****
Later that evening, back in our room, Lyncoln and I are both in good moods. We had a fun day with friends and family, had dinner, and played card games after the paintballing. The day’s events in combination with the Hadenfelt lead have us feeling eager and upbeat. Tomorrow will be a hectic day though, full of taking the questions emailed in from all over. And then there is the cabinet thing to worry about too. And the Hadenfelt stuff. Eeesh.
As soon as we are finally alone, Lyncoln is all over me, kissing me hungrily just like he was during the paintball match. I again wonder if this is it, if this is the time we will finally take this further, or if, yet again, he will tell me to wait a little longer until I’m ready. If he wasn’t so convincing with his kissing, I would wonder if it was him that wasn’t ready to do this with me. I mean, we are already married for Pete’s sake!
“Lync,” I whisper as we are lying on the bed with him over me, but to the side with his weight propped up on one of his elbows so he doesn’t crush me. I don’t say anything more but just look at him, questioning if this will be it.
He closes his eyes and sighs a moment, knowing what I’m asking. “One more day. One more day, Reagan. Just let them figure out this Hadenfelt lead, and whether he is caught or not, tomorrow we can try if you still want to.”
“Why does that have anything to do with this?” I ask confused and can’t help but feel a little rejected.
He has said time after time he wants to wait for me. Well, I am a married woman and I am done waiting! All that smooching earlier has my hormones all fired up and I actually want to do this. I don’t think I’ll regret it either. This day has been one of my favorite days ever. This would be a great way to end it. So what’s his deal now?
“Because whether either of us wants to admit it or not, the last thing that goes through our minds when our heads are on our pillows is where that man is and what he is up to,” he explains. “I just wanted to wait until things were less stressful. And you can call me egotistical, but I want to be the only man on your mind after such activities.”
I get what he’s saying, but still…
I drop my eyes and feel a little rejected. There is never going to be a perfect time. Doesn’t he get that? What if Hadenfelt is never found? And we are in the middle of a war here. “Less stressful” may take a good, long while.
He brings my chin up to look at him, his eyes searching mine. “What’s wrong?”
“I just feel a little rejected is all,” I offer honestly. “It’s okay.”
“What?!” he sits up and pulls back, looking at me like I am straight-up crazy.
I sigh. “Look. We are married. We did this right. We obviously want one another on this next level. Sure, I’m not ready in the sense that I know what I’m doing, but I am ready in the sense that I know I want to do it with you.”
I realize at this point I’m rambling, but I couldn’t stop even if I wanted to. “And now you just keep telling me to wait a little longer. I feel like there will never be a perfect time. Not now. Not if we win, and definitely not if we lose. I married you knowing that I wanted this with you eventually. And I thought the eventually wouldn’t be that terribly long either. If I didn’t know better, it’s you who isn’t ready…” Tears sting my eyes, so I pause before touching his cheek and adding, “You are the only man on my mind when I fall asleep. I just think of Hadenfelt because I am worried about you. It all always comes back to you.”
He kisses me, soft and gentle, before pulling back. “Okay.”
“Okay?” I ask confused about what he’s okaying.
“I love you, Reagan Reed,” he whispers, his lips now hovering over mine.
“And I love you, Lyncoln Reed,” I whisper back.
“Your wish is my command, Regs. Lord knows I want it too.” He smiles a sly grin, his blue-brown eyes up to no good.
Uh-oh. Predator Lyncoln is back. I think I may have finally just released the caged animal.
This is happening!
This is happening?
This is happening!
As usual, our bodies go crashing into one another. And the wait ended up being more than worth it.
Chapter 33
The next morning, I wake up blushing as I remember the night’s events.
Wow. I mean, wow. Who knew desire could be such a powerful and heady thing? I shiver and blush just thinking about it. It turns out, there was nothing really awkward about it.
As I roll over, I automatically reach for the sheet. Our limbs are intertwined as I lay over Lyncoln, but I still feel the need for some more coverage of some sort.
He grins, and I wonder how long he has been lying there awake. “I don’t mind, gorgeous.” He rubs his fingertips along my bare back.
I smile, feel myself blush, and pull the sheet up to my shoulders anyway. I want to pull the whole thing over my head and hide until he goes to get in the shower, but I settle for tucking it in around my armpits.
“How do you feel?” he asks, looking me over concerned.
“Ummm. I’m not sure. Well educated? Like I’ll be blushing all day?” I admit while I play with the sheet and blush even deeper.
This makes Lyncoln laugh. “Remind me to further your education later.”
“There can’t possibly be that much more to know,” I say smiling. We were up entirely too late, and it was entirely worth it too. Who knew?
He nods with a smirk. “Oh, but there is.”
Greedy. I shake my head with a laugh. “And how do you feel?” I blush and look down embarrassed as I finish asking him this question. I hadn’t ever done any of that before, but I still know it was great. With his past, I wonder if he thinks it was too. I have to know it went as good as I think it did.
“About last night, you mean?” he grins and winks at me, enjoying torturing me. “I think we will definitely have to repeat the experience.”
“So good then?” Clutching the sheets, I sit up, looking him straight in the eyes despite feeling the heat of a serious blush on my cheeks. One that may take days to disappear.
