by Cora Reilly
I tensed, turning her around to me, feeling so fucking angry. For an instant, Serafina shrank back from the force of my fury, but then she met my gaze. She lay unmoving on her side, eyes full of anguish.
“You aren’t a whore. Is your fucking virginity all that matters to your family?”
“It’s not just that I’m not a virgin anymore,” she whispered. “It’s to whom I lost it to. They won’t understand. They won’t forgive. They will hate me for what I’ve done.”
“Shouldn’t they be relieved that you didn’t suffer through pain and humiliation? You succumbed to pleasure. So what? All of them have sinned worse than that, even your brother, particularly your fiancé. What right do they have to judge you?”
She blinked slowly. Then she surprised me by leaning forward and kissing me. A soft kiss. A soft nothing that felt like fucking everything. My brows drew together, trying to gauge her mood.
“I’m lost, Remo.”
I cradled her head and kissed her again before I rasped, “My note said that I ripped your innocence from you, that you fought me like a spitfire and that I enjoyed every second of breaking you.”
She held her breath, searching my eyes. “You made it sound like you raped me.” She swallowed. “Why did you lie? Was it because it would hurt my family worse?”
I smiled darkly. “I fear your family would have been more crushed if they knew you gave yourself to me freely.”
“They’d hate me.”
“Now you can decide what you tell them when I return you to them.”
“You will?” she asked quietly.
I drew back and sat up then turned my back to her. “You were never meant to be a captive forever.”
Her fingertips traced my tattoo. “Now that you got what you wanted from me, you’ll ask for Scuderi.” There was a strange note to her voice, but I didn’t turn around to see her face because then she would have seen mine as well.
“Do you think they’ll still want me now that I’m ruined?”
Serafina was many things, but ruined wasn’t one of them, and anyone who declared her as such was a fucking fool. “Your family loves you. They will do anything to save you, even now. Especially now.”
I rose to my feet and left without another look at her.
It was nearing midnight when my phone rang. I turned away from the screen where Savio and Adamo were playing a racing game. Nino and Kiara had already retired to their room to fuck. Without looking at the screen, I knew who it was. I picked up.
“Dante?”
My brothers slanted me curious looks. “I got your message,” Dante gritted out. I could practically feel his fury. It wasn’t as exhilarating as I’d expected.
“I know you don’t follow the Famiglia’s bloody sheets tradition, but I thought it was a nice touch.”
Adamo grimaced and his car crashed into the wall. Savio had stopped playing altogether.
There was silence on the other end. “There are rules in our world. We don’t attack children and women.”
“Funny that you say that. When your soldiers attacked my territory, they fired at my thirteen-year-old brother. You broke those fucking rules first, so stop the bullshit.”
Adamo’s eyes widened, and he glanced down at his tattoo.
“You know as well as I do that I didn’t give the order to kill your brother, and he’s alive and well.”
“If he weren’t, we wouldn’t be having this conversation, Dante. I would have killed every fucking person you care about, and we both know there are so many to choose from.”
“You have people you don’t want to lose either, Remo. Don’t forget that.”
Savio and Adamo watched me, and it took considerable effort to keep my fury at bay. “I thought the sheets might have made you see reason, but I see that you want Serafina to suffer a bit more.”
I hung up. After a couple of heartbeats, my phone rang again, but I ignored it.
“I take it Dante isn’t willing to cooperate yet,” Savio said with a grin.
Adamo shook his head, pushed to his feet, and stormed upstairs.
Savio rolled his eyes. “For a few days he’s been almost tolerable. I suppose that’s over now.”
I stood, switched the phone to silent mode, and shoved it into my pocket. “I’ll have a word with him.”
“Good luck,” Savio muttered.
I didn’t bother knocking before I stepped into Adamo’s room. My eyes scanned the floor, which was littered with dirty clothes and pizza boxes. I walked toward the window and flung it open to get rid of the horrid stench.
“Why don’t you clean your room?”
