“I care for you a great deal, Mother dear,” he whispered at last, “and I’m glad you’ve come back; but are you sure Aunty Rosa told you everything?”
“Everything. What does it matter? But — — ” the voice broke with a sob that was also laughter — ”Punch, my poor, dear, half-blind darling, don’t you think it was a little foolish of you?”
“No. It saved a lickin’.”
Mamma shuddered and slipped away in the darkness to write a long letter to Papa. Here is an extract:
“... Judy is a dear, plump little prig who adores the woman, and wears with as much gravity as her religious opinions — only eight, Jack! — a venerable horsehair atrocity which she calls her Bustle. I have just burned it, and the child is asleep in my bed as I write. She will come to me at once. Punch I cannot quite understand. He is well nourished, but seems to have been worried into a system of small deceptions which the woman magnifies into deadly sins. Don’t you recollect our own up-bringing, dear, when the Fear of the Lord was so often the beginning of falsehood? I shall win Punch to me before long. I am taking the children away into the country to get them to know me, and, on the whole, I am content, or shall be when you come home, dear boy, and then, thank God, we shall be all under one roof again at last!”
* * * * *
Three months later, Punch, no longer Black Sheep, has discovered that he is the veritable owner of a real, live, lovely Mamma, who is also a sister, comforter, and friend, and that he must protect her till the Father comes home. Deception does not suit the part of a protector, and, when one can do anything without question, where is the use of deception?
“Mother would be awfully cross if you walked through that ditch,” says Judy, continuing a conversation.
“Mother’s never angry,” says Punch. “She’d just say, ‘You’re a little pagal’; and that’s not nice, but I’ll show.”
Punch walks through the ditch and mires himself to the knees. “Mother, dear,” he shouts, “I’m just as dirty as I can pos-sib-ly be!”
“Then change your clothes as quickly as you pos-sib-ly can!” rings out Mother’s clear voice from the house. “And don’t be a little pagal!”
“There! Told you so,” says Punch. “It’s all different now, and we are just as much Mother’s as if she had never gone.”
Not altogether, O Punch, for when young lips have drunk deep of the bitter waters of Hate, Suspicion, and Despair, all the Love in the world will not wholly take away that knowledge; though it may turn darkened eyes for a while to the light, and teach Faith where no Faith was.
HIS MAJESTY THE KING
“Where the word of a King is, there is power: And who may say unto him — What doest thou?”
“Yeth! And Chimo to sleep at ve foot of ve bed, and ve pink pikky-book, and ve bwead — ’cause I will be hungwy in ve night — and vat’s all, Miss Biddums. And now give me one kiss and I’ll go to sleep. — So! Kite quiet. Ow! Ve pink pikky-book has slidded under ve pillow and ve bwead is cwumbling! Miss Biddums! Miss Biddums! I’m so uncomfy! Come and tuck me up, Miss Biddums.”
His Majesty the King was going to bed; and poor, patient Miss Biddums, who had advertised herself humbly as a “young person, European, accustomed to the care of little children,” was forced to wait upon his royal caprices. The going to bed was always a lengthy process, because His Majesty had a convenient knack of forgetting which of his many friends, from the mehter’s son to the Commissioner’s daughter, he had prayed for, and, lest the Deity should take offence, was used to toil through his little prayers, in all reverence, five times in one evening. His Majesty the King believed in the efficacy of prayer as devoutly as he believed in Chimo the patient spaniel, or Miss Biddums, who could reach him down his gun — ”with cursuffun caps — reel ones” — from the upper shelves of the big nursery cupboard.
At the door of the nursery his authority stopped. Beyond lay the empire of his father and mother — two very terrible people who had no time to waste upon His Majesty the King. His voice was lowered when he passed the frontier of his own dominions, his actions were fettered, and his soul was filled with awe because of the grim man who lived among a wilderness of pigeon-holes and the most fascinating pieces of red tape, and the wonderful woman who was always getting into or stepping out of the big carriage.
To the one belonged the mysteries of the “duftar-room”; to the other the great, reflected wilderness of the “Memsahib’s room” where the shiny, scented dresses hung on pegs, miles and miles up in the air, and the just-seen plateau of the toilet-table revealed an acreage of speckly combs, broidered “hanafitch bags,” and “white-headed” brushes.
There was no room for His Majesty the King either in official reserve or mundane gorgeousness. He had discovered that, ages and ages ago — before even Chimo came to the house, or Miss Biddums had ceased grizzling over a packet of greasy letters which appeared to be her chief treasure on earth. His Majesty the King, therefore, wisely confined himself to his own territories, where only Miss Biddums, and she feebly, disputed his sway.
From Miss Biddums he had picked up his simple theology and welded it to the legends of gods and devils that he had learned in the servants’ quarters.
To Miss Biddums he confided with equal trust his tattered garments and his more serious griefs. She would make everything whole. She knew exactly how the Earth had been born, and had reassured the trembling soul of His Majesty the King that terrible time in July when it rained continuously for seven days and seven nights, and — there was no Ark ready and all the ravens had flown away! She was the most powerful person with whom he was brought into contact — always excepting the two remote and silent people beyond the nursery door.
How was His Majesty the King to know that, six years ago, in the summer of his birth, Mrs. Austell, turning over her husband’s papers, had come upon the intemperate letter of a foolish woman who had been carried away by the silent man’s strength and personal beauty? How could he tell what evil the overlooked slip of note-paper had wrought in the mind of a desperately jealous wife? How could he, despite his wisdom, guess that his mother had chosen to make of it excuse for a bar and a division between herself and her husband, that strengthened and grew harder to break with each year; that she, having unearthed this skeleton in the cupboard, had trained it into a household God which should be about their path and about their bed, and poison all their ways?
These things were beyond the province of His Majesty the King. He only knew that his father was daily absorbed in some mysterious work for a thing called the Sirkar and that his mother was the victim alternately of the Nautch and the Burrakhana. To these entertainments she was escorted by a Captain-Man for whom His Majesty the King had no regard.
“He doesn’t laugh,” he argued with Miss Biddums, who would fain have taught him charity. “He only makes faces wiv his mouf, and when he wants to o-muse me I am not o-mused.” And His Majesty the King shook his head as one who knew the deceitfulness of this world.
Morning and evening it was his duty to salute his father and mother — the former with a grave shake of the hand, and the latter with an equally grave kiss. Once, indeed, he had put his arms round his mother’s neck, in the fashion he used toward Miss Biddums. The openwork of his sleeve-edge caught in an earring, and the last stage of His Majesty’s little overture was a suppressed scream and summary dismissal to the nursery.
“It’s w’ong,” thought His Majesty the King, “to hug Memsahibs wiv fings in veir ears. I will amember.” He never repeated the experiment.
Miss Biddums, it must be confessed, spoiled him as much as his nature admitted, in some sort of recompense for what she called “the hard ways of his Papa and Mamma.” She, like her charge, knew nothing of the trouble between man and wife — the savage contempt for a woman’s stupidity on the one side, or the dull, rankling anger on the other. Miss Biddums had looked after many little children in her time, and served in many establishments. Being a discreet woman, she observed little and sai
d less, and, when her pupils went over the sea to the Great Unknown which she, with touching confidence in her hearers, called “Home,” packed up her slender belongings and sought for employment afresh, lavishing all her love on each successive batch of ingrates. Only His Majesty the King had repaid her affection with interest; and in his uncomprehending ears she had told the tale of nearly all her hopes, her aspirations, the hopes that were dead, and the dazzling glories of her ancestral home in “Calcutta, close to Wellington Square.”
Everything above the average was in the eyes of His Majesty the King “Calcutta good.” When Miss Biddums had crossed his royal will, he reversed the epithet to vex that estimable lady, and all things evil were, until the tears of repentance swept away spite, “Calcutta bad.”
Now and again Miss Biddums begged for him the rare pleasure of a day in the society of the Commissioner’s child — the wilful four-year-old Patsie, who, to the intense amazement of His Majesty the King, was idolized by her parents. On thinking the question out at length, by roads unknown to those who have left childhood behind, he came to the conclusion that Patsie was petted because she wore a big blue sash and yellow hair.
This precious discovery he kept to himself. The yellow hair was absolutely beyond his power, his own tousled wig being potato-brown; but something might be done toward the blue sash. He tied a large knot in his mosquito-curtains in order to remember to consult Patsie on their next meeting. She was the only child he had ever spoken to, and almost the only one that he had ever seen. The little memory and the very large and ragged knot held good.
