He held out a hand to me, and I took it. He pulled me up, and slapped my firmly on the bottom. “Naughty girls need to get cleaned up. Go take a shower.”
“Yes, sir,” I said quietly, and padded off silently to the bathroom. I noticed that, around him, I did everything much more quietly. I was so demure around him, unsure of myself. I felt so different. I felt like this was my true self.
At school, I exuded an air of confidence. I had to, or I would be eaten alive by my own schoolmates. But deep down, I knew that confidence was feigned. I was just as unsure and uncertain of myself as anyone else in that system. Maybe even more so. I felt like I had so much to live up to, to my teachers and my parents both. And I knew it was because of my older sister. She was a genius, she got straight A’s throughout her entire school career, was the team captain on the lacrosse team, and ended up with an academic scholarship to an Ivy League university.
I, on the other hand, was a girl firmly wedged in the realm of mediocrity. My grades were decent, but not great. I was on the cheerleading squad, not an actual sports team like my parents wanted. As if cheerleading wasn’t a sport. I wasn’t as pretty or as smart as her. I felt like my sister’s shadow, most of the time.
Since she’d left for college, I’d blossomed somewhat, but her influence was far-reaching. She still phoned home, and my parents talked about her quite a bit, even in her absence.
I shook my head, wondering why my thoughts had chosen to meander to that corner of my psyche, as I turned on the unfamiliar shower. Water sluiced cleanly over me, washing away the sweat and saliva and semen. I suddenly tensed, realizing what he’d done to me. He’d come inside me. And I wasn’t on the pill.
I finished my shower quickly, and wrapped myself in a towel before dashing out into the bedroom. Mr. Hendricks was lying on the bed. “I’m not on the pill,” I said breathlessly, knowing that he would know what I meant.
He stood, and my legs grew weak at the knees again. Damn him for being able to do this to me! I was worried, yet I still wanted him to jump on me and ravage me, and take me with as much force as he could muster. Which I was certain was a lot.
“It’s quite all right,” he said smoothly. “I’ve got that taken care of on my side.”
I nodded mutely. He must have had that operation I’d vaguely heard about in Health class. A vasectomy, I think it was called. That worry melted away, but others rose to take its place.
Now that I’d had a few minutes to calm down, I realized the gravity of my situation. I’d had sex with this man. And I wanted more. I knew deep down that people would think it was wrong, though. That he was taking advantage of me, my youth, my innocence, my willingness to please. But they were wrong.
As first, I was planning on using him, to get back at Maddie. But I should have known better. I should have known from the first moment that I conceived of this plan that he was not a man to be used in such a manner. And now he had me, thoroughly and completely. I needed him.
And it was amazing how quickly that need had grown. I had always been a people pleaser, and this seemed like the ultimate pleasure.
I felt so confused however. My brain was a scattered mix of thoughts, with completely random ones frothing and bubbling to the surface, seemingly unbidden. What was I going to do?
Mr. Hendricks answered that question for me. He strode over to me now, sensing my agitation, and embraced me firmly, a hand stroking my wet hair. “Madison has volleyball practice every Saturday, from 7 to 9 in the evening. If you want to continue with this… exploration, come see me next week at that time.”
“Yes, sir.” I nodded as I spoke, and I knew I couldn’t possibly refuse him.
Chapter 6
It was 8:45 when I left his house, and I felt like I was in a dream. I was driving on a cloud as my car rolled through the coiled street of the wealthy neighborhood. The last couple of hours had been the most wonderfully surreal ones in my short life, and I only wanted more. I wanted more time with him. With my master.
As I had dressed myself, making ready to finally leave his house, he’d grabbed my shoulders once again, firmly, but not roughly.
“I want to lay down some ground rules in this relationship,” he said in an authoritative voice. I knew I would have no choice but to obey whatever rules he set for me. “First,” he continued, “I am the one who will determine meeting dates and times. If you want to visit with Madison, fine, but I will not interact with you at those times.