Adamo hunched over in front of the computer at his desk. “It’s my room and I don’t mind. I didn’t invite you to come in.”
I walked up to him and tapped against his tattoo. “You’d do well to show me respect.”
“As my older brother or my Capo?” Adamo muttered, jutting his chin out.
“Both.”
“For what you did to Serafina, you don’t deserve my respect.”
“What did I do?”
He frowned. “You forced her?”
I brought our faces closer. “Did I?”
“You didn’t?”
“Are we going to keep exchanging questions? Because it’s getting annoying.”
“But you slept with her,” Adamo said in confusion.
“I did,” I said. “But she wanted it.”
“Why?”
I laughed. “Ask her.”
“Do you think she’s in love with you?”
My muscles tautened. “Of course not. ” Love was a delirious game for fools, and Serafina was many things but not a fool.
“I like her.” Adamo regarded me almost hopefully. I wondered when our world would rid him of the last shreds of his innocence.
“Adamo,” I said sharply. “I kidnapped her so she could serve the purpose of getting revenge on the Outfit. She won’t stay so don’t get attached.” He shrugged. Sighing, I touched his head then left.
Oh, Serafina.
I headed toward my wing, but instead of continuing to my room, I stopped in front of Serafina’s door. I knew Dante would agree to give me Scuderi any day now. I unlocked the door and entered. Serafina was curled up on her side, reading a book. She put it down when I closed the door and walked toward her.
She frowned. “Just because I slept with you once—”
“Twice,” I corrected.
“Just because I’ve slept with you twice doesn’t mean I’ll sleep with you whenever you feel like it.”
I sank down beside her. “Is that so?” I trailed my fingertips over her exposed arm. Goose bumps rose on her skin.
“I’m too sore. I think last time was too much,” she admitted, her cheeks turning pink.
My fingers halted on her collarbone. “Do you need to see a doctor?”
“It’s not that bad.” She narrowed her eyes a tad. “Are you concerned for me?”
Ignoring her question, I said, “I didn’t come for sex anyway.”
“What did you come for, then?”
If only I knew. I removed my gun and knife holster and dropped it to the floor beside the bed before I stretched out next to her and propped my head up on my hand.
“Don’t tell me you’ve come to cuddle,” she said.
My mouth twitched. “I’ve never cuddled with a woman.”
“You did today.”
I considered that. I’d held her in bed after sex, had watched her sleep in my arms. “I was only there to make sure you didn’t drown in self-pity.”
“Sure,” she muttered. “You said you never cuddled with a woman. Do you make a habit of cuddling with men, then?”
I chuckled and slid my hand into her hair. She leaned into the touch ever so slightly. I wasn’t sure she noticed. “I don’t anymore.” At the questioning lift of her eyebrow, I continued. “I used to cuddle with Adamo and Savio when they were really small.”
Her nose wrinkled. “Sorry. I can
’t see it. Considering how exhausting small kids can be, I’m surprised you didn’t end up killing them.”
My fingers twitched but I restrained my anger. “They are my brothers, my flesh and blood. I’d die before I ever hurt them.” I fell silent.
Serafina was quiet too. “I don’t understand you, Remo Falcone.”
“You aren’t supposed to.”
“I’m perceptive. Before you know it, you’ll reveal more to me than you want.”
I feared she was right. A chess piece. A means to an end. That was all Serafina could ever be. Nothing more.
My smile turned cruel. “Serafina, I know losing your virginity to me makes you think we share a special bond. But two fucks don’t make you anything special to me. I’ve fucked so many women. One pussy is like any other. I took something from you, and now you want to justify it with fucking emotional bullshit.”
She stiffened but then gave me a cunning smile of her own. Her fingers curled over my neck, and she pressed her forehead against mine like I had done before. “You took something from me, true, but you’re not the only one doing the taking. Maybe you don’t see it yet, but with every bit you take from me, you’re giving me a bit of yourself in return, Remo, and you will never get it back.”
