by Lucia Franco
Immediately, Alyssa felt like an utter fool for coming to John’s house. Her heart sank into her stomach. She hadn’t even remembered the MS, she’d only been thinking of herself. It was completely selfish of her.
“I’m so sorry, Mrs. Jackson! I should leave. I apologize for coming here like this.” Alyssa grabbed her jacket and slipped it on, but before she could take another step, Clark stopped her.
“Now you listen here, young lady. We’re not about to let you leave and go back to that boy. You’re here and we’re going to figure this out.”
“But–”
“No butt’s about it,” Diane said. “I’m completely fine. I’ve been on medication and doing well. Sometimes I have flair-ups, but it’s manageable.”
Alyssa sighed. She really didn’t want to leave. She actually felt safe under their roof. She was so alone inside, no mother to confide in, no father for her unborn child and no education to fall back on. What the hell was she supposed to do?
Between her hormones and everything that had been going on, she was due for a good cry. She just wished it hadn’t been in front of John’s parents.
Rinsing off her hands, Alyssa grabbed the towel and dried them. She had a lot to figure out, but thankfully she had someone to talk to about it for once.
Opening the bathroom door, she went back to the kitchen where Diane and Clark were chatting. “We have some ideas, Alyssa.”
Clark spoke first. “You can stay in John’s room for as long as you like. We’re not expecting him back, only for small breaks since he’ll be stationed somewhere else.”
Alyssa’s shoulders dropped. As happy as she was for John, she missed him dearly. The irony of the situation was not lost. Funny how you don’t realize what you have until it’s gone, not that John was truly hers … but in a sense he was.
“In order for that to happen you really need go to the police and report what’s been going on. We won’t stand by and watch Ben get away with what he’s done to you.”
Alyssa exhaled a heavy breath. Pressure was growing on her chest. “I’ll be there with you, honey,” Diane said, grabbing her hand, comforting her. “I’ll be by your side so you don’t have anything to worry about. Otherwise you’ll be living in fear everyday of your life and I’m sure that’s not something you want for your baby?”
“I don’t.”
Diane’s lips flattened. “Then it needs to be done, now.”
Alyssa’s heart stopped. “Right now?”
Diane nodded. She may be small, but she wasn’t one to argue with.
“We have one last little issue. When is John going to find out about all of this?”
Alyssa shrugged her shoulders. She didn’t have an answer for that question yet. “I don’t know, but I’ll tell him … Just not yet. Okay?”
Alyssa stared quietly out of the car window as they made their way home. Each tree passing by was a blur, much like today.
She’d stripped down for the female officer to take photos since there were old welts on her legs. The officer asked about doing an internal exam, even insisted on one, but Alyssa refused it. That damage was already done and she didn’t think anything would show at this point anyway.
It was unnerving, but she had no choice. Alyssa was an emotional wreck. Her heart was racing the entire time. Rubbing her belly, Alyssa knew she’d made the right choice. No good could come out of an abusive relationship even when the other half swears of change. Once a hitter, always a hitter. The police officer even commended her for walking away so early on.
Alyssa gave a lengthy statement and proceeded with pressing charges. She learned that Ben would be charged with Felony Domestic Violence, a crime that could be served for up to three years along with a fine. She prayed Ben would get the maximum sentence allowed. That would be three years of freedom for her, but then what would she do after three years? Alyssa sighed inwardly. Of course that would only happen once they appeared before a court.
“Alyssa?” Clark said.
She sat up higher. “Yes?”
“Tomorrow we’ll call down to the police station to get an update. Once we know for sure Ben’s been arrested, we’ll go and get all of your belongings. For now you can use whatever we have. Sound good?”
“Yes. Thank you … For everything.”
“You’re welcome. We’re happy you came to us.”
Alyssa smiled. “So am I.”
Jesus. Alyssa felt her emotions climbing again. What was wrong with her? She needed to get a handle on things but she was so thankful and appreciative that she couldn’t help herself.
