by Nance Sparks
“My pleasure and it really has been wonderful to have you stay with me. I didn’t realize how much I missed having someone to share things with.” Aren flicked the reins and headed for home.
She exhaled slowly, willing her heart to settle down. She was angry. Angry with the relentless rumors that plagued her for so many years. Angry at the kid who threw the bottle, angry for the loss of her vision and the need to travel like this in the first place. She wanted nothing more than a normal life. A normal life that could maybe include Carol, but tonight she realized how her way of life could affect Carol. She could have been injured, thrown from the wagon. Aren could never have forgiven herself if Carol had been hurt. Maybe a normal life wasn’t in the cards for her.
Chapter Eighteen
Later that evening, after chores were finished and their bellies were full of another Crock-Pot delight, they made their way back to the chairs still situated in front of the screened-in loft door. The low-hanging clouds had opened up and were releasing a soft, steady rain. The air felt damp and smelled so clean and refreshing after a hot, humid day. The breeze was a bit chilly given the dampness. Aren got up and grabbed a light blanket to drape over Carol’s lap.
“You are so thoughtful. You do so many things out of observation more than request. It’s sweet,” Carol said, nuzzling under the blanket.
Aren was glad they only had candles burning. “I saw you shivering and thought you’d enjoy a warm fuzzy.”
Carol reached over and took Aren’s hand in her own, resting both in her lap beneath the blanket.
“Can I ask you something?”
Aren sighed. She was tired and it had been a rough afternoon. She looked over to Carol knowing it had been a rough day for her too. Finally, she nodded.
“You mentioned that you were grateful to sober Phyllis. Would you tell me more about that? Something that was good in your life? Something that made you happy on this farm?”
Aren considered that. A happy story? Seriously? “Yes, of course.”
“I’d like to know that you’ve had some happiness in your life.” Carol held Aren’s eyes. Her expression was so sincere, so tender.
“I’ve had happiness in my life, right here, on this farm.” Aren squeezed Carol’s hand.
“Tell me about it. Please?” Carol leaned her head on Aren’s shoulder.
“When I was assigned here as a foster kid, I was terrified. I’d only ever lived in the city. Detroit of all places, downtown, serious big city. I knew nothing of life on a farm. They dropped me off here, with my Hefty bag of belongings, and introduced me to Ron and Phyllis Harris. They were so nice, so soft-spoken and kind. Phyllis loved to sew, loved to cook. She let me help and I treasured every minute of it. I’d measure fabric, cut it exactly as she asked, and then iron it exactly as asked once it was sewn. She made quilts, clothes, everything and anything needed for the family. She wouldn’t make me wear ruffles or super girly stuff either. She made clothes that I liked, clothes that Jen liked. She respected our differences. She was a great cook, too. She had a spice rack that was unbelievable and much of it was homegrown. Sage, basil, chives, oregano, you name it, Phyllis grew it in her herb garden and then dried it, and bottled it. Many of those herbs are the spices you’ve used to make your amazing Crock-Pot dinners.” Aren turned to Carol and smiled. “Phyllis would let me help cook meals, too. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, anything I’d ask to help with. Dinner was always meat, veggie, and potatoes or rice, each seasoned perfectly with spices that made your taste buds dance. I was in awe. I hadn’t experienced anything like that in my life before living on this farm.” Aren pulled her hand free from Carol’s. She walked into the kitchen and poured two cups of coffee. She added cream and sugar to Carol’s cup before returning to the chairs. Aren handed Carol her cup of coffee, then sat down beside her.
When Aren sat back down, Carol reached over and pulled her free hand back into her lap. Carol gave Aren’s hand a gentle squeeze. Aren squeezed back. She felt so completely accepted and at home at that moment.
“Keep talking,” Carol said, her eyes softly smiling.
