Caught Read-Handed

by Terrie Farley Moran

  Bridgy ignored me as she is wont to do. “Well, if we get in trouble with the law, I hope the deputy who nabs us is Ryan Mantoni. He’ll go easy. That Frank Anthony—he’s as rigid as he is good-looking.” She babbled along but I wasn’t paying attention.

  I’d moved over to the woods on the bay side of the road and peered at the ground, which was alive with several turtles resting in their shells, a couple of frogs hopping around sea grapes and more salamanders than I could count skittering around. I kept a sharp eye out for snakes. If the fifteen-or-so-foot-long anaconda was around, he’d be easy to spot. It was the smaller snakes that worried me. I saw something light stuck in the gnarled roots of a mangrove. The way it fluttered in the soft bay breeze made me think it was some sort of paper. My first step into the woods caused all the creatures to hide or flee, except the turtles. I guess they were resigned to the fact that anything as big and noisy as I was could clearly outrun them. So, what was the point? They slept on.

  I took another step and felt something on my shoulder. Ew. Maybe a snake hanging from a branch? I jumped back and crashed into Bridgy, who proceeded to scold me in a hoarse whisper. “What is wrong with you? Do you think I’d let you roam around in the woods at dusk with a killer on the loose? Of course I’m right behind you.”

  No point in mentioning that I wouldn’t have to worry about a killer on a loose if I died of fright from her sneaking up behind me, so I took a few more steps and picked up the paper. I recognized it instantly. It was a valet parking ticket from the country club. I elbowed Bridgy back to the road. “Look at this. It’s from the country club. A valet ticket. I hit my iPhone for light and peered. Holy moly. Date stamped the day of the murder.”

  If I was expecting an enthusiastic reaction from Bridgy, I didn’t get it. “Big deal. We know the Lipscomes belong to the country club. Except for Maggie, who I am pretty sure isn’t the country club type, everyone on this block could be club members. Or that little scrap could have blown in from a boat skimming along the bay, which, if I might remind you, is right there, maybe thirty yards away.”

  I knew Bridgy was likely to be right. But I thought it was too much of a coincidence that the only piece of litter to be found on Moon Shell Drive was a valet parking receipt from the day of the murder. I shoved the ticket into my pocket and moved along the edge of the woods, getting closer to the house.

  Bridgy followed along reluctantly. When I reached Lipscome’s driveway, she pulled me back. “Sassy, there are lights on in the house. Barry Baby could come back any second and we have no idea where the sons are. Could we get out of here?”

  I stepped on a tree root that made me six to eight inches taller. I leaned on the trunk, stood on my toes, craned my neck and gawked at every inch of the Lipscome property that was visible. Finally, I stepped down and gave up. Bridgy seemed surprised when I started walking back to the Heap-a-Jeep but she tagged along, happy to be getting away from Moon Shell Drive.

  I made the right onto Estero Boulevard, discontented and heading for home, when Bridgy asked what was bothering me.

  I heaved a sigh. “Tanya Trouble was clobbered while sitting in the hot tub. Try as I might, I couldn’t see it from the road or the woods. Seeing the site might give me clarity into what happened. The hot tub obviously had more privacy than I imagined.”

  Bridgy agreed. “More privacy than most of the hot tubs on the island, except those that are fenced in. Did you see a fence?”

  “No. Not even a screened-in patio. All their outdoor living must be done on the part of the property not visible from the road.”

  “I bet it’s visible from the water. Who in their right mind would own a house on bay-front property and not include a view of the bay? It they can see the bay from a patio or hot tub, boaters on the bay can see them.”

  I could see where she was going with this. A while back, Bridgy and I had gone kayaking looking for a canoe and its owner. It was the first time we were on the water completely on our own. No estuary tour, no certified boating teachers, only the two of us. It was such an awesome experience that we’d gone out every now and again just for fun. “Don’t start. The Lipscome house is way south of Tony’s rental pier. We’re not experienced enough to paddle a kayak all these miles. Tony would have to send the Coast Guard to find us.”

