by Lucia Franco
Out in the living room, music played in the background as Ben made each shot near the center ring and two more shot glasses waited on the table nearby. Walking over, she grabbed one and tipped it back and handed the other to Ben without saying anything. It burned going down, but it wasn’t as bad this time. She needed to forget, not feel anything. Ben raked his gaze down her body, lingering on her belly that showed from his tied shirt then snapped his eyes back to hers. He gave her a crooked grin, then he slammed it back.
“Let’s go,” he waved at her. “You’re going to play.” Ben hooked an arm around her waist and pulled to her stand in front of him. He stepped closely behind and she shivered at his touch on her stomach. His fingers danced across her naked skin, heating her up. He picked up her hand and positioned the dart between her fingers.
“Look at the center,” he whispered near her neck. “Focus on it. Take a deep breath and throw it. It’s very easy.”
Alyssa swallowed hard. The stubble on his jaw grazed her face causing goose bumps to coat her skin. Brushing it off, she followed Ben’s directions and flung the dart … where it bounced off the wall and hit the floor. Alyssa giggled and Ben gave her hip a squeeze.
“You weren’t even close!” Ben joked. “And it didn’t even stick to the wall,” he said, bending down to pick up the dart with a smile. “Try it again, this time put a little oomph into it and throw harder.” He handed her three darts. She bit her lip and nodded.
She launched all the darts one after another. This time they stuck to the wall, but not even close to the board. Ben tried to stifle a laugh, but his face gave it away and she found herself laughing.
His eyes lit up. “I don’t understand how you are so far from the target.”
“I told you I have no aim!” she laughed.
“But you’re not even close to the board,” he said in astonishment. Ben grabbed the darts, closed his eyes and shot all three off hitting the board.
“Show off.”
He grinned and her eyes found his lip ring again. The second shot was beginning to hit and she liked the feeling it gave her.
“Every time you miss, you have to take a shot. That should make you learn real quick.”
“Or I’ll just get really drunk and my aim will be even worse.”
“I can’t imagine it could get any worse.”
Pursing her lips together, she grabbed the darts and focused on the colors of the board. She shot each one, her body angling forward from the power she added to the throw, this time hitting closer to the board. Ben picked up the darts and walked behind her. He wrapped an arm around her waist and yanked her to his chest. He didn’t let go, just held her tight and she could feel the hardness of his body pressed against her. Her heart was pumping faster, heat coursing through her body when he picked up her hand, put the dart in it and held on. He pulled back, her hand going with his and flung it hard. She leaned forward from the force and her hips pressed into Ben’s. His hand flattened on her belly, his fingers searing her skin as the tip of his finger dipped into the lip of her shorts. Ben didn’t probe, just left it there.
“Next time you miss, you take a shot.” She rolled her bottom lip and nodded.
Naturally, Alyssa missed.
“I’m determined to get this,” she huffed as Ben poured more tequila. She brought it to her lips and paused. “This isn’t fair. You never miss!”
He smirked. “I’ll take one with you each time.”
“Good,” she said and downed the shot. Three shots and they were hitting her all at once. Maybe she should have eaten, but she hadn’t had much of an appetite since everything happened, so it didn’t cross her mind.
Over the next hour, each time Ben helped Alyssa, he touched her somewhere. Her body was warming up and she felt herself leaning into him more. Instead of taking shots each time she missed, they turned it into a game and whoever lost had to drink. She’d finally won one game but then lost two other. Tequila infused her blood stream and she didn’t have a care in the world. Ben made her laugh with his comments and she was having a blast. It was just what she needed.
Alyssa could feel Ben’s gaze on her many times and even though she shouldn’t like it, she found herself becoming more aroused. The tequila made her giggly and turned on.
“Okay. No more darts. Let’s arm wrestle,” she slurred. “I’m just getting worse by the second.”
Ben gave her a droll stare and pulled out a cigarette. “I’ll beat you in two seconds flat.”
“You know,” she propped her hands on her hips, “you’re supposed to let me win.”
