The Dark Witch

by Tabitha Scott

  Both Pulania and I are shaking messes, we’re both sitting, “Yes, your Supreme Evality,” we intone in unison, and I’m pretty sure the fear carries in our voices.

  “What about Susan?” Gil pipes up.

  “Who’s that?” Hatchesput spits. “Who else is there?”

  “It’s me, Gil. Amura’s familiar. Susan’s here, too.”

  “Well Gil,” the sneer is more than evident, “just so you know, your neck’s on the line too. As for this Susan, we’re taking her into the coven. She’s one of us now.”

  Something twigs in my mind, Susan is looking fearfully around, I’m pretty sure her coven wasn’t a dark one. I don’t think she’d last a week as a dark witch.

  “Your Supreme Evality, we don’t know if all of Susan’s coven is gone. There could still be some members alive, perhaps they’re in hiding somewhere. They may have a claim on her.”

  That was a serious thing, claiming an orphaned witch was one thing, stealing a member of another coven was in violation of the covenant, and could bring the wrath of all the covens down on our heads.

  “Well, huh, drat. Does she have much magik?” her Supreme Evality asks.

  “Not that much,” I answer. “But it’s hard to tell, I can’t get a good sight on it, it’s like it’s shifting around or something.”

  “Ah, that just means she’s untrained, you’re looking at raw magik there. Well, no loss to us then. Right, she’s under the protection of the coven. We’ll abide by the covenant one hundred percent, we don’t want another Fae war, they’re bad for business. You two look after her and make sure she doesn’t die, especially horribly, that would be very bad if she died horribly. Try and train her up too. If we don’t find any of her people, we’ll be claiming her as ours, so make sure she’s ready for it.”

  “Yes, your Supreme Evality.”

  The phone hangs up without so much as a goodbye, not that you’d expect one from the queen of the dark witches.

  Chapter 9: Shocking, isn’t it?

  “Crap.” Pulania and I are still quaking from our close call. “We aren’t going anywhere tonight girls, not after that.” It wasn’t a change of plan, it was just reality, you can’t find your way on the magikal path if you can’t concentrate, and there was no way that either Pulania or I were going to be able to gather enough of our wits to do it.

  “Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, that was too close,” Pulania says, we’re going to take ages to recover.

  “Oh, okay, I’ll be on my way home then,” Susan replies.

  Like, really?

  “No, I’m afraid you won’t… not until Pulania and I have had a gallon of alcohol, and recovered from the hang over. You won’t be able to find your way.”

  “It’s just down the path toward the school. It’s not far, I’ll be fine.”

  “Explain it to her, Gil,” I ask.

  “Amura is right, we aren’t going anywhere tonight. That path is magikal, it could take you anywhere, you need strong magik to navigate it properly, we’re not in Pennsylvania, Toto.”

  “What? I don’t understand.”

  “We’re in Scotland,” Gil replies.

  Susan’s face has just gone blank, it’s almost comical, but both Pulania and I need something to calm our nerves, both of us are going into shock, that’s what’s causing the shakes. I try to stand but my legs just aren’t cooperating. “Gil, get Pulania and I a drink, straight up, and some blankets.”

  My teeth have begun to chatter. Susan and Gil have just noticed that we’re in a bit of distress.

  “I’m on it,” Gil is on her feet, she’s the best. In a couple of minutes she’s got Pulania and I wrapped up in blanket cocoons with a straight scotch (I would have preferred to stick with vodka) in our hands.

  Susan is frozen. I think it’s all a bit too much for her.

  “Oh, shit, give that girl another margarita can you, Gil?”

  “Sure thing, Amura.”

  “Shit, shit, shit.” Pulania swears again.

  “Ummm. I don’t really get what’s going on?” Susan moans.

  My teeth are chattering too much to answer. Gil pats Susan on the shoulder.

