"Your Livi… is my, Penny Lane. I'm sorry man, I didn't know at first. You called her Livi and she was calling you Holden. I didn't put it together until that night we got drunk at the hotel. I saw a picture of you two on your phone. You had, my girl’s, picture was on your phone Able, what the fuck was I supposed to do?”
Able shook his head, not believing what he was reading as he skipped, to yet another, message.
“I set you up, brother. I took you right to her. I couldn't let you take her from me, man. I couldn't lose her, not like that. Not anyway. I can't lose her, Able. It was wrong, I know that, now. I should’ve just told you, but I didn't, and I'm sorry for that. But, now that you two are over, I feel like I can tell you the truth. I hope you can forgive me, someday. I never wanted to hurt you or Penny, but I couldn't let you two, keep going on the way you were. I was a coward, I’m so sorry. Please, just text me back, or better yet, call me! I need to know that we’re gonna be okay, brother.”
Able sat there with his teeth grinding and his heart twisting. It was all there, clear to see, yet, he was still somehow confused by it. How could that be? How could Livi be Penny, and how could Cole, have kept that from him? How could he lie and trick him like that when he was supposed to be his friend. Hell, he was his only real friend, or at least Able had thought, he was. Not to mention, Livi, or Penny, or whoever the hell she was, now. How could she fail to mention, that her ex, was Cole Conners?
It made sense, now, though, her hating fame, celebrities, and everything that came along with it. Cole had told Able their entire story. Penny must blame Cole’s success for ending their relationship.
Images, flashed through Able’s mind of he and Penny’s time together, the Ally where they first met, the beach and the Hollywood sign, the old stage she had danced on, and of last night. It all felt so wrong, now that he knew, that she had been Cole’s Penny Lane, all along. He didn’t know who he was more upset with, himself, for fucking the love of Cole’s life, or, Cole, for setting him up.
That night, at the strip club, had devastated Able and now, here was Cole, telling him that it was all his doing. Cole was supposed to be his friend, how could he do that to him? I mean, for fuck sake, after that shit all went down, it was Cole, who had comforted him.
Why hadn’t Cole just told him the truth? God, this must have been killing him. Ablel couldn't help but to, kinda, see things from his friend's side. The man loved Penny, he couldn’t fault him for that but it still didn't seem right. He was torn.
"Please talk to me!"
A new message popped up, again from Cole, making Able chew his cheek as he typed one back.
"Stop messaging me, dude! I'm trying to figure this shit out."
"I'm so sorry man, but I didn't see any other options, until after it all went down, the way it did. I love her so fucking much and I love you too but, I couldn't lose her, I just couldn’t."
"You should have just fucking told me; I'm pissed!"
"I should have. You’re 100%, right. I just couldn't let her know that we knew each other. She would’ve just ditched us both. I'm telling you the truth, brother. We both would have lost her in the end."
"I, still lost her, you asshole!” Able snarled his lip, glaring at his phone.
"I know and that sucks, but how do you think I was feeling? You, had her for a week, man. I've loved her for over a decade!"
“I know, it's just fucked up. I trusted you, and you were shady as fuck about the whole damn situation."
"I was, but Jesus, it was only a week! You can't fall in love in just a week, Able. That’s not how it works. You didn't even fuck her yet, man. It wasn't like I ripped away your soul mate or some
shit. That, is exactly what was happening to me, though. I love her, I've always loved her, and I always will. You don’t want to get messed up in that. I know you, too damn well, for you to try to tell me, that you can’t see it from my side.”
"I do see it, but…,” Able started his message then smacked himself in the forehead.
The truth was, is that he had fallen for Penny, in just a week, but, that wasn't what earned him the hit. He also had fucked her, in fact, he had fucked the ever loving shit out of her. Hell, his cock, still smelled like her pussy.
He had fucked, Cole Conners main woman, the love of his life, the only girl he had ever thought enough about, to fuck more than twice. Able had fucked his best friend’s girl.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Able cursed, just a little too loud, earning him odd looks, from a few other people in first class.