“Second, I am your master. You will address me as such, or as sir. My word is law, and you must obey me.” He stared at me sternly now, as I nodded silently. I knew he was looking out for my best interests. I was a stupid child, and sure to make mistakes if I was given any control at all.
“Third, you are not to speak of this relationship with anyone. I think you know why.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Fourth, you are to meet me here at 7pm, every Saturday night. What’s your phone number?”
I dutifully gave it to him.
As he punched the number into his cell, he smiled. “If there are other times we can meet, or if Madison’s practice is ever cancelled, I will send you a text. It’s your duty to make sure you read it.”
“Yes, sir.” I felt a small thrill every time I used that word. He was my master.
“Good. Now I want you to go home. If your parents ask where you’ve been, you now join Madison and watch her practice.” He thought of everything, even the perfect excuse for me.
And now I was agonizingly on my way home. I wanted to do nothing more than stay with Mr. Hendricks for the rest of my life, but I knew I had to depart at some point. But I would be back.
I was hoping to not have to speak with my parents when I got home. I didn’t want anything to pull me out of this lovely dream and back into reality. But luck wasn’t on my side, and my father was at the kitchen table when I walked in the house.
"Hey sweetie, where've you been?" He didn't ask the question in an accusatory tone, but I felt accused nonetheless.
"Hanging out with Maddie," I said defensively. Maybe a little too defensively.
"That's all?" he pressed. I knew he was trying to push me for further answers, but he certainly wasn't as intimidating as Mr. Hendricks could be. He was a sweet, soft man, short with blond thinning hair. He had a round feminine face, and a slight frame. He looked rather like a male version of myself, and that was understandable, as I was his blood.
"Yeah, I continued, feeling slightly more confident. I wasn't much of a liar, but my dad wasn't much of a sleuth. "She asked me to come to practice with her, and I agreed. That's all."
"Ah, I see. There's some dinner in the fridge, if you want it." He went back to reading his book, sipping his tea. Mom hated how he drank tea so late at night, and kept trying to pushing herbal blends on him, but he wouldn't budge from his Earl Grey.
Feeling more at ease, I now opened the fridge door, and wedged my face in there, looking for something to eat. I was a bit famished.
"Oh, have you heard from any colleges, yet?" my dad asked, his voice echoing in the door.
Colleges. If anything could have pulled me out of my dreamlike trance faster, it was college talk. My parents had pushed me to apply to the same schools as my sister, God only knows why. She was the genius. I would be lucky to be going to a public, state run school, with my grades.
And after the night I had, I didn't even want to think about college.
"I don't know," I replied after many long moments. "When do they start sending letters about this kind of stuff?"
"Your sister got most of her acceptance letters around the end of March, or the beginning of April." God. That was two weeks away.
I felt irrational panic begin to rise in my gut. As soon as I found one thing, one thing wonderful in my life, it was going to be ripped away from me.
But that's how these things went. My parents expected college, and off to college I would go. Even it was a local community college for some bullshit degree.
My appetite was thoroughly vanquished by the subject, and I closed the fridge door now, heading upstairs. I was suddenly very tired. I just wanted it to be next Saturday already.
Chapter 7
The week went by so sluggishly, I swear time had slowed by half. Maddie seemed to be back to her old, un-skeptical self, and I certainly wasn't going to push the subject of her father.
I tried to remain angry with her, but it was difficult. After all, she'd led me to this amazing budding relationship/thing/whatever-it-was with her father. I couldn't hate her, because of that.
But that didn't mean I had to like her. I was cordial enough to her during classes and lunch, but that was it. I would never forget what she'd done to me.
Jess, Ash, and Sophie could tell something about me had changed. They assumed something inside me broke when I caught Maddie and Joey that fateful day, only a week ago. I couldn't even begin to explain what was happening with me, so I didn't bother trying. Let them think that I was having problems dealing with life.
