Holding Onto Hope

by L. Grubb

  “We stay on lockdown, no one fucking leaves until we have a solid conclusion. Hope needs to be safe. She’s my Old Lady so she has full protection of the club, understood?” I look around at the shocked looks on everyone’s faces. Yeah, I knew they’d be fucking shocked. I’ve not once had an Old Lady, nor did I show them that I even wanted one. Deep down, I was desperate to have what Amo and Trip have and now I may have just found it. “Don’t look so shocked. I’m not that fucking ugly. You may leave.” I don’t bother with the gavel and just wave my hand in the air, dismissing them.

  Ranger stays behind, still planted firmly in his seat and his mouth open in shock. “You serious, dude?”

  “About Hope? Abso-fucking-lutely, brother.” A smirk lifts the corner of my mouth as I remember the feel of her skin against mine, how her face lights up in moments of ecstasy and how her lazy smile lights up her face after I’ve ravished her body. Last night was the best night of my life, even if my aching body is feeling it this morning.

  “Well that was fast. You hardly know the girl.” Ranger’s head tilts to the side as he studies me. “Damn, you’re falling hard, man.”

  “Huh?” I frown at him, my smirk gone. “I like her a lot, I care about her. I wouldn’t say love is on the cards just yet, mate. Even I can’t work it that quick,” I say, chuckling to shake off his words. I’m not falling for Hope Jayne Granger, am I? No fucking way. I don’t believe in love at first sight. I never have done and still don’t now. It may develop into that, but you never know. We sit here, shooting the breeze for a good half hour before we decide it’s time to move our arses.

  We both stand up at the same time, heading towards the doors when a loud explosion throws us back, landing with the thud on the floor and my head smacks against the table. Shit. Motherfucker. “What the fuck was that?”

  I rub the spot at the back of my head where a lump is rapidly forming, and frown. “Ranger?” I call out. Smoke is rapidly filling the room, and panic starts to set in. “Mate, where are you?”

  “I’m under the fucking table. Fuck. That hurt.” He crawls out from under the table, breathing heavily. “What was that?”

  “How the fuck do I know? I’m still sat on my arse with a giant lump on the back of my fucking head.” I take a deep breath, calming my nerves. “We need to check it out. I need to make sure Hope’s okay.”

  “And the brothers,” Ranger adds. “Though most of them are on runs today, they should have left as soon as Church was over, so there’s only a few mingling about.”

  We rise to our feet at the same time, once again heading to the doors. Hope is in the forefront of my mind, her wellbeing, her safety. My heart aches when I think something terrible has happened to her. I’m fucking terrified in fact.

  Doors open, we peer out. Smoke has filled the main room but I can make out figures by the doors leading to the front of the clubhouse. They’re perfectly still but I can just about make out the words.

  “Find the girl. Kill anyone who gets in your way. She’s ours and Mack will fucking pay.” Lynx. It’s fucking Lynx. I knew he was fucked up over the Crusaders taking what they believed was their property, I was expecting a massive blow out between us when I can finally shove a bullet into his damn skull, but this is much sooner than we expected.

  “Shit. Mack? What do we do.” Ranger’s voice is strained, whether it’s from anger or fear I don’t know.

  “You packing?” I ask him, glancing over at him.

  “Course I fucking am.” Anger. He’s pissed and I can’t say I blame him, I’m feeling the same.

  “Shoot to kill. Saving Hope is our main priority.” I nod to him and we creep out the door. I metaphorically thank the smoke for keeping us quite hidden. And we crouch behind the sofa, pulling our guns from the back of our jeans.

  I stand and aim my gun at Lynx. The smoke is clearing and I can finally see the man I thought I put six-feet under; the man who survived my bullet. He’s not going to be so fucking lucky this time.

  “Lynx. How nice of you drop by,” I sneer, my lip curling up at him. I’ve never hated someone as much as I hate this guy. He’s dirt, filth, dangerous and a complete bastard. “I was wondering how long it would take you to come.”

  “Mack,” Lynx hisses, his eyes finding mine. He steps forward, coming closer to me and Ranger. “Where’s Hope? Let’s make this quick, yes? Give me the girl and I’ll spare you your life.”

  My laughter booms around the room; is he fucking serious? “You think I’m going to give her up to you that easily? Fuck. You’re more delusional than I thought.” My laughter dies down and in the silence of the room, I can hear his angry breathing and I can see his arm shaking; the one holding his gun. “You’ll have to get through me first and we both know that’s not gonna happen.”

  “Now, now, Mack… no need to be testy. Be a good boy now, yeah? She’s ours and you know the club rules more than most, you know property is property. If one of us came and stole Amo from your club, you’d be hunting us down ‘til your dying breath. Wouldn’t you?” Silence follows and my blood boils at knowing he knows more about us than I thought he did. “ANSWER ME!” his voice booms, the noise penetrating my ear drums.