Remembering the good things was painful too, but in a good way. “Ron was just as amazing, if not more so. I respected him, admired him. He was the first man in my life to ever earn that. He asked for honor, honesty, and a good day’s work. Not once did he ask us to do something he wasn’t willing to do himself. He was slow and methodical in his lessons. He showed us how to run a tractor and hook up the accessories. What to watch out for and where to push a little harder. How to work the fields, respect the soil, feed the soil, rotate crops, and appreciate the harvest. He taught me how to care for animals, tend the livestock, and gentle the horses. He never used a whip or a strong hand. We harvested timber that was overcrowded in order to create a healthy forest, milled that timber into useable boards and worked together side by side, something that was completely foreign to me, yet he was patient and gave me time to become accustomed to his ways. He taught me how to be one with the land. He was always kind and so knowledgeable. I sincerely admired him and enjoyed working at his side.”
“Was Jennifer included like you were?”
“Yes, yes, she was. She bonded more with Phyllis when we were younger, whereas I was perfectly happy working by Ron’s side, but we helped wherever we were needed. They treated us like part of a family, never like hired hands or foster kids.”
“Did you ever meet Daniel? What was he like?” Carol asked, her head still resting on Aren’s shoulder.
“No, we never met him. I’ve only ever seen pictures of him, heard stories, looked up the newspaper articles at the library. He was sentenced well before we were ever assigned here as foster kids. Phyllis traveled every week for his assigned visitors’ day. It was the only thing I ever heard them fight about. Ron had no interest in Daniel after the conviction, but Phyllis, she said he’d always be her son.”
“Were you happy that you were assigned here?” Carol asked, sounding sleepy.
Aren pulled her hand free and wrapped her arm around Carol’s shoulders. Carol snuggled as close as she could get given the separate chairs.
“Yes, I was happy to have been assigned here. Throughout high school, I was happy to call this land, this town, this farm, my home even with the stigma of living on the Harris farm and what Daniel did. During those years, Ron and Phyllis were a source of kindness, structure, and stability that had been missing all my life. The impact they had on my life was huge, and I miss those years to this day.”
Carol’s breathing evened out and deepened. Aren sat there in the chair holding her, grateful for the chance to explain some of her truths. She felt understood, at least for now. There was plenty more darkness lurking, but being able to remember the good had lightened the tunnel she’d been in for so long. She waited for hours before she helped Carol to bed, not wanting the moment to end. They hadn’t talked about Carol’s plans for the future, nor how long she planned on staying. But she could be grateful for this time that felt wonderfully normal, and she’d cherish the memory of it when Carol was long gone.
Chapter Nineteen
The sun was high in the cloudless sky, the breeze elusive. Heat and humidity returned with a vengeance. Carol was seated in the shade of the barn, thinking of everything and nothing all at the same time. It had been several days since the funeral and it had affected her more than she cared to admit. Saying good-bye to Aunt Suzie had been especially difficult. They’d become close since her mom’s passing. Seeing the two caskets in the front of the church brought back a flood of memories, and they kept threatening to drown her.
“Come on, it’s too hot to work. It’s been an intense few weeks. Let’s take a play day.” Aren’s voice pulled Carol from her thoughts.
Carol spun around in her seat. Aren stood behind her holding the handle of a large pull wagon in one hand and a small bucket in the other.
“Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise. You’ll like it, I promise. Come on, hop in.�
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“You want me to ride in the vegetable wagon like a veggie? I can follow along just fine with my crutches.”
“Humans are ninety percent water. We’re basically just walking cucumbers anyway. I know you can use your crutches, but you’ll be staring at the ground and not the scenery. Please, trust me, ride in the wagon. You can hobble all the way back if you want.”
Carol pushed herself up out of the chair and hopped to the side of the wagon. Aren had arranged pillows, transforming the wagon into a rolling lounge chair. She accepted Aren’s hand as she lowered herself onto her chariot. She leaned back against the tall wooden slats and situated her legs around a small picnic basket resting in front of her. Aren slid the wooden side panel back onto the old wagon before sliding Carol’s crutches in along the side. The smile on Aren’s face had Carol intrigued. She’d been quiet and thoughtful since the day they’d shared so much, and nothing more had been said about their pasts. And yet, something had shifted between them, too. There was a closeness now that made it so her breath caught whenever Aren was close. It was both scary and exciting, but she wouldn’t get ahead of herself.
