by April Hunt
“Come in,” Penny called.
The door squeaked on its hinges as it opened. Rafe stepped into the hut, eyes scanning the modest interior. “You’ve been granted your own suite.”
She squeezed her eyes closed at the sound of his voice. His presence filled the small room, diffusing his warmth straight into her lower abdomen. She pulled herself together with a few deep breaths and nearly fell apart again when their gazes clashed in the mirror.
His stare raised her heart rate to an unhealthy triple time. They were alone. Finally. And she was scared out of her ever-lovin’ mind. Her body warred with her head, and her heart was flying off in an entirely different direction.
She shifted on her feet. “I think it was less about giving me my own space and more for preserving Rosita’s sanity. I’m pretty sure I heard her muttering about overbearing, oversized American men. Know anything about that?”
“Nope.” He remained straight-faced except for the slight twitch of his upper lip. “But it looks as though I’ve been ousted, too. I’m beginning to think the village elders have given us approval to have a little husband-and-wife time.”
Their gazes simultaneously strayed to the leaf-mattress bed tucked into the corner of the room. Minuscule was the term that came to mind. Constructed of roughly cut lumber and with a mattress support made of an intricate latticework of rope and vine, the thing would barely contain Penny, much less the two of them.
“Cozy.” Rafe half smirked.
Too cozy. Penny could practically touch the palpable tension with her fingertips. God, she’d missed him over the last week. Her body manifested his lack of closeness much like an addict needing a fix, with unsteady hands and racing heart.
She dried her palms on the thin cotton shift Rosita had given her before forcing her thoughts in the exact opposite direction of where her body wanted to go. “Rosita mentioned that the village’s hunting party was planning to lead us to Mocoron. I don’t like the idea. I mean, what if Fuentes finds out? I don’t want him to punish them for helping us.”
“I already told the elders we didn’t need anything except a finger pointed in the right direction and maybe a few supplies. We’ll get to Mocoron. Contact the team. And then we’ll take it from there.”
“Take it where, exactly? It’s not like we know how high up the chain the mole may be. We can’t exactly walk up to everyone with a badge and politely ask if they’re raking in two separate paychecks—one from the government and one from a psychotically crazed Honduran kingpin.”
“No, but we’ll have our gut instincts. And no one can find information better than Charlie.” He slid his arms around her waist, pushing his front to her back, and tucked his chin onto her shoulder. “We knew this wasn’t going to be a cakewalk, but there’s always a link. Somewhere. Charlie’s specialty is finding it, and when the fucker makes a stupid mistake—and he or she will eventually—we’ll be there. And that much closer to finding Rachel.”
“That’s almost what Vincent told me—that people make mistakes and the key to catching them is using that to your advantage.”
Penny hadn’t realized she’d spoken aloud until Rafe’s body stilled. His lips brushed against her neck as he spoke. “Who’s Vincent?”
“A friend, my mentor at the bail enforcement agency. He’s actually a retired SEAL.”
“I’m surprised you didn’t go to him when you suspected what happened to Rachel. Even as retired old-timers, SEALs eat this kind of shit for breakfast.”
“Actually, I did. He was reaching out to his former team.”
“Then what happened?” Rafe linked his large hands just below her belly button and held her close.
“I left two days before they were scheduled to leave…because Vincent would’ve never let me tag along.”
It took a moment to interpret the shaking behind her shoulders as laughter. She turned in his embrace and punched his arm. “It’s not funny!”
“Honey, if you can strong-arm a brood of Alpha operatives, you can sure as hell get your way with a crew of geriatric SEALs.”
“Can I have my way with you?” Eyes wide, she slapped a hand to her mouth, but a string of giggles still escaped through her fingers. “I didn’t mean…oh hell. That came out way wrong.”
“I like the way it came out, and the answer is without a doubt, yes.” Rafe eased her chin up. One dropped glance to her lips and air became in short supply.
