by Marni Mann
I don’t want her money. I just want her. And I want her here with me. But, if that’s what makes her feel like she’s an equal in this relationship, I’ll take whatever she wants to give me, and then I’ll hand it right back to her in gifts.
A few weeks have passed since we moved in together, and things have been going better than both of us thought. Time isn’t torturing our relationship. It’s what is making us stronger. But I’m still unsure about my career and where it’ll take me, and that’s weighing over both of our heads.
Florida is Tilly’s home. It’s never been mine. And I’m not sure that I really fit in here. It doesn’t feel like a place I can get used to. The weather’s too perfect, and everything shines a little too much. I need city. Grit. I need seasons and food trucks and honking.
I need Boston.
But that’s my place, not Piper’s. Her family and her job are here. Both make her so happy, and I can’t ask her to give those up. However, my decision to leave will have to come soon because I can’t keep living on a permanent vacation. It just isn’t me. I need to be challenged, to feel the energy that I used to get from hockey.
I’m on the verge of asking Jesse to set up some interviews with the gigs he emailed to me, but first, I want to talk to Eddy. This morning is our scheduled weekly chat, and Piper’s still asleep, so I go out onto the balcony and give him a call.
“West, my man,” Eddy says as he answers. “How’s the weather in paradise? It’s cold as hell here, so tease me with some tropical talk.”
“Hot as fuck already, and it’s not even seven. The beach will be packed soon, and I’ll have to wait in line for over an hour just to score some decent lunch.”
“Sounds like you’re looking forward to it.”
I laugh. “It’s been a nice vacation, but it might be time for me to go home.”
I’m surprised by how much I tell Eddy during our phone calls since I’m not normally one to open up. But what we’ve established over the phone is an understanding of each other’s lives, a friendship where nothing is off-limits. There is no judgment. Just someone to listen, to help me work things out when my thoughts are too clouded. Of course, I usually do most of the talking, but Eddy knows I’ll listen whenever he needs it.
“Really?” he says. “I thought it would have taken a little longer for the city to start calling you back.”
“I miss it, man. Not just the ice. I mean, all of it.”
“Have you watched a game yet?”
The guys are scheduled to play Tampa in a few weeks, and I’m planning on going to the game. Eddy knows that. He also knows I’ve started watching the highlights on ESPN, just enough that I can hear the standings and injury reports and see highlights of each game.
“Not a full one. I’m getting there.”
“You’re doing a hell of a lot better than I was back then.”
I lean over the edge of the banister and look down at the pool. The cabanas are full already, and the waitresses are holding trays of tropical drinks. Within an hour, the music will start blasting, and the beach will be too packed to even find a place to sit. Whether I move up north or not, I have to get out of this hotel.
“I’ve been thinking of taking a trip home,” I say. “Asking Jesse to put some interviews together and seeing how it feels to get back into that mode again. Doesn’t mean I have to commit to anything, but it might be nice to hear their offers in person and see if I like the way it feels to wear a suit instead of a jersey and pads.”
“You know that means you’re going to have to shave your beard.”
“Fuck, forget it then.”
We both chuckle, and I run my fingers through the thick whiskers. I haven’t trimmed it much since I moved here. Piper loves it. I spend so much time between her legs, I thought she’d have a beard burn from the way it rubbed the inside of her thighs. But, no, my girl only wants more of it.
“I need to know something,” I say.
“Ask away.”
“Why didn’t you ever go back to Philly and commentate there? Why did you go straight to Denver and make that your home base?”
I hear him swallow his coffee, a sound he makes throughout all our chats. “Philly wasn’t my home; my team was. I’m from Denver, so when I was forced to retire, it just made sense to go back. My wife is from here, too.”
That’s the difference between us.
Boston is my city. It’s a place that understands my personality; it accepts me. It was there for me long before hockey. Boston didn’t give up on me. I gave up on my town.
“My travels take me back to Philly, and I enjoy it when I get to work there,” he says, “but Denver’s where I need to be. And it sounds like you know where you need to be.”
“I think so. But I have to make sure, and the only way to do that is to go visit.”
“Nothing’s stopping you, man.”
He’s wrong about that. Something is stopping me, and that gorgeous woman is sleeping naked inside my hotel room.
When I met Tilly, she so easily fit into my life. She had nothing to give up, and she moved right in, like she was meant to date someone who was always on the road.
Not Piper. She has a career. Dreams. She has kids who rely on her.
This time, it won’t be so easy.
I might be going to Boston alone, and there’s a chance the move could be the end of us.
“We’ll see how it feels when I get there. Then, I’m sure I’ll be blowing up your phone again.”
We both laugh.
God, it feels good to laugh with someone who understands these struggles.