This was bad, this was really bad. If Cole ever found out, Able would be a dead man walking. He swallowed hard. His brain, already playing him images, of all the different ways, Cole was capable of killing him in. The man wasn’t just a badass on the big screen. He was equally, if not more capable in real life.
The only thing holding Able together was the fact that Penny, didn’t know either. Cole hadn’t told her the truth and didn’t seem to have any interest in doing so. She had no clue that they were besties, so, why would she ever tell Cole that she had hooked up with him in the first place? That wasn't something she would throw in his face. Honestly Able didn’t know much about her, but he knew that she wasn’t that type of person. To Penny, Able was just some guy that she hooked up with, one time. No more, no less. Those were, her words, to him. She wanted it that way.
This could be okay, as long as Cole never found out. It was over and done with anyway. Able was never gonna see her again, Penny had made that, very clear, right along with the fact, that she didn't want anything to do with him, after last night. That part, hurt the worst.
"You there, man? Come on, don’t be like this! It was over before it started, right? You're never gonna see her again, right? Can't we just move past this? I mean shit, I almost murdered you when I found out, but I didn't and that’s because I fucking love you!”
Able eyed the message, nervously tapping, on the side of his phone. Cole was right, it was, all said and done.
"I love you, brother…"
A wave of guilt washed over Able as he read Cole’s, latest message. The guy was killing him with this shit. Sure, Cole had been an ass, about setting him up, but on the switch side; Able had fucked the love of Coles life. You never fuck your friend's girl. That had always been the first rule of guy code or at least it was in the top five, that was for damn sure. A very large rule had been broken by Able, weather he had meant to or not.
On the other hand, he didn't like feeling guilty about being with Penny. What they had shared had been special, it had really meant something to him, anyway. Feeling bad about it, made it seem like a spit in the face to what they had had. Whatever that had been.
Truthfully, Able wanted to scream, at everyone involved. Fuck Cole, for loving her first, and fuck Penny, for making everyone around her, fall head over heels stupid for her. The girl was a love potion, bubbling over onto everyone near. And fuck himself, for daring to think that this time would be different. Able didn’t scream, though, instead, he rolled his eyes, sending another text.
"Yeah Man, I'm here. I love you too. You're right, it's done. Let's just forget it ever happened and never bring it up again, like ever.”
“Never, dude! Why the fuck would I? You almost banged my girl. I don’t wanna be reminded of that shit."
"Yeah, that makes sense. I gotta go though, pilot’s telling us to kill the phones. I’ll hit you up later."
Able dropped his phone in his lap before scrubbing at his eyes. All he wanted was to go home, far, far away from Cali and the mess that he was leaving behind.
Chapter 20
A s Cole strolled through the changing room at The Kitty Kat Club, he received a few winks, several smirks, and even, one number, being shoved into his shirt pocket. All the girls were half clothed, and seemed hungry, for whatever had him walking through the place, actin like he owned it. He paid none of them any mind, though. He was on a mission.
"Hey, where's Penny Lane?" He finally stopped
to question, a redhead, who was busy stuffing her large breasts into an itty bitty corset.
"I think I saw her heading into the showers. Do you want me to go get her for ya?" The older woman questioned, eyeing him like he was stripper bait. The kind of look that made a man feel a bit sticky.
"Nope, I got it!" He assured her with a wink, as he made his way by her, heading in the direction that her fake press on nail was pointing.
He found that the showers at the club, were pretty much the same as at his gym It was a large tiled room with five shower heads, lined up in a row, along the back wall.
Quietly, he turned, sliding the lock shut on the main door, before turning his attention back to Penny Lane. His eyes never left her as he slowly started to peel away his clothes. First came his cowboy boots, the ones that Penny, had gotten him, so many years ago, at that little flea market that she loved so much. Next came his socks, followed by his button down and blue dress jeans.
