by Dante King
“Good to see new blood,” Ceelz told Xora. She nodded back at a group of students trying to balance a cornucopia between them, pouring various smoky chemicals into the horn. “I’ve got to go. They’re about to cause another incident…”
“Sure thing,” Xora said, but the tall, green-skinned demoness had already moved past us. Ceelz grabbed the horn right before it tipped, some of the liquid splashing on the floor. It seethed across the tiles like water splashed on a hot grill, leaving scorch marks everywhere. “Great. The janitor’s gonna have a field day with that…”
My stomach gave another one of those bone-deep rumbles. I’d just used my powers shaking Ceelz’s hand, and it turned out matching the strength of a tough woman like that drained my demonic energy considerably. More than even redecorating Maddie’s rooms had…
A worrying thought occurred to me. “Hey, Mareth?”
The succubus had been conferring with Xora in low tones a few steps away—I figured they were discussing which wing to send us to next. She glanced up, her face brightening. “Yeah?”
“The subspace,” I said, picturing the living room I’d built with its roaring fireplace. “If I start running low on demonic energy, nothing bad happens to it, right? Like, it stays up even if I’m tapped dry?” My voice picked up a nervous energy the more I spoke. “I’ve got a live human in there right now. I’d hate for anything to happen to her…”
“It should be fine,” Mareth assured me. A mischievous look entered her eyes. “If you’re worried, though, we could grab a snack. This is the school with all the food, after all. Right, Xora?”
For a moment, Xora looked pissed at the suggestion. Then some knowledge passed between them, carried in a look, and the rusalka smiled. “Absolutely.”
Well, why not? I could use a little Gluttony myself, I thought. Shit, I’m famished all of a sudden…
Xora and Mareth led us to a room at the far end of the hall. Unlike the rest, there were no students in here cooking meals or mixing potions. It felt almost sedate in comparison. Three tables had been arranged into the shape of a ‘U’, and on them were plates of cooling food.
“These dishes were designed by demons in training for their latest exam,” Xora explained, gesturing across the table of food. “They’ve already been judged, so they were set to be thrown away shortly. Try whatever you like.”
An obvious barb sat in the middle of those words, but I was too hungry to care. My stomach felt like an empty sack, dangerously in need of filling, and each plate of food looked more inviting than the last. My eyes settled on a devildog: a pastry made of two long pieces of chocolate cake with whipped cream in the middle. They’d been one of my favorite treats ever since I was a kid, and I had to have it.
Before Xora or Mareth could warn me, I ate half the treat in a single bite. The rich, creamy goodness of the filling exploded in my mouth, along with the darker tang of the chocolate. I let out a very unmanly moan as I chewed, more than a little surprised to feel some kind of savory flakes suspended inside of the cream. Coconut?
“That’s amazing,” I groaned, wiping the side of my mouth. “Holy shit, if this is what your students are capable of, I can’t wait to sample what your chefs can do…”
Both Xora and Mareth stared at me like I’d grown a second head.
“What?” I asked, polishing off the devildog with another bite. “Whoo, that’s got a kick to it, doesn’t it? Spicy and sweet…”
“I can’t believe you managed to eat the whole thing,” Xora said, amazed. “That pastry’s enchanted with a high-level pyromancy spell, Luke.”
“I guess we know who likes it spicy,” Mareth giggled behind her fingertips. “Damn, Luke!”
I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing. “That wasn’t spicy,” I said, wiping my brow. “Not that spicy, at least—I’ve had worse—”
A burp wormed its way up from my throat. I slammed a hand over my mouth to stifle it at the last moment, and flames shot from the corners of my mouth. Christina let out a little yelp and looked around, evidently searching for a fire extinguisher.
“Wow,” I said, my eyes watering as I started to laugh.
“So this is how I learn you’ve got a high level affinity for pyromancy on top of everything else,” Xora said, pouting spectacularly. “I was so hoping to prank you…”
“My bad,” I said. “Wait, what would’ve happened to me there if I didn’t have high-level pyromancy skill?”