  “Listen up bitch, Pulania and Amura have escaped death from the wicked queen of the dark, they’re out of it, and we’re stuck here cause we can’t find our way on the feckin’ path outa here. Got it?”

  There’s only silence, it’ll take a while for it to settle in, but even I can tell that it’s all a bit too much for Susan.

  “I’ll just give my mom a call, and let her know I’m running a bit late.”

  “Mum? What mum?” I chatter.

  “My step mom, she’s alright.”

  Like, whatever. Susan tries her mobile (cell) phone, but ends up just staring at the speaker.

  “It says I don’t have coverage in the UK.”

  Duh, is that like a revelation or something? This girl is so slow.

  “You can call your mum on the landline.” I manage to chatter. “But tell her it’s an all-nighter.” I point to the phone on the wall – yep, even a witches’ cottage can have a land line.

  Susan gets up, somewhat hesitantly, and goes to the phone. “How do I dial Pennsylvania?”

  After a bit of explanation of how to use UK long distance, Susan eventually gets on to her step mum.

  “I’m staying with Amura and Gil, at Amura’s place.”

  “They’re friends mom.” We’re only getting one side of this conversation.

  “Hmm, sure Amura’s mother is right here.” Susan shoves the phone toward Pulania, who instantly starts waving it away in a state of panic. But Susan is relentless, there is a push phone battle for a second or two, but then Pulania eventually concedes and takes the hand held. Thankfully, her teeth aren’t chattering like mine.

  “Hello, Amura’s mother here, who am I speaking to?” Pulania is pulling all sorts of faces as she says this.

  “Hah uh, well Susan is fine to stay the night. I think they’re studying calculus…”

  What the feck? Where did she pull that one from?

  “…well, I have heard a bit more boy talk than calculus, and they are playing some music, but girls will be girls.”

  “Sure, we’ll send her home tomorrow.” Pulania shoves the phone back toward Susan like it’s contaminated or something.

  “Is that alright, mom?” She nods to the phone, “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

  When she hangs up, we burst out in hysterics.

  “How did I get to be the mum?” Pulania manages to get out despite tears of laughter.

  “No offence, but you are the oldest.” I deadpan, before breaking out into another fit of laughter. Pulania is a good seventy years older than I am, but her immortal body is only in its early twenties, she could no more pass for my mother than Gil could.

  After the laughing and having warmed up a bit, the shakes stop for Pulania and I. We settle down to an evening of watching girly flicks. I ditch the scotch and move to margaritas. There’s no use pretending that our minds aren’t elsewhere, though. When the two younger girls finally flake out, my coven sister and I have a serious discussion. Given the number of drinks we’ve each had it’s a bit scary how clear our thinking is. But fear can do that to you.

  “We aren’t out of the woods by a long shot.” Pulania leads the conversation.

  “I agree, and despite what Hatchesput says, I don’t think we can let up on our research either.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah,” I reply. “Even if we can figure out what’s happening with Susan and her coven, that won’t be the end of it. We need a backup plan and some backup results. We don’t really have the option of letting anything go, we have to do both.”

  “I see your point,” Pulania agrees. “If this Susan thing ends up being nothing, then we’ll have nothing to look forward to beyond Solstice.”

  “I was going to suggest we pool our resources and just go for one combined line of research.”

  “Hmm, I can see the
advantage of that. We don’t have the resources to do a big virus, or a big bacteria outbreak. Maybe if we can combine the two, we might end up with something that can cause enough damage to impress the coven.”

  “That’s what I was thinking. How about this clap of Susan’s? It’s antibiotic resistant, and it’s landed right in our laps, or in hers, at least.”

  “Yeah, we need to get some cultures before we let a white witch anywhere near her,” Pulania asserts. “I’m thinking there’s more to her clap then something that’s developed here in the UK and somehow made it across to Pennsylvania. I think another coven has developed something new, and that we might just be able to piggyback off of it.”