Today was the first day of her new life. The scars would always be there, but she was going to do her best to heal the wounds on her heart and make a fresh start.
Rolling over to her other side trying to find a comfortable position, Alyssa inhaled and felt John all around her. His scent still lingered on the hunter green sheets after two months of him being gone. It gave her a sense of comfort and brought her peace. She just wished he was actually there. She missed the touch of his hand, the way he held her. Her heart cried for him on a daily basis.
Last night after dinner, Alyssa worked up the courage to ask why John hadn’t come home. She learned that his MOS training, which meant job, had lasted longer than expected. Some recruits went thirty days, others went six months. It just depended on his job, which she remembered was aviation.
Two days had passed since they’d gone to the police station. Clark confirmed Ben’s arrest so she was going back to his house to gather all her stuff, which wasn’t much, and say goodbye to that miserable place. Afterwards, she would head down to Roxie’s and ask for her position back.
Then she would text Johnny.
Her nerves were climbing by the minute just thinking about talking to him. Two months ago, she told him not to call in fear of Ben finding out, and thankfully he hadn’t. But things were different now, even more complicated, and she wasn’t sure how to start the conversation.
Getting out of bed, Diane offered to lend her car so she could head over to Roxie’s. On the way back, she would stop at Ben’s quickly and pick up her stuff.
Alyssa smiled. That was going to be her incentive today—texting Johnny.
Pulling up to Ben’s house left a sick feeling in her stomach. It churned, making her nauseous. It was a good thing she had skipped breakfast otherwise it would be coming up. Taking a deep breath, she opened the car door and stepped out to an empty driveway. She grabbed her keys and made her way to the front door.
As she slid the key into the door, her heart hammered in her throat. She paused. Alyssa placed her ear to the door, swearing she heard a sound. She waited for a moment then turned the key. Her nerves were seriously getting to her. Paranoia was a bitch.
Before she could pull they key out, the door was yanked opened and she nearly fell inside. A meaty hand wrapped around her right arm, pulled her up then shoved her to the wall. Her head bounced against it and she recoiled, wincing in pain.
“Thought you could get away from me? Thought you could steal my son and take off?” He breathed in her face. The disgusting odor of cigarettes and beer was present on his breath and it made her sick. Ben’s fist came at her and punched the wall by her head. She jumped, the crackling sound of drywall frightening her as it dusted on to her shoulder and sprinkled the ground.
Unable to catch her breath, Alyssa was panting. “I … I …” How was he home? He shouldn’t have been home!
“You got another thing coming if you think you can take off so easily. That’s my kid, you bitch.”
“It may not be yours,” she spat out, finding the courage deep down.
Ben pulled back slowly, but he left the death grip on her arm. Realization in his dull gray eyes formed. “I had a feeling that pansy fucked you too. You were so easy to get in bed. All I did was grin and you opened your legs for me, just like that one girlfriend of his.”
“So you did take his girl.”
“I didn’t take anything when she willingly gave it
to me. Just like you did that first time with you. It was too easy. You were no challenge after a few shots of tequila.”
“You’re a liar,” she snarled. “Do you have some sick obsession with him and want what he has?” Where was this courage coming from?
Realization dawned on her. “That … night,” she whispered. “I blacked out but woke up with an ache. I had a feeling something happened but I would’ve never thought …”
“All I had to do was work you up real good and slide right in. So simple … You were a good fuck until you had to get pregnant and fat—“
“I’m not fat!” Alyssa yelled, and then spit in his face. Digging deep, she shoved Ben away from her. He stumbled back but quickly found his footing. She couldn’t believe her ears.
A sneer spread across his face and her heart dropped into he r stomach.
His nails dug into her skin and she winched. Ben noticed her pain and dug deeper. “This is for thinking you can get rid of me so fast,” he punched her side so hard she felt a crack and lost her breath. Her heart lodged in her throat. For a split second Alyssa was glad it was her ribs that Ben hit and not her stomach. Her ribs might fracture, even break, but her baby could be saved.