I harshly claimed her mouth and rolled on top of her, pressing her into the mattress with my weight. “Don’t,” I snarled into her ear. “Don’t think you know me, Angel. You know nothing. You think you’ve seen my darkness, but the things you haven’t seen are so pitch black no fucking light on this earth can penetrate them.”
“Who’s not brave now?” she whispered.
I shook with anger. I wanted to fuck my rage out of my system. Wanted to hurt. Wanted to break something. I moved down her body and shoved her nightgown up then ripped her thong down her legs.
“I told you I’m sore,” she said softly.
Fuck, why did she have to sound so vulnerable in that moment? What the fuck was she doing to me? I pushed her legs apart. She didn’t stop me despite the tension in her limbs. Taking a deep breath, I lowered myself to my stomach, resting between her thighs.
Her body softened immediately when she realized I wasn’t going to hurt her. I jerked her toward my mouth, and she winced. I softened my lips against her folds, and soon she was writhing and moaning, her legs falling open, trusting, and fuck, it was better than any rage fucking had ever been. I took my time, enjoying the way she allowed herself to surrender to pleasure. My fingertips traced the soft flesh of her inner thigh, the relaxed muscles there. No sign of tension or fear.
She came with a beautiful cry, her body arching up, giving me a prime view of her gorgeous nipples. I trailed kisses up her body until I reached her lips. “You’re all about giving and taking. I gave you my mouth. How about you giving me yours now?”
“You can have my hand, no more,” she said firmly.
“I want to come down your throat, not in your hand.”
She held my gaze. “You can have my hand or nothing.”
“The last time a woman gave me a hand job, I was fourteen. After that I came in a mouth, pussy, or ass.”
“I’m not like them, Remo.”
No, she wasn’t. Serafina was everything. Cunning and strong. Loyal and fierce. She could have been Capo if women were allowed that place in our world.
I rolled on to my back and crossed my arms behind my head. Serafina sat up. She tried to mask her inexperience, but her nerves shone through when she fumbled with my belt. I didn’t help her. My cock was already painfully hard when she pulled it out of my briefs. Her touch was too soft as she stroked me, but I enjoyed watching her. Soon she found the right pressure and tempo, and I reached down between her legs and drew small figure eights along her clit and folds. When Serafina began shaking with the force of her orgasm, and her hand tightened around my dick, my own release overwhelmed me, and I came like a fucking teenager all over my stomach.
I used her thong to clean my stomach despite her frown. Then I pulled her down against me. She was stiff but eventually she put her head down on my shoulder.
“That wasn’t so bad,” I drawled. “But if you want to bring me to my knees, you’ll have to use your mouth.”
She huffed. “I’ll figure out another way to bring you to your knees, Remo.”
If anyone could, then it would be her.
CHAPTER 18
SERAFINA
I woke with someone pressed up against my back, a warm breath fanning over my shoulder.
I didn’t pull away, only stared at my hand, which rested atop his on the bed. The skin on my ring finger was lighter from wearing my engagement ring for five years, and now it lay on my nightstand abandoned. And how could I ever wear it again? How could I ever face my fiancé again after everything I had done? Everything I still wanted to do.
Deep down I knew I didn’t want to marry Danilo anymore, but it was my duty, even now. I ran my fingertips over Remo’s hand, and he woke with a current of tension radiating through his body. I assumed he wasn’t a man used to sharing a bed with someone.
He exhaled and relaxed but didn’t say anything. I turned his hand over until his palm was up then traced the burn scars there, wondering how they’d come to be. My touch followed the scars up to his wrists, where crisscross scars fought for dominance with his burn marks. Remo’s breathing changed, became cautious, dangerous.
“Will you ever tell me how you got those?”
He bit the nape of my neck. “Why should I?”