“Oh, nothing the Academy’s infirmary couldn’t fix,” Xora told me, her eyes gleaming mischievously. “Our medical demons can do the most interesting things with skin grafts these days…”
I swallowed hard. If that’s what passes for a ‘prank’ among demons, I thought, then I better watch out when one actually wants to put one over on me...
Xora’s face softened. “It is what it is,” the rusalka said. “Clearly I’m just going to have to try harder.” She examined the rest of the table with a naughty look. “Want to sample any more dishes, or are you done?”
After what had happened with the devildog, I didn’t feel like taking chances. Besides, it had hit the spot—I felt much better. “Nah, that’s cool,” I said, stepping away from the table. “Christina?”
“Working on my figure,” Christina said quickly. I could tell she was hungry, too, but she was not about to let Mareth and Xora see her pig out. Also she obviously wanted to see the rest of the schools.
So did I. “Lead the way.”
Xora led us through a door at the back of the Gluttony School, and we stepped back in time.
I don’t know why it surprised me so much. Maybe it was because, after the big, modern entrance hall and the clean fixtures of the Gluttony school, I’d started thinking of the Infernal Academy as...well, as an Academy. A college. Sure, a college for hot demons and devils, but with recognizable rules and structures. Lecture halls, cafeterias, sororities—that kind of thing.
All that got blown to hell as we stepped into the next wing of the Academy.
Chapter 13
A black sky stretched above our heads, roiling with purple clouds. In front of us lay a massive stone plateau, suspended above a great dark vortex far beneath. Thick rusted chains dropped from the platform down into the darkness, with smaller chains connecting the plateau to various floating islands by means of narrow, swinging bridges.
“Oh, wow!” Christina’s face lit up as our feet touched stone. Her wings flapped excitedly across her back. “I’ve heard of this place—or at least, I think I have. This is the Arena!”
Xora gave the blonde a bewildered look. “So astute,” the rusalka murmured, as if she’d never expected a human to have that kind of knowledge. I thought of the books in Latin in Christina’s study and chuckled. “You’re correct, demoness. This the School of Wrath, where the high and mighty ideals of theory meet the blood and bone of practice.”
“This is where the fights happen,” Christina said, nudging me. A look of pure euphoria shone in her eyes, almost like when the two of us were about to get down and dirty. “Demons beat the shit out of each other—it’s supposed to teach you how to deal with combat in the real world.”
“And to prepare for the day of Judgement,” Xora intoned solemnly.
Mareth snorted. “Day of Judgement? You don’t really believe in all that, do you, Xora?”
The rusalka looked extremely put out by Mareth’s questioning. “Of course I do,” she said in a haughty tone. “One day will come the summons from below. All demons will invade the world of the living, and the final battle for existence will begin.” She grinned widely, showing those needle-like teeth she’d almost sunk into Maddie’s flesh. “I, for one, do not wish to be caught flat-footed on that day, succubus.”
Mareth gave the rusalka a dubious look. “Most of us aren’t quite as hardcore as Xora here,” the succubus explained, putting a hand on my shoulder. “The Day of Judgement is just a myth, like Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy and a woman who does anal after she’s married. Noth
ing for you to worry about…”
I wasn’t worried about it. I was, in point of fact, watching the fighting. Most of it seemed to be happening on those far-flung islands connected to the plateau by chain bridges. It didn’t take long to figure out why.
Out in the distance, a purple-skinned imp sent a fireball the size of a building screaming through the void. It soared toward a beautiful succubus, who at the last moment raised her wrist and sent a sheet of ice arching upward in a shower of needles. The two bursts of magic collided, and both competitors dropped to their knees to begin channeling the next assault.
“Magical battles are conducted a safe distance away from spectators,” Xora said, confirming what I already knew. “The further you get from the main plateau, the fewer rules you must follow, as well.”
“People you fight in the real world aren’t going to be following any rules,” I growled, remembering the monstrous looks in the eyes of the demonic student body as they tried to force their way into Maddie’s trunk. “It’s kill or be killed. Dog eat dog.”