Needful heat ripped through her veins and he’d yet to touch her any more intimately than the brush of fingers sliding into her hair. He held her gaze so long she could’ve sang the national anthem. And then she saw it—the slight flicker in his eyes, the crease of his frown as his gaze dropped to her mouth and back. Something bothered him.
She palmed his cheek, tracing her thumb down the line of his frown. “What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I think you were right a few days ago. You should stay here in the village while I head to Mocoron,” he finally said. “You can rest, continue to collect your strength. And then when everything’s done and over, the team and I will come back and get you.”
That wasn’t what she expected. Her mouth dropped right before it snapped together with an audible click. One small step and she pulled herself from his embrace, uncaring of the show she was no doubt giving him in her paper-thin cotton pajama dress.
“Are you freaking kidding me? After that whole spiel about not leaving me behind you’re now suggesting that you do just that? I don’t know what kind of medicinal jungle products you’ve been smoking while we’ve been here, but it’s made you delusional. You had your chance to go at this alone and you refused, remember? Now that I’m healed, you want me to stay behind? Why?”
“For once, can’t you just do as you’re asked? I have my reasons.”
“No…because your reasons are obviously stupid ones.”
Rafe’s face reddened to the point Penny expected steam to start spewing from his nose. Instead, he growled out, “You want to know? Fine. It’s because I don’t want you anywhere near the fucking shit storm if Fuentes’s mole happens to be holed up in that base. Call me a caveman or a Neanderthal…I don’t fucking care. But I’m not willing to take that kind of risk where you’re concerned.”
She poked a finger into his chest, making him wince. “I am not a damsel in distress, Rafael Ortega. I do not need to be sheltered or coddled or protected from anything you deem unpleasant. So any thoughts you have of leaving me behind better get wiped from that hard head of yours right the hell now. If you’re going to Mocoron, so am I. This isn’t kindergarten. There are no take-backsies.”
“You could use the rest to—”
“Go crazy. Because that’s what would happen. I haven’t gotten this far to stop now. If I’m not actively doing something to find Rachel, I’ll go out of my mind. And then there’s worrying myself sick over you, you big, too-sexy oaf.”
“I’m a hardheaded, sexy oaf, am I?”
“I call it like I see it. Look, I know I screwed up. I should’ve told you I was hurt from the start, but—oh, never mind.”
Angrier at herself more than anyone, she tossed her hands up with a low growl and turned. Rafe didn’t let her go far. He grasped her at the elbow and gently whipped her back around.
Penny shook her head. “I can’t do this with you right now.”
“Look at me.” Keeping his voice soft, he caught her shaking head in his hands. “Look at me. Please.”
Oh God. She was so not ready for this talk. She made an attempt to build her own emotionless mask, but instead, her heart trembled the moment she met his gaze. The lines around his mouth relaxed, and instead of steel blue, his eyes transformed to a warm cobalt. “Can we revisit that big-sexy-oaf comment?”
“Rafe,” she sighed.
He tipped her face up, all signs of teasing erased from his face. “Yeah. You messed up by not telling me about the damn scratch. And you will not, under any circumstances, put your life in jeopardy like that again. And before you
accuse me of being a Neanderthal caveman, I’m going to admit to it. I am. When it comes to you, I may as well wear a bearskin loincloth and carry around a fucking club.”
Nerves ate at her stomach lining as she wondered where this conversation was heading.
“I care about you, Red,” Rafe admitted. “I’m not going to apologize for it, and I don’t know what the hell to do with it. But my first instinct, regardless of the fact you’ve already knocked my ass to the ground, is to protect you.”
Penny’s mouth suddenly went very, very dry. She shook her head, afraid she’d be unable to form actual words and make even more of an ass of herself than she already had.
It wasn’t a declaration of love, but it elevated her heart as well as her toes. Suddenly, there was no thinking. She felt. She slipped her hands into his hair and pulled him down to her waiting lips…and she kissed him with everything she had.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Penny was done overthinking everything, done denying herself what she needed. And she needed Rafe. Every fiber of her body ached for him. Her heart shuddered with the thought of not seeing him. Touching him became nearly as important to her as breathing.