Yes, why should he spill his guts to me? I turned around in his hold. His expression was forbidding, but his eyes held a hint of something even darker. “You’re right,” I whispered, holding his gaze. “I’m only your captive. The queen in your game of chess. Something meaningless, easy to forget the moment you give me back.” Even as I spoke the words, I couldn’t imagine Remo really letting me go, not with the way he looked at me, and I wasn’t sure if the realization terrified or relieved me. Because how could I return to the Outfit?
“Oh, Angel, forgetting you will be impossible.”
And I smiled. God help me, I smiled.
Remo shook his head slowly. “This is madness.”
“It is.” It was and worse ... betrayal. Dad. Mom. Sofia. Sam. Guilt gripped me in its choking hold. I swallowed. “My family ...” I didn’t say more.
Remo’s face hardened and he untangled himself from me and stood. My eyes took him in, the harshness of his expression, those cruel eyes, the scars and muscles.
Remo was the enemy. He was trying to destroy the people I loved by using me as his weapon. I couldn’t forget that. He put on his clothes and gun holster. Then he nodded grimly. “That’s the look you’re supposed to give me, Angel. Hold on to your hatred if you can.”
“Can you?”
He didn’t say anything, only smiled darkly. He turned around and left. The fallen angel tattooed to his back seemed to mock me because every day I felt a bit more like an angel falling.
Kiara picked me up around lunchtime. I could tell from the way she was looking at me that she knew I’d slept with Remo. Nino had probably told her, and Remo had told him and probably everyone else. I hadn’t dared to ask him if the sheets had arrived yet. The mere idea that my family and fiancé saw them drove bile up my throat.
We settled on the sofa. She’d ordered vegetarian Sushi, which was set up on the table in front of us. I didn’t see Nino anywhere, but I knew he was close and would storm in at the slightest sound of distress from Kiara.
We ate in silence for a while, but eventually Kiara couldn’t contain her concern anymore. She touched my shoulder, her eyes flitting to the bite marks on my throat. “Are you okay?”
I set down the sticks and met her gaze. “I’m a captive in these walls, and I betrayed my family. I let Remo dishonor me. I’m ruined. So what do you think?”
She pursed her lips. “You’re only ruined if you allow others to make you feel that way.”
“You don’t understand.” I snapped my lip
s shut, shame washing over me because everyone knew the stories about her. “I’m sorry.”
Kiara shook her head, a flicker of pain in her eyes but she straightened her shoulders with a smile. “I felt ruined for years ... until I didn’t anymore, and then I was free.”
“If my family and fiancé find out Remo didn’t force me, they won’t forgive me.”
“Do you want to return to your fiancé?”
“Do you think I want to stay with Remo?” I muttered. “He kidnapped me. He keeps me locked in a room. He is my enemy. Sex won’t change that.”
Kiara regarded me closely. “Maybe there’s a chance for peace between the Outfit and the Camorra. You could be that chance. Something good can be born from an act of brutality.”
“But there won’t be. My dad, my uncle, my fiancé, my brother won’t ever agree to any kind of peace. They are proud men, Kiara. You know how Made Men are. Remo took me from them, stole my ... stole my innocence.”
“It’s either stolen or given.”
I looked away. “They won’t see it that way. He ripped something from them, took something they considered their possession. He insulted my family, my fiancé. They won’t forget or forgive. They’ll retaliate. They’ll avenge me with brutal intent.”
“Do you want to be avenged?”
“Remo kidnapped me. He took everything from me.”
“Everything?” Kiara said curiously.
“Everything that used to matter.” I took my chopsticks again and continued eating, hoping Kiara got the hint that I didn’t want to talk anymore.
Remo came to my bedroom again that night. I had expected him and didn’t say anything as he dropped his gun holster on the ground then lay down beside me. I only regarded him, trying to understand him, myself, us. But I saw the same confusion in his eyes that I felt every time he was close.
We were both caught in an undercurrent, dragging us down into its unforgiving depth, unable to swim to the surface on our own. The only people who could save us only wanted to save one of us and see the other drown, but we were entangled. One of us would have to let go first to reach the surface.