  She shocked me with a quick bob of her head. “You’re right. A boat ride would be silly. Probably couldn’t see much anyway.” She dismissed the topic of Lipscome’s hot tub as a petty annoyance and turned on the car radio.

  I got an idea about something guaranteed to take my mind off the killing. I made a quick turn into a mini-mart parking lot and stopped. “While we’re out, what about Dr. Mays?”

  Bridgy thought for a few seconds. “What about her?”

  “Remember Frank Anthony said that she’d been working with all the government agencies to keep control of the big snakes?”

  Bridgy nodded.

  “Miguel trusts her with Bow more than he trusts anyone else. Why don’t we see if the veterinary hospital is still open? Maybe she could give us a few minutes of her time and some suggestions as to what Miguel could do with Bow until the anaconda is captured.”

  I pulled back out onto the boulevard and headed south once again. If we couldn’t help George solve Alan’s problem, perhaps we could help Miguel.

  We were little more than a block away from the veterinary hospital when Bridgy pointed. “Look. Dr. Mays’s office is lit up like a Christmas tree. Someone is definitely there. This was a great idea. I’ve been so worried about Miguel. Goodness forbid anything happens to Bow.”

  I made a sharp left into the lot. “What is going on here?”

  Among the half dozen cars in the parking lot was one sheriff’s marked car and Miguel’s SUV.

  I slipped into a parking spot and we both jumped out in a great hurry to find out exactly what had brought so many people together.

  Chapter Twenty-four ||||||||||

  Two more cars pulled into the lot while we were doing a heel-toe quickstep toward the animal hospital. We opened the front door and there was so much commotion, we could have been in any Bealls Outlet store on senior citizen discount day.

  Inga, Dr. Mays’s competent jack-of-all-trades, was standing behind the counter with a phone glued to her ear. She waved us in and gestured toward a clipboard on the counter. Confused but curious, we played along. Then a voice from the reception area stopped us.

  “Chicas. Have you come to help?” Miguel was standing with an older gentleman holding the leash of a cottony snow-white dog with a face like a snowball. “Come meet Mr. Gerrity and his magnificent bichon frise. Her name is Countess Aurelia but she answers to Tess.” Miguel turned from us to the pup and gave her fluffy head a brief pat. “Aren’t you a good girl? Yes. You are a good girl.” And he slipped her a dog treat.

  “Miguel, what will Bow say when she discovers you are stepping out on her? And with a dog, no less?” I shook my finger at him and we all enjoyed the joke.

  Mr. Gerrity had a deep, hearty laugh that made his belly shake like Santa Claus. “Actually, young miss, Bow and Tess, well, I can’t say they’re friends but they do tolerate each other as neighbors, sort of like me and Miguel here. Say, where are your pets?”

  I shook my head. “Apartment dwellers. We thought about it but it wouldn’t work out. With a fifth-floor patio, I’d be a nervous wreck every time we opened the patio door.”

  “For which I am so grateful. If Sassy and Bridgy—” Miguel indicated to Mr. Gerrity who was who. “If they were able to have a pet, they would have given my Bow a loving home and I would be without my corazón, my beloved kitty.”

  “Is that why you are here? Is Bow getting a checkup? I didn’t know Dr. Mays had such late office hours.”

  “No. I thought you knew. I thought you are here to help. Dr. Mays, fine woman that she is, has decided that until the anaconda is gone, we will run
a pet-sitting service for the animals who usually roam free on the island. When the animal’s family is at work or church or shopping, the animal can stay here. There will be volunteers on call to help out as needed.”

  “So Bow can stay here while you work?”

  “Sí. And for part of that time, Mr. Gerrity and Tess will come and watch over her. It is all nicely arranged. So far twenty-two animals will reside here safely for some part of the day. It’s like a cooperative. When I’m not working, Bow and I will come here for a few hours to help keep the other pets safe and happy.”

  Mr. Gerrity told us that he was on his way to meet friends for supper. “Tess isn’t much of an out-of-doors dog. Sits around the side yard for a while during the day. Barks at the occasional egret. That’s about her speed outdoors. But Miguel and I thought it would be a good idea if I brought her in for a bit tonight so she gets used to the place. When we come back tomorrow to help out with the other dogs and visit with Bow, Tess will be comfy.”