“Because you’re a girl? That’s not how it works in the real world, baby. When you want something you gotta take it.”
She was pretty drunk and didn’t acknowledge his baby comment. Alyssa pulled out a chair and sat down with her arm poised and ready. Ben shrugged and sat down, placing his cigarette in the ashtray.
“You ready to lose?” she taunted. A slow smile spread across his face and she stared at his lip ring, again. That thing was sexy as hell. Her cheeks flushed when Ben cupped her hand with his tightly and met his eyes. Glossy, slightly pink with heavy eyelids. She probably had the same look going on.
“On the count of three.” She nodded.
“One … two … three.”
That’s all it took for Ben to win. Three seconds. “Hey! I wasn’t ready!” she lied, and he laughed. He took another puff of his cigarette and put it down. Alyssa swiped it and took a puff herself. She wasn’t a smoker, but she wasn’t a tequila drinker either. Inhaling, the smoke made her instantly light headed. She wasn’t expecting that. It heightened her drunk high and she became really intoxicated.
“Welllll …” she said. “I think I’m high. And really drunk.”
“From a cigarette?”
Alyssa didn’t know why, but she found his comment really funny and chuckled. “Okay. One more time, but I get to use two hands.”
His mouth dropped open. “That’s cheating!”
“You gotta give me something!”
“Fine. One game and you get two hands. If you don’t win, two more shots.”
They tasted like water at this point. “Oh! You are so bad,” she slurred.
“You have no idea, baby. Now let’s do this.” Ben put his hand up and she cupped it with both hands. Looking him dead in the eyes, she said, “On my count.” He nodded. “One … two … three …”
Alyssa put everything into winning, and she actually was. Ben’s other hand was gripping the table, his knuckles were turning white. She started slipping off the chair as she leaned to the side and tried to pull his hand down. Just when she was about to hit the table, he swung to the other side and pressed her hand down and won. She fell off the chair and came face to face with his carpet.
“Oh my Goddd,” she laughed from the ground.
“You’re a mess,” Ben said, bending down and hooking an arm around her waist.
“A hot mess is the correct term.” He lifted her up but she forgot to use her legs and fell back down. She was a hot mess for sure.
“Now I know what that saying means.”
“What saying?” he asked, picking her up and bringing her back to his chest. He turned and propped her up against the wall using his body to hold her up as he poured another shot on the table next to them. Ben’s body felt incredibly good against hers and she almost sighed as she pressed into him.
“One tequila, two tequila, three tequila floor.”
“That really does apply to you,” he joked.
She turned around, but Ben didn’t move or give her space. He stayed in the same position and felt every outline of his hard body. Her lips parted when she came face to face with him. Chest to hips were pressed together and she had a strong urge to pull that lip of his into her mouth.
Ben never took his eyes off of her as he pinched his cigarette between fingers and took a drag. He blew the smoke out from the corner of his mouth then brought the cigarette to her lips. She parted her lips
more and he slipped it in. She didn’t know why, but she found the move unbelievably hot. She inhaled and blew it out, purposely hitting his face and sighed as she did. In this moment, she was wet with desire for Ben.
Tilting his head to the side, he said quietly, “Who knew you were so much fun, Alyssa?”
She shrugged with a coy smile and reached for the shot glass. She drank half of it and gave the other half to Ben.
He shook his head. “Take it all.”
“I’m really drunk.”
“So am I, but I always finish what I start.” Why did that sound so hot to her? His eyes were dark and she found herself falling into them. She tipped the shot back and he gestured to the other one.
“No more. You take that one. I can’t feel my legs.” Ben grinned and drank it.
“You’re really drunk and can’t feel your legs … I’m thinking we’re gonna have a slumber party,” he winked.
“I’m a thinkin’ you’re right,” she breathed. It was stupid to drive in this condition and she wasn’t going to take a chance.
Alyssa was achieving her goal for the night. No stress, no tears, no feeling until Ben asked, “Can’t imagine lover boy knows you’re here.”
