“The benefits must outweigh the burdens,” I decided. “She performs an important function for you?”
Otherwise, another owl or other familiar would have sufficed. Even I would prefer Julius 2.0 to a Meiko.
“Yes” was all he said, and his tone ended that line of questioning.
“What happened with your student?” I was not going to ask the obvious question. It was none of my business if he snuggled up to Catwoman each night he spent in the city. Served me right for comparing him to Batman. “Better yet—why did you keep her?”
“The student, who was mortified, called security. The guards escorted Meiko out to the quad, where she shifted and fled. I got called in after numerous complaints about both the cat and the woman.” He looked tired just recalling the incidents. “She was bred to be a familiar, though it’s against the law to bind a sentient creature that way. She had no pride to take her in, no education, and no means of supporting herself. I didn’t know what to do with her, and she was so traumatized from the familiar bond breaking she remained a cat for the first two years after I brought her home.” He frowned. “At the time, it didn’t seem odd keeping her as a pet. She let me forget she was more than a house cat.”
“And then one day she was a beautiful naked woman again.” Evil as it was to bait him, I couldn’t help myself when he blushed that way. “Can’t put one of those out on the street, either.”
“I can’t win this argument, can I?”
“Nope.” All his talk of familiars did make me curious. “How does Julius feel about her?”
“Julius was not impressed with her and chose to live in the atrium at Strophalos rather than share the loft. I gave Meiko away six or seven times during those early years to peers I felt could handle her brand of magic and provide her with a comfortable home.” He wiggled his fingers at me. “The problem with a shapeshifting cat are thumbs.”
“She came back each time.”
“I don’t know why she stays. I’m rarely home. She’s alone all day.”
“What I’m hearing is free room and board in the safest building in the city under the protection of the man responsible for keeping it that way.” Poor Linus. I would have thought him above manipulation tactics considering who raised him, but…gorgeous nudist. “She’s playing you, and she’s going to keep on until you change the locks.”
“I can hear you two,” a shrill voice called up to us.
“No one cares, Meiko,” I yelled back before pegging Linus with a look. “More than anything else, this tells me there’s no woman in your life.”
“I am female,” Meiko growled. “I am in his life.”
“Still don’t care,” I hollered then got back to Linus. “No woman would put up with that.”
“You could have asked me if I was involved with someone.” His auburn lashes kissed his cheeks as he closed his eyes. “If you were curious.”
“I didn’t mean—” I pulled the covers up to my chin. “That’s not—”
“You’re such a little liar,” Meiko spat, her tone growing as coarse as a cat’s tongue.
“Meiko.” A sigh moved through him. “No.”
“I am not a dog to be given orders,” she hissed.
Glass shattered, a concussive blast, and loud purring revved her engine. No doubt a vase had met its doom, smashed against the concrete floor after she accidentally swished her tail too hard or licked her paw the wrong way while sitting next to it.
Briefly, I wondered if I could barricade the narrow staircase for the night. “Are you sure it’s safe for you to sleep down there?”
“She won’t hurt me.” He massaged his hands. “She’ll tire herself out soon.”
Plink. Crack. Smash.
Those weren’t the sounds of a cat giving up on revenge. “Do you want to hang out with me until she winds down?”
Eyes opening, he held out his arms. “Toss me a pillow?”
“Not until I examine you. You’re still rubbing your fingers like they ache.” I shoved upright and ordered him to take a seat beside me. Once I gathered his hands in my lap, I got a good look at what my sigil had done to him. His palms were blistered, his elegant fingers raw and swollen. From wrist to fingertip, his hands appeared sunburnt. “Why didn’t you treat this? Or ask Dr. Schmidt for ointment?”
“I did treat them,” he said quietly.
“How much worse?” Stomach plummeting into my toes, I caught him by the chin when he didn’t answer. “How. Much. Worse?”
Inky tendrils filled the spaces between his pupils and irises, flooding his eyes until blackness pooled from corner to corner. “To the bone,” he said at last, his gaze fixed on me. “I was charred to the bone.”
And yet he had challenged the ward, battered it until I relented and let him reach me.
“Goddess.” Releasing his chin, I threw my arms around his shoulders and yanked him close. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“That ward saved your life.” Linus was about as cuddly as an ice sculpture in my arms until he started melting against me in slow increments. “I’m proud of you, and you should be too. You defended yourself and Neely until help arrived.”
“That part does not suck,” I allowed. “Do you have a pen handy? I want to try something.”
Linus raised one hip and produced his pen, which he offered to me. “What do you have in mind?”
“The sigil that hurt you was mine, drawn in my blood.” I reached out, and his hand closed over mine. He cocked an eyebrow, waiting on an answer. “I’m going to need that hand back.” I wiggled my fingers where they gripped the cap. “If I draw this on with my left hand, goddess knows what might happen. I don’t want your hand to explode or—” given the sigil responsible in the first place, “—ignite.”
His sudden release plopped me back on my butt, but he steadied me with a hand on my shoulder. “Which sigil do you have in mind?”
“That’s the something part.” I squirmed under his regard. “I figure if instinct got me into this mess, then instinct can get me out again.”
“All right.” He shifted closer, extended a hand, and waited. “I’m ready.”
“You’re not worried I’ll maim you?” I cradled his palm in mine. “A necromancer’s hands are their livelihood.”
“I trust you.” He gave my words back to me. “Besides, I won’t exactly be destitute with or without them.”
“There is that.” I snorted a laugh. “Okay, here we go.”
Closing my eyes, I gave myself free rein to design. Pretending his skin was no different than the pages of my grimoire, I followed the tug in my gut to dictate each curl and swoop. A flush warmed his fingers, and my eyes popped open. I was terrified I had managed to set him on fire for real.
The angry redness in his hands disappeared, fading along with the feverish heat, until I held his cool fingers in mine, his skin smooth and flawless. Well, except for the charming freckles I suspected covered every inch of him.
And that was not a helpful thought to have while sitting on his bed.
“All better.” I capped the pen and set it on the mattress to prevent more accidental touching. “See for yourself.”
“This is remarkable.” Linus examined each knuckle and nail, crease and fold, and his proud smile was blinding. “You are remarkable.”
“I bet you say that to all the girls who maim and then heal you.”
“I mean it, Grier.” This time when he flexed his fingers, his face didn’t pinch with hurt. “Do you think you could teach me the sigil you used?”
“Probably not.” I nibbled on my bottom lip. “No offense.”
“I understand.” His fingertips rubbed together as though reacquainting themselves with one another. “We all have trade secrets.”
“It’s not that.” Good thing he was into self-experimentation. “I don’t know what I did. I wasn’t looking.”
A laugh shot out of him and ricocheted through the loft, startling a growl out of Meiko.
“Where’s your pho
ne?” I searched the bed, unable to remember if I had returned it yet. “We can snap a few pictures of what hasn’t flaked off and recreate it when we get home.”
Home.
Savannah was home. For me. This—Atlanta—was his.
Yet another reason not to get attached to him.
“It’s in my back pocket.” Linus shifted his weight to one side. “Can you reach it? I don’t want to risk scraping off the ink.”
Careful not to cop a feel, I pinched his phone between my fingers and tugged it free. “Unlock it, please.” I rested it on his thigh then angled my head away to give him privacy, but he didn’t budge for concern over flaking. “Do you need help?”
Fingers outstretched, he glanced up at me. “Do you mind?”
“You’ll have to reset your password after this,” I teased. “Who knows what secrets I could unearth if I dug around on your phone long enough?”
“You can look if you want.” He held still while I took a series of shots, with and without the blinding flash. “I don’t mind.”
