“It is all right, Avara, sleep now.” K’llan pronounced, voice soothing as she moved close enough to share her body heat with Serros’s shivering form. With one gentle, pale hand, she stroked dark curls away from Avara’s relaxing lids.
“Thank you, K’llan, for your care.” Avara said, looking into Z’arr’s violet orbs in an attempt to convey her sincerity.
“Any time, Avara.” The Vosaia responded with a sweet smile, then briefly brushed her lips against Serros’s brow. “Go to sleep.”
The last thing Avara was conscious of before welcome somnolence claimed her, was the sense of K’llan carefully tucking up closer to keep her warm.
*
When Avara next awoke, it was to the smell of roasting meat that strongly reminded her of holiday barbecues during her Academy days. The most raucous had been Concordia celebrations back on Pax, with heaps of food, lots of base–driven music, dance, and the acting out of somewhat idiotic thrill–based stunts. All had been coupled with the consumption of copious amounts of alcohol.
Opening her eyes, the Captain saw that the source of the smell was a small example of the local pig–like creatures, speared in twain and tightly secured to a spit. It was hovering over an enthusiastically burning fire, the pig’s outer flesh already turning a light, golden–brown, indicating that the process would be complete in another hour or two.
“Good morning, Captain.” K’llan’s voice came from the right and when she turned her head, she spotted the Vosaia busy at work. She was shredding some of the green–leafed plants they’d discovered were edible. “How are you feeling?”
“Human again, thank you, and very hungry.”
Laughing a bit, K’llan briefly waved her arm and replied, “Well, hopefully we can do something about that.”
“Wow, look at you.” Serros remarked, issuing a low whistle of amazement and admiration at the Vosaia cooking solid food.
With a shyly pleased sort of grin, Z’arr responded, “Well, with my DSA, hunting was fairly simplistic. As far as the cooking, I have observed you enough the past days to give it a go, at least with the animal that seemed to be the easiest to prepare.”
“I’m impressed.” Serros reasserted as she slowly attempted to move into a sitting position. Despite a lance of pain, she was able to make it, if just. Though more than stiff and feeling like every square inch of her body had been systematically beaten and bruised, with a review of her wounds, it seemed they were all closed and healing. Her PV and sleep had done their work well. It also did not escape her notice that her bandages had been changed and, she had no doubt, wounds had been re–treated and another dose of Adrenix administered. Serros also spotted her clothing next to most of K’llan’s, both sets clearly cleaned in the stream and now hanging to dry on some nearby bushes.
“Thank you.” Avara commented, pushing the feeling behind those two words towards her companion. K’llan’s mouth tugged into an acknowledging smile.
Serros then carefully drank a swallow of hydro–fluid and, stomach rumbling like a general ordering troops to muster, took two strips of jerky and slowly began to consume them as she watched Z’arr work. Finally, feeling the call of nature and the driving need to be clean, Avara pushed herself to her feet.
“I think not by yourself, Captain Serros.” K’llan declared as Avara wobbled and hobbled after slipping her feet into boots and clipping her pistol to her waist.
“I’ll be fine.” Serros protested.
“I will escort you to the stream after you’ve handled your latrine needs.” Z’arr responded, her tone determinedly stubborn.
Remembering a bit of wisdom her father had imparted years ago after an adolescent fight between she and her brother Bedwyr, specifically, about it being better to choose one’s battles, Avara nodded in acquiescence then went out of sight to heed the call of nature. Upon her return, she grabbed a small square of soap from one of the kits and K’llan walked with her to the nearby stream, a steadying hand cupping her elbow.
Exhausted as she was by the short trip, when she looked at the shallow rivulet, the thought of being clean was truly gladdening. Z’arr set about positioning their newly acquired second portable generator and security nodes then announced “All right, you should be fine. I will leave you your privacy and return to roasting the animal. I will come back for you in an hour, yes?”
“Yes.”
“Okay then, have fun water–child.” She remarked with a parting smile.
It was beyond delightful to be able to have nothing between her and fresh–running water for the first time in weeks. Having completely removed her clothing, the only items she carried with her into the stream other than soap, was her pistol and harness–rig.