  I lean into Pulania, “I’ve got a selection of phage delivery viruses, and some of them are herpes based.” That’s got her attention.

  “Really?… do tell.”

  Chapter 10: Susan’s coven

  “Susan! Susan!” I nudge her again. “Wake up, we have a question for you.” Pulania and I thought we had a way of jogging some of Susan’s memories. As a kid she might not have known exactly what was going on around her, but we’d worked out a question or two that might provide some much needed information.

  “Wha, what?”

  “That took a bit,” Pulania comments.

  Gil is rubbing her eyes too. “What time is it?”

  “6:00 am, your time.”

  “Eh.” She collapses back down pulling a sofa pillow over her head. They’d flaked out on the sofa overnight.

  “Susan!”

  “Yeah, what is it?”

  “Do you remember doing anything naked with your mum?”

  “Huh?”

  “Did you go anywhere naked with your mum? It would have been somewhere public, like a field or somewhere?” I ask her.

  “What? Naked?” But Susan’s eyes clear, I can see her mind going back to somewhere long ago. “Yeah,” she nods her head, “several times.”

  “How many other people were there?” Pulania asks.

  Susan is wide awake now. “There were other women there, they were naked too.”

  She’s doing really well considering how much alcohol she would have had. “How many?” I ask. “Can you count them?”

  “About six others, maybe.”

  “That’s not very many at all,” I comment to Pulania.

  “It would be a family based coven, by the sound of it.”

  “That’ll make it easy, we can just trace Susan’s maternal family members.”

  “Oh, they weren’t relatives, I would have known if they were,” Susan pipes up.

  Pulania and I look at Susan, and then back at each other.

  “That’s going to make it harder to trace them. What sort of coven were they?” I ask.

  “Who knows,” Pulania replies, “maybe we’ll find out. It sounds a bit strange though.”

  “None of them at all, were relatives?” I ask.

  “Well, I remember my aunt being there for some of the… ceremonies. But she had some falling out with my mother before mom died, so I haven’t seen her since before then.”

  “The aunt might be a suspect in this,” Pulania observes.

  “Hmm,” I reply, “maybe. She might also be someone who knows what’s going on.”

  “I have a headache,” Susan complains.

  “You’re hung over sweetie. Is this your first time?”

  I let Pulania comfort Susan with a few words, while I check out my herb collection for something that might help with that. Despite having a modern kitchen, I have a collection of dried herbs hanging from the cupboard hooks and such. It does look a little witchy, if ‘new’ witchy. I quickly select a few items and deftly grind them up with a mortar and pestle. I get the kettle going and after it’s boiled I make up an infusion to help Susan with her hang over.

  “Here, sweetie, try this, it’ll help with the head ache.”

  Susan, takes a cautious sniff of the concoction, “it doesn’t smell very good.”

  “But it will be good for you. I’ve added some cold water, you should just swig it down.”

  Susan does as she’s told. But, on finishing, she starts to gag.

  “Washrooms that way, dear.”

  She races from the room, and a second later we can hear her throwing up in the toilet bowl.

  “Wish she’d closed the door,” I say to Pulania.

  As the sound continues, I yell out to Susan “Don’t make a mess in there. If you do there’s some paper towel under the sink.”

  “What did you give her?” Pulania smirks.

  “Oh, some ipecac. Better out than in.”

  “That was evil.” We hear Gil mutter, from under her pillow.

  “We need Susan bright as a button. There’s work to do. But I’ll put that in my next report, thanks Gil. By the way, how’s your head? Do you need a remedy too?”

  “No. Sleeping.” Is all we get from her.

  “Coffee for me.” Pulania and I haven’t slept all night, but we aren’t likely to wind down enough to rest for quite some time.

  “Hmm, who’s up for coffee in Australia then?”

  “Really?” Having emptied her stomach , Susan has stuck her head out from the washroom. She’ll feel better after that, and apparently the prospect of travel is enough to get over anything.

