Barbie World (Baby Doll Series)

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Barbie World (Baby Doll Series) Page 20

by Acosta, Heidi


  “Thanks, but we really should get going.” I smooth down the front of my dress as I rise off the bed.

  “Hold on a moment, I have something for you.” She stands and walks over to the dresser. “Here, I don’t know if this will be much help, but… “ She hands me a newspaper clipping. It is a review of a band in Savannah. “Josephine Starr takes the stage at the Purple Dragon and she brings in a large following with her edgy cover songs of bands from the 80s and 90s… “

  I stop reading and look at Jewel. “I follow her whenever there is a write up in the paper. I guess I was hoping that somehow your mother would show up in the paper with her, mother and daughter duo… “ She laughs. “I don’t know what will happen if you go searching for Josephine. She never wanted children… Will you come back and visit? I know I am not your grandmother, but Roe and Ryker-”

  “I would love to.” I throw myself into her, hugging her as tightly as I can. At first, she is startled, but then she relaxes into the hug, leaning her cheek on my hair. She smells like cigarettes and roses.

  I hug Jewel one more time; it is so surreal to think of her as not the enemy. Roe is sitting on an old lawnmower that is parked in the middle of the yard. When she sees me, she hops down and skips over to me. “So did she tell you where to find her?” she asks eagerly.

  “The last she heard, she was in Savannah.” I tell her.

  “Great, so when do we leave?” Did I just hear her right? Did she say we?

  “What do you mean, we?” I ask her.

  “I am comin’ I have been looking for her, too, ya know.” I know, but there must be a reason Jewel didn’t tell her.

  “No, I don’t think so,” I say.

  “Ya know she is my grandmamma, too. I have just as much right as you do to find her,” she retorts.

  “I didn’t say that, I know you do. I don’t think that Jewel would want that.” She narrows her eyes at me.

  “She would want to meet me; she doesn’t even know about me,” she yells.

  “I didn’t say-”

  “She would want me more than you. We have more in common.” Her bottom lip quivers.

  “Maybe if you talk to Jewel first,” I suggest.

  “No. I already tried. You will not even know I am there, I promise, please.”

  I shake my head no. “I am sorry.”

  “Ya know what? Screw you,” she screams and takes of running. I call after her, but she is too fast. I sigh and turn to my friends who are sitting there, mouths ajar.

  “Nothing like some good old family drama.” Roxie gives me a coy smile.

  Chapter 31.

  Dylan

  We drive back to the hotel after leaving Barbie’s step-grandmother’s house. She is silent, not speaking, processing everything. Kai glances at her in the review mirror and Roxie turns around in the front seat to look at her through the headrest while Third keeps leaning forward, looking at her over me. I, however, stare right at her. I want her to tell me what she is thinking. Please tell me what you are thinking. Let me help you. I can help you. She stares, looking at nothing, chewing on her bottom lip. I don’t know what to do for her, so I do the only thing I can think to do. I slip my hand in hers and hold onto her, letting her know I am here.

  Roxie stills has bags she needs to unload. How many bags did she bring? Third holds a shitload of suitcases that belong to Roxie. I offer to take Barbie’s backpack, but she insists on keeping it.

  “Hey, man, I can use the help,” Third pants.

  I roll my eyes and take one of the suitcases from Third. Holy crap, what is packed in here, dead bodies?

  We drop them off at the girls’ room and Third leaps onto the bed. “So what are the plans for tonight? We should go have fun. We are five crazy kids, out in a small town. Let’s paint the town blue,” he says.

  “Red,” I correct him.

  “And you are going to be seeing red, as in your blood, if you don’t get your nasty feet off my bed,” Roxie grumbles.

  “Chill, girl, chill. Besides, you know you like the look of me in your bed.” He winks at her. She rolls her eyes, but doesn’t disagree with him and Third puts his feet on the floor.

  “I am going to check on Kai while y’all decide,” Barbie says. I hate that she is going to Kai and I can’t do anything except watch her walk out the door.

  I can’t lose her.

  Chapter 32.