Though incredibly stiff, Avara blissfully spent thirty minutes scrubbing and rescrubbing every inch her body, taking care around the three puckered marks and super tender areas of her bullet wounds. The hot suns overhead were a stark counterpoint to the cool waters, and Avara was once again thankful for the protective dermotic agent in their now resupplied hydro–fluid. That fluid was the only reason the two of them sported only deeper tans (well, Avara, anyway) rather than burn–blistered skin from too much sun exposure.
Though she was too sore to swim, Avara spent the rest of her time just languidly enjoying the play of water as she listed to the sounds of life surrounding the low and slow moving stream.
Avara had just finished pulling on her new red undershirt and trousers when K’llan reappeared and then escorted Serros back to camp. The pig seemed well on its way and additionally, a flat rock of slow cooking greens was over the fire, clearly ready to be eaten. With Serros situated and already making for the cooked vegetables, K’llan headed back to the stream to bathe herself.
When she returned an hour later, the flesh of the pig had begun to crisp and pucker, signaling its readiness to be eaten, and Serros was cutting off slices of the well–tendered meat. Spearing a piece with her knife and taking a bite as she sat back against the same rock close to the low–burning fire, Avara could feel juices dribbling down her chin as she chewed.
“Mm. Not up to Mess Chief Tanner’s standards, of course, but as far as I’m concerned, it beats the finest taberna or restaurant in the entire Aligned Systems.” Serros remarked with feeling. “Well done, K’llan.”
Laughing, Z’arr responded, “I am pleased you like it, Avara.” Serros could feel the truth of the Vosaia’s words, her joy at seeing Avara recovering and content. “I consider that to be quite the compliment, given how everyone aboard Excalibur says that Tanner is the finest Chef in the Fleet.”
“Ha! He is. Took some serious pressure and a hefty salary, but I was able to wrangle him into joining our merry band of galactic do–gooders; rank and position have to have some perks, eh?”
“So it seems. I will say, you seem to have a real talent in convincing the best in every field to join Nova Squad and Excalibur.”
“Present company included.” Avara observed, casting an exaggerated wink in K’llan’s direction as she finished her first thick slab of bacon and started on the next.
“I am serious.” K’llan said, the question implicit in her compliment.
Considering for a moment, Serros responded more seriously, “Yes, well, that is true, I suppose. Belief in and dedication to the mission is as important to me as skill–set. In some ways, maybe even more so.”
“Which is the reason why you formed Nova Squad.”
“Yes.”
“Tell me about it.”
When Avara hesitated, unsure if she wanted to dredge up the painful memories surrounding her decision, K’llan added, “It has to do with the stern faced, golden–haired Admiral, yes?” Her words were both a statement and a question in one.
Of course. The Feeding. Though they still had not discussed what occurred between them, Avara knew the exchange of memory had been real, not just a contained product of being in an altered state of consciousness.
Seeing again in her mind the vision of th
e stunningly beautiful and strong woman who had, for both good and ill, shaped so much of who Avara was today, Serros slowly nodded. “Yes.” Taking another bite of meat, Avara considered where to start. She could feel that this was a topic K’llan had wanted to ask about for a long time, even before the Feeding. That in some way, Avara’s willingness to share the drivers for this crucial turning point in her life was important to her friend.
More, she could empathically sense that K’llan somehow knew this memory was specifically connected with what occurred last night, with Avara’s execution of the Karukai officer.
“VS Operative and Admiral Jehara Vai of the Ministry Navy.” Serros identified name to face. “I have known her for many years. We first met when I was assigned to the MS Niobe right out of the Academy. She was Captain of the ship and I was a shiny grad of twenty–years. Later, after the Battle of Arden Secundus against the Karukai, I had received both a Commendation and a recommendation to join the Human Vigil Star Program. So, Captain Vai was made my lead VS Trainer, meaning that we worked even more closely together.”
Shifting in her seat and continuing to eat, Avara remembered the early days of her naval career. Constant dedication, boundless energy, the relentless push to succeed and prove herself, and an unwavering faith in the Navy and in the Ministry.