“Not good.” He keeps grinning as he lazily trails his fingers along my bare back with one hand and has another hand tucked behind his head. “I would categorize it as fan-freaking-tastic.”
I giggle awkwardly. “Just making sure we are on the same page.”
He sits up with me and puts his fingers under my chin to look at him again and kisses me gently. “It was amazing. You’re amazing. And if it’s up to me, we will be repeating last night every night for the rest of our lives. I told you you had nothing to worry about, and you definitely did not.”
At that, I cannot stop smiling. Or giggling. Which is super awkward. But why did I think this would be such a big deal? It turns out if you do it right, it ends up being just a physical way of showing your love and respect for the other person. And having now experienced how it’s supposed to be, I can’t imagine doing that as freely as other people do. Maybe that’s what Lyncoln meant about it not being “just sex” with us.
We spend the next few hours eating breakfast and getting ready together. When Gertie comes in, I know I am as red in the face as ever, but she leaves it alone and busies herself with the usual chores, not noticing that every time Lyncoln touches me or even looks at me, I blush all over again.
To make matters worse, it feels weird getting completely dressed up and ready to go in formal wear in the morning instead of the evening for an interview. After Lyncoln leaves, and while Gertie curls my hair, Frank and I go over wedding dress plans for the real wedding… or the televised one anyway, should we win.
We have decided to do two different dresses. For the wedding ceremony, I will be wearing something a little more modern but just as beautiful. Then for the inauguration, I will be wearing a traditional wedding gown complete with a train. I’m quite pleased with the pictures he has to show me. The dresses have come a long way from his original sketches. The details he has put into both make me certain, without a doubt, that n
o one knows me better and could design a dress for me better than Frank can. I wonder how many people he has working on them, and what would happen to the dresses should we not win.
Well that’s depressing.
I step into my elegant dress for today, an off-the-shoulder navy mermaid style dress that is fairly tight fitting until well past my hips where it swoops and flares outward. My hair is half up. I am wearing a simple diamond necklace and matching earrings. I look feminine yet professional. My back is covered. I don’t have a leg slit. Frank is all business with this dress choice and I’m glad. It kind of sets the mood for what we are about to do. One more interview and then we are on to the final vote. There’s no messing around today.
While Frank does finishing touches on my makeup, Gertie is kind enough to read me sample questions from Elle. I have been over them a hundred times, but it helps me to focus and I appreciate my attendants always going above and beyond in their care for me.
Lyncoln, of course, is with Langly in the meeting room in the Presidential Suite for all this and is getting specifics and speaking with West and Becker before they leave for the Hadenfelt tip. He shows up with twenty-five minutes to spare, grabs a quick shower, and dresses in his navy suit, white dress shirt, navy textured vest, and navy tie. He looks amazing, per the usual.
Gertie and Frank finish up and leave to meet us downstairs. We will have a break during the questions and they will be there with refreshments and goodies and, of course, to fix any wardrobe or hair issues.
“You know I like blue on you,” Lyncoln offers with a wink.
I smile. “Only because of that first time when I blabbed to you why I was wearing navy,” I say, staring into the blue portion of his eyes.
“That may be true.” He shrugs, slowly walking over to me. “Are you ready to do this?”
I sigh. “Yes. As long as we don’t snoodle right now. I just got my hormones under control and am somewhat focused. If you start touching me right now, Lord knows what I will say down there.”
He laughs, a little too hard. “I’m fine with that as long as I can reserve the opportunity to do so later.” He takes my palm and kisses it.
I shake my head. “Will you ever have enough?”
“Of you?” He looks surprised by my question as I nod. “No. Never. Definitely not after last night either. It’s probably worse now, actually.”
I glare at him, purposefully squinting a bit. “You’re doing it.”
“What?”
“Making my hormones funny,” I poke him in the chest, “Stop. It.”
He laughs, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek and I can’t help but think I have rarely seen him this happy. “Alright, Mrs. Reed. Let’s go win this election. I’ll try my best to leave your hormones alone until later. Tonight though, no promises.”
****
The questions are on every topic known to man. From, “What is your favorite food?” to “Where do you stand on working allowances?” we answer question after question after question. Some are on the upcoming wedding and I smile ear to ear knowing Dougall, Elle, Lyncoln and I were already at my super-secret wedding. Lyncoln, of course, is a rock under pressure.
An hour in, we get to some tough questions on implementing our project idea. A while after that, Langly interrupts to speak with Lyncoln, who returns to tell me they’re prepping the teams at DIA and we will be updated as soon as they leave. They are shooting for late afternoon departure. Arrival time of 1700 hours.
We sit and answer more questions. Some are more difficult and on topics I don’t really know as well, which we are honest and point out that we don’t know enough to make an informed decision but look forward to learning enough about it to do so. I’m glad we are honest in those situations instead of trying to make it sound like we know more than we do and making fools of ourselves.
We get a question, I’m sure from Omaha, about how being from a different township will benefit me as a leader. Since both Marisol and Henry are from Denver, I’m thankful for whoever it was who pointed out that I’m the only one remaining in the Culling not from here. I feel pretty confident in my answer and even get a little teary eyed explaining all that Omaha life has taught me. I think I rocked that one.
After a quick break for refreshments, we go a full hour more. As it nears lunchtime, and just when I think if I hear another question I will projectile vomit all over Dougall, we finally get to the last question.
“Each of you explain what the Culling has been like for you and how it will better you for office.”
Great. Like that isn’t a loaded question.
I nod to Lyncoln to go first and he smirks at me, knowing I need time.
“The Culling just was not what I expected,” he begins honestly. “I didn’t expect to be selected, I didn’t expect to make it this far, and I surely didn’t think finding the love of my life was ever going to happen. I thought that would be the last thing to happen, actually.” He pauses to wink at me. “When the Culling began, I honestly didn’t know if I was a right fit for the presidency. The Culling pushes you and stretches you to do things you never thought you could. It’s far from easy, but it showed me that I’m capable of being President and that motivates me daily to constantly try to be a better man and a better future President. So, I guess with the Culling, I’m learning to expect the unexpected. I’m the type of person that will never settle and never do anything halfway. The things I have learned throughout this process, with this wonderful woman at my side in combination with my military background, will help me be not only a better President, but a better person. I will never forget the Culling, the good and the bad. I will carry both with me and use both to help mold me into a better President.”
Wow. He really pulled that out of his butt. But… it works! How do I follow that up?
Here goes nothing.
“When I think of the Culling, I think of about a hundred different things. It hasn’t been at all what I thought it would be like. It has been some of the best times of my life, and honestly, some of the worst times of my life. There have been real feeling tests that were fake, and tests you wanted to be fake that were real. Above all, I will cherish the memories with the wonderful people I have come to know and love the most. I met 49 other girls coming into this thing. Many of them I now consider not just friends, but family. I also met 22 boys, one of which I am proud to call my husband… I mean I will soon be calling him husband. But, we also can’t forget that we lost one of us on this journey,” I pause feeling tears prick my eyes. Lyncoln reaches my hand up to kiss the knuckles above my ring.
I continue, “Oliver is gone but not at all forgotten. The people, the people in the Culling that I met, and also the people of this great country that I was able to visit and meet with, are what motivates me. I am honored and humbled to be chosen to sit here today… whether we win or not. The Culling taught me numerous life lessons. I have been tested and worked harder than I thought humanly possible. I have learned more than I thought humanly possible. I have laughed. I have loved. And I have grieved.
“The Culling has changed me by stretching me to my fullest capacity. And I’m ready, if you’ll have me. I’m ready to go to work alongside the people of this great country. I’m ready to laugh and love with the people of my country. And when life throws us curveballs, I’ll grieve with my country too. I’m ready to face challenges head-on and do what needs to be done. The Culling helped prepare and mold me. My friends and family forever motivate me. And the man sitting here beside me is the one I want by my side as we go hand in hand into the greatest honor and challenge of this great country.
“I want to close by saying that at some point, one or both of us may disappoint you. I’m sure we will make mistakes. We have been thoroughly tested, but we are human and not at all perfect. Know though, that we will do everything in our power to make it right. There isn’t a thing we wouldn’t do to protect our country. Thank you for getting us this far.” As an afterthought and just to please Dougall, I add
, “And hurry up and vote because I want to get married!”
Lyncoln gives me a look and winks at me as if promising he will wreak havoc on my hormones later.
Dougall and Lyncoln both laugh, Dougall looking pleased. She gestures to the cameraman and we are finally done.
“That was genius, Ms. Scott,” Dougall nods. “The part about Oliver outstanding.”
I look at her slightly offended. “I meant every word of it. Don’t think for a second I would use him as leverage for more votes.”
She puts her hands up in surrender. “Yes, dear. I know, I know. I just meant that you keep honoring him in the most beautiful ways.”
“Oh,” I say appeased.
Marisol and Henry have arrived at that moment, ready for their portion of the interview, and Dougall dismisses us. Unfortunately, Marisol looks absolutely beautiful in her red dress. As they stand with her arm in Henry’s, I see Henry look less tense and more relaxed with her. Maybe there’s hope for them yet, should they get married. We briefly wish them luck and then head to lunch. Which is good because I’m starving!
Win or lose, we just finished our last interview. And now we wait for Thursday. Will Thursday find me the new Madam President? Or figuring out a whole new life outside of the presidency?
Only time will tell. So much can happen in just a few days.
****
Mom, Dad, and Ashton join us for lunch. Afterwards, we meet with Mr. Lowis for just an hour to set up a schedule for the next few days. We are meeting with some people of his tomorrow, and a few current cabinet members on Wednesday.
It feels like Thursday is forever away. I would rather keep busy than just sitting around thinking about it, so I am not at all bothered by a busy schedule. It’s strange to think though that in a little over three days, the Culling will be over.
What will life be like post-Culling? All I have wanted for so long is to win this thing, so it’s strange for me to even consider what may happen if we don’t. What would we even do? Would Marisol and Henry want us in their cabinet? The thought gives me the heebie-jeebies.
The Fracturing: Book 2 (The Culling Series) Page 49