  He bade us good night.

  I had to ask. “Miguel, when did all this happen?”

  “It was Lieutenant Anthony’s idea. He spoke with Dr. Mays and then called me. We three met and decided we could provide safety for the pets until the snake is . . . resolved.”

  “Frank Anthony? Really?” I was having trouble understanding that he would be concerned enough to worry about the small animals. Didn’t the sheriff’s department have other things to do? Like solve a murder? Still, I was overjoyed. Miguel was not the only pet owner who was alarmed about the anaconda. No matter who had the idea, it was a good one.

  “Ay, sí. This is so much better than the old days. During Hurricane Charley, no one would help with pets. Islanders were told to go to shelters on the mainland. No pets allowed. Can you imagine? That is when I met Dr. Mays. I was working in the big hotel, the one down on the beach, and the sous chef decided he would not leave his cats behind. I invited him to come with me, cats and all, to stay with my relatives in Orlando. We were ready to leave when he heard that Dr. Mays had rented a vacant restaurant on the mainland for animals and their owners if they wished to ride out the storm together. That is where he decided to go. I went along to help with the animals. It is how I met Dr. Mays.”

  The door to the examining room opened, and Ryan Mantoni and Frank Anthony came out deep in conversation. I heard Frank say, “And see that a car stops by every hour that this facility is open. The deputy is to park and stop to see if there is anything we can do to help. And make sure the front desk has the doctor’s cell number.”

  Ryan nodded and then turned around and practically bumped into us. “Oh, hey, are you two here to help?”

  Since everyone seemed to think so, I found it easier to smile and nod.

  Frank gave us a quick salute and they hustled toward the door as though they were expecting a busy night.

  The few times I’d met Cynthia Mays she was dressed in the most professional suits and dresses with a long white medical coat on top. So when a tall, attractive African American woman dressed in cutoffs and a white tee shirt emblazoned with the colorful emblem of the most recent Fort Myers Beach Shrimp Festival appeared, it took me a minute to recognize Dr. Mays.

  She came over and welcomed us warmly. “Nice to see you again. Thanks so much for joining our little crusade. We’re covered for the rest of today and early tomorrow, but Inga can fit you into a convenient volunteer slot.”

  Frank Anthony interrupted. “Doctor, I have to get back but Ryan is arranging for you to have the watchful eyes of the Lee County Sheriff’s Department on your office at all times. Anything you need, just call one of those phone numbers I gave you, someone will be at your service.”

  He gave us all that “two fingers to the eyebrow” salute that he is so fond of and walked out the door with Ryan right behind him.

  “Everyone has been so helpful. Miguel, did you tell the ladies about Publix?”

  “Oh, I stopped in at Publix to pick up some distilled water—I won’t allow my Bow to drink tap water—and Rhonda was on the register. I mentioned that Dr. Mays was running a temporary shelter to protect the small animals from the big snake. Before I could walk across the parking lot, the manager was calling me. He asked that I bring my car to the curb and he had two clerks load up animal food and treats, and even more distilled water.”

  That is the way of life on Estero Island. Neighbors help neighbors no matter what the crisis. I thought of George and wondered how his visit with Alan went. I’d have to call as soon as we were done signing up as volunteer pet-sitters.

  Bridgy and I decided we’d alternate late afternoon, early evening and cover each other’s tour of duty if something came up. She signed up for the following day and I was on tap for the day after that.

  Dr. Mays thanked us profusely and then moved off to greet two women who came in with a small pet carrier. I was wondering if the occupant was a cat or a dog when I heard an angry meow from inside the carrier and that question was answered.

  My cell phone rang. As I pulled it out of my pocket, I felt something drop to the floor. The valet ticket. Darn. I could have given it to Ryan but it never crossed my mind. I was busy being charmed by Mr. Gerrity and Tess. And the two deputies were there and gone. All too quick for me. I decided to call Ryan first thing in the morning. First thing after the funeral service, that is.