Penny meanwhile, never took note of him as she kept her face pointed up to the showers spray, her eyes closed nice and tight. Cole watched as the suds slipped over her body, pooling around her feet. He knew, that there was a 50/50 chance, that she might slap him across the face before, telling him to fuck off, but he would take the odds, because maybe, just maybe…, she wouldn't.
It had been a month since all that bullshit with Able had popped off. A month of her giving him, one-word texts, and of her avoiding him, at all costs. When he came to see T.J., she would hide in her room, until he left out, again. He wasn't about to give up, though. They had been through, way worse. Lord knows, she had tried to brush him off, much harder in the past, to no avail.
"Jesus Christ, Cole! What the fuck? You can't be in here!" Penny screeched, just as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against his body, as he stepped into the water’s warm spray.
"Sure I can. See, I'm right here?" Cole offered with a shrug and a smirk, still holding her body close to his.
"What do you want, Cole? And…, why are you naked?" She questioned, letting out an annoyed sigh as she turned around in his arms.
Penny had been on her feet all day, dancing, way too many, sets. She was tired, and more than a little cranky. All she wanted to do was get cleaned up, get into her junky ass car, and head on home to her shitty little apartment. At least there, she could crawl back into her bed, and pass the hell out, until she could somehow manage to pull herself out of this horrid funk that she was in. So far, that approach hadn’t worked but she was willing to keep trying. At this point, she would try just about anything.
She had spent the last month, feeling like a zombie. Wanting nothing more then to tune out the entire world. She hated that she felt that way, because she knew T.J. was suffering, right along with her. The kid hated it when she got like this, but even that, couldn't force her to snap out of it.
Cole, had been trying to make it right but she wasn't too interested in that, either. She wasn't interested in anything, really.
"Well, let’s see. I'm here to see you because you keep avoiding me, and I'm naked, because we’re in the shower, silly girl." He informed like it was just that simple. He finished by leaning in and giving the very tip of her nose a little peck.
"Stop, okay, just stop! I'm not in the mood for your cutesy bullshit, Cole." She announced, with a scowl, as she rolled her eyes, trying and failing, to pull out of his naked, wet, embrace.
Cole wasn’t gonna allow that. Instead, he backed her up, until her back pressed against the tiled wall. Quickly, he blocked her in, placing both his palms, flat on the shower wall that set on, either side of her shoulders.
"What Cole, what do you want from me?!"
She was in his face, her eyes hard on his.
"I want you to stop! Talk to me, scream at me, if you must, anything but this. I know you're pissed, I know I fucked up, but you can't keep this shit up, Penny Lane!”
“Oh really, and why is that? Why can’t I, huh, answer me that?” She mocked.
“T.J. called me today.”
“Oh, I bet he did.”
Once again Penny was rolling her eyes.
“Ya, you bet your ass, he did! He's fucking worried about you and so am I. He told me he hears you crying at night and that you’re sleepin’ all day.” Cole recounted, trying to keep his voice, low and even. He needed her to hear him out, screaming in her face, wasn’t his best course of action and he knew it.
“He’s hearing shit, and I work all night, so ya, I sleep all day. Shocker!”
Penny wasn’t hearing any of it, as she tossed her defense back, with an attitude of indifference.
“It’s not just that. He said you haven’t been eating either, and looking at you, I can see he ain’t lying. You look like shit.”
“Oh, go fuck yourself, Cole! You ain’t looking too hot either, asshole!”
“Noted, but I’m not here for me, I'm here for you, and I’m hear, because T.J., asked me to be. He wants me to try to get to the bottom of this shit. I don’t know what your deal is lately but I need you to pull yourself out of it, not for me but for your son. He needs you, Penny.” Cole, could see that his words were hitting home, Penny’s face was turning a bit red, her muscles clutching as she ground her jaw. She was good and pissed, he could see her anger wanting to bubble over. She never did like getting confronted. Too bad, though, because that’s exactly what she needed. She didn’t say a word, though, so he went on. “You look like you wanna hit me. Is that what you want?”
“Maybe, I do.” She confessed, her eyes hard on his.
