by Howe, Cheryl
“Yes. I’m going to. At least for a while. And if you don’t come back, I’ll have to accept your decision. I can’t say I’ll marry. I can’t say I won’t. I can’t say what I’ll do, but I’ll go on. But if you feel half of what I do, Christopher, you’ll come back.”
He bowed his head and stared at their joined hands. “You have too much faith in me, Lorelei. You have too much faith in everything.”
She turned his hands over and rubbed her thumbs across his callused palms. “I have enough for both of us, if you’d only give me a chance.”
He gazed at her, unable to say anything. What he wanted to say was yes, to put himself in her hands, to give up trying to know everything—but he couldn’t. So instead he pulled her against him. He brushed her long hair with his palm, the sensation flowing up his arm like a warm river.
The heat of her body teased him through her nightgown. The arousal he’d struggled with since she walked in the room became uncontrollable, but the urge to make love to her was wrapped up with so many tangled emotions, he felt tied. He feared making a move would strangle him.
She snuggled against him until she lay across his lap. If she moved one knee, she’d be straddling him. The way she arched her hips into his sang a blatant invitation.
“Lorelei, I want to make love to you,” he finally said.
She slid her palms up his bare chest to cup his face. She kissed him softly, her mouth pliant and parted. “I want that too.”
He greedily kissed her again, opening his mouth wider to taste her before he said what he had to say. She responded so eagerly. Her body would be just as open, just as sweet. He pulled his mouth away from hers and swallowed hard.
“I can’t promise you anything. This doesn’t mean I’ve changed my mind.”
She smiled as if he had said something amusing. “I didn’t come here for a promise. I came here to feel you, if only for one last time. If this is the only way you can let me get close to you, then I’ll take it.” She slid her hand between them and gripped him through his wool trousers. “This is why I came into your room into the middle of the night, silly.”
The feel of her fingers circling him, teasing his rigid flesh with the rough cloth, made him buck slightly. Much more of that and he’d never make it inside her. He pulled her against him fiercely, forcing her to straddle him. He’d never been so glad to be called silly. In fact, that was something he’d never been called, but, God, he liked it.
He slid his hands up her thighs, bunching her gown past her hips and cupping her bare bottom as he arched against her. She unbuttoned his pants, then eased the flaps aside. Eagerly she slid against his length. Her warmth seared away all conscious thoughts except one. He pulled his mind away from surging into her. They were going too fast and he wanted his time with Lorelei to last.
When he grabbed the hem of her gown and drew it over her head, she lifted her arms to help him. Shadows wrapped around her feminine curves, but he saw every one with a second sight. Her high, full breasts, the dip of her waist, the flare of her hips, and most especially the secret cleft between her thighs, all burned into his senses. He gripped her hips and nudged her against him in a rocking motion. His eyes grew heavy, but he kept them open. Watching her was as pleasurable as the feel of her warm, wet opening riding him, tempting him beyond endurance.
She looked so perfect, as if she were created for him. Her dark hair flowed over her shoulders. A single lock fell over one breast, emphasizing the red, aroused nipple peeking through. He brushed her hair aside, sitting up to take that teasing flesh into his mouth.
She writhed as he sucked her, keeping the rocking connection of their bodies a spiraling pleasure and a constant torture. The taste of her skin intoxicated him to the point of dizziness. She gripped his shoulders and leaned her head back while she arched her hips forward.
The urge to shift her, to penetrate her, was too strong. He slid from beneath her to halt his body’s imminent insubordination. She made a soft sound in the back of her throat, letting him know she didn’t like the change. He maneuvered her to her back and got off the bed to work his pants the rest of the way off. She propped herself up on her elbows and watched him.
Liking her gaze on him, he slowed his movements. After he shucked his pants, he straightened. He stood before her, his chest heaving, his breath coming fast. A smile curled her lips. He smiled too. He’d never get tired of that bold stare. He crawled onto the bed, feeling more intimidated by her blatant appraisal than he’d like to admit. “Like what you see?”