She looked away. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You just want to forget it, right?” She looked back at Ben and nodded. “And let me guess, you want me to make you forget everything, right?”
She didn’t answer his question because in that moment, she did want that.
“You know about Jace, right?”
He nodded, but no sympathy was shown. “It’s unfortunate.”
“Yeah.”
Ben licked his lips and she watched, mesmerized by his lip ring and movement. He threaded his fingers through the back of her head and tipped her face to meet his. He was so close that she could smell the tequila coming off his breath.
Closing the distance, Ben didn’t hesitate when he kissed her. And she let him because the truth was she had wanted to kiss him since she met him.
Ben’s kisses were different. He didn’t ask with his touch, he took and demanded. He thrust his tongue into her mouth and kissed her hard. Alyssa kissed him back with the same intensity, tasting the tequila on him. He tugged on her hair and she went to wrap her arms around his neck, but he stopped her and pushed them against the wall.
Reaching down, Ben gripped her thighs and picked her up. He shoved her back into the wall. She wrapped her legs around his waist, locking her ankles and he rolled his hips into her sex. Alyssa moaned. She became even wetter from the feel of his jeans pushing on her. His touch wasn’t light and she liked that. He was rough with his kisses and his abrasive fingers kneaded her hips. She couldn’t process it from the liquor hitting her hard. It was like he was touching her everywhere all at once, her body was climbing and she wanted more. His fingers slid around her hips and down to her wetness. Ben didn’t hesitate and he pushed in. She clenched around him from the intrusion, both liking it but hurting from it too. Her back bowed and broke the kiss.
“Ow.” Ben pulled his fingers out and put them in his mouth, his eyes never leaving hers.
“I had a feeling you would taste like this,” he whispered.
Heart racing, she panted. “Like what?”
“Like a juicy sweet peach.” Her cheeks flushed, burning from his forwardness. It was a good thing she didn’t have panties to put on after the shower because they would be soaked right now. A slow grin danced across his face. Before she could process what was happening, Ben pulled her off the wall and had her in his room and on his bed in seconds. He licked her neck, biting the curve of her shoulder and she shivered. His hands went to her breasts and he groaned pushing his hips back and forth into her. Her head was spinning. Alyssa was wound up and turned on, and as much as her body was on fire and beginning for release, she wasn’t planning on having sex tonight. Her hands found his chest, as his mouth found hers again. Ben did have a way with his rough kisses and she kissed him back again. Her legs tightened around his waist and he pushed his cock into her again. She tried to stifle her moans, but she failed. Ben’s hand slid to the outside of her thigh where the boxer shorts slid up. He gripped her hard then reared back and slapped that spot. Alyssa jumped from the shocking sting. Before she could complain, he rubbed it in circles, heating it up and then pulled back and slapped her in the same spot, this time pressing his erection into her. It was a feeling she’d never felt, both pain and pleasure and despite her body reacting to it, she needed to stop it.
Alyssa brought her hands to his chest to stop Ben. She broke the kiss and turned her head to the side, breathing heavily. Ben grabbed both wrists and placed them above her head.
“I …” she breathed, seeing triple of Ben. “I think we should stop.”
“I’ll be the one to decide.”
“No, I don’t want to.”
“You don’t get to work me up only to say stop.” He kissed her again, and she lost her train of thought. Her wrists were pinned to the bed as he used his other hand to slip into her boxers. She couldn’t close her legs since Ben was on top of her, and he ran his fingers along her sex. He broke the kiss and pulled back with a massive grin. He pressed his wet fingers to her lips and painted them with her wetness.
“You still going to tell me to stop, because I’m pretty sure your body wants me.” Then he kissed her lips, sucking them into his mouth and licking the evidence of her arousal off.
“I don’t …” she said between kisses, and squirmed under him.
“Shhh … you want this,” he insisted.
“I … no … don’t …”
“Yes, you do,” He found her sex again and thrust two fingers inside. Her hips came off the bed and her back arched.