“Just so,” Xora said, amused. “Which is why we allow our students to get plenty of practice in. Observe…”
Out on the main plateau, a battle royale had just begun. A large number of demons formed a circle around a smaller few, yelling and chanting with the thrill of battle. Within the ring, demons sparred with vicious-looking edged weapons, their blades covered in blood and gore. A goat-headed monster swung a polearm at one of its fellows, missed, and got a pair of daggers in the lower back from an imp for his trouble. Sensing weakness, the rest of the competitors jumped into the fray, hacking and slashing at the goatman’s body.
“Holy shit,” I groaned, covering my mouth with a hand. My face paled as the demons hacked the goatman to pieces. The weapons they used looked like something out of a video game, but the inhuman shrieks, the entrails, and blood steaming on the ground—all of that was real.
“You seem upset,” Xora teased. “Surely you’ve grown desensitized to such violence by now? After all, we’ve put so much of it in your films, your video games…”
I was still thinking about Maddie. This is what those demons would have done to her if they’d gotten their hands on her.
“Pretty fucking savage,” I grunted, watching as the demons stepped away from what was left of the goat demon. Its horned head lay in the dirt, only strands connecting it to its shredded torso. Beneath that was little more than a puddle of slurry. “This is what you were looking forward to, Christina?”
It was Mareth who figured it out. “Oh shit,” the succubus giggled. “You think he’s actually dead, don’t you?”
Huh?
My confused expression told her everything she needed.
“Hey,” Mareth yelled, cupping her hands around her mouth. “Capras! Get the fuck up!”
The goat demon’s decapitated head shuddered. With an irritated bleat, it blinked—and the hairy head slid back down onto its neck, the wound sealing as if it had never been there. Within moments, the goat’s body stitched itself back together, becoming whole and hearty once again.
“Nice moves,” the goat demon called Capras bleated at the imp. “But the rest of it was a cheap shot!”
The imp laughed and clapped the goat demon on the back. “It’s only because we’re so scared of ya, Capras! You know we’ve got to get you down first if the rest of us have any chance to win…”
“He’s alright,” I muttered, shaking my head as the rest of the demons celebrated. Capras went from the inside of the ring to the periphery—apparently the rule was you left once you were downed. “They didn’t actually kill him…”
Xora laughed. “This is Hell, Luke,” she said, her tail curling around her gorgeous ass. “Of course you cannot be killed here—where would you even go? All injuries incurred within the arena are healed automatically by the demonic wards set up by the School. They hurt, certainly—but it is our hope that pain will train demons to be more cautious when dealing with actual combat.”
“Uh huh,” I said, watching the remaining demons spar with their weapons. “And what happens if a human gets disemboweled in that Arena, Xora? Do I come jumping back up, like everyone else?”
The rusalka paused only a moment—which told me that she wasn’t 100% sure. Had anything other than instant healing ever happened to someone who was hurt in the Arena?
“Of course,” Xora said, crossing her arms beneath her breasts. “You and Christina both. You can try it out now, if you like—we have time.”
Suddenly Christina was at my side, tugging at my robes like a bratty teenager. “Let me do it, Luke,” she said, a manic grin spreading across her demonic face. “I want to get in there and mix it up!”
The thought of Christina lying on the ground, bleeding from a dozen wounds made my stomach turn. “I don’t like that idea,” I said, shaking my head. “I don’t want to see you hurt.”
She met my gaze for a long moment, regarding me evenly. “You did see me back there with Maddie, right?”
“Of course. How could I forget?” Christina had been a thing of beauty then—a terrible beauty, indeed.
“When I waded out into those demons and started smashing in faces, I...I felt something,” she confessed, looking to Mareth and Xora for confirmation. “I don’t know about the other Schools here at the Academy, but I can tell you this: I’m a fighting demon. A combat demon. When it was just you and me standing between that crowd and Maddie, I’d never felt so fucking alive!”