I got the sense he wanted to prove something to me, that by sharing the contents of his phone—which, for most people encapsulated their whole lives—he was entrusting part of himself to me. It was the kind of act that begged for reciprocation. You show me yours, and I’ll show you mine. But I wasn’t ready for that.
“I don’t want to invade your privacy.” That sounded polite and not panicky. “There are things on my phone I wouldn’t want anyone else to see. Selfies mostly.” I passed him back his device. “I’ve been trying to replicate this winged eyeliner thing Neely does, but it’s beyond me. Pretty sure he busts a gut laughing at my attempts when I text them to him.”
“Why the sudden interest in makeup?” Linus scratched his hands where the dried ink pulled his skin. “I don’t remember you wearing it except on special occasions.” He answered his own question. “Boaz.”
There was no point in lying. I had wanted to look nice for him once upon a time.
“Yeah.” I shrugged. “I gave up on it, though. I would rather beg or bribe Neely into glamming me.” A pang rocked through me when I recalled how pale and broken he’d looked hanging there from his seat belt. “Cruz must have lost his mind when he got the call,” I said softly. “Neely is his whole world.”
“I’ll take you to see him tomorrow before we meet Reardon,” Linus promised.
“Thanks.” My jaw, which must have finished healing thanks to all the magic Linus pushed through me, didn’t twinge when I yawned. “I apologize in advance for my nightmare waking you. If it gets too bad, just toss a pillow up here at me or something. I don’t want to get you in trouble with your neighbors.”
“I etched soundproofing sigils into the floors. You won’t bother anyone.”
A shiver tickled over my skin, the idea of no one hearing me scream if Meiko tried to off me in my sleep as much of a relief as it was a worry. “Except you.”
“I’ll use earplugs if you don’t want to be disturbed.” A slight rise in his eyebrows left it to me to decide.
As if I would be the one bothered by hearing my screams or watching my thrashing.
“That would probably be for the best.” I rubbed my arms, sheepish. “If you wake me up, I’ll only go right back to where I left off in my dream. You can’t save me from it.”
His lips parted like he wanted to argue, but he wisely closed his mouth. I wasn’t interested in sigils or in sedatives. Enduring the dream sucked, I had to agree there, but it’s not like it stuck with me after I woke. All I had to do was survive the day. Easy-peasy. Sure it was.
“Sleep well, Grier.”
Not likely. “Good luck.”
Linus took the stairs down, and I got comfortable in his bed. Sleep forced me to chase it, but eventually, I caught it with both hands.
Twelve
He has a new girlfriend. His third one this week. Just as mundane as all the rest.
Why not me? Why won’t he ask me? I would say yes. He knows I would say yes. Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe I should play hard to get. Maybe then he would see we were meant to…
The carpet squishes under my feet, and cold slime seeps between my toes. I shiver, confused, my anger at Boaz forgotten. The smell hits me then, copper and rose water and thyme.
Maud.
I collapse to my knees beside her and scoop the icy blood back into the gaping hole in her chest.
“Maud?”
The sobs start, and I can’t stop them. I’m working as fast as I can, but her heart—her heart—it’s missing.
“Wake up. Please wake up. Please, Maud. Wake up. Please.”
Shivers dapple my arms, and my teeth chatter, but it doesn’t matter. None of it matters if she won’t open her eyes. I’ll be alone again. All alone. Maud is all I have, and she’s…
She’s gone.
She’s dead.
Dead.
Using her blood for my ink, I start drawing a sigil, one I’ve never seen in any textbooks.
“No, Grier,” a voice pleads behind me. “Stop before it’s too late.”
I woke screaming her name.
Maud. Maud. Maud.
Throat raw, lips chapped, I panted through a panic attack while I adjusted to my surroundings. I was tucked so deep in the crack of the wall, the sloped ceiling rested on top of my head.
Snatches of conversation, too faint for me to remember, too devastating for me to forget, echoed through my head, pinging off the walls of my skull then bouncing into oblivion as I woke fully.
What had I dreamed? What had I dreamed? What had I dreamed?
Already, the fine details eluded me, leaving behind vague dread and fresh grief.
“Are you finished?” a brassy voice snapped. “My ears are ringing.”
Climbing from my hidey-hole, I crawled to the edge of the loft and peered down at a flurry of activity.
Racks of clothes had been wheeled in and pushed against the walls. Boxes of shoes towered in one corner while purses and other accessories cluttered the couch. Wafer-thin women dressed to the nines fluttered between piles, cooing and flattering Meiko, who presided over the affair from the center of the room.
The scene wrecked me with its familiarity, and a sour taste flooded my mouth.
I’m safe, safe, safe.
The similarities proved too strong until all I could hear was that last conversation with Lena the night I executed my escape from Volkov, and the Master.
“Have you put any more thought into what I should wear tomorrow night?”
“I do have some ideas.” She hesitated, uncertain if I actually cared about her opinion. “Would you like me to show you?”
“I want to look my best.” I offered her my hand. “I might need help getting back in bed, though. Do you mind?”
“Not at all.” She carried me back to bed and propped me up with pillows. “Wait just a tick, and I’ll be right back with my top choices.” Her smile widened. “Then we can talk about accessories.”
The clothes. The bed. The flitting helpers. It was all too much. I hated all of it until my eyes crossed.
Linus. I needed Linus. Where was he?
“Cookie, Cookie.” Meiko sneered, her cherry lips curling. “Are there crumbs in his bed?”
“Why not ask him,” I said, aware I was being nasty but too stung to curb my tongue. “What is all this?”
“Your new wardrobe.” She cocked a silk-clad hip and planted a manicured hand below the chain mail belt cinching her emerald dress tight. Clothes. She was wearing clothes. And, of course, she looked as good in them as she did out of them. The fabric was the exact color of her eyes. “That was the purpose of last night’s debacle, was it not?”
“Yes.”
She tapped one toe made viciously sharp by her glittering pumps. “And your mission was unsuccessful, correct?”
“Yes.”
Tired of waiting for me to make the connection, she shrugged. “Then I don’t see the issue.”
Woozy. I
was getting woozy. So woozy.
I told myself it was the height, but I knew it was memory warping the scene before me, twisting it into a nightmare tableau where vampire guards might storm the room and haul me before the Master at the slightest provocation.
“I’d heard you were broken.” She dismissed the others with a wave. “I suppose even rumor mills are bound to churn out the truth now and again.”
“I’m not broken.” Catwoman wasn’t snatching a morsel of progress from me. “I’m…mending.”
“Prove it.” She trailed a fingertip down the sleeves of the shirts on the rack nearest her, showcasing the department store she had brought to me. “Either you wear your past, or it wears you.”
A sick certainty knotted my gut. “You know.”
About Lena. About the clothes. About polishing me until I shined.
“Linus was right about me.” Her plump lips smashed together. “I am a liar.” She picked invisible lint from her gown. “Although I wasn’t lying when I said I can pluck your worst fears from your head.”
Meaning she had been taunting me with the naked-woman routine, but this… This was designed to hurt. “That’s comforting.”
“Believe it or not, I was trying to behave since you’ll be gone in a couple of days.” Her tone promised she would never see me again, and it made me question what Linus had told her about his long-term plans. “You’re not worth upsetting my applecart over.”
Again, I wondered what role she filled in his household, and again I reminded myself it was none of my business. “So, what’s all this about then?”
“Why go to the shops,” she said, smirking, “when we can bring the shops to you?”
“You don’t get it.” I sat down before toppling face-first over the edge. “Part of the fun—okay, actually all of the fun—was the experience of going out with my friend.” Buying the clothes was necessity. Goofing off with Neely would have been the only highlight of the experience. “He’s got an eye for this kind of thing, and I haven’t seen him much lately. This trip was going to be an apology for being a lame friend.”
How to Break an Undead Heart Page 16