  Barbie

  I knock on Kai’s door, chewing on the inside of my cheek until I taste blood. I should have told Dylan what was going on with me, but for some reason I want to talk to Kai. Maybe it is because I know my pain will not affect Kai the way it does Dylan. He takes it as his own and I need to work this out without worrying about how he is processing it.

  Kai opens the door in no shirt, his jeans low on his hips, exposing the rim of his boxers and the deep V between his hips. His tattoos look bright and fresh like he drew them on with a sharpie instead of having them inked into his skin. “Hey,” he says, casually leaning against the door frame.

  “What, you’re not going to invite me in?” I flirt. He looks at me for a moment, debating if he really wants to allow me to continue to play this game with him. I would not blame him if he sent me away, got in his car and left us stranded here, but he is not that type of guy. I know that he is going to ride this thing through. He finally steps aside and lets me in. “Thanks.” I step around him and enter the shabby motel room.

  There are two full sized beds next to each other with brown and yellow flowers on a thin bed spread. Kai claimed the one farthest away from the door as his. Funny. I would have chosen the bed closest to the door, a faster get away if needed. What am I still running from?

  I sit down on the bed next to the door and Kai sits down on his bed, putting his elbows on his knees while he stares at his hands. Suddenly, I am not sure that I made the right choice coming over here; maybe I should have gone to Dylan. It is too late now, though, I am already here,

  “So,” I say.

  “So?” he repeats me.

  “Crazy day.” I smile at him.

  “Yeah, you can say that.” He looks up at me now with a grin threatening to come through.

  “Look I am sorry for everything. If I knew that they would come out here and then… “ I shake my head, thinking about how Dylan looked truly like a knight riding to the rescue. If he hadn’t come, who knows if we would have ever got the car fixed with enough time to go to Savannah.

  “Yeah, it’s cool. I just wish he would back off and realize that you are not his,” he says. I can hear the question behind it; you are not his, right? I have been trying to fight it for so long. I know not being with him would be for the best. How long will I be able to deny myself of him, though?

  “I am not sure,” I say, looking down at my hands. He nods his head in understanding. “There is just so much happening and I am confused. I thought I knew what I wanted, what I needed to do… I am just not sure now.” Tears begin to burn at the back of my throat; I don’t fight them. I let them fall.

  “I am not asking you to choose now, mostly because I am afraid if I asked you, you wouldn’t choose me. He might be your past, but I am hoping to be your future.” He scoots closer to me on the bed. “I will be here now and I will be here after, even if it is not me. I want to be in your life, even if it is just as a friend.” I look up at him, the tears blurring him into a fuzzy mess. It seems like all I ever do lately is cry or get angry.

  I hate that in the end someone is going to end up hurt. Why does anyone want to be in my life anyway? All I do is hurt and break people. Kai wipes at the tears on my cheek with his thumb.

  “You are worth it.” He leans in and kisses my wet lips. It is not a desperately hot kiss; it’s more like a soft, comforting kiss. I do not feel numb and, yet, I feel strangely soothed from it. “I bet your boy is pacing in front of the door, ready to break it down if you don’t get out of here soon.” I take his hand and press it to my cheek and kiss his palm.

  “You are
a good friend.” He cringes at my words, however he still holds onto his smile.

  Chapter 33.

  Dylan

  I sit on an old, rusty lounge chair, staring up at the motel room that Barbie went into. She has been in there a long time and it is taking every ounce of strength I have to stay right where I am at. I grip onto the chair, willing myself to stay. About fifteen minutes of fighting the Hulk inside of me, I begin to debate if I should pull the fire alarm when the motel door opens and she steps out. I can tell she has been crying; her black make-up is running down her cheeks in streaks. I watch as she heads down the stairs, taking them carefully. When she gets to the bottom, she glances over at her room door, hesitating to go in, after a moment she shakes her head and turns and begins to walk towards me.

  She opens the squeaky pool gate, letting it slam behind her, walks over to the pool and stares into it. The lights from the pool send shadows dancing over her. She doesn’t see me. I am hidden in a shadow so I just watch her, seeing what she is going to do. She kicks her shoes off to the side and dips one of her toes into the water testing it.