Alyssa crumbled, her legs giving out, but Ben dragged her back up. She couldn’t even cry. The pain was so intense it left her speechless.
“This is for dragging me along thinking it was my kid.” He backhanded her across the face and she tasted blood in her mouth. “This is for having me arrested, you fucking whore.” The burning sting on the other side of her face was from Ben backhanding her again. “And this is for screwing up my life,” he roared, before swinging his fist around and punching Alyssa in the temple.
Ben hit her so hard her vision blurred. A dirty boot came at her legs, and wailing to her arms with his dirty fists. She couldn’t fight his abuse off so she curled into a ball to protect her stomach. Ben picked her up by her hair and she cried out, reaching for his wrist hoping he’d release the pressure on her head. Her feet shuffling across the worn carpet as he dragged her into his room and threw her to the ground. Alyssa looked over her shoulder, her hair matting her tear stained face. Ben slammed the door shut, locking it behind him before he stalked over to her.
One thought crossed her mind before her eyes closed, please let my baby be okay.
Low, hushed voices caused Alyssa to stir. Her face was pounding, her eyes swollen and she groaned in pain. A beeping sound replayed in the background, one that she would normally find annoying but didn’t seem to care at that moment.
Confusion swirled in her head, and the pain it caused was severe. Where was she?
Her hand was enveloped between two others. She moved her fingers trying to get a feel of who it was, but it was a struggle. As she tried to open her eyes, she heard, “Shhh …” and relaxed immediately. Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew that voice and knew she was safe, so she drifted back to sleep.
Alyssa took a deep breath and exhaled, opening her eyes. The bright florescent lights nearly blinded her dry eyes. Turning her head, she spotted a dirty blonde buzzed head.
Johnny? His clothes were rumpled and his back was to her as he rested his head on the mattress with the rest of his body in a chair. He was sleeping and holding her hand at the same time.
Confused, Alyssa took in her surroundings. IV’s were hooked up to the crest of her elbows, gauze bandages wrapped haphazardly on her arms.
How in the …
Alyssa gasped so deeply that her lungs burned. Her baby!
Immediately, she reached for her stomach shuffling the blankets off of her and lifting her hospital gown, bearing her stomach. Her heart was in her throat, tears clogged her eyes.
Please … please …
Alyssa ran her hands over her stretched skin but found no sign of bruising. Thank you, Lord. She rubbed her stomach in circles, trying to comfort her baby. Her emotions took over, her jaw burning as it shook.
Alyssa’s head lulled back when hot tears began streaming down her cheeks. Covering her face with her hands, she cried silent tears in the quiet hospital room. She thanked God she was okay, but prayed that her baby was as well.
She needed to buzz for a doctor.
Suddenly, it was all too much. The past and present slammed into her and she broke down. Her chest ached from holding everything in, from the abuse she was dealt, from the fear she lived in, from her mother rejecting her and everything that had happened since moving to South Fork.
Her life was one giant cluster fuck.
John knew the moment Alyssa woke. He waited for her to move to say something, but instead he felt her panic immediately. She shuffled the bed sheets around and he listened to her tears as her heartache became his pain.
Sitting up, he reached for her hand. Bringing it to his mouth, his kissed the top of it. “Sweetheart, don’t cry. It’s okay. The baby is okay.”
Alyssa paused and looked in his eyes.
“The doctor said the baby is okay. He wasn’t hurt.”
That should’ve been happy news for Alyssa, but she only cried harder. He thought that would make her happy and didn’t understand why she was even more upset. She turned over onto her right, trying to curl into a fetal position. As she did, she gasped.
“Shit, that hurts.” She sputtered.
“Your ribs are fractured.”
“Figures,” her voice cracked. “Ben nailed me in the ribs.”
John quickly stood, kicking the chair back and his jaw locked. That son of a bitch was going to die. One way or another.
“I’ll kill him,” John mumbled lowly, but Alyssa heard it.
