The Truth Behind The Lies

by Lace, Lolah

“You looking for food?”

  “Yeah I’m starving.” I wasn’t but it sounds good, conversation wise.

  “Isabelle made lunch. It’s wrapped up in the fridge.” I made my way to the refrigerator and opened the double doors.

  “I run into you more than my father. I guess that means you’re a keeper.”

  “Bash went to the gym.” I decided to ignore his snarky comment. Hell yeah I’m a keeper. I grabbed one of the plastic containers from the fridge.

  “Only microwave it for three minutes. Anything more than that is too long.”

  “Okay thanks. I got a chance to listen to your C.D.”

  “You did?” His eyes lit up. “What did you think?”

  “I liked it. It was different of course but good. I liked tracks one and three the best and the Bowie cover you did. I liked that one too.”

  “Cool.” He smiled. I had made his day.

  I removed the lid from the container and put it in the microwave. I set the microwave to three minutes. If I couldn’t get any information from Bash I might as well try to get some from his doppelgänger.

  “Did you always live with your father?”

  “Yeah, where else would I live?”

  “Some kids stay with their mom.”

  Jax’s flawless face fashioned into a slight grin. “That would have been impossible.”

  “Why?” I was being nosey. I wanted the info on the mysterious Caroline. I needed to know what I was up against. Bash had some unresolved feelings where she was concerned. “Sometimes kids go stay with their mom after the divorce.”

  “The divorce?” Jax grinned and let out a chuckle. “Staying with my mother has never been an option.”

  Damn! Was she a bitch? Her own son didn’t want to live with her. I couldn’t help myself. I had more prying to do. “Does she ever call or visit?”

  “Does she ever call?” He was smirking and I couldn’t understand what was so funny. I was getting annoyed but I wouldn’t let him see it.

  “Yeah, does she ever stop by to visit?” Let’s put this on repeat for Jax Vandervol, the person with the hearing deficit.

  “If I ever tell you my mother stopped by to visit, you need to send me back to rehab ASAP.” He chuckled again. “You’re pretty damn funny.” He left me in the kitchen alone looking confused and stupid.

  What was that about?

  ***

  Bash wasn’t out of the house for very long. He came home and asked me if I wanted to go out for dinner. I preferred we stay in and order pizza. I ordered the pizza and we both went to pick it up. We sat in front of the television and ate. We watched one of Angelina Jolie’s movies. Just as the credits started to roll Bash grabbed the remote control and turned the TV off.

  “I have something to tell you.” His body turned to me on the couch that we shared. He was wearing a very somber expression.

  “Okay tell me.” I tried to sound unstirred. Everything about Bash stimulated the shit out of me.

  His face grew pained. “I, I lied to you.”

  My teeth clenched tight and I grinded them together in my mouth. He was going to confess he knew what he said in German that night. If looks had bullets and triggers? Man-o-man. Why am I getting so mad?

  “Sebastian, what did you lie about?”

  “I told you I was divorced.”

  “Yeah you did.” I could barely give him a chance to get the confession out. I stood and moved away from the couch and over to the fireplace. He stood too but he didn’t follow me.

  “Bash you told me you were divorced.” Were. Past tense.

  “That’s not true.”

  Okay. Okay. Okay. What the fuck? Motherfuck! What the fuck? Goddamn! “You are not divorced?”

  “No.”

  “But you are getting a divorce because you are separated?” I was trying to feed him the words I wanted to hear. I was trying to feed him lines like I was hiding behind the curtain in my own stage-play.

  “No.”

  This motherfucker better stop saying no and start telling me something I want to hear.

  “Are you breaking up with me and I don’t know it?”

  “Of course not. I love you.”

  Did he just say he loves me? Seriously? Right now. You love me. I took in a breath as he rushed over to me. He was close and I watched his eyes as he thought about touching me. I have to consciously ignore the I Love You part so I can think clearly.

  “You are not getting a divorce?”

  “Okay wait.” Bash ran his hands through his hair before they came to rest at his waist. This long dramatic pause was going to make me kick him in his damn kneecaps. “My wife disappeared.”

  “What?”

  “Ten years ago. My wife left the house and she never came home.”

  “She ran away from home?” What the fuck was he talking about? Who would ran away from all this. Who the hell would run away from Bash? I was sitting up here ready to be his mistress. I thought about it when he said he was still married. I’m not proud of it but damn it’s Bash. I’m locked in. He’s like the mob. I can’t get out now.

  “No not exactly, I really don’t know. She just disappeared. The police suspect someone took her. They suspect she was abducted.”

  “Ten years ago?”

  “Yes. She was never found. A body was never recovered. I had her presumed dead three years ago.”

  “Presumed dead?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why did you lie?”

  “It just seemed easier.”

  “Easier for who?”

  “For me.”

  I rolled my eyes. I took in a breath to stop the barrage of cuss words that had a high chance of spilling out.

  “So normally when wives go missing they always suspect the husband.”

  “That is true.”

  I waited for more of an explanation. “Well did they think you did something to her?”

  “I’m sure they did at first but--”

  “But what?”

  “I had an ironclad alibi.”

  Something about the words ironclad made my stomach rumble. “So that’s it. Caroline just vanished.”

  “Yes, I never got a divorce. I’m a widower.”

  “Still, why did you lie about it?”

  “I told you. It was easier. I didn’t think I would fall in love with you. I’m telling you the truth now.”

  “Why now?”

  “You were asking Jax about her.”

  Snitch! I didn’t have any problem admitting it. “Yes I was only because you never talk about her. You were yelling her name in your sleep.”

  “I don’t want to talk about her. There’s no point.”

  “So what do you think happened to her?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I didn’t ask you what you know. Tell me what you think happened to her?”

  “I think someone took her. I think someone killed her.”

  “Why?”

  “Because the world we live in is a dangerous place.”

  Bullshit! His words really sound like bullshit. Worse they sound rehearsed like he had said them before. I’m sure he has.

  I need to take a nap or go to bed. It was late. I felt exhausted. I didn’t even have the strength to hash this out any further. There are three things I learned today. First, Bash loves me. Second, Bash’s wife did not divorce him and third, Bash is a liar.

  I slept like forever and I only woke up when I felt Bash’s rock hard penis poke my butt cheek. He had snaked his hand under my pajama shirt and he had my breast in his palm. I hated the way my body responded to him. I loved it too. I was dick whipped already and he sealed my fate when he dropped the ‘L’ bomb on me. Nothing feels better than hearing a man you love tell you he loves you first.

  I love him too. Even in this short amount of time. Saying it out loud means I have surrendered. I haven’t just yet. I have just a little piece of my brain left that I still control.

  ★MONDAY★

  I went t
o work Monday morning and tried to do my job and process the things Bash said to me. I was over his violent German nightmare. I didn’t even want to dwell on that unfortunate incident. It wasn’t in my nature and to harp on that incident and make him feel guilty. That would just be a bitch move on my part.

  Maybe I should be concerned about Bash’s presumed dead wife but I’m not. He wasn’t charged with anything. He’s walking around free. Now it is time for me to do that Internet search. I closed the door to my office just for the sake of privacy.

  I typed in [Sebastian Vandervol] in the search engine. His company profile was the first thing to pop up. His picture was on the website along with a few other people that were higher-ups. There were a few paragraphs detailing his education and various work related things he had accomplished. It was impressive but dull. There was no mention of his family.

  There was no mention of a wife or a son. There was no mention of a disappearance. Maybe it was too long ago. Regardless I found it odd. I decided to type Jax Vandervol in the search engine. This gave me more than a few entries. Most of them were about his band. There was an official website page that I checked out. His Facebook, Twitter and Instagram showed up also. There were past tour dates and articles about his band Zombax. How was I supposed to figure out this disappearance nonsense without anything to go on?

  Lastly I searched Caroline Vandervol, a memorial website with a few pictures came up. She was a pretty blonde woman with green eyes and thin features. There was also two vague news articles that came up. Nothing really informative. Just she want missing, blab, blab, blab.

  I decided to let it go for now and focus on my work. My office phone rang and I answered.

  “Nina Norwood, Prudential Life, how can I help you?”

  “Nina this is your last chance.”

  It was David calling from some unrecognizable number. I got an instant headache. I thought this was over. It’s been a minute so damn I thought he had kicked rocks.

  “I called the police the last time you attacked me. I’m calling them again.”

  “Attacked, that’s a bit of an exaggeration.”

  “I’m hanging up now.”

  “No no no! Wait. Since we not together you need to give me back all the shit I bought you.”

  “What shit are you referring to?”

  “The diamond earrings.” Those were for my birthday. “Those fucking red bottoms.” Those were a Christmas gift. “That Louie V bag.” That was for our one-year anniversary.

  “Is there anything else?” I asked with the least amount of attitude I could convey to his Indian-giving ass. I was so done. There were more gifts he’s given me within the course of our relationship. I have no problem giving every single one of them back.

  I love Bash and I want to get David out my life for good before he sabotages the future I may have with Bash.

  “I will return everything.” I hung up on him.

  The first thing I did when I got home was pack every single item David ever bought me. I had a few packing boxes in the back of my closet. I only needed one. I put the diamond earrings in a plastic Ziploc bag. I put the purse directly in the box. I put the three pair of designer shoes in the shoeboxes and then into the packing box. If I could vomit up every meal he bought me I would put that in the damn box too.

  I packed a dress, lingerie, a gold bangle, a pair of Nike gym shoes and the Blu-ray player. I tossed a few DVD’s in the box. I made sure I took a picture of all the stuff while outside and inside the box. I pushed the box over to the door before I taped it shut. I needed to get my overnight bag ready for Bash’s. I gathered my underwear and a nice black and yellow dress for work tomorrow. I grabbed my yellow peep-toe pumps and yellow purse.

  I couldn’t wait to get home to Bash. Wait. Did I just call his place home? I did. Time to get a grip. We’re not even an official couple. This is just an endless amount of sleepovers. I need to stop going overboard.

  I left my house within an hour. I headed over to the post office to mail the box of gifts back to David. I probably wouldn’t have worn the items anymore anyway. I usually discard all items given to me by exes. That’s just how I do.

  I was so relieved to send that box off to that fool. I sent it right to his recording studio. Someone was going to have to sign for it. I needed proof I gave all that stuff back. I had planned to go into Bash’s house and act like he hadn’t told me his wife went missing ten years ago. Well that was the plan.

  I arrived after Bash. His Porsche was parked out front. He pulled up so I could have the vacant space closest to the front door. It was a nice gesture but he had a circular driveway so I wouldn’t have far to walk no matter where I parked.

  I grabbed my bag from the trunk. I walked into the front door, the door that was never locked. I entered and ran into little Javier.

  “Hi Nina.”

  “Hi Javi, how was school.” The little boy was so cute. He looked like a little Ricky Martin.

  “It was great. We went on a field trip.”

  “Where did you guys go?”

  “The zoo.”

  “Oh my that is great.” Seeing Javi made me want a kid of my own. He made me think of that perfect date Bash and I had at the zoo. He also made me think about the birth control pills I sometimes forgot to take.

  I had only missed a few pills here and there since I had been seeing Bash. It never was on purpose. It was just my stupid absentmindedness. I’m sure it had to do with my dual residence. I didn’t officially live with Bash but packing a bag everyday made it easy to forget some things. Changing purses to match outfits made it hard to remember everything. I have forgotten my wallet before, my makeup bag, my earrings.

  I made my way up the stairs. Bash was wet from a fresh shower. He smelled clean. He was standing in front of me in a towel. This was very distracting. I’m not sure I will ever get use to it.

  “What took you so long to get here?”

  “What happened to hello?” I barked.

  “Hello.” He took my shoulders in his hands and pulled me in for a quick kiss on the lips.

  “I had to go to the post office. The line was ridiculous.”

  “You’re always on time. I wanted to text you but I didn’t want to be too overprotective.”

  “You can be overprotective. I will allow it.”

  He smiled. He walked toward the mirror. He grabbed a comb and ran it through his hair. This was rare. Bash washed his hair every day but he rarely combed it. He would just let it do whatever it wanted to do. I raked it with my fingers a few times just to get it going in the right direction.

  “I want to ask you about Caroline.”

  “You do?” He stopped and turned toward me. He raised one of his perfect blonde eyebrows.

  “Yes, its not everyday you date someone that wife went missing. I want to know the backstory.”

  “I hate the story but I will tell you whatever you want to know. You obviously feel some way about it, about her.”

  “Obviously.” I took a few steps away from him. He looked too damn good in that towel. “Where did you meet her?”

  “In college, well near the college. She worked at an off campus restaurant I frequented.”

  “Was it love at first sight?” Okay kill me now. That was a dumb ass question.

  “No. I didn’t believe in love at first sight back then. She flirted with me. I flirted back.”

  “And?”

  “I didn’t have a girlfriend at the time. Caroline, she was pretty. She reminded me of Sharon Stone.”

  “Did you love her?”

  “When we married I did? I was young. We were young.”

  “Did you love her when she disappeared?”

  He hit me with silence. I didn’t think the question was that damn complex. I’m waiting Mr. Vandervol.

  “I ah, I ah, I didn’t love her at that time. Not anymore.”

  “Why not?”

  “She changed.”

  “Did she change or did you change?” I’m re
ally not trying to sound like a bitch. I just need to know.

  “She changed.”

  “Do you miss her?”

  “No.” His response was much too quick.

  “Why not?”

  “It’s been too long. Why do you want to know these things? I don’t understand why they would matter to you.”

  “I barely know you.”

  He frowned. “That’s bullshit. You know me very well.”

  “I know this Bash in front of me. I don’t know the childhood Bash, the married Bash or the Bash with the missing wife.”

  “My wife was missing. Now she’s legally dead.”

  “You sound so cold when you say it.”

  “I don’t think you can judge my tone. You have never had a missing spouse. You have never had to declare someone legally dead. You have never had a legally dead husband. Actually you have never had a husband.”

  My face went into ugly mode. “That was cruel. Are you being mean to me?” Damn, I sound like I’m in junior high.

  “I’m stating the facts.”

  “I’m asking questions.” I snapped back.

  “Yes you are and I’m giving you answers you don’t seem to like. I’m the one being interrogated by you. You don’t have the right to get your feelings hurt. Ask the stupid questions so we can be done with this. I want to fuck you.”

  What? He want to fuck. Who? Why was I turned on by his asshole commentary? This man right here is going to make me fuck him up. I will not be sidetracked.

  “Tell me what happened the day she went missing.”

  “I remember it was a Monday.” Bash left me standing as he took a seat on the couch. “I got up and went to work. She didn’t have a job. We agreed that she would be a stay-at-home mother. Money wasn’t an issue. Caroline she didn’t want to work and I was supportive of everything she wanted to do or not do. I was naïve, young and naïve. Well I worked late that day then I met my friend Graziano. We watched Monday night football at his place. He has a really lavish man-cave in the basement of his house. His wife made dinner it was gnocchi. I remember that because it was the first time I ever had gnocchi. I drink too much beer at his place. He drove me home. It was late. I got home and Caroline wasn’t there. I called her a few times and left messages on her cell. The police found her car abandoned two days later in Michigan. Her purse was in the car but her wallet was missing. There were leads but they all went cold. Days passed, months passed, years passed. That’s it. There is no more. After years of nothing, no viable or credible leads, I decided to have her presumed dead.”