“Very much,” she said. “Is it all for me?” She wrapped her hand around his jutting arousal in a tight, confident grip.
He jerked back. “Yes, ma’am.” She held on, stroking him to the tip, then sliding her hand back to the root. He gasped and grabbed her wrist. “Slow down.”
She hooked her hands behind his neck and tried to pull him closer. When he didn’t comply, she squirmed under him, brushing the tips of her strained nipples against his chest.
“Why? It seems like forever since we were together.”
Braddock stilled, his smile fading. This would have to last them forever, because there would be no next time. She must have seen his shift in mood, because she dropped her hands from his neck. Her body sagged against the mattress. Braced on his hands and knees, he hovered above her, trying to memorize her features, but now she was the one frowning.
He forced a slight smile and kissed the tip of her nose. All the things he thought to say would only make her frown deepen. He wanted to tell her goodbye the best way he could. Wanted her to remember him by this night. But even he didn’t think he could stand to hear to those words spoken aloud.
He eased down to his elbows and kissed her on the mouth, swirling his tongue against hers for endless moments. The sensation sent urgent sparks to his straining cock. He pulled away, then kissed her neck, their joined mouths causing too much sensation.
He blew on her ear and she turned her head, laughing.
“I’ve been thinking about you, Lorelei. Every night. I want to show you what I’ve been thinking.”
That put the smile back on her face. He had definitely unleashed a temptress with a sexual appetite to rival any man’s. The bastard who got to be her husband would be one lucky bastard. Braddock pushed the thought away.
When she drew her knees up and arched her back, he forgot to think anything.
“Show me,” she crooned.
Why wait? Why resist? The question rang like a command. He leaned back on his heels, hooked his hands under her thighs, and spread her wider. “Are you ready for me?”
She didn’t stop him, just laid her head back and opened for him. “Yes,” she drawled with her eyes closed.
“Let’s see.”
He inhaled her desire before he tasted her. It was a heady experience, almost too much. He licked her, then slipped a finger inside, and that was enough. Her heat seared him. The sound of her soft moan ignited all his other senses. Enough was enough.
He positioned himself over her and drove in with one long thrust, lifting her with its intensity.
She opened her eyes in surprise, then gripped his shoulders, steadying herself after his demanding entry.
They were nose to nose. “This is what I’ve been thinking about.”
“I’ve been thinking about you, too.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his hips as if it were going to be a rough ride and she were holding on for dear life.
Smart girl, he thought before his body took the luxury away. He moved his hips, arching up with each thrust. Going slowly, making love to her as he’d been taught wasn’t going to happen. Each alluring thrust dragged him deeper into a world of pure physical lust. He was lost in the need of his body. All he could do was move, desperately grabbing her with each stroke.
Her breath came warm and heavy on his neck. She was straining as hard as he. He could hear her pleasure and desperation on each rhythmic exhalation.
He slid his hands un
der her back, wrapping one arm around her, pulling her to him tightly, while he cradled her skull with the other. He held her head so his mouth could take her breath as he took her body.
Urgency piled on top of itself until he was desperate for release. He went harder and deeper, his grip tightening. He couldn’t stop this. Couldn’t control it.
He had a vague sense of her stiffening in his arms. He tried to clear his mind enough to loosen his hold, fearing he was seriously hurting her. Her slick passage clenched around him and all hope of releasing her was lost. Acute pleasure squeezed the breath from his lungs. He thought he yelled but it came out as something deeply silent, like the quaking of the earth under a rumbling thunder. He came hard and slow. All his pent up lust and emotion ripped from him in wrenching spasms. He peaked a second time, sure his heart had burst.
He collapsed, his head dropping into the crook of her neck and shoulder. He angled himself so his hip sank into the lumpy mattress, sparing her his full weight. The sweat from his body seared them together. He could feel the throbbing of his own heart through her.
Lorelei rubbed his back in large, calming swirls, then brushed back his wet hair. The sound of his breathing filled the room. He jerked involuntarily as a lingering spasm gripped him.