  “Going in?” I ask her, letting my presence be known.

  Her head snaps up in my direction before she bends over and submerges her hand in the water. “I was debating, but I didn’t bring a bathing suit.” She stands up, putting her wet hand on her hip. That feisty girl I love makes an appearance and I realize how much I missed her.

  “That has never stopped you before.” I remember the girl on the cliff.

  She gives me a shrewd smile. “I bet you think of that moment all the time,” she repartees.

  “Only every other second. Actually, I switch between two memories, you on that cliff and you punching me in the nose.” I rub at my nose for emphasis while she shakes her head, smiling. “I dare you to jump in right now.” I taunt her.

  “What are you, five?” she says, but I can tell that she is toying with the idea.

  “I will tell you what; I will jump in first.” I start to pull off my sneakers.

  “Oh, no, if you are going to do it, it has to be fully dressed,” she says with a gleam to her eyes.

  “Fine.” I back up to the fence and take a running start. I don’t know if she is going to follow, but I hope to God she is. I take a leap of faith into the pool and water fills my shoes, making them heavy as I sink to the bottom.

  I open my eyes, looking to see if my faith was rewarded, but I am in a world of silence, just me and the water. There is a sudden sinking feeling in my chest before the water suddenly cuts around me and I can see her; she is surrounded by tiny bubbles and her dress billows up around her.

  I swim towards her and her to me. My heart takes off in tiny flutters and I am filled with happiness. We stop in the middle, just looking at each other, before she kicks off to the surface and I follow her. When I break the surface, she is laughing; a sound I have not heard in so long. A sound that I would do anything to hear. It is like hearing your favorite song on the radio, one that you have not heard in so long, so you turn it up and belt out the lyrics as loud as you can only to feel emptiness when it’s gone; not sad, just missing it and wishing you’d bought the CD so you could listen to it again. She swims towards the wall and I follow her. We grip onto the wall, just grinning at each other.

  “I like it when you laugh,” I say.

  “Yeah, well, I am laughing because you look like a drowned rat.” She laughs again, splashing me in the face with water.

  “Yeah, well, you don’t look so hot yourself,” I lie and splash her back.

  “Hey,” she complains.

  I grab her and kick away from the wall, bringing her with me. She struggles against me, but doesn’t leave my arms. When I have her in the middle of the pool, everything feels all right again. I have her in my arms and she is smiling, happy. I lean in to kiss her, but she splashes me and pushes my head down under the water. I swallow a mouth full of water.

  “Hey.” I choke and see her climbing out of the pool, still laughing. I swim after her and grab onto her foot to pull her back in, but she kicks free. I chase after her. Isn’t this fitting? I am always metaphorically chasing her and now I literally am. I grab her right before she gets to the gate. I scoop her up in my arms and walk back to the pool.

  “Don’t you dare, Dylan Knight.” She clutches onto my shirt.

  “Do what? This.” I hang her dangerously over the water.

  “Dylan!”

  “What? I wouldn’t throw you into the pool like that.” I say innocently and then I jump into the pool with her in my arms. We carry on like this for some time; her trying to swim away from me and me pulling her back with her splashing or dunking me.

  We walk back together to the rooms, soaking wet. I have my shirt and shoes in my hand when we stop at her door.

  “I had fun,” she says.

  “Yeah, me, too.”

  She looks down at our bare feet. “I want to thank you for coming out to get us, even though it was purely selfish,” she says teasingly.

  “What can I say, I know what I want and I am not about to lose it to some punk rocker.” I say cockily. “Yeah and how do you know I am not going to choose that punk rocker?” I groan as I walk towards her, backing her up against the brick wall, I place my hands on the wall around her. “Because you are mine, and you always will be.” I smile at her. I Take in the beautiful sight of her. Her hair is clumped together and her dress clings to her body from the pool, leaving little to the imagination. “I am not.” She say breathless.

  “Yes you are, or you wouldn’t be here with me, like this, backed up against a wall, waiting on me to kiss you.” She smiles at me, tilting her head in my direction. I want to make sure she remembers how she feels when we are together. I am going to make her see that I am the right choice for her. I am going to prove to her that no one will love her as much as I will. That I will do anything in this world for her. “I am not waiting on you to kiss me.”

