by M. R. THOMAS
“Nice to meet you” he said “You’re very welcome and I hope you enjoy your stay here. If you want anything just ask, the shop is open to 5.30pm. I’ll get you some fresh bedding, and there are electric heaters in the other rooms, and hot water on demand.”
“Great” she said, “thank you, I’ll get my things from the car”.
“OK, I’ll see you in a while with the bedding”.
As Simon left Abbie felt a pang of sadness for him; a decent soul living here in this remote location, running a small family business and looking after his dad.
The caravan was rapidly becoming warm and cosy, the thick bench seats so comfortable that Abbie decided she didn’t need to use the bedroom but could happily sleep here instead.
She went to the car to get her bag, and going back into the shop again for a few supplies, the old man seemed to have forgotten already that they’d met less than half an hour earlier. When Abbie explained that she was staying in the caravan, he told her to take whatever supplies she needed and pay at the end of her stay; as grateful as she was, she insisted on paying straight away.
When she reached the caravan with her luggage and shopping Simon was knocking on the door with bedding and a quilt, and he smiled shyly as though he shouldn’t have been outside this young woman’s door.
Once Simon had gone, Abbie sat and drank in the peace and tranquillity; she couldn’t believe her luck at finding this perfect place, peaceful and hidden away from public view; she could come and go as she pleased and all for fifty quid!
As the light began to fade and the temperature dropped, the sky took on a bright reddish glow.
A fine day for run in the morning she thought.
Abbie unpacked her things, and decided on a simple tea of soup and sandwiches for the second mealtime today; to her surprise she found that she was quite hungry and devoured the lot.
As she was clearing up her dishes Abbie heard a noise and some sort of commotion outside in the garden on the other side of the thick hedge, but couldn’t quite make out what it was.
It continued for some time so Abbie decided to investigate in the half light, and she found Simon playing roughly with an athletic-looking Jack Russell terrier, pulling and tugging with a rope. Abbie watched them for a few moments before Simon noticed her, and he stood up and waved to her, Abbie waving back.
She noticed again there was something about his face, his expression of kindness, coupled with an air of innocence and sincerity. She walked down the path towards him, and in an instant the dog was running in loops around her ankles; she bent down to stroke it, but it swerved away from her and disappeared into the undergrowth.
“Hi again” she said
“Hello Abbie, you settling in?”
“Yes it’s lovely, thank you for letting me stay. Can I ask you something? Earlier I drove out of the village and saw the beach over the other side of the hill and the headland, how do I get there on foot?”
“Well then” began Simon, “there’s two ways: take the hill up the road and eventually you come to a small stony car park after about a mile and from there you can get to the beach, or if you go down the far side of the lifeboat station there’s a small path that will take you up over the hill; it’s more direct but steep on both sides, and that will drop you down on to this end of the beach, from here that way is no more than ten minutes’ walk. You are planning on walking then?”
“Running actually, I love it so want to get onto the beach”.
“It’s a long one that beach, about five miles end to end, some days due to the sea mist you can’t see the whole way from up top”.
“Really? That’s excellent, just what I want.”
“At low tide when the sea is out you can run on the hard stuff at the edge of the surf, otherwise it might be too soft.”
“That true, when is low tide then?”
Simon smiled, and looked a bit sheepish, “actually, to be honest I don’t have the foggiest! When the sea’s gone out and the sand’s damp!”
They both laughed, and Abbie shivered and wrapped her arms around herself as the air was getting cool. Simon advised, “you’d best get indoors, don’t get cold”.
“Come on Jess”, he shouted for the dog, which immediately appeared from the base of a nearby shrub.
Abbie nodded “Thanks and good night”.
“Good night Abbie” he replied.
As she turned and walked away down the path to the caravan, she thought she could feel his gaze on her back.
Darkness fell quickly; Abbie closed the curtains and locked the doors, feeling warm, safe and snug. She telephoned her mum and then Kate to tell of her adventures so far, just as a good daughter and friend should, she thought.
After showering and changing into her pyjamas, she got between the covers of her comfortable caravan bed and lay down. After a few minutes of concentrating her mind and focus on Peter and her desire to be with him, she was aware of her consciousness shifting fast, left then right, and in a moment she was with him again and enveloped in a sea of golden brightness.
The next morning was bright, the sky cloudless; the air was crisp, colder than at home she thought, but then home did feel a million miles away right now. Dressed in her running gear, Abbie remembered to take a water bottle with her as she was planning a long run.
Outside everything was silent apart from a few gulls screeching overhead. It was 8 am, and Abbie walked at a brisk pace through the village with her hat pulled down over her ears.
She felt the coolness of the sea air as she walked, taking in the unique vistas of the coloured cottages and painted fences. Everywhere was quiet and not a soul in sight, the village seemingly not yet awake to this new day. She walked past the pub and cafe, opposite the small harbour and found the path at the side of the lifeboat station.