Aren pulled the wagon onto a trail Carol had never noticed before. The trail led into a stand of dense forest where the trees towered over them. Large boulders jutted out on either side. It was breathtakingly beautiful. Carol looked up into the canopy and watched a squirrel leap from branch to branch. “They’re like little acrobatic stars, aren’t they?”
“See what you would have missed if you were staring at the ground looking for a place to land the crutches? You haven’t seen anything yet.” Aren twisted around, a big grin on her face.
The trail started to drop, twisting and turning into a valley. The side walls grew taller and were lined with trees growing out of jagged rock. How trees managed to flourish with a tiny bit of soil in the crack of a rock was beyond Carol. The temperature suddenly seemed to drop too, at least ten degrees as they made their way deeper into the valley. Carol closed her eyes and leaned her head back, treasuring the cooler air. Her eyes popped back open when she heard the sound of running water. A babbling brook, perhaps? Carol looked around for water but found none. Aren pulled the wagon around the large root base of an enormous old tree. The trail dropped down again and the sound of running water grew louder, closer. Around another tight bend and suddenly the trail ended at the edge of a large pool of water surrounded by tall trees. Sunlight streamed in through tiny openings in the canopy. A tall waterfall fed the pond on the far side. It was magical.
“Oh, Aren, this is incredible. Is this part of your farm?” Carol sat up, trying to take everything in.
“Indeed, it is. It’s my little hidden secret, and now there’s two of us in this world that know this paradise exists. We had a really wet year my second year here. The rains were so heavy that the river overflowed the banks. The deluge cut a groove and forked the river upstream about a mile away, and this is the result of that fork. The water never stopped flowing down here, like this little valley was a perfect home for it. The pool is deep out in the center, and as much as I try, I can’t swim to the bottom. I don’t know if it opened up a spring or if it was just that deep of a valley, but the waterfall keeps feeding the pool and the water flows on, out the other side over there. I’ve never been able to find where it ends, the terrain gets too dense, and there are too many ferns and wild raspberry bushes. All I know is that this water is clean and cool, and the pool is full of happy fish.”
Aren pulled the side off the wagon and leaned it against a tree. She lifted Carol’s crutches out and then held out her hand. Carol accepted the help up. Once she had the crutches situated, she made her way closer to the water’s edge. It was crystal clear. She could see tiny minnows swimming in the sandy-bottomed shallows.
Carol turned around in time to see Aren spreading out a blanket on the trail head. She must have been sitting on that blanket all the way here. Aren set a few pillows down on the blanket and then rested the picnic basket in the center.
“What I wouldn’t give to be done with this cast. The water looks so inviting, I’d love nothing more than to dive in.”
“How about a no splashing float? I dug through my stuff and found supplies that could work as a waterproof cast cover. I feel silly not having thought of it sooner. I know how much you’ve been craving a hot shower. If it works, you get both.”
“Seriously? Do you think it will work?” Carol felt giddy with the prospect of floating in the clear, cool water.
“I think it will work great. Here, let me help you down on the blanket and we’ll get it taped up.”
Carol held onto Aren’s hands while lowering herself onto the blanket. Aren was so thoughtful, so gentle, and this was such a private, romantic spot, it made Carol feel special, like Aren was sharing a part of her that no one else got to see. Aren lifted her casted leg and slid a thick plastic sock over it. She created a few pleats in the plastic and then pulled out a roll of tape about two inches wide. She taped up the pleats, sealing any gaps and then taped around the top of the plastic where it met Carol’s skin just below the knee. Aren’s touch was so gentle, and Carol couldn’t remember enjoying such an innocent touch so much. It almost tingled.
Aren popped up off the blanket, returning the tape to the bucket. She reached down in the bucket and pulled out a folded piece of plastic.