“Patsie, lend me your blue wiband,” said His Majesty the King.
“You’ll bewy it,” said Patsie, doubtfully, mindful of certain fearful atrocities committed on her doll.
“No, I won’t — twoofanhonor. It’s for me to wear.”
“Pooh!” said Patsie. “Boys don’t wear sa-ashes. Zey’s only for dirls.”
“I didn’t know.” The face of His Majesty the King fell.
“Who wants ribands? Are you playing horses, chickabiddies?” said the Commissioner’s wife, stepping into the veranda.
“Toby wanted my sash,” explained Patsie.
“I don’t now,” said His Majesty the King, hastily, feeling that with one of these terrible “grown-ups” his poor little secret would be shamelessly wrenched from him, and perhaps — most burning desecration of all — laughed at.
“I’ll give you a cracker-cap,” said the Commissioner’s wife. “Come along with me, Toby, and we’ll choose it.”
The cracker-cap was a stiff, three-pointed vermilion-and-tinsel splendor. His Majesty the King fitted it on his royal brow. The Commissioner’s wife had a face that children instinctively trusted, and her action, as she adjusted the toppling middle spike, was tender.
“Will it do as well?” stammered His Majesty the King.
“As what, little one?”
“As ve wiban?”
“Oh, quite. Go and look at yourself in the glass.”
The words were spoken in all sincerity and to help forward any absurd “dressing-up” amusement that the children might take into their minds. But the young savage has a keen sense of the ludicrous. His Majesty the King swung the great cheval-glass down, and saw his head crowned with the staring horror of a fool’s cap — a thing which his father would rend to pieces if it ever came into his office. He plucked it off, and burst into tears.
“Toby,” said the Commissioner’s wife, gravely, “you shouldn’t give way to temper. I am very sorry to see it. It’s wrong.”
His Majesty the King sobbed inconsolably, and the heart of Patsie’s mother was touched. She drew the child on to her knee. Clearly it was not temper alone.
“What is it, Toby? Won’t you tell me? Aren’t you well?”
The torrent of sobs and speech met, and fought for a time, with chokings and gulpings and gasps. Then, in a sudden rush, His Majesty the King was delivered of a few inarticulate sounds, followed by the words: — ”Go a — way you — dirty — little debbil!”
“Toby! What do you mean?”
“It’s what he’d say. I know it is! He said vat when vere was only a little, little eggy mess, on my t-t-unic; and he’d say it again, and laugh, if I went in wif vat on my head.”
“Who would say that?”
“M-m-my Papa! And I fought if I had ve blue wiban, he’d let me play in ve waste-paper basket under ve table.”
“What blue riband, childie?”
“Ve same vat Patsie had — ve big blue wiban w-w-wound my t-ttummy!”
“What is it, Toby? There’s something on your mind. Tell me all about it, and perhaps I can help.”
“Isn’t anyfing,” sniffed His Majesty, mindful of his manhood, and raising his head from the motherly bosom upon which it was resting. “I only fought vat you — you petted Patsie ‘cause she had ve blue wiban, and — and if I’d had ve blue wiban too, m-my Papa w-would pet me.”
The secret was out, and His Majesty the King sobbed bitterly in spite of the arms round him, and the murmur of comfort on his heated little forehead.
Enter Patsie tumultuously, embarrassed by several lengths of the Commissioner’s pet mahseer-rod. “Tum along, Toby! Zere’s a chu-chu lizard in ze chick, and I’ve told Chimo to watch him till we turn. If we poke him wiz zis his tail will go wiggle-wiggle and fall off. Tum along! I can’t weach.”
“I’m comin’,” said His Majesty the King, climbing down from the Commissioner’s wife’s knee after a hasty kiss.
Two minutes later, the chu-chu lizard’s tail was wriggling on the matting of the veranda, and the children were gravely poking it with splinters from the chick, to urge its exhausted vitality into “just one wiggle more, ‘cause it doesn’t hurt chu-chu.”
The Commissioner’s wife stood in the doorway and watched: — ”Poor little mite! A blue sash ... and my own precious Patsie! I wonder if the best of us, or we who love them best, ever understand what goes on in their topsy-turvy little heads.”