The ground upwards over the hill was steep and rough underfoot but also hard which made it easier going. By the time she reached the top of the hill and emerged for the shrubs she felt warm and was already breathing quite hard.
At the top the ground levelled out, it was rocky and barren and as she crossed it she could hear the sound of the surf breaking on the beach long before she could see it. Eventually the whole curving arch of the beach came into view and Abbie had to stop to take it all in and admire its beauty.
The thunder of the rolling surf filled her ears and she could almost taste the saltiness in the freshness of the air.
After a few minutes’ rest, Abbie set off down a path towards the beach that looked entirely deserted. The wind wasn’t strong and as the surf ended on the shore line, a mist hung in the air as far as the horizon. She noticed a wide strip of firm wet sand just in front of where the surf broke; low tide, just as Simon had said, she thought.
As she continued down the steep path that led on to the sand, she noticed various paths going in different directions.
Coming towards the bottom of the path near the beach, Abbie thought she saw something flesh-coloured out of the corner of her eye, higher up the hill; she turned towards it and stopped to look.
To her surprise on the path above her Abbie could see the man in the light- coloured coat with the cane, who had waved to her on the road the day before. As she stopped she saw he was watching her and he raised his hand in a greeting, to which Abbie responded. She felt relieved that this sighting was a person, a human being and one who seemed friendly too.
The path down to the beach was loose underfoot requiring extra care, and with each step she seemed to sink deeper into the sand. At the bottom of the dune path Abbie paused to take in her surroundings; she was at the end of the beach, near the village which was the other side of the headland.
She walked a few metres to the rocks at the edge of the foot of the cliff, and the tide was steadily lapping at the base of the rocks in its rhythmical fashion; apart from the noise of the waves, all was generally silent and calm.
She looked back up the path from where she’d come, but the friendly stranger had gone, an
d she was now alone in this deserted place.
Abbie rested against one of the rocks for a few minutes, just enjoying the beauty and ruggedness of her surroundings; after all she thought, she had all the time that she wanted.
After a few moments she went down to the water’s edge, and when one of the waves approached, she bent down and put her fingers in the water testing the temperature. The sudden sharp coldness penetrated her skin to the bone, and she laughed at herself. What had she expected - warmth in November in the north east UK?!
Somehow, surrounded by the natural beauty of her isolated haven, Abbie felt a kind of peacefulness that had evaded her for some time. She was amazed at the unique tranquillity of the place: the wide-open spaces, the seclusion, even the weather, it somehow seemed to penetrate deeply into her soul.
Abbie set off running again at a steady pace, the sand feeling firm underfoot as the waves receded for a time. She had to dodge a few rock formations and water-clogged pools as she ran, and the coolness of the breeze hit her as she emerged from the shelter of the nearby rock face of the cliff. The beach arched in a gentle curve away and into the distance.
Five miles, Simon had said. She knew this would be a long and steady run, no heroics, no going flat out; just to get there and back would be enough. Abbie decided she wanted time to herself and to be alone. She thought of astral projection but decided not to, she needed to be more familiar with her surroundings and to be absolutely sure that she was safe here; she knew Peter wouldn’t mind this. After all, she had all the time she needed and could go to him any time she desired.
This run was about endurance and stamina so Abbie decided to avoid looking at her watch, as time she felt was somewhat irrelevant.
After what felt like a long time, she approached the far end of the beach, and the landscape changed significantly. There were no rocks or ruggedness, but rather low sandy mounds that gave way to rough sea grass and then to low- lying fields beyond.
To her surprise Abbie found running on sand rather more taxing physically than she’d anticipated, and her legs felt almost too heavy to move.
She slowed to walking pace for a few minutes before turning round and heading back up towards the village. She felt tired but exhilarated: five miles completed. She couldn’t resist looking at her watch and estimated that she’d been running for about 55 minutes, and she set off again this time lengthening her stride to ease out the stiffness in her legs.
She found now that the wind had diminished and the air felt still, and she was still the only person on the whole beach.
As she ran her stomach began to rumble, and she realised she’d not eaten since the evening before. For now, her regular sips of water would have to do as that was all she had. In just less than an hour since she’d set off running, Abbie arrived back at the rocks where she’d started.
As she slowed down she was very aware of fatigue setting in, so she spent a few minutes stretching then set off up the dune path back to the sanctuary of her caravan. At the top as she approached the rocky clearing, she again saw the man in the beige coat walking on the road, using his stick for assistance with a slight limp. He was very neatly dressed and looked quite distinguished, Abbie thought, dark hair greying at the temples, she guessed in the age range of late fifties.
Once he saw Abbie, the man left the road and crossed the open ground towards her. Abbie’s breathing had only just returned and she felt a little unable to speak.
“Good morning, a beautiful day?” he said.
“Yes it is”.
”I love these bright mornings, and today’s not too cold. Have you been far?”