Piper
I slept way later than I should have, but it felt so good to be in bed with someone I could trust that I didn’t want to budge.
West got up early and did his morning routine, but I already had his smile, and I didn’t have to bother with putting on clothes and jogging to the beach to catch a glimpse. Instead, I took a taste of my favorite dimple and lay my head back on the pillow, certain that what we had wasn’t a mistake but rather a beautiful beginning. A chance meeting that decided it never wanted to end.
But, as soon as I fully wake up, that contentment is replaced with worry. West isn’t here for me to get lost in, and I’m forced to face reality. The reality that Cannon has frozen our accounts because he knows whom I ran to when I moved out of the house.
Why he’s being so spiteful when he has someone else, too, I don’t know. He just is.
And I can’t figure out why he’s using money against me other than the fact that it’s the one thing he thinks I still need from him. That’s where he’s wrong. I never needed a dollar from my husband. All I asked for was love and affection, to be treated with respect and to be treasured, and I don’t think that was ever an unreasonable request.
We both cheated.
We both screwed up.
But what Cannon chose to do goes far beyond what I did with West. Sure, it doesn’t make it right, but I’m the one who has to get over it. And he’s the one who has to process the guilt of living a double life.
Once I’m showered, I leave a note on the fridge, letting West know I went out for a little while. Even a trip to the grocery store is embarrassing because, without access to my bank account, I can’t take any money out or use my debit card. My only choice is to accept the cash West keeps leaving in my purse, his silent show of support until I’m back on my own two feet. I love that he’s here for me, but I still hate using the money.
I’ll repay him later. Every last penny I spend will be returned to his bank account.
But the day only gets more expensive when I start my car, roll down the window, and the gas light comes on. I pound the steering wheel, pissed I’ll have to throw some of West’s cash into my gas tank.
“Car trouble?”
I turn my head and stare at Tilly leaning against her pearly-white Range Rover. It’s brand-new, and I’m sure, if she opened the door, the ocean breeze would waft the new-car smell right through my win
dow.
“What’s wrong?” she asks. “Forget how to open that mouth of yours? Or is your jaw just too tired from sucking my husband off all night?”
“Why are you here, Tilly?” I don’t have the strength to sit in the sweltering heat, listening to her bitch. I just don’t.
She walks around to the other side of my car and opens the door. Climbing in, she fans her face and looks around. “This is pathetic, Piper. Really fucking pathetic.”
My car isn’t old, but it’s not new either. I bought it brand-new with my own money a few years back and have taken care of it. It’s not pathetic; it just didn’t cost a fortune. “I didn’t ask you to get in.”
“But that’s the thing; you kind of did,” she says as she drums her acrylic nails against her purse.
I stare at her, waiting for her to continue. But she takes her sweet time, picking at her nails and checking her lipstick in the mirror on the back of the sun visor.
“Aren’t you tired?” she finally asks.
“If this is about West, I don’t want to argue. I’m sorry things happened the way they did and that we’re both moving in new directions. But—”
“Oh, cut the shit,” she says, interrupting my attempt to keep the peace. “You’re not sorry you’re fucking West.”
“I’m sorry we did it behind your back. That wasn’t right, and I know how it feels. It sucks, finding out someone you care about did you wrong.”
“Well, you’re right about that. But at least my husband wasn’t taking it up the ass. West loves doggy-style, but he never pounded into me, wishing I were another man. Although that was an added bonus I hadn’t seen coming.”
“What do you mean, added bonus?” I ask her.
God, I want to smack her. She’s here for a reason though, a reason beyond rubbing my husband’s sexuality in my face. And she’s not going to leave until she says what she needs to say.
She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. As she stares through me, the smile morphs into something comparable to revenge, and my heart starts to race. I knew all along that Tilly was capable of anything. We might have been civil through emails, but we owe each other nothing. Other than handing over our spouses for a couple of hours of fun a night, that’s where our bond ended.
“Payback is a bitch, Piper. That’s why, when I saw the chance to fuck your husband, I took it.”
“What are you talking about, Tilly?”
I’m afraid to ask, but I have to keep her talking. I have to find out what it is she wants from me. Maybe she is just angry and needs to speak her piece, and then she’ll be able to move on. But I think it’s more than that. Whatever is spinning around in her mind is about to be unleashed, and I’m pretty sure it’ll be at my expense.
“Do you really think I messaged you on the swingers site because of Cannon? I mean, he’s successful, but I can get sex anywhere. Kinky, dirty fucking, any way I want it.”
“I’m not following,” I tell her.
She’s not making sense. And, if she’s after something, then I wish she’d just say so.
Staring out the window, she says, “Does the name Chad Turner ring a bell?”