“In that case, you’d be spending a lot of time here,” Xora said, her smile widening. “There’s lots to learn—combat magic, the use of hellspawned weaponry.”
“Lots of just beating the shit out of people, too,” Mareth said with a laugh. “I don’t come down here very often, myself—my specialities lay elsewhere. But I’d love to come see you spar sometime, Christina!”
Christina gave me a hopeful look. “That’s alright with you, right, Luke?”
I looked out over the field of competitors, thinking. Well hell, I thought, we’re going to have some fighting to deal with sooner or later. I’d rather Christina be prepared for it. Plus, she does look pretty hot ripping out my enemy’s throats…
“Yeah,” I said, grabbing a handful of her ass, pulling her closer to me. “I bet you could teach those guys down there a thing or three about kicking ass, babe.”
I’d never seen Christina look so gratified. Her smile was like Christmas morning. “Fuck yes,” she giggled, giving me a kiss on the cheek. “I’m gonna be your badass warrior babe. Don’t worry—when I step out of the arena, I’ll be more than ready to shimmy into some fancy dress and have you parade me on your arm…”
She pressed her body against mine, her teeth teasing my bottom lip. Sensing the two of us were about to spill into full-on making out if she didn’t do something, Xora motioned for us to focus.
“Well, how about you two have a little practice round? I have two students who are also fairly fresh, and I can promise you that they’ll provide you with more than a taste of the School of Wrath.”
Christina and I shared a look. The blonde seemed more than just willing to hop into the ring—she was excited as all hell. I couldn’t help but feel that way a little bit, too. Now that Maddie was safe, and there was a little distance between our previous fight with demons, I could admit how exciting it had been to fight them.
“Sure,” I agreed, watching Christina’s face light up. “Let’s test our mettle.” I wondered if I’d be able to do that trick with the tendrils again, or if it needed more time to recharge.
I thought we’d fight right there, on the big plateau where the rest of the demons sparred, but Xora had other ideas. She led us across a narrow chain bridge toward one of the farthest flung islands, an inky finger of rock floating in the black. I didn’t need her to tell me what that meant—this fight was about to be no holds barred. We’d be able to use magic, in addition to weapons.
No sooner had we crossed over than Xora escorted two dem
ons over the bridge. A big crowd filled in behind them, eager to watch the newbies take on their first fight, but these two were definitely our opponents. I looked them up and down, trying to get a feel for them. A two on two fight, then—hopefully nothing Christina and I couldn’t handle.
“This is Bryan,” Xora said, tapping the back of her hand against the taller man’s chest. “He’s a Rake.”
He was very tall indeed, so much so that he would have fit right at home on an NBA basketball team if he wasn’t so weird-looking. His arms and legs seemed too long for his lanky frame, almost like Slender Man. Only whatever demons they had down here definitely predated Slender, or the rest of the creepypasta characters.
“He doesn’t look like much of a challenge,” Christina whispered. I had to agree: the demon held no weapon, not even a basic one, and he certainly didn’t seem like some sort of arcane sorcerer. Appearances could be deceiving, however—I’d learned that when Maddie showed up locked in the trunk of my car. Any demon could turn on a dime. Even a scrawny one like Bryan was a threat.
The second demon looked more along the lines of what I’d been expecting. Overlapping plates of chitinous armor sheathed his body, making him look like a massive, overgrown bug. He’d brought two swords with him, curved ones, with enough range to slash or stab without having to step close enough to a target to leave himself open for counter attack. In contrast to the rest of him, his face was almost human, which just made him look even creepier.
“Aztomund,” the second demon said, nodding respectfully at me, then Christina. “It will be a pleasure to spar with new recruits.”
“A Rake and a Scarab Demon versus a Mog and a human,” one of the demons in the crowd cackled. “Oh, this is going to be a massacre! Who wants to lay a few coins down?”
More hooting and hollering spilled from the crowd as they got into it, money exchanging hands.
“Don’t let them get you angry,” I warned Christina. With the eyes of so many demons on both of us, I wanted to put on a good show. “Save that rage for Slender Man and Bug Boy.”