  “I understand the rules, Lynx. But the thing this, Hope never even belonged to you. She’s always been ours. She’s been protected by this club for years.” I smirk, knowing he wouldn’t have known this; it was kept under wraps by Ranger and myself. The brothers or prospects that followed her, keeping her safe, didn’t know who she was.

  “I call bullshit. There’s no reason that she would be under your protection. Granger was no-mad.” Lynx’s anger grows, I know for a fact he hates being wrong, he hates being double-crossed and he hates when shit doesn’t go his way. “And he’s dead.”

  “He was a brother here before he was no-mad, that’s no secret.” I really can’t be fucked with having a conversation about this anymore. He’s never going to acknowledge the fact he’s wrong. He’ll never relinquish something once he has his mind set on it. I know claiming Hope would be no exception.

  “She owes his fucking debt! She will pay!” His voice booms around the room, bouncing against the walls. “Where the fuck is the girl, Mack. We know she’s here, your mum has a motor mouth and so does your friend Pike.”

  “My mother knows nothing of life here, nor does she know about Hope. And Pike? He’s been dealt with.” I smirk at him but inside I’m reeling. How does my mother know?

  He chuckles, shaking his head from side to side and making his long, greasy black hair to shift about in his shoulders. “Did you not know? Your mum has been seeing… what’s his name? Smoke? For the last seven months or so… can’t say he’s been too quiet about shit either. He’s pissed.”

  I ignore him as my gut churns, instead saying, “Your time is up, Lynx. I may have fucking missed last time but this time I won’t miss. Your very existence doesn’t belong on this planet, polluting it with your disgusting habits. Children, young girls, will be much fucking safer without you around. Your club will run into the ground once your gone and if it doesn’t, then we’ll make sure it does.” I line my gun up, aiming straight between the eyes.

  He goes to lift his arm but I don’t give him the chance; I pull the trigger and Lynx’s body slams to the floor. The two guys that were on either side of him look down on him, surprise on their faces. I smirk. This time there’s no fucking mistaking the fact he’s dead; half his head is being worn by the two punks that were flanking him.

  The two guys hold their hands up in surrender, frightened looks on their faces. Lynx’s club members are pussies, we knew that and their expressions just confirm it. Ranger ignores their surrendering hands and shoots them both in the chest in quick succession.

  We round the sofa and Ranger nods at me, knowing how desperate I am to check on Hope. I know where she is, she’s locked safely in the library where she usually is.

  I take off running in that direction, my heart pounding with trepidation. She has to be okay, she has
to be.

  I reach the door of the library, noticing it closed but unlocked and my heart skips a beat and I swallow the sudden lump in my throat. “Hope?” I call to her as I open the door.

  My heart stops, my body freezes, as I see Hope held against the wall with a knife to her throat. It’s not just any dude either, it’s Smoke. He doesn’t seem to have noticed me, but Hope has and I hold a finger to my mouth to tell her to be quiet. Her eyes squeeze shut and the pure terror that’s written across her face has a growl building in my chest and my pulse dances around in a crazy rhythm.

  I tiptoe quietly behind him; I can’t aim a gun at him and risk missing and hitting Hope, I’d never forgive myself. Instead, I grab the scruff of his jacket and yank hard, pulling him away and dropping him to the floor. His knife clatters to the floor and I jump on him, landing punch after punch into his evil face. Hope’s scared face floats through my head as my fist makes contact again and again until the douchebag is unrecognisable.

  “Mack!” Hope’s frightened scream behind me brings me around from the anger haze and I stare at the unconscious dick beneath me before spitting on him. He’s been double-crossing me for months and I didn’t suspect a fucking thing. He’s lucky Hope needs me. He could be so much worse off right now. I roll off him, my breathing hard and heavy. I close my eyes and try to control my erratic heartbeat, my racing pulse and the anger that’s flowing through my veins.

  The room is silent except for my breathing and Hope’s, so I don’t notice her grabbing the knife or creeping closer. I only open my eyes when a thud alerts me to someone close and I see Hope on her knees next to Smoke, who I once used to trust with my life, knife held above his chest with both hands and a murderous look in her face. “I’m fed up with men treating me like shit, Smoke, and your one of the worst. Fuck. You.” And before I can even open my mouth, or move to stop her, the knife comes down, plunging straight into his chest, into his heart.

  I’m completely shell shocked at her actions. Little innocent Hope isn’t so innocent after all it seems. I don’t know whether to stay shocked or be fucking proud that she stood up for herself against the very people who have brought more misery into her life. She sits back and hugs her knees, silent tears streaming down her pale face and her hair frizzing from her ponytail.

  Her eyes lock with mine and my breath stalls in my throat. Her eyes are pleading with me but for what, I don’t know but I get up and collapse beside her, pulling her straight into my lap and wrapping my arms around her. “Shh… it’s okay, babe. It’s over now. You’re safe.” I kiss the side of head and hold her tight, not wanting to ever let go of her again. “No one can hurt you now.”