The damage was done. She’d fallen in love with the exact type of man she’d sworn to stay away from since childhood. Whether she lost him now or watched him walk away later, both methods of losing him would be like having her heart ripped from her chest. Turning back time was the only way to ensure a different ending, and even if it were possible, she wasn’t sure she’d do it. Not if it meant never having him be a part of her life in the first place.
Their tongues pillaged and plundered, hands gripped and kneaded. Rafe trailed his palms up her torso. By the time his fingers locked into the depths of her hair, hot lava spilled through her veins.
“I want you to be damn sure about this,” Rafe growled against her neck. A soft nibble followed by a soothing flick of his tongue made her whimper.
“I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life. I know what I’m getting myself into, and I’m prepared to deal with the fallout later.” Her heart teetered on its side with the half-truth. She wasn’t so sure she’d ever be able to deal with the possibility of not having him in her life. Even the idea of it made her heart throb so hard it hurt to breathe. “Make love to me, Rafe. Right here and now.”
He pulled back and stared at her so long she thought he’d turn away. Then with renewed fervor, he brought his mouth down with a heated tenderness that buckled her knees. His lips ate at her mouth with the slow deliberateness of a man who wanted to savor every last morsel.
He reached for the hem of her nightdress. Each inch of skin he exposed brought a new eruption of goose bumps. He kissed her neck, leaving a trail of warm tingles as he traveled upward until his tongue teasingly flicked the edge of her ear. In a flash, her nightgown disappeared and Rafe walked them backward to the bed.
He was everywhere: in her head, in her body. A slow glow of need turned hot when he cupped her breasts in the palms of his hands and caressed both nipples with his thumbs. At the sound of her lusty groan, he did it again, this time giving them a gentle tug.
She was exposed to him, in more than her nakedness. It was as if he could see straight through her shivering flesh to the insecurities beneath. The questions. The doubts. The false bravado she had a nasty habit of conjuring when things got uncomfortable. Rafe didn’t let her hide. With a gentle touch, he caught the hands she automatically lifted to cover herself and linked them around his neck.
“Nuh-uh,” he admonished her with a soft kiss. “Never hide yourself from me. You’re fucking perfect.”
“Hardly,” she scoffed. “But it’s what I’ve been given.”
Rafe kissed her again, making her breathless by the time he pulled away. A mischievous smirk kicked up his mouth. “And you’re giving it to me. You have no idea how much I want it, Red. I want to toss you down on that bed and bury my cock into your body and never come out. I want to taste every last inch of you. I want to explore you. All of you.”
God, she wanted that, too. Her body was on fire for it. She rubbed her breasts against his still-covered chest and smirked at the rolling growl it pulled from his throat. “So what’s stopping you?”
“The thrill of the journey.” He kissed her down onto the bed before leaving her in its center and getting back to his feet.
There was no way to hide her awed expression as he dragged his pants down in one swift movement. He was the epitome of masculinity. The eagle tattoo on his chest flexed as he tore his shirt over his head. His erection, already thick and proud, made it no secret he was as eager for this to happen as she was.
“Like what you see, sweetheart?” He let her look her fill, and one edge of his mouth twitched into a grin. She didn’t think she’d ever get enough of him.
Her voice was lost, her mouth so dry all she could do was nod as he climbed back onto the bed. Both his hands and his mouth glided up her body. She writhed beneath him, loving the scrape of his raspy stubble.
“Jesus. I don’t want to rush this with you, baby, but I honest-to-God don’t know if I can hold back anymore,” Rafe admitted.
“Who said anything about holding back?”
“I don’t want to hurt you.” A haunted look clouded his eyes as his gaze dropped to her healing wound. He bent, softly trailing his mouth up her leg until he was inches shy of the puckered skin. “Do you have any idea how close I came to losing you a few days ago?”
“Close enough to know I don’t want to waste this chance.” At the pained look on his face, she cupped his cheek and tilted his gaze toward her. “You’re not going to hurt me. And you don’t need to hold back. I don’t want you to hold back.”