“I bought a couple of these as a test to keep ice out of the water troughs, but it was a completely failed experiment. The horses thought they were play toys and I was worried they’d choke on the plastic.”
Aren unfolded the plastic float ring, and with just a few breaths of air, she had it inflated.
“Are you okay getting your shorts and shirt wet?” Aren flopped down next to Carol and started pulling off her boots.
“What’s the alternative?” Carol could feel the heat rising in her cheeks. “Seriously, this is fine. My swimsuit is still buried beneath a tree.” The thought of standing before Aren in a bra, panties, or even naked, with a plastic and tape-covered cast wasn’t the romantic image she wanted for a first experience like that. If, of course, that was in the cards. Which it wasn’t.
“No one would see you except me.” Aren must have read her mind.
“I’m good going in just like this. Thanks, though.” Carol fanned her face, pretending to be hot and not completely embarrassed.
Carol watched Aren pull off her socks. She stood and unbuckled her belt, then unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans. The jeans fell into a puddle on the blanket and then Aren tossed her hat down and removed her sunglasses. There she stood in fitted boxer shorts and a white tank top. It was probably the sexiest sight Carol had ever seen, in spite of the ghostly white legs.
“I have never seen such tan arms and such pale white legs in my life.” Carol tried to suppress her pounding heartbeat and tried for teasing instead. “Is this the first time they’ve ever seen the sun?”
“Keep it up, Ms. Matthews. Shorts and livestock don’t much go hand in hand.” Aren picked up the float ring before squatting down and scooping Carol up in her arms.
Aren waded out into the pool of water cradling Carol in her arms. Carol felt like she was being whisked away by her knight in shining armor on a hot summer day. She kept her arms wrapped around Aren’s neck as the cool water enveloped her and crept up her back. It felt amazing, refreshing, and she hoped it would help cool the desire she felt to pull Aren in and kiss her.
Aren stopped walking as if she’d read Carol’s mind. Carol felt Aren’s arm that was supporting her back slide down lower, closer to her butt, and then Aren’s hand was wrapping around Carol’s thigh. Carol’s heart pounded; her breath hitched. And then Aren pulled the arm away that was supporting Carol’s legs. She slid the floating ring over the plastic wrapped cast up to Carol’s knee and then she took two more steps until they were both neck-deep in the crystal-clear water. The cool water did nothing to calm her beating heart or soothe her disappointment. These new feelings would have to be nipped in
the bud. Her life was far too messy to get involved with anyone, even someone as hot and sweet as Aren. Wasn’t it?
Chapter Twenty
“I’m going to let you go for just a minute. Are you okay to float here or would you like me to take you closer to shore?” Aren asked.
“I can keep myself from drowning if that’s what you’re asking. Where are you off to?” Carol’s expression was suspicious.
“It’s a surprise. Wait here. I’ll be right back.” Aren pulled her arms away.
Aren watched Carol lean back and use her arms to gently float in the water, and the inflated tube supported the plastered leg perfectly. She looked more relaxed than Aren had ever seen her. Aren swam underwater toward her favorite spot, back behind the waterfall. When she came up for air, she was hidden behind the cascading falls. She checked the rock ledge for any unwelcome visitors. Over the years, she’d encountered a few snakes, a racoon eating a fish, and once, a very aggressive badger, though today the rock ledge was free for the taking. She stood there for a moment, behind the cascading water, watching Carol float out beyond her reach. She was the first person allowed to peek over the fortress walls that surrounded her heart. Except Jennifer, of course. Though, back then, Jen just leapt over the top and was inside before Aren had known what happened. She was more guarded now, more cautious, though she had to admit that she liked the way it felt to care about someone and to be cared for. She dropped under water again and made her way back to Carol.
She resurfaced next to Carol, scooping her up into her arms. “Close your eyes.”
“Now what are you going to do?” Carol asked, her arms tightening around Aren’s neck.
“You’ll see. Close your eyes, come on, trust me. I am a doctor.” Aren was excited to share her special spot with Carol. She hoped that Carol enjoyed it as much as she did.