I swallow, and the little beads of sweat around my hairline start to trickle down my forehead. “He’s my ex. I dated him before Cannon.”
“Yeah, well, so did I. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”
“Honestly, no. Did you go to Florida State?”
“No,” she says, “I didn’t. But you’d have known who I was long before now if you’d opened your eyes. You never pay attention though. You think you’re entitled to every man who looks your direction.”
“That’s not true, Tilly. Before West, I never once entertained the idea of sleeping with another man. I was committed to my husband. And every boyfriend before him, I was loyal to.”
“You were so committed, you needed to swing? That just doesn’t make sense.”
“It doesn’t matter why Cannon and I decided to swing, Tilly. That’s my business. Not yours. Just like your reasons are your own.”
“Whatever,” she says. “Anyway, I didn’t go to Florida State, but I lived close, and I went to all the parties. All the ones Chad threw, except one.”
“He was in a frat, so, yeah, he liked to party. What’s your point?”
“The point is, I wasn’t feeling good and told Chad I couldn’t make it to his house that night. There was this big end-of-semester party, and he really wanted me there. I mean, who wouldn’t? Anyway, I pulled my sick ass out of bed, and when I got to the party, you were there.”
I remember the party she’s talking about. It wasn’t the first time I hung out with Chad though. We saw each other on campus—in between classes and during the two classes we had together. We got along well, and he was a lot of fun. In the end, he wasn’t my type at all. I’m pretty sure, if we had tried to make it work, we’d have killed each other. But I swear, I had no idea he’d had a girlfriend.
And that’s exactly what I tell Tilly, “I didn’t know he was seeing someone else.”
“Seems to be an ongoing problem with you, doesn’t it? First, Chad. Now, Cannon. You must really suck in bed.”
“Please get out of my car.”
I’m not going to sit here and be torn apart, so she can feel better about herself. Not everything is about her and sex. Sometimes, two people just click, and they want to spend more time together.
“I’m not leaving until you tell me about Chad. He was mine, Piper. He had a huge trust fund. His dad even golfed with mine. Everything was in place until you came along and fucked it up.”
“Just like you came along and got in the middle of my relationship with Cannon? How does that make you any better than me?”
“Oh, come on,” she says. “I can’t help it that this opportunity fell into my lap. I’d have been stupid not to have a little fun. After all, that’s what you did to me.”
“I told you, I didn’t know Chad had a girlfriend.”
“Did you fuck him that night at the party, Piper?”
I debate lying, but something tells me she already knows the truth. That she’s done enough research over the years to bury me without batting her eyelashes twice, especially if her family knows Chad as well as she said.
“We had sex, Tilly. But I didn’t know he wasn’t available.”
“Did you even bother to ask?” she says with enough bite that I know she’s pissed. Really fucking pissed.
“Why would I have asked? He asked me out on a date. That usually means you’re single.”
“Or maybe you just didn’t care. You fucked my husband behind my back. That’s what you do. But I promise you, you’ll never have what it takes to keep him satisfied, Piper. West has needs, very specific tastes, and he likes it often. So, I suggest you walk away before you crash and burn again. He’s been through enough.”
“And, if I walked away, you’d leave me alone?”
“Probably not.” She laughs. “Nothing brings me greater satisfaction than watching you squirm.” She holds out her cell phone and shows me a picture of her fucking Cannon’s ass with the strap-on. “I have a ton of pictures just like this one. Some are a little more adventurous than others, but he loves it deep and hard. I’d be happy to send this one to you for those lonely nights you want to reminisce.”
I can’t look at the picture, and I can’t be in this hot car with her for another minute, so I throw open my door and climb out. My whole body’s shaking.
I have a bad feeling that whatever she’s doing, this is only the beginning. If she’s had a vendetta against me since Chad and knew I was on those forums and swinging sites, she’s been watching me for a while. I just can’t figure out why she’s only now cashing in, and I’m scared to find out what else will happen if I don’t do what she wants.
Walking away from West isn’t an option though. I couldn’t leave him if I tried. All I can do is hold my purse against my chest and walk as fast as I can toward the hotel.
/> She yells at my back, needing the last word. “West is going to get so bored with you, Piper! You’ll see!”
Maybe she’s right. Maybe West and I were never meant to make it this far. Because, if Tilly has any say, I’ll be alone, broke, and begging for my old life back.
West
I’m on my way back from the gym when I see Tilly’s Range Rover weaving through the parking lot of the hotel. There’s no need for her to be here unless she’s fucking a tourist. Not that I’d put it past her, but she just closed on her parents’ business today, so something tells me the reason she’s here has nothing to do with her pussy.
I take a left into the lot, slowing as I get closer, