This place was her little time out spot. A place that she could be alone, just to think. A place for her to slip back into the person that she used to be, so long ago.
No one ever bothered her when she was here. No one ever even came around, yet, sometimes, she swore that she could feel eyes upon her, as she made her twirls or spun down to the floor. With so many mirrors around her, she never could be sure, if maybe, one was fake. She assumed that it was Cole’s eyes, on her. He was like that. He liked two-way mirrors and spy gadgets, but either way, he never made himself known. Never came in to break her concentration with his presence. Which was fine by her. She didn’t wanna see him, today, anyway. Maybe never again for that matter.
She hadn’t really planned on coming here today but she needed to, she needed the break from her thoughts. She was hoping that Cole was nowhere around. He had mentioned, that he had auditions today, and those, tended to run pretty long.
After he had left her place last night, Penny spent the next few hours crying. Which, was just plain silly, really. Deep down, she tried to remind herself, that all that shit, was in past. She knew, she should just let it go already, but she couldn't. Yelling at him had only really served in ripping open all the old wounds between them. She had never done that before, never told him how she had really felt.
When she had walked in on him, that horrible day, so long ago, she had been, too hurt, to scream, to devastated, to even be able to cry. Seeing Cole in bed with those women had ripped her heart out
of her chest. It forced her to see how blind she had been. She had been refusing to see all the signs, and they were everywhere back then. All around her, yet, she just wouldn’t open her eyes to see them for what they were. She had seen the pictures in the papers, heard the rumors on T.V., but she refused to believe it true. Cole had told her how, ‘Hollywood’, was, warned her never to believe the shit you see in magazines. It's just them trying to drum up sales with bullshit gossip. That’s what he would say, when she brought it up, time and again, until finally, she just stopped bringing it up, all together. She refused to believe her own eyes, instead, choosing to stick her head in the sand. She wanted to go on as if nothing at all was wrong. She wanted, so much, to believe that one day, she and Cole would grow old together. She had picked fences, in her gaze, whenever he was near.
Looking back on it, she realized, that what had upset her the most, wasn’t him cheating, but was him forcing her to see the truth. Seeing him wrapped up in whores, forced her to finally admit, that all was not well between them. No longer could she look the other way and she hated him for that. She hated herself as well, for showing up that day, unannounced, the way she had. She often
wondered, if their lives would have been different if she had waited. If she had stayed in N.Y.C., until he came to her or at least until he actually knew she was coming to visit him. She wondered if she hadn’t shown up that day, how long she would’ve been able to continue, turning the other cheek. A lifetime maybe, who really knows?
Some days, she hated that she hadn't been given the opportunity, to do just that. Deny, deny, deny. She had loved Cole with everything she had back then, deep down, she still did. Part of her, the part that she refused to let out, most days, still loved him, loved everything about him. Her entire adult life, was wrapped up around him, in one way or another.
When they met back up, for the second time in their lives, she had tried to keep her distance. But Cole just refused not to be a part of her world. She could have tried harder, she was sure, but really, she hadn't wanted to. He was her crutch. That part wasn't fair to Cole and it wasn't fair to her, either. She couldn't move on with him so involved in her life, yet she wasn't ready to let him go completely, either. Their fight last night had just proved that the entire situation was becoming more than a little toxic. Everyone involved was getting sick from it.
It wasn’t just Cole, who had her head twisted up, either. She liked Able, more than liked him, actually. In fact, she had already fallen pretty damn hard for him, which sucked, because in the end it was only gonna end up causing her pain and heartache. Two things, that she already had in spades.
He was leaving soon and then their magical week, would be coming to an end. All she wanted to do was enjoy the little bit of time that she had left with him, but in the back of her mind, she knew that his, ‘good-bye’, was gonna crush her.
She knew, that it was way too soon, for her to be feeling any kind of connection to Able, hell, she hardly even knew the man. That didn’t stop her from feeling something, though. But, there were so many reasons why it couldn't work out between them. She could easily just blame the distance thing. They simply lived too far apart for anything lasting. But, the real reason that it couldn’t work out, was because of a lie, one she had told.
She wasn’t a dancer, not the kind he had her pegged for, not anymore, anyway. She was a stripper, he hadn't signed up for that. Able didn't seem like the kind of guy, that would be into that sorta of thing, either. If she had known that she was gonna end up crushing on him, so damn hard, she would have just told the truth, right from the start. She hadn’t though, and now, it was way too late for that. There was no point in telling him, it would just ruin the last couple of days that they had left. Besides, she wanted him to remember her fondly, not as the stripper bitch ,who had lied to him.
Sucking in a deep breath, Penny snatched the mask out of her bag. It was a gaudy little thing that went over her eyes. The club was having a masquerade theme night, and she wanted to see how the peacock feathered mask was going to effect her dancing, would it slip, would it itch, and could she still see, kind of shit. She stripped off her clothes until she was down to nothing but her spandex shorts and a matching black sports bra. And of course her, ballet slippers.
She tip-toed across the floor before gripping the large metal pole, in her hands.
Just then, the overhead speakers vibrated to life. Glancing around the room, she tried to locate their source but all she found was Cole. They hadn’t spoken or even sent a text to one another, since the big fight, and now, he was making his way in, shirtless, and in a pair of black ripstop pants. Even from across the room, she could see his muscles were tense. She eyed him, trying to read his face, wanting to know, which direction, this was all going to go down in.
"You think you can still remember the moves?” He questioned, in a low tone as he made his way to the middle of the floor.
So, it seemed, as if they were just gonna leave last night, where it was. Penny knew that she shouldn't allow it, knew that they really needed to work this out somehow, or just stop being around one another, all together. But, at the same time, she didn’t want to push it, not with him standing so near, and not with that storm brewing in his eyes, either.
"Every step…, how about you, old man? Do you think you still got it?" She challenged with the raise of her brow.
A little smirk, crept onto her lips as she watched Cole take the first pose. It had been years. She wasn’t sure, that either of them could, really pull it off, but she nodded just the same, taking her pose as well. The song blaring out from the speakers above them switched over to another track, one that couldn't have been more fitting for the wounded pair of lovesick fools.
This one was about another one biting the dust and not being able to conquer love, about fighting without weapons and seeing too many red flags but wanting it, just the same. Its lyrics, talked about not being broken, and the heart being elastic in nature.
At first, they were a little rusty, a bit slow on timing and step. But, as the seconds passed by, Penny found that they slipped back into it, with all the ease, of bedding an old lover.
She found that his moves were sharper now than they had been before. He had a lot more years of training under his belt than when they had done this last. His arms were more toned, his movements more controlled but somehow, it was all still the same for Penny.
Being in his arms felt natural, it felt right, and before she knew it, s
he was slipping away. Slipping back in time, to when they were young and so full of promise. She was lost to it, lost to the memory, lost to the present, lost to Cole, all over again. And, all it had taken, was just one dance.
Cole gripped Penny’s body to his, before spinning her out, hating the way it felt to let loose of her. Every time she left his embrace, he felt like he may never get the chance to hold her, ever again. That’s, the way it had always been, nothing had changed.
His kicks were high, his jab’s sharp, but he stayed constantly in control, knowing that he had to be precise in his moves. One wrong step and he could hurt her beyond repair, but then again, he already had.
She was just as beautiful now, as she had been the last time they had danced. That was at her audition, a lifetime ago. Now, though, it seemed so much closer, so much more recent. The years melted away, one jump at a time.
She was older now, her features more defined, her body holding thicker curves. Her years as a stripper had made her movements sexier. She swayed her hips more, was more aware of her body and what it was capable of doing to others.
She felt like home as she pressed herself to Cole, molding herself around his frame. There was a look in her eyes, a memory they were sharing, one that was both happy and sad, at the very same time.
His want for her, had Cole holding Penny even closer than was needed for the dance. It had her having to rip herself from his embrace, time and again. Something had changed, it had become more than just a dance. They were fighting, talking, fucking, and hating. Loving and crying, all in step to the music. They were having full conversations, without a word being spoken.
It wasn’t long, before they fell out of step to their old routine, stepping their way into an entirely new, version. One where neither, knew exactly, what the next move would be, neither knowing what the other would do, just like in life. They were forced to bend, to give, and take, to wait and rush, all in order to stay in step, with the other. At times, it came out rough and choppy and at others it was smooth and gentle. It was just like their sex.
Touches lingered and looks were passed. An electricity was filling the room. One, that had both of them on edge. The lift was coming, and the song was ending. They had danced around it as long as they could, time was running out. Words, were being screamed between the pair as clear as day, yet neither, had said a word aloud.
"I got you!”
“You, let me fall!”
“I'm so sorry, let me fix it!”
“I can't forgive you!”
“I don’t care, I still, can't let you go!"
It was all shouted back and forth between the pair in movements, yelled in looks, as the words echoed off their souls.
Then, all at once, they both stilled, a distance between their bodies that seemed to hold all the answers. Their eyes were locked, both pleading with the other to hear them out, to forget and forgive, or to somehow, just make it all better, again. As if it was all that simple.
“Cole?” It was barely a whisper off Penny’s trembling lip, it had been more seen than heard.
“I… got… you,” he lipped the words to her, with a nod.
Another moment passed, one that had felt like an eternity. In all reality, though, it was only a few beats of the song. Boom, Boom, boom, and then Penny was off and running, her feet barely seeming to touch down as she launched herself his way.
She was terrified but for once, she didn’t have to be. Cole caught her, with what seemed like ease, pushing her upwards as she twisted in his arms until she was high above him. He had her. He hadn’t in the past, but in this moment, he did.
Cole’s entire reason for living was being held up, by one hand, his hand. Heartbeats passed, time stilled, and the music hit a note that had everything, crashing down around them.
Penny closed her eyes, it was now or never. He would either catch or he wouldn't. There was so much more than just reflexes in play. She twisted out of his grip, like a bullet, out of its chamber. Fast and dangerous.
Three heartbeats later, found her once again, safely wrapped in his arms Her body slid down his as they came to stand toe to toe with one another. Neither released the other as they locked
eyes. Neither spoke a word.
A million year moment, passed between them before Cole reached out to run his fingers down her cheek, instantly Penny jerked away, turning her back on him. She wasted no time in making a step toward the bench to collect her things.
The moment was too deep, she couldn't deal with it or what she had almost just done. She had wanted to reach for Cole, she had wanted to feel him, wanted his touch, his taste. She just wanted all of him. She tried to tell herself that it was just the dance that had her all fucked up, but she knew that wasn't true. It was so much more than that. So, damn, much more.
As Cole reached out for her hand, Penny turned around fast, slapping him hard enough across the cheek, to leave her handprint on his tan skin. Her eyes filled with confusion. She had no idea why she had just done that, she hadn’t meant to. She wasn’t normally a violent person, it’s just that she felt so damn raw. It was as if, his touch, had poured salt into a fresh wound. Quickly, she jerked her hand away. Unable to face him and unwilling to apologize for her actions, she turned, once again, to walk away.
She needed to get away from him before it was too late, before she did something she was gonna regret. She had gotten caught up in a moment, in a memory, no more, no less. Nothing had really changed, she tried to remind herself.
She made it all the way to the wall, but before she could grab her bag, she was spun around fast, her feet jerked off the floor as he lifted her into the air, forcing her into his arms as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Cole’s mouth, smashed against hers at the exact same moment that her back slammed up against the mirrored wall.
In a million years, it would never happen again. A faulty mirror, a small imperfection, agitated by brute force, had the mirror smashing into a million pieces, causing the glass to rain down all around them. Cole, never even broke the kiss, as the floor collected the shards.
The kiss was fire and ice, sending lightning through both their souls as Penny clung to him. She couldn’t get close enough, even though, she knew, she should be pushing him away. Her body wouldn’t allow that, though. Her very being refused the notion. So instead, she pushed all thoughts, out of her mind, and instead, indulged in the addiction that was his touch, his taste, and all things Cole Conners. She had always been a little junkie for him, always feigning for his embrace, for his love.
Their skin was slick with sweat, their moans filling the studio. The only piece of glass still solid and intact was resting behind her back as she ground herself against him.
It was dirty and rushed. No care was taken as panties were ripped off flesh and sweatpants were pushed down to free a rock hard cock. It only took moment before Cole was buried inside her walls, filling her completely with every, skilled thrust, of his toned hips. Her nails, clawing at his bare back, left angry looking, gouges in their wake. His mouth left hers, only to attack her neck, attack that spot that made her eyes roll back and her head tilt.
There was no skill to their fucking. A pounding, jerking interaction, that had the pair panting into one another.
It seemed, to all come out of nowhere and just like that, it was over. He spilled into her at the exact moment she locked down on his shaft, crying out his name as she came apart at the seams.
Their breaths were heavy as the world settled back into existence. The space that had set filled with electricity, not seconds before, now, felt lifeless and cold, silent and harsh. Their eyes stayed locked on one another until her feet touched back down on the floor. Their connection broken, she turned away from him. Her first few steps were awkward and bit wobbly as the glass crunched beneath her ballet slippers.
Cole watched, as she snatched up her waist wrap, quickly tying it around her hips before pulling on her old beater boots. One last look his way, over her shoulder and then Pe
nny was gone.
Just like all the times before, he didn’t chase after her, he just stayed back, watching as she made her escape.
"Where the fuck are you, man? Twitter is blowing the fuck up!" Able questioned when Cole finally answered his phone.
He had spent the last hour and a half trying to reach him, all the while trying to scrub, scribbles of dicks and curse words, off his body.
"I'm at the gym, why, what's going on?" Cole questioned with a bit of an annoyed tone.
He really didn't want to talk to Able, right now. He needed to figure shit out first. Like, what the hell had just happened between he and Penny? He knew it was something big, huge even. It had meant something, even if she didn’t seem ready to deal with it.
Whatever it was, it had given Cole hope and made him know for a fact, that he needed to get Able out of the picture.
"Holy shit, you really don’t know?! Oh my, God, this is fucking epic! I'm hanging up; I gotta send you something and by the way, you’re a fucking animal, dude!" Able informed, sounding way too excited as the line went dead.
Cole eyed his phone, trying to figure out what in the hell his friend was so worked up about. He didn’t have to wonder for long. A moment later, a message popped up, inside, a link. Cole cautiously clicked, before his eyes went as wide as saucers.
It was all there, Penny, him, the dance, all of it. He watched on in horror as the familiar music blared out of the speakers on his device. The person holding the camera seemed to have a bit of a shake, and the image was blurry, and more than a little pixelated, and grainy but it was clearly Cole on the tape. Thank God, Penny was hidden behind her mask, safe from the world finding out who she was.
All of it, the entire exchange, it was all there to see. He felt so violated as he watched it play out. The moment had been a deep one, so filled with secrets, yet, here it was, for all the world to see. He watched on, with his jaw dropped as the glass shattered and the fuck fest began. Lucky for him, all that could really be seen, was the top of his ass cheeks as he flexed into Penny, over and over again. Thank Goodness, the asshole who shot it, didn't zoom in, he kept the video wide, but there was gonna be no denying that the people in the video, were fucking like animals. Great, a sex tape scandal, just what he needed!
Between a Rock and a Hard Place Page 27