“To the end of the beach and back”
“Running all that way?”
Abbie, still breathing heavily, merely nodded.
“That’s mighty impressive” he replied. “I’m just out for my daily walk, not as quick as I used to be but I enjoy it. Good day to you”.
“’Bye” Abbie replied. As she walked away, she thought to herself that he seemed too smart and well-dressed for a country walk, and not really prepared for the possible bad weather, but then again maybe he knew no different.
Back at the caravan, she had to eat something straight away to remove the dull ache in her belly that was getting too much to bear.
Later on at lunch time that day she went down to the harbour for a walk, and again felt free and unburdened by the woes she had encountered back home. She treated herself to a full English breakfast at the harbour café; she was amazed at how good the food tasted, so fresh and full of flavour. The cafe was quiet with no other customers, and she enjoyed being an anonymous visitor; no questions asked or answers needed. Besides she thought, if anyone did ask, she could tell them anything, they wouldn’t know any better. She laughed to herself: she could tell them she was a TV script writer seeking out a new location for a drama; that would soon get tongues wagging, exciting the locals towards their fifteen minutes of fame.
Abbie spent the afternoon quietly, a bit of reading and listening to music on her MP3 player. In the warmth her eyelids grew ever heavier and she struggled to keep them open, eventually drifting into a slumber.
When she woke she noticed it was already getting dark outside, the light beginning to fade. It doesn’t matter, she thought, all my time is my own; I can do what I want, when I want, and there no one to answer to.
The caravan was warm and a bit stuffy, so Abbie decided to put her coat on and go outside for some fresh air.
In the still evening she decided to take the short walk down to the harbour. The village seemed deserted; where did all these people go, she thought, if they were ever here?
The water in the harbour was still, and the boats seemed glued to the mirror -like surface where they were moored, reflecting their images on the polished sea. She sat on a bench taking in the fresh and still air. The sky was taking on a reddish hue as the sun was setting inland, the water too becoming a subtle shade of pink and violet.
“Hello” said a voice from behind her. Abbie turned and saw Simon with Jess, out for a walk.
“Hi” she replied.
“You had a good day?” Simon asked.
“Yes, thanks very relaxing. I fell asleep this afternoon so I’ve just come out for some air”
“Been running?”
“Yes, on the beach this morning, it was good but hard work”.
“How far did you go?”
“To the far end of the beach and back”.
“My, that’s a long way, how long did it take you?”
“Two hours or so, although my legs now think it was longer”, she smiled.
Simon sat on the end of the bench, Jess obediently lying at his feet.
“Everything OK in the caravan?”
“It’s really fine, very comfortable, thank you”.
“Good, if you need anything the shop’s open till five-ish”.
“No I’m fine at the moment, thanks”
For a few minutes they sat in silence, just enjoying the evening air and stillness.
Simon then said that Jess needed feeding so he was heading back. Abbie remained on the bench, content in her own space and world, contemplating her life as the light reflected on the still water in front of her. Here, right now, time held little meaning for her: it was either light or dark, sleep or run, eat when she wanted, and being with Peter when she chose.
The following day the sky was clear and the sun bright, the air cool and still. Abbie decided to repeat her run in the morning, again taking her time over the ten miles. The waves gently lapped the shore line along the entire beach, which was again deserted. She was glad she wouldn’t be disturbed and as she today planned to leave her body for some time.
Today, somehow the run felt easier to her than the day before, her leg muscles not protesting. Running steadily, she focused her mind on her consciousness and leaving her physical self behind.
Whether it was due to being in a different and unfamiliar place she wasn’t, but at first, her mind
strayed several times, and she had to think hard and focus on what she wanted to achieve.
Eventually her determination paid off and she found herself rising gently, high up to a brightness that enveloped everything ahead of her.
She glanced down and saw the silver shining cord that connected these two different parts of her together, her spirit and her bodily self, running below over the sands. She wondered if anyone saw her right now, could they suspect anything different was going on?
Seeing Peter was again a joy, to have found this way to remain in contact with him, to be able to be with her true love was wonderful and she could never really comprehend it. She thought of it purely as a gift.
Out of her physical self, Abbie had a sense of freedom that thrilled her, it was peaceful and yet exhilarating at the same time. The time they were together, the embraces they shared were the most comfortable place in the world for her, their spirits seemingly resting together.
Peter was always glad she came to him, and she was convinced of his love beyond any doubt, believing this was why he remained here and did not move on. Somehow though at this meeting, Abbie felt there was heaviness about him that she hadn’t noticed before. There seemed to be a concern, a weight burdening him - was it to do with her? Had she caused this?
For some reason Abbie felt uneasy and unsure about how to approach this, or whether in fact she should, so she said nothing to Peter.
Abbie again noticed other astral beings this time; some were together with others, some were travelling alone and contented, but a few looked desperately sad and lost, and she wondered if Peter ever appeared this way when she was away from him.