“Are you all right?” she asked with a smile in her voice. She knew what she’d done to him.
He lifted his head just enough to gaze at her. She had a contented grin on her face, and he didn’t think her satisfaction came from his performance as a lover.
He laid his head back down. “Sorry.” He wasn’t sure that he was sorry he’d lost control, but he wasn’t ready to think that hard yet.
She rolled over, easily overpowering him. He was too limp to do anything but follow her movements. She arranged them both on their sides, face to face. Her fingers brushed his lips. “How could you be sorry? For what?”
“I lost control.”
“I know. I liked it.”
“You could get pregnant.”
She dropped her gaze. “I can’t say I’d be sorry if I did.”
He stiffened and tried to sit up. “Lorelei—”
“Don’t say it.” She braced her hand on his chest. “I know you won’t stay. I don’t care. I’d still love your child.”
He caught his breath, and his heartbeat steadied enough for him to see her clearly. If she did wind up carrying his child, there was no other place he’d rather have her than with Jay and his family. But he didn’t want to think about that now. He was still too sated from their encounter to have room for regret. He’d have the rest of his life for that.
She relaxed against him, looking pretty satisfied herself. Her lips were redder than normal, and a flush spread over her cheeks and across her breasts. He remembered the gripping pleasure of her body that had sent him over the edge. A grin spread across his face, and, unbelievably, that wasn’t the only part of him to stir. “So you, ah ...”
“Yes.” She playfully pinched his nipple. “As if you didn’t know.”
“I knew,” he crowed in a whisper.
The silence settled between them. He reached out and stroked her cheek, gazed in her eyes, and almost made a terrible mistake. She didn’t seem to notice, only closed her eyes and snuggled against him.
He held her tighter instead of telling her he loved her. That was something he dared not say. Not now. It would be too cruel to give her false hope. He was too much of a coward to reveal himself like that, so the thief in him held on to what he could grab in the moment. And yet he still wanted more.
***
Lorelei sauntered down the kitchen’s side steps, two sweating glasses in her hand, just as Braddock poised to backhand Corey. He let go of the kid’s collar and stepped away. He pretended to study the distant cotton fields so he could compose himself before he had to face Lorelei. He hadn’t been going to hit the kid hard, only shake him up enough to get him talking.
He turned back to see her hand a jar half full of murky water to her brother. Corey greedily gulped the contents instead of saying anything.
Lorelei turned to Braddock and handed him the second jar, her smile as sweet as a kiss.
“Thanks, sweetheart,” he said, unable to stop himself.
“I’m going to puke,” grumbled Corey.
Braddock cut his gaze to the kid. With Lorelei between them, Corey didn’t intimidate as easily. He was a royal pain in the ass any way Braddock saw it.
“I’m tired of the crap, kid. Are you going to tell me what I want to know or not?”
Lorelei put her finger to her lips. “Little Chris and Rachel are still around. Do you want them to hear you?”
“Sorry.” Braddock brought the rim of the jar to his lips and hesitated. One quick glance at Lorelei told him he had better not sniff the cloudy mixture first. She smiled in anticipation, as if she had just handed him some kind of special gift. He braced himself and took a gulp. Lemonade! The tartly sweet tang puckered his mouth and showered him with a flood of memories. Summertime and careless days washed over him. He stared at Lorelei. How he wished he’d known her then.
“Can you believe Beth had lemons? A neighbor has a tree. I haven’t had lemonade since before the war.”
Neither had he, but he couldn’t seem to do anything except stare at the glow in Lorelei’s eyes. Every time he looked at her he felt all soft inside and lost his whole taste for Mulcahy and the gold. He’d rather drink lemonade with Lorelei.
He locked his gaze on Corey, a safer target. The boy’s smug expression reminded Braddock that Mulcahy wouldn’t disappear just because he had lost interest. He grabbed the other dining room chair Beth had insisted they take out behind the house for their talk. He’d tried to refuse, but didn’t want her to know he planned to beat the information out of Corey rather than have a civil conversation.