  “Prez?” Rangers voice floats into the room, a slightly panicked lilt to it. “Where the fucking hell are you?”

  “In here!” I shout. “The library.” Ranger enters, taking in the scene in front of me.

  “Jesus H. Christ, Mack. What the heck happened in here?” He eyes a very dead Smoke whose blood is pooling around him, then Hope, then his eyes land on mine. “Care to fill me in?”

  “Later. Is everyone okay?” My anger is still simmering under the surface. This could have been a fuck lot worse and I’m thankful I got here in time. I can’t imagine what would have happened if I didn’t manage to get away from Lynx so quick. Would Hope be the one bleeding out all over the floor? The thought is too much to comprehend and I hold her tighter whilst swallowing the lump lodged deep in my throat; losing Hope when I’ve only just found her… I could’ve never lived with myself.

  “Yeah, everyone who was here is fine. Thankfully, Lynx and whoever he brought with him never got to the back of the clubhouse before we came out. The women are shaky but other than that, no injuries.” I release a harsh breath and close my eyes briefly, thanking the higher power that this time there was no deaths on our side; Pike not included. “Church?

  “Yeah, give me half hour.” Ranger nods and leaves, shutting the door behind him.

  “Hope? Are you alright? Please tell me that you’re okay.” I kiss the side of her head again, squeezing her tighter to me.

  “I’m fine, Mack. Thanks for saving me… again. You seem to be making a habit of that.” She giggles and the sound shocks me. After everything she’s been through, she can still chuckle? This woman baffles me. “Honestly, the shock of it all is wearing off and considering what just happened, I’m fine. I don’t feel any different. Except the fear of the Devil’s whatsits has evaporated. It’s over.” She lifts her head and her eyes land on mine. “But now I fear of what happens now all is said and done. Are ‘we’ real? Or am I going home back to my normal, shit life and never see you again?”

  “What? No. No, you’re not going back to a shit life, I told you before and I’ll tell you again, I want to cherish every inch of you. I don’t lie, babe. I want to be with you more than I want to take my next breath. I’ve only just found you, do you think I’d really let you go so easily?” I don’t give her a chance to reply as my lips land on her, shockwaves race down my body and my blood heats with lust. Just a kiss from Hope has me on my knees. “I want you to be my Old Lady forever if you’ll have me.”

  “I’d like that.” A shy smile flits across her face and she moves back making my arms loosen around her. “I’ll be your old lady, Mack, on one condition.”

  “And what condition would that be?” I smirk, I do like a woman who knows what she wants.

  “That we don’t spend every darn night here partying like rockstars. I want you to myself… a lot.” Hope’s eyes are dancing with humour and lust and I find myself nodding in agreement. “Good.”

  “I have a house. I want you to move in,” I say, blurting my thoughts out. Shit, did I just say that?

  “Um… okay? Talk about jumping in at the deep end. We only just agreed to be exclusive after all.” She laughs, her quirky mouth lifting into the biggest grin I’ve seen her wear thus far. And that smile makes her look radiant, it makes me want to ravish her in all kinds of filthy ways.

  “I’m not one to hold back, Hope. Now let get off this floor, away from the dead guy and I’ll take you to the bar where you can get shit faced drunk with Amo while I’m hosting church,” I say to her, standing and pulling her up with me.

  “I think that’s a wonderful idea. But first, I want a toe-curling kiss.” She puckers her lips playfully as I pull her flush against me, my sudden erection pushing into her belly.

  “Will be my pleasure, babe.” My lips crash to hers, our tongues battle together and heat floods my body. Fuck, I’ll never get enough of her. Ever.

  I’m looking forward to seeing where this goes, where we end up. It’s about living in the here and now, not thinking too much into the future. I want to enjoy lavishing kisses and orgasms of my Old Lady with no time limit in place; no ending in sight. She’s made me a happy fucker and I’ll thank her every day for bringing me into the light a little, leaving part of my darkness behind. Our story is far from over, I don’t think it ever will.

  The End

  Watch out for Ranger’s story, Amo’s story and more from Mack and Hope!

  I hope you’ve enjoyed this book as much as I have writing it.

  About the Author

  Lucii is a your typical British girl, hates the sun and hibernates when summer arrives! She lives at home with her 2 daughters, where they spend the day watching Frozen and peppa pig and playing play-doh.

  She started off as a regular person, job, home life, health issues and a love of reading. After reading the Fifty shade phenomenon, she went onto social media to seek other authors writing the same or similar genres. She entered a world she didn’t know existed and went to open a successful blog.

  Inspiring dreams took a back burner, while she learned the book community and met a bunch of amazing authors and readers alike.

  A year later she decided to start writing, hoping against hope that her friends and fellow readers will like what she brings to the table.

  />   L. Grubb, Holding Onto Hope