“Then, do it! If you wanna scream, do that too, throw a level thousand meltdown, I don’t give a shit. But don’t you fucking dare, take whatever has crawled up your ass and died, out on that boy. He deserves a mother that’s not, checked out, all the the fucking time. Don’t you get that?”
Penny’s eyes, darted everywhere but to look at Cole. She knew he was right, knew she had been slacking. She took a deep
breath, trying like hell, to fight back her tears.
"Cole, I’m so damn tired of everything. I just don’t know what to do with myself anymore." She confessed, finally looking back his way.
She hated that his eyes were so damn green, so clear, and filled with concern. She hated his eyes, hated that she saw, care in them, love even, and a lot of it. She even hated that he brought his palm off the wall to wipe her tear away with the pad of his thumb. Damn him.
“Then you need to let me help you.”
“Cole, we can’t…,”
“I know, that I can’t have you back, I do, and I also know, that you can’t love me, not the way you once did, but that doesn’t mean that you have to shut me out completely, either. I’m not asking you to be with me, Penny. I just want you to let me be there for you, and T.J., just like I’ve always been. I'm a fuck up, Penny Lane. I've always been a fuck up, though, and yet, I’m still right here. You still let me be here. That’s gotta mean something, doesn’t it? It’s just got to, right? I know it does, because deep down, I know you still care about me, I know you do, no matter how hard you try to pretend that you don’t." He rasped, trying to get through the storm that was raging in Penny’s eyes.
"You just can’t seem to understand how hard it is for me, to be around you. It's hard, not to want you, every second of the day, but it’s even harder, trying to forget what you did to us. You hurt me, so bad. I can't just pretend like that never happened. I can't let you in, not all the way. It's not fair to me and it’s not fair to you, either. I know that, I really do. I know it’s not fair to you, that I come running back, every time the shit hits the fan. You were right, that day, in your driveway. It’s not right and I shouldn’t do it.” Penny said with the shake of her head.
"Fuck that, keep doing it, run to me a million times if ya gotta. I'm gonna be there, every time, I promise you that. Penny, I wanna be there, I wanna be that guy you run to.”
“It’s not fair to you, though.”
“You, just let me, worry
about what's fair, and what’s not. Like I said, I know I can't have all of you, but damn it, woman, let me have just a little bit, here and there. Let me, at least, make you happy, in the ways that I still can. I don’t mind being used Penny Lane, not when it’s by you."
He was so damn close to her lips, his breath hot, as he spoke the words that, most women, are dying to hear. Hell, even Penny, who knew better, was starting to believe him. That was Cole for ya, though. The man always had such an energy to him. Just being
near him, filled you with chaos. It would have you thinking stupid thoughts and doing even stupider things. Penny knew she should stick to her guns, be strong, and keep him at bay, but she was so damn lonely, so needy for something, anything that felt like comfort at this point.
She had a hole inside her, that she couldn't seem to fill. She knew, that Cole was just a band aid, but damn, what a fucking band-aid, he was. He had always been her home and when he wasn’t near, it left her feeling homeless. The last month without him around had killed her, just as much as her broken heart from Able, had.
"Let me make it better, please, just let me in." He half whispered, leaning in to place a soft kiss on her lips as his fingertips skimmed the sides of her body.
Penny’s skin was on fire from his touch. She couldn’t help the moan that escaped her lips as he kissed down her neck. One of his skilled hands, found her breast, while the other, slid up her thigh to cup her sex. His fingers, rubbing gentle circles as he licked and sucked at her rock hard buds.
Slowly, Penny’s head tilted back against the shower wall. A relieved breath seeping from her lips. She had just taken a main vein hit of Cole Conners, and it had her feeling more than a little lightheaded. The hurt that she had been feeling, all seemed to slip away, pleasure taking its place. Cole worked her body over, in the way, only he, knew how. He knew her every curve, knew her spots, and exactly what needed to be done, to get her right where she needed to be.
Between a Rock and a Hard Place Page 33