And then it all changed.
The thought echoed before she could stop its formation. Not entirely true, but close enough for it to still hurt.
“And you were lovers?” K’llan asked, voice full of gentle sympathy.
Startled, Avara half–coughed out, “No, no; not then, later.” Taking a sip of clear, purified river water than in some ways felt more naturally refreshing than hydro–fluid, Serros continued by saying “Captain Vai and I served together for ten years, until I was granted my first ship, the MS Sollus. She was one of the most important mentors of my life, and over time, had become a good friend. But our relationship was, for the most part, strictly professional. She is only too adept at keeping business and personal attachment separate.” Avara could hear the bitterness in her own voice, and fought to control it.
Serros speared into another helping of bacon like she could stab memory and thus, vanquish painful recollection. “After the VanDorn Strike of 3409 and the death of Nai Fen, Admiral Vai and I came into one another’s orbit again, when I was thirty–three. Our roles had changed quite a bit by that point, for not only was I a Captain in my own right, but I’d already been made a Quorum Shield after the Cipher Action and Operation Blackout, some four years earlier.”
“So you met as equals.” Z’arr supplied, following the Captain’s logic.
“Exactly. As you know, for all practical purposes, being a Quorum Shield Operative sort of trumps other designations, meaning it was defiantly an equalizer between my rank as Captain and hers as a Ministry Admiral.”
Continuing to eat, Avara shrugged as she said forthrightly “And I fell in love with her.”
Looking into K’llan’s sparkling violet eyes, Avara expected to feel some ripple of… unease, perhaps jealously? Such a response would certainly be normal for a Human. But with K’llan, there was only a sense of compassion and acceptance. An understanding that what Avara was sharing with her, past experiences, including former loves that had contributed to her life before their meeting, was an integral part of her person. And thus, in some way, to be cherished. In the totality of Avara’s previous experiences, it was an utterly unique response.
Taking two more swallows of water and continuing to eat, though more slowly than before, Avara picked up where she’d left off. “We were together for five years and overall, they were good years, if a bit strained by our respective responsibilities. Yet unlike with Fen, we made that work. After all, we both knew what we were signing up for, shared the same career, same sense of purpose. Then in 3414, the Cindrex Affair took place. Do you know of it?”
Intelligent eyes attentive, K’llan replied thoughtfully “The Cindrex Gang, a viscous and highly effective free–lance group of Karukai slave raiders that had been terrorizing the outer systems. They were eventually captured by… you, yes?”
“Yes.”
“But, if I recall…. Some sort of bargain resulted in their release. It was very hushed, so despite my position in the Vosaia STF, I was never privy to the full details. Only that the Cindrex Gang was soon back to its old activities until they were again stopped, this time permanently.”
“You have the most salient points, yes.” Avara affirmed, a grim smile playing about her mouth, though her eyes and heart felt like stone trapped in glaciated ice.
“That memory I experienced… You were the one who stopped them.” K’llan asserted into the silence that had fallen between them.
In her mind, a vision of herself arose, hunting Karukai after Karukai down, through space station to jungle planet, to desert. And executing each for crimes against Humanity and all Sentients. Much as she had killed, murdered really, if she’s fully honest with herself, Sub–Lieutenant Icha Hyre, yesterday eve.
And she regretted it not at all, only the circumstance that created the need.
Avara could feel by the emotional spill dripping from K’llan she was exactly aware of what Serros was feeling, and that she could see it in her mind as well.
“It was Admiral Jehara Vai who ordered that the five senior–most members and leaders of the Cindrex Gang be released, in exchange for some intelligence deemed vital to Ministry Naval Security.”
Looking directly at K’llan, feeling the old pain, the betrayal, rip into her once more… it was as if it was happening in the present, here and now, on the scourged surface of Dantis. Voice rising, Avara explained “I argued vehemently against the action. I warned Jehara what would happen, that the raiders would return to their old habits, that innocents would be hurt, would die.”