A big tear splashed on the Commissioner’s wife’s wedding-ring, and she went indoors to devise a tea for the benefit of His Majesty the King.
“Their souls aren’t in their tummies at that age in this climate,” said the Commissioner’s wife, “but they are not far off. I wonder if I could make Mrs. Austell understand. Poor little fellow!”
With simple craft, the Commissioner’s wife called on Mrs. Austell and spoke long and lovingly about children; inquiring specially for His Majesty the King.
“He’s with his governess,” said Mrs. Austell, and the tone intimated that she was not interested.
The Commissioner’s wife, unskilled in the art of war, continued her questionings. “I don’t know,” said Mrs. Austell. “These things are left to Miss Biddums, and, of course, she does not ill-treat the child.”
The Commissioner’s wife left hastily. The last sentence jarred upon her nerves. “Doesn’t ill-treat the child! As if that were all! I wonder what Tom would say if I only ‘didn’t ill-treat’ Patsie!”
Thenceforward, His Majesty the King was an honored guest at the Commissioner’s house, and the chosen friend of Patsie, with whom he blundered into as many scrapes as the compound and the servants’ quarters afforded. Patsie’s Mamma was always ready to give counsel, help, and sympathy, and, if need were and callers few, to enter into their games with an abandon that would have shocked the sleek-haired subalterns who squirmed painfully in their chairs when they came to call on her whom they profanely nicknamed “Mother Bunch.”
Yet, in spite of Patsie and Patsie’s Mamma, and the love that these two lavished upon him, His Majesty the King fell grievously from grace, and committed no less a sin than that of theft — unknown, it is true, but burdensome.
There came a man to the door one day, when His Majesty was playing in the hall and the bearer had gone to dinner, with a packet for his Majesty’s Mamma. And he put it upon the hall-table, said that there was no answer, and departed.
Presently, the p
attern of the dado ceased to interest His Majesty, while the packet, a white, neatly wrapped one of fascinating shape, interested him very much indeed. His Mamma was out, so was Miss Biddums, and there was pink string round the packet. He greatly desired pink string. It would help him in many of his little businesses — the haulage across the floor of his small cane-chair, the torturing of Chimo, who could never understand harness — and so forth. If he took the string it would be his own, and nobody would be any the wiser. He certainly could not pluck up sufficient courage to ask Mamma for it. Wherefore, mounting upon a chair, he carefully untied the string and, behold, the stiff white paper spread out in four directions, and revealed a beautiful little leather box with gold lines upon it! He tried to replace the string, but that was a failure. So he opened the box to get full satisfaction for his iniquity, and saw a most beautiful Star that shone and winked, and was altogether lovely and desirable.
“Vat,” said His Majesty, meditatively, “is a ‘parkle cwown, like what I will wear when I go to heaven. I will wear it on my head — Miss Biddums says so. I would like to wear it now. I would like to play wiv it. I will take it away and play wiv it, very careful, until Mamma asks for it. I fink it was bought for me to play wiv — same as my cart.”
His Majesty the King was arguing against his conscience, and he knew it, for he thought immediately after: “Never mind. I will keep it to play wiv until Mamma says where is it, and then I will say: — ’I tookt it and I am sorry.’ I will not hurt it because it is a ‘parkle cwown. But Miss Biddums will tell me to put it back. I will not show it to Miss Biddums.”
If Mamma had come in at that moment all would have gone well. She did not, and His Majesty the King stuffed paper, case, and jewel into the breast of his blouse and marched to the nursery.
“When Mamma asks I will tell,” was the salve that he laid upon his conscience. But Mamma never asked, and for three whole days His Majesty the King gloated over his treasure. It was of no earthly use to him, but it was splendid, and, for aught he knew, something dropped from the heavens themselves. Still Mamma made no inquiries, and it seemed to him, in his furtive peeps, as though the shiny stones grew dim. What was the use of a ‘parkle cwown if it made a little boy feel all bad in his inside? He had the pink string as well as the other treasure, but greatly he wished that he had not gone beyond the string. It was his first experience of iniquity, and it pained him after the flush of possession and secret delight in the “‘parkle cwown” had died away.
Complete Works of Rudyard Kipling (Illustrated) Page 201