Placing the chair in front of Corey, he sat down. He gulped the rest of his lemonade in one long swallow. No sense in lingering over something he couldn’t have. He took Corey’s half full glass and handed both to Lorelei.
“I’m not finished,” complained the kid.
“You are now.” Braddock made his gaze threat enough.
“I can see this isn’t going well.” Lorelei’s slight smile belied her words. She practically levitated with happiness, which made Braddock smile in return.
She had left him well before dawn. He’d hated letting her go a moment before he had to, but farmers rose early. If Beth or the kids caught her in his room, they’d have a wedding on their hands by sunset.
Corey glanced to Braddock and then back to his sister. He frowned, but withheld any comments on the obvious change in his sister’s mood.
“Go inside, Lori. This is between me and Braddock.”
Braddock rubbed his hand over his mouth and studied Corey. If Corey could use his sister for subterfuge, he usually did. The kid glared back at him, a glint of accusation in his narrowed eyes. Damn. Suddenly Braddock felt like a criminal slated for interrogation.
Lorelei put her hands on her hips, confronting Corey with none of Braddock’s reluctance. “I’ll go in once you promise to give Christopher the information he needs.”
Corey sneered. “I’ll tell him what he needs to know.”
The side door slammed, saving Braddock the effort of appearing calm. Archie staggered out toward them, prompting Lorelei to rush to his aid. Corey stood and watched them, turning his back on Braddock.
Braddock raked his palm over his face, grateful for the distraction. Corey had the upper hand and Braddock didn’t like it. That he deserved Corey’s disdain he liked even less. Making love to Lorelei last night had been selfish and irresponsible. His leaving would be that much harder for both of them. He wouldn’t be able to wipe the indignant look off Corey’s face with any satisfaction.
“Are you all right, Archie?” Lorelei’s worried voice brought Braddock back to the present.
Archie looked like hell. Sweat slicked his hair to his head and beaded on his face. His clothes hun
g in awkward angles. He appeared to have been wadded up in a saddlebag and ridden across the country. When you hadn’t been sober in weeks, or in Archie’s case, maybe years, the hangover had to be brutal.
“I just need some air, Miss Lorelei.” Archie swayed toward her before staggering past.
She caught his arm. “Let me help you, Archie. Beth told me of a spring a few yards from the house. Let’s see if we can find it.”
“I’d be ever so grateful.” Without his slur, it was obvious Archie was a Southerner and a gentleman, or had been once.
He paused in front of Braddock’s chair. “I implore you one more time, sir. Take me to a town. Any town.”
Braddock gazed up at him. “What about Beth and the baby?”
Archie covered his bleary eyes. They were so red it was a wonder he could see from them. “I’d be no good to her.”
Braddock shrugged. “You shouldn’t have told her you were a doctor. She has her heart set on you delivering her baby.”
“I used to be a doctor.” Archie dropped his hand. “Why did you listen to me, anyway?”
“You never shut up. How could we not listen to you?”
Lorelei gave him a harsh look and shook her head. “You said you liked to deliver babies, Archie. Please stay. Beth said the midwife who lived near here moved away. If you don’t do it, I’ll have to. And I know you can do a better job than me.”
Archie tried to disengage himself from Lorelei’s grip. “Thank you for your consideration, Miss Lorelei. You shouldn’t see me like this.”
“We’ve seen you worse, Archie,” said Corey. “But we still like you. Do me a favor and let Lori take care of you so I can talk to Braddock about Mulcahy.”
If it were possible, Archie’s pallor turned a few shades lighter. He suddenly clamped his hand over his mouth. Braddock sprang from his chair just in case Archie lost his breakfast. After a moment, the man took a big shuddering breath that returned a touch of yellow to his colorless cheeks.
He let Lorelei guide him toward the spring without any resistance.
“You’d better talk to him, Corey,” she called over her shoulder. “You’ll be talking to me if you don’t.”