  The caller was Pastor John. I feared bad news but I chirped a cheery hello.

  “Sassy, so glad I found you. I’m home. Owen and Mark are here. I know you’re going to see Mark in the morning but they were wondering if you could meet with them tonight. We could come to the café.”

  “No problem. Stay where you are. Bridgy and I are right down the street at the animal hospital. We’ll see you in a few.”

  I hung up and told Bridgy we had another mission. We waved good-bye to Dr. Mays and as we were walking to the car, Bridgy said, “What a great person. Do you think we could hang out with Cynthia Mays sometime?”

  “I’d love to, but I doubt we’ll have the chance to before the big green anaconda is permanently removed from Estero Bay.”

  And we headed from one crisis to the other.

  * * *

  The three men were sitting on the patio, and Jocelyn was being the perfect pastor’s wife serving cold drinks and a tray of droopy vegetables with a grayish-looking dip. Miguel would not approve. I decided to pass.

  Bridgy and I sat on a love seat of white wicker covered by pillows decorated with a motif of brightly colored birds-of-paradise. The chairs the men occupied were an exact match. The grouping surrounded a glass-topped green wrought iron coffee table. Once we were seated, Mark Clamenta got right to the point. It had been such a long day that I appreciated his directness.

  “I went to the hospital with Alan’s family and we were able to see him this afternoon. I gave them privacy for a while but then all five of us spent the rest of the visit together.” He shifted to the right and the left edge of the seat cushion popped on an angle when he crossed his legs.

  “First off, Alan knew who they were and he knew who I was. He was inclined only to have small, polite conversations. No matter what you asked—how did he feel, how were they treating him, how was the food—Alan answered ‘fine.’ That seemed to unnerve the family. I think they expected more.

  “When George was outside talking to the doctor, the sister pressed Alan about the murder. She asked Alan if he hurt the woman. He got agitated, started fussing with his blankets, pulling at his restraints.”

  “Restraints?” I was horrified.

  “Apparently there was an incident earlier in the day. He threw something at the woman who came in to mop the floor. No one knows what triggered it. The doctor prescribed restraints until his meds are more effective.

  “The thing is, the lawyer showed up. I’m not sure why they let him in. Anyway, he was loud and arrogant and demanded more money. Geo
rge held his ground but the sister, Regina, is it? She got upset, started crying. That got Alan and George upset.”

  He let us imagine the scene before he continued. “I figured the best thing to do was to ring the nurse’s bell. The two that rushed in were very take-charge, as nurses tend to be. One was a take-no-prisoners gal about my age and the younger one was a burly guy, so when they told us all to leave, even the lawyer didn’t give them any guff. We hustled out of the room and they directed us off the floor.”

  He stopped talking just long enough to be sure he had all of our attention.

  “As I see it, we have two problems. Number one, the lawyer has to be put in his place. He has to stop browbeating the family for more money. Far as I can see, he hasn’t done a lick of work. We’re not going to let him bleed the family dry.”

  He looked to Owen, who nodded forcefully.

  “Next problem, and this is where you two come in.” He gestured to Bridgy and me. “The sister is emotionally frail. Even with O’Mally’s support, George is going to be crushed under the weight of his brother and his sister. Whenever you can, try to distract her. Keep her away from her brothers. Less stress for Alan and it’ll give George some room to breathe. What do you say?”

  Of course we agreed. The only problem was how.

  Chapter Twenty-five ||||||||||

  The next morning, through the café window, I saw Mark Clamenta walking across the parking lot toward the front door of the Read ’Em and Eat. I took off my apron and went behind the counter to grab my purse. I checked the time and realized he was a few minutes early. Ophie hadn’t arrived to help Bridgy while I was gone, but I was sure she’d turn up soon.

  The door opened and I heard Mark say, “After you, pretty lady.”

  And Ophie pranced into the café like a nominee on Oscar night. She actually did that “index finger on her chin while batting her eyelashes” thing that the southern belles perfected decades ago in black-and-white movies. “Why thank you, sir. It’s delicious to know there are still some gentlemen left in the world.”