“Johnny …” she said, reaching for him. Her face was swollen, not only from Ben’s temperament, but from crying too. “He’s not worth it.”
“He’s not going to get away with what he did.”
Alyssa responded with sad eyes. “He won’t. I promise.” Alyssa squeezed his hand, and he reciprocated. “Johnny … what are you doing here? I thought you were training.”
John crouched down and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. His knuckles grazed her jaw and he gently said, “That’s not for you to worry about. All that matters is that I’m here.”
“But I don’t want you to be kicked out. Please tell me that’s not what happened.”
The fact that she was concerned about his placement moved him. “I didn’t. I took an emergency leave.”
Alyssa released a heavy breath and nodded. “Okay. Can you call a doctor in, please? I’d like to speak to him more about the baby.”
“Of course …” John paused, weighing out his words. “Alyssa, we have a lot to talk about.” He gave a resigned sigh. “We seem to always have a lot to talk about.”
She averted her gaze. “I know,” and plopped her head back onto the pillow. She needed John in more ways than one. “Wait. Is my mom here?” she asked hopefully.
John’s lips formed a thin, flat line. “No, honey, I’m sorry. She didn’t come.”
Her shoulders sagged and she nodded to herself. Was she such a disappointment?
John was back in a few short minutes with a man who looked way too young to be a doctor. His hair was slicked back, nearly black and his eyes were the deepest darkest brown. He was of medium height wearing green scrubs under a white lab coat.
“Hello, Ms. Winters,” he said, holding a bunch of folders to his chest. “I’m glad to see you’re awake and talking. I’m Dr. Cahill.”
“Hi.”
“We did an ultrasound the moment you came in and have monitored the heartbeat the entire time. You’re very lucky the baby is thriving considering the state you arrived in,” he dropped his chin to his chest, one brow rising.
Alyssa didn’t remember being transported to the hospital. She didn’t remember much at all. Tears rimmed her eyes as she said, “Thank you,” bringing her knees up.
Dr. Cahill nodded his head. “That being said, you have quite a few fractured ribs. There are contusions on your head and around
your body. Your recovery is going to take time and there will be some discoloration during the process. Other than that, you should heal just fine. I’m putting you on bed rest until your ribs are healed.”
Walking over, he placed the folders on the rolling table next to her, leaned over and examined her face. His fingers pressed on her temples and around her eyes. Between the light and pressure he was applying, it was causing a throb in the back of her head. “Lift your gown, please,” he requested.
Lifting her gown to bear her stomach, the doctor pressed three fingers to her ribs and searing pain ricocheted through her body. She cinched her eyes shut and struggled for breath as she pulled away. How had she not felt this searing pain when she woke up before?
Probably because she was too frantic to feel anything.
The doctor reached around to her other side and followed the same motions as before. She felt no pain. Pulling her gown down, Dr. Cahill removed his gloves.
“Like I said fractured ribs. There’s nothing we can do for those so you just need to take it easy.”
“She will,” John butted in.
“You’ll need to follow up with your OB/GYN once you’re released. It’s imperative. Do you understand?” she felt like he was ridiculing her.
“I do.”
“Good.” Dr. Cahill grabbed his files and paused. “You’re very lucky, Mrs. Winters. If you need anything, page the nurses’ station and they’ll call me. If all goes well, you should be able to leave in a day.” He gave her a tight, firm smile and left.
The door closed with a swish. John’s eyes connected with Alyssa’s as he walked back over to her.
“How long are you here for?” she asked.
“Not long, just three more days. I’m leaving Sunday night.” Sitting down, John leaned over and rested his elbows on his knees. His hands were clasped together as he stared at the ground. “Why didn’t you come to me?”
The disappointment in his crackling voice hurt to hear. Alyssa turned her head away and stared at the closed drapes. “Because I couldn’t. I didn’t have a choice.” she answered quietly.
“We always have a choice, Alyssa.”
“Not always.”