“Ben–” He kissed her to shut her up as his fingers pumped in and out. She whimpered not from pleasure.
“See? I knew you’d like it.”
“It hurts …” His thumb circled her clit. “No …” Why did she have to drink so much? She was having trouble forming words. “Stop …” Her heart pounded and the room spun, she wanted him to stop but he wouldn’t.
Ben added more pressure to her wrists while his other one kept going down below. They burned from his hold as she struggled to move. She didn’t want this and yet she felt an orgasm climbing. He was confusing her moans of pain with pleasure and all she wanted was to stop it from happening.
Alyssa opened her eyes as wide as she could and tried to sober up. She stared up at the ceiling and said, “Ben. Stop.”
But he ignored her and kept his torment on her body. He bit down on her neck, licking it and then biting again. Her blood was rising, the impending orgasm getting closer and she wanted it to stop.
“I said stop,” she begged.
“I know you want this, baby. You’ve wanted my dick inside that sweet pussy of yours ever since we met.”
She squeezed her eyes shut fighting off the orgasm. “I … I …” she couldn’t get the words out as her release tore through, hitting her so hard she shuddered under Ben. She was motionless, in shock over the way her body reacted to his touch even though she desperately did not want it. How was it possible that she orgasmed the way she just did? She felt dirty, emotionless.
Disgusting.
“Yeah … That’s it. I knew you wanted it. Give it to me,” he muttered near her ear. Ben let go of her wrists and stood on his knees as she stared at the ceiling astonished. She heard a zipper, saw a blur of material … felt her body jerk, but nothing was processing. Her body was shutting down, her eyes grew heavy and she was sinking away.
And then she felt pressure between her legs and her arms went flying. Something wasn’t right, she just didn’t know what, only that she needed to stop it. Too much tequila. Her mind faded, darkness taking her under, as Ben grabbed her wrists again and pinned them down by the sides of her head, all the while a dull pressure built and built down below and she was powerless to stop it.
“Shhh … You want this.”
Alyssa’s head pounded when she woke up. She was disoriented and puzzled. What the hell happened last night? It was like a jack hammer was going off inside her head. She was still drunk and she was nauseous to the core. She sat up too quickly and the room spun, so she lay back down trying to fight off the bile rising to her throat. She had to work this afternoon but had no idea what time it was and looked around for a clock. The red light from the cable box said 6:00 am and she decided she was going back to bed.
Alyssa groaned and turned over to see a sleeping Ben and smiled. He was passed out. Last night had been fun, playing darts and trying to arm wrestle him. As she watched him sleep, confusion set in … what happened after arm wrestling? Her head pounded even more trying to remember how they ended up in bed. She remembered falling … and him kissing her and her kissing him back, but the rest was a complete blank. It was the first time she blacked out and truly had no idea what happened.
Something about last night wasn’t sitting right in her gut. Maybe it was the after effects from the bottle of tequila she chugged with Ben? She shuffled her legs into a comfortable position and felt a sting between her thighs. She paused, wondering why that happened. She moved her legs again seeing if the sting was still there … and sure enough, it was. Did they have sex last night? No … her clothes were still on and even though she lusted after Ben when they first met, she didn’t want to sleep with him. She didn’t like him like that, especially after being with Johnny. Despite his refusal to speak to her, Johnny owned her heart completely. He just didn’t know it.
Alyssa shrugged, going back to sleep deciding that she would think about it later.
The burial had been today.
Five days after Jace died. Five days after he watched Jace be taken off life support.
Watching your best friend be lowered six feet into the ground did shit to John’s head.
It fucked him up pretty badly.
It had also been five days since he’d spoken to Alyssa.
When she showed up at the funeral, he couldn’t bring himself to utter a word to her. He looked at her for a brief moment, the dark circles under her puffy eyes were pronounced and she looked very pale. He wanted to go to her, but he didn’t have an ounce of energy left in his body. He was cemented in the chair. He kept his eyes locked on the coffin for the remainder of the service. It was better that way.