I floated through the week. I felt like I was simultaneously above it all, and not even there. My mind was with Mr. Hendricks. I couldn't stop thinking about him. I didn't know why, but my thoughts just kept drifting back to the man. He'd mesmerized me, captivated me. He'd shown me the tiniest taste of possibilities I didn't even know existed. And I knew he would show me more.
On Thursday, I guessed Jess couldn't take my freaky behavior anymore, because she pulled me aside to have a frank discussion with me.
"What is up with you?" she asked in one of the hallway alcoves. Though there were students buzzing all around, we were relatively secluded.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I replied, more than a little defensively as I looked to the side at a most fascinating bug on the ground.
Jess grabbed my chin with a hand and forcefully pulled my face back to hers. "No, and this is exactly what I mean. You've been distracted all week. Is it Maddie? Did she say something to you? Do you want me to punch her for you?"
Momentarily snapped out of my weeklong trance by her fire, I couldn't help but laugh. Jess' eyes were smoldering. She was always such a firecracker, and with her flame red hair, it was really fitting. "No, no," I said, trying to calm her down. She wasn't pleased by my laughing. "I guess I just realized there are more important things than high school romances."
Her eyes narrowed. "Are you on drugs?"
"No!"
Now her eyes widened. "No… it's another guy, isn't it!"
It my turn to widen my eyes into startled blue orbs. Jess knew she hit her mark just then. "Who is it?" she demanded. "Is it someone at school?"
"No! I mean, it's no one!"
"No one that goes here?"
"No one at all!"
Jess shook her head now, smirking. "Come on Krys, I've seen that look on your face twice before. You're in love. Or lust. Or something. Spill the beans!"
"It's no one, I swear!"
She rolled her eyes in an exaggerated motion. "Whatever. You can't keep him a secret forever."
"Yes I can, because he doesn't exist." I was nervous, though. Jess had knocked me out of my blissful state, and I spent the rest of the day on edge, just waiting for another onslaught of questions.
I was starting to doubt myself, too. Why the hell did a man like Mr. Hendricks want to be with an inexperienced little dope like me? He was drop dead gorgeous, he could've gone out into the world and gotten any woman he wanted. Why did he choose me, of all people? Was I just convenient to him?
I felt my nerves on the rise all through Friday, and by Saturday, I was a little anxious ball yet again. It was even worse than last time, for some strange reason. I knew part of it was because Mr. Hendricks hadn't contacted me at all through the week, and I was desperate for some sort of communication with him. I didn't know if he changed his mind, or if he wanted to go through with this for a second time. I had to assume from his silence that he did.
My parents could sense my growing anxiety, and they'd been concerned about my somewhat strange behavior all week. My dad assumed that it was because I broke up with Joey, but my mom was slightly more perceptive. She caught me on Saturday on my way the kitchen for some food.
"Krystal, can I have a word with you?" she asked as I passed her in the hallway.
"Uh, sure, I guess." I hadn't been talking much to my parents lately. Tensions were high - they wanted me to do things that I definitely do want to do, such as homework and clean the house. But I had far more important things on my mind than keeping my room neat.
"You've been acting strange, and I just want to make sure everything's all right."
I recoiled defensively. "Of course everything's okay!" Why did she have to be so nosy? Ever since my sister left for college last September, she had no one to focus on but me. It was getting aggravating. "Why do you care, anyways? Why don't you just go call my sister? She's the good one, remember?"
"Oh sweetie." I sighed inwardly at those inevitable words. I was going to get the guilt trip about how we were both equally important, and how dare I phrase it any other way. "You know we don't compare the two of you. How can you think that?"
"Sorry Mom." I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Why did she think that laying the blame on me would help me feel any better? I knew she was just doing it to assuage her own guilt. "I know you and Dad don't think that way."
"Good. Now, what's on your mind? I know it isn't Joey."