“I think you’re underestimating how much I want you.”
“So why don’t you come up here and show me?” Penny’s lips melted into a naughty grin, the smirk widening when Rafe chuckled. She loved the lightness that glittered from his eyes when he laughed. At least if she couldn’t hold onto the man, the memories were hers forever.
He kissed every inch of her in excruciating slowness: the curve of her hip, the indent of her belly. By the time he flicked her hardened nipple with the tip of his tongue, she was already three-quarters into her own blissful little world.
Penny dropped her hand to his granite-hard erection, making it jump on contact. Slow and firm, she stroked it, spreading the bead of moisture leaking from the tip down his thickening shaft. Just when she didn’t think he could get any harder, he did.
Rafe pushed himself deeper into her hand. One thrust, then two. She pumped harder and quicker, flying on a sexual high created by his low moans. The second she slipped her other hand toward his tightening balls, Rafe gently pinned both her wrists above her head.
“Fuck, baby.” He panted breathlessly. Wide and dilated with arousal, his blue eyes looked nearly black in the dim light. “Those hands should be registered as lethal weapons.”
“You never know what other kind of weapons might be hanging around. Maybe you should frisk me.”
* * *
Penny’s provocative words did nothing to hide the unguarded swell of emotions hovering in her green eyes. Rafe knew the same emotions stirred in his. Sure, lust burned through his body, turned his kisses a bit harder and his touches more brazen. He needed to feel her wrapped around his cock as much as he needed his next fucking breath. But it was his need for her, for her concerned gazes and loving caresses, that sent him on a ride like no other.
Never once had he needed a woman so bad. She was beautiful inside and out, her insecurities making her as desirable as did her stubborn, Jack Russell determination. To have witnessed both made him one lucky bastard. She was a complication in its truest form—and he didn’t give a hundred fucks.
His “The less complicated, the better” motto had smacked into a five-foot-two-inch redheaded roadblock and shattered on impact. It hadn’t sent him running in the other direction. He wasn’t deterred. He’d dug in his
heels and started thinking the kind of what-ifs he had no fucking business thinking.
For the first time in his life, Rafe hadn’t been scared out of his mind at the thought of spending the rest of his life with a woman.
No, with Penny.
It took seeing her pale and weak, watching her fight demons in her dreams from which he couldn’t save her, to realize he had so much more to lose than he ever thought.
“Rafe. Please.” Her whispered moan ripped him from his thoughts and straight into her eyes. With a groan, she canted her hips toward his hand.
He nearly slid into her body right then but knew the second he did, he’d be a goner. The selfish bastard in him wanted the sight of her coming carved into his retinas.
With his cock heavy and hard between his legs, Rafe focused on Penny. He slipped his fingers through her drenched folds and swallowed her soft gasp with his mouth. Careful to avoid the sensitive nub of her clit, he mapped out the area with touch alone. The lift of her hips and her hot, breathy moans encouraged him to slip one finger into her tight sheath, then two.
She squirmed beneath him, fingers digging into his shoulders as he caught one nipple tightly between his lips and fucked her with his hand.
He curled his fingers into her body, groaning when he felt her flex around him. “I need to taste you so goddamned bad.”
“God yes.” Her breath hitched as she opened her legs to admit his wide shoulders. Eyes hooded in arousal, she watched him settle between her thighs. Spread before him, open and unguarded, she offered herself to him with no reservations. No barriers. He didn’t take his eyes off her as his tongue took its first slow swipe.
Her taste exploded on his tongue. He couldn’t get enough. The wet walls of her body tightened around his fingers with each lick. He didn’t relent, keeping it up until her body arched into him and her whispered plea reached his ears.
He needed to hear her come.
With a twist and push, he pumped his fingers in and out of her pussy. He licked, flicked, dragged the tip of his tongue to her clit. The hands in his hair tightened, holding him close. He didn’t need the help or the encouragement, but the smarting tugs made him ache to be inside her even more.