  “Really.” I answer her.

  Chapter 11: Coffee after an all-nighter

  Thirty minutes later we’re ensconced in my favourite coffee hang out, in Oz. I’ve changed our arrival to an earlier time than usual, it’s six thirty in the morning here too, and still a little dark. I’m not in the mood for sunshine. Actually, I never am, maybe I’ll come here at this time every morning.

  At the moment I’m just having a sip of the most glorious part of day, and watching how the others react.

  “This is really strong,” Susan comments.

  “Mine’s really strong too,” Gil adds.

  Oh please! They’re only having milked down cappuccinos, I’m having a triple shot flat white. How can those be too strong for them?

  Pulania is rolling her eyes. “You know, you can add a bit of extra milk if you want.”

  She turns to me, “they’re just too used to that weak stuff they serve in America. This is really good, Amura.”

  Well, at least somebody appreciates it.

  “Oh crap.”

  “What?” they all turn to look at me, but my eyes are out the window watching the figure that’s approaching.

  “Oh crap.” I say again, as I get up and race out to intercept him. He’s walking down the path toward the shop. What the ficketty feck is he doing here?

  “Hey, what are you doing here? Are you following me?” I ask him as I bail him up. Thankfully, we’re far enough away that the girls won’t be able to hear.

  “Oh, hey, Amura.” He leans in to kiss me, but he can’t do that here.

  “Don’t do that, people are watching us!” Teddy backs off, and looks over at the coffee shop.

  “Oh, it’s your coven sister.”

  “Yeah, and I’d prefer not to be executed by the coven because I’m screwing an angel, so don’t touch me while they’re watching. What the shit are you doing here?”

  “Well, I’ve come for my morning coffee.”

  “What? But this is my coffee place.”

  “I know, you introduced me to it, remember. I come here every morning, but I usually come earlier than you, I want to give you your space. You’re early this morning.”

  Well, that’s actually kinda nice, I’m glad somebody else appreciates my favourite spot.

  “Oh, well, okay, sorry, but you have to piss off now. You can’t be here.”

  “Yeah, I can see the problem. Okay,” there’s concern in his eyes, “I’ll come back later when it’s less crowded. Let me know how things go.”

  A few people walk between us and Teddy has disappeared when they pass. Ficketty fecking angels, gee they’re good at that sort of shizz, he disappeared right there on the stree
t, in front of everyone, and not one of the passing mortals even noticed.

  I’m heading back into the coffee shop when the questions start.

  “Who was that hunk?” Gil asks. “How do you know him?”

  “Where did he go?” Susan adds.

  “He’s a ficketty fecking angel, he’s been hanging around for ages, I told him to piss off.” And actually, none of that was a lie. I’m definitely slipping.

  “Really? There are angels?” Susan and Gil are looking at each other with big smiles plastered on their faces, like they’ve just discovered orgasms or something.

  Pulania is sipping her coffee and eyeing me off. Oh shit, she’s figured it out. I try to distract the conversation.

  “Down to business, we need to get Susan into our labs today to look at her gonorrhea.”

  “Gee, do you think you could say that any louder.” Susan’s face has turned a deep crimson red. “I mean, I don’t think they heard you in the next block.”

  My turn to turn red.

  I push through in a quieter voice. “We also need to figure out where to find your aunt. What’s her name? Where is she likely to be?”

  “Well…my mom’s maiden name was Whyte spelt with a ‘y’…”

  “White witches.” Pulania and I intone, we lean back putting down our coffees. Bloody obvious, with a name like that. This changes things a bit.

  “I thought white witches only worked alone, or at most with an apprentice? They don’t have covens. Do they?” I ask Pulania. She still hasn’t stopped looking at me funny.

  “Yeah, that’s my understanding, too.”

  “Shouldn’t she be able to cure herself?” Gil asks.

  We all look over at Susan, who just shrugs, “I don’t know how to do any of that stuff.”