I curled my lips upward slightly in a sneer, at the mere mention of that boy's name. I didn't like being reminded of his existence at all now. He did nothing for me, and only pulled me out of my euphoria surrounding Maddie's father. But my mom didn't know about the exact circumstances of our break-up and I just couldn't get her to stop talking about him. "You're right. I guess I'm worried." That much was true. "About colleges, and stuff." That there was a lie. College was the last thing on my mind at the moment. But I knew the acceptance letters would be arriving soon, so it made for a convenient excuse.
"Oh, I see." My mom patted my shoulder awkwardly. Physical affection had never really been her thing. "I'm sure you'll get accepted into your primary, and you know you don't need to get a scholarship. We've got a fund for you." I nodded, my mind drifting to other things. I really didn't want to think about college at all, but now that I had her on the subject, my mom wouldn't shut up.
She was always going on and on about how it would be hard, but I would adjust, and that she had trouble adjusting too, when she was my age. She'd gotten a D in French her freshman year, because she had been so stressed out. I'd only heard this story a million times before, so I naturally delighted in hearing it for the million and first.
"So, you know your father and I will support you, no matter what," she concluded.
I nodded and smiled, trying to make like I'd paid attention to the entire conversation. In reality, I was thinking about Mr. Hendricks. How could he felt between my legs. What an amazing man he was. "I know, mom," I added to my nod. She seemed to be waiting for something.
"Oh sweetie, I'm so proud of you, I just want you to know that." She went in for an awkward hug, and I was feeling thoroughly confused. What had gotten into her?
Finally, she let me go, and I spent as little time in the kitchen as possible, and ran back to my room with a peanut butter sandwich. I didn't want my dad stopping me for a heart-to-heart either. Flicker snaked his way out from under my crowded bed, soliciting pets. I had a feeling he knew I was nervous, too, but at least he didn't talk back.
And I was nervous. I wanted it to be 7 already, but I had a few hours to go. With each minute that passed, I was less and less sure about whether I should even see him again, or not. This was so strange. I felt completely out of my depth, in this bizarre relationship. And I knew it was odd. But I didn't want it to stop.
Still, by the time 6:30 rolled around, I'd once again resolved not to go. I couldn't bear the thought of being rejected. My mind kept rolling through all the scenarios that I mig
ht have to face, from him laughing at me at the door of his house, telling me it was all a joke, to him being an ax murderer and killing me the second I walked in the door.
Essentially, it was more of the same from the last week.
But yet again, by the time 6:45 rolled around, I was out the door, making my way to his house. It was like the external force was controlling me, guiding me. I needed more of this man, and I was willing to risk ridicule, or even my life, just to get it. Though I didn't really think he was a serial killer. If he was, he would've done me in last week.
Trembling in my thigh high boots, and not just from the slight chill, I now made my way up is walk. Mr. Hendricks must've seen my little sedan pull up his driveway, and he was waiting by the front door; it was opened already, and I saw his form leaning against the threshold.
Part of me wanted to just fall into his arms the moment I was close enough, and tell him how much I missed him, how much I needed him, but something stayed my hand. I had a feeling he would be aggravated by that. I got the sense that he viewed this more as a business arrangement than any sort of romance. We both wanted something, and we exchanged what it was we had, nothing more, nothing less. But I knew I wanted it to be more.
As soon as I entered the foyer, he was on me, kissing me, groping me roughly, just as he had the week earlier, and I returned his advances. My need for him had been building through the course of the week, and the fragile nervousness I felt simply popped, like a bubble. My worrying had been for nothing.
Just like last week, he led me upstairs, to his room. But there was something lying on his bed, glinting brightly against those ebony black sheets.
It was amazing how innocuous those four sets of steel handcuffs looked, just lying on the bed. After all, they were merely pieces of metal. But their sole purpose was the restrain. He looked at me meaningfully as I stared at the things, and I knew exactly what he intended to do to me, tonight.
Her Father, My Master: Mentor Page 4