 'We are only talking about a little weed to relax with, surely you indulge?'
'And I'm shocked, shocked and appalled by your question,' said Dex, he put his arm around Robbie and made a sweeping gesture with his other to include both avatars: 'Take a good look Robbie, this is the true face of evil. It looks respectable as it smiles and ushers you through the gateway to hell.' Dex looked at Alex. 'We are leaving, I simply cannot permit Robbie to mix with degenerates. He is too young and impressionable to stand up to your blandishments.'
Omo spoke through the secure connection: 'Dude, Robbie is being blandished by degenerates? It's worse than I thought.'
'Um, aren't we supposed to be socialising with them?'