  I take her hand in mine and she closes her eyes as I brush my fingers up to her wrist. I make small circles before traveling up the rest of her arm to brush her shoulder and then spread my fingers across her neck.

  She bites down on her bottom lip. It takes everything I have to not say something to screw this up and beg her to be with me. No. If this is to be our last kiss, I want to make sure it is the one she will never forget.

  I take her face in my hands, rubbing my thumb across the soft skin of her cheek. Her breath hitches, her eyes flutter shut as she tilts her head towards me and I part her mouth slightly by gently grazing my thumb across her bottom lip. I bring her forehead to my lips, kissing the spot right between her eyebrows. She sighs and brings her hands to my shoulders, holding me in place. I linger on her forehead, loving the sensation of her.

  “You are the one thing I want more than anything. I have never wanted someone as bad as I want you,” I whisper. I kiss her on her lips now, lightly, letting our breaths intermingle together. Her lips taste slightly salty from the pool and the rain that lingers in the air. I pick her up, she wraps her legs around me and I push into her, thrusting her back up against the wall as I cup her bottom. I bite gently on her bottom lip, sucking it in slightly before our tongues meet.

  Chapter 34.

  Barbie

  His eyes are crystals in the dark. We walk bare footed back to our rooms. Dylan made me forget about all that is happening even if it is only for a moment. “I want to thank you for coming out to get us, even though it was purely selfish,” I say teasingly.

  “What can I say, I know what I want and I am not about to lose it to some punk rocker.” he says, licking his lips. Please, I roll my eyes. “Yeah and how do you know I am not going to choose that punk rocker?” He lets out a groan and walks towards me until I am backed up against the building behind me. He takes another slow, painful step towards me. I bite at my bottom lip, wanting this so badly that my body aches. He is wet and beautiful. He drops his shirt and shoes on the ground next to him. How did we ever
come undone? Why did I ever let him go? He takes another step towards me as the clouds rumble over our heads. “Because you are mine, and you always will be.” His eyes darken with something that I am not used to seeing behind those smoky brown eyes. I am beginning to get used to seeing Dylan like this, he is no longer the boy who I first meet. I am his; I have been since the first day I walked into the auditorium. “I am not.” I say a little breathlessly.

  “Yes you are, or you wouldn’t be here with me, like this, backed up against a wall, waiting on me to kiss you.” I can’t help but smile at that because that is exactly what I am doing. I am practically begging for him to kiss me. “I am not waiting on you to kiss me.” He begins a slow painful journey down my arm, I don’t move. I am not even sure how I am standing. I cannot feel my legs under me. Keeping one hand against the wall above my head, he lets his other drop to his side. I feel the touch of his fingers on mine. I close my eyes as his fingers brush slowly, painfully, up my hand lingering on my wrist. He circles it between his fingers before traveling up the rest of my arm. They brush across my shoulder and then splay across my neck. My skin is seared where his hands touch my skin and a heat has blossomed in my stomach. I want to scream out loud. I want to call out his name, yet I can’t. He has me frozen with his touch.

  I suck in a breath and bite onto the corner of my lip, willing my hands to be still and not touch the shirtless chest in front of me. My fingers ache to paint the fine lines of his chest. My eyes continue down to the deep patterns in his stomach, my gaze following it to where it disappears into the waistband of his jeans. I close my eyes once again. He kisses my forehead softly. Then he places his hands on both sides of my head and leans in towards mine. My heart is beating widely in my chest. Has anyone ever died from a look before? Because I feel like I am about to have a heart attack. His thick lashes shadow his eyes, but I know where they travel. Wherever he looks, my body sparks to life. He might as well be touching every part of my exposed skin. For the first time in my life, I don’t have control over the situation. My mouth will not work and my throat feels swollen. I can barely breathe as I suck in the air that is filled with Dylan’s scent of fresh cut grass and soap, filling me, waking me up from the inside out. He is everywhere. All my senses are alive and filled with him all from a look.

 

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