With unfalling tears she’d thought long shed, Avara choked out, “I even begged, begged her on our love! I said that if she loved me, she wouldn’t do this; would not release them.” Feeling the old blackening sense of helplessness and rage, Avara half–whispered “She said she knew that, knew they would return to their old pursuits, but that sacrifices had to be made for the greater good, and that I was to leave it… not track them, not stop them, but leave it. On that day, she betrayed every ideal I thought we shared.”
Trembling with remembrance and the feeling of unadulterated, pure regard that K’llan Z’arr was silently, but steadily sending her way like a sturdy little life–boat in a rocking sea, Avara continued in a bleak tone “Well, I may have left Jehara at our exchange, but I could not leave the Cindrex Gang. Especially when I began receiving reports of more missing people. Colonists mostly, but spacers as well. Hundreds of people… taken, brutalized, raped, enslaved, and murdered, of all ages, all species. The worst was the hit on Saint Martine Station. Elders deemed of no use but who dared to resist were stripped and tortured, and then placed in life–pods filled with Kahd’he who’s larvae ate them alive from the inside. A message writ in cruelty to those who refused to surrender in the future.”
Feeling like her vision was going dark, Avara pronounced in brutally cold voice “On Quorum Shield authority, I hunted down each and every single Karukai raider and executed her.” Feeling the dark satisfaction of the justice she’d wrought, Avara again relived those days, her efforts to stop the slavers from ever harming another again. And in doing so, attempt to create personal atonement for going along with a decision that she’d known to be wrong.
“After, I took a leave of absence from the Human Ministry Navy and for close to two years, only worked Shield Ops. At the same time, I sought employment gratis as a free–lance mercenary. I chose the jobs I wanted, efforts that I deemed a benefit to those who were ignored or marginalized but needed the help. Finally, I went to my old friend and mentor, Delegate Jamie Sweetwater, with the concept for Nova Squad. As a Quorum Delegate rather than a Ministry Representative, he signed off immediately and had Excalibur commissioned. And here w
e are today.”
Her eyes closed and with the three suns rising to their high position in the hot afternoon heat, quiet fell between them for a time. Avara fought to release the old burden and pain that, though faced and fashioned into productive output, still hurt to this day. Until now, the only people other than Admiral Vai who intimately knew the full events surrounding what was deemed the “Cindrex Affair,” were Marcus, Gaius, Diana, and of course, Jamie. And now K’llan.
In a whisper, Avara felt the Vosaia’s approach, could hear the crunch of boots in gravel and sensed Z’arr as she knelt down before her and then placed cool fingers on either side of her neck. “I am sorry, Avara, for the betrayal by one you trusted. You deserved better. But never doubt, those victimized by the Karukai did get better. They got you, to fight for them when others would not. And the same is true for so many people in the Quorum Systems today.”
Letting K’llan’s words wash over her like a balm, Avara opened her lids only to fall into the extraordinary violet depths of the Vosaia’s eyes, the unmitigated and undeniable warmth that Z’arr felt for her. “You are the most beautiful person I have ever encountered, Avara Ceridwen Serros.” Without any sense of expectation, K’llan gathered Avara close in a tight, full–hearted embrace, letting her sincerity and belief sing towards the Captain, providing shelter for Serros’s turbulent thoughts and emotions.
Avara returned the tight hold gratefully, thinking to herself that the same could easily be said about K’llan. Though she let the feeling flow, not wanting to rock the peace of the moment, she chose not to vocalize thought. Instead, Avara pulled gently away but gifted K’llan with a full smile. “Thank you, K’llan.
“As I said before, anytime.” Her voice was playful, yet held sincere promise all the same. A moment later, she added, “You should finish eating, perform your Synergy meditation, then rest.”
Easily assessing her continued weariness, Avara could only agree. “Yes, true, and then enough caretaking of me. You need to Feed.”
The peace of their easy state was slightly pierced by the needle of unease and need that vibrated within and off of K’llan, but instead of refuting Serros’s words, she simply nodded. Replaying the events of the last twenty–four hour cycle, Avara finished her meal and then slipped into her healing trance, working to cure not only body from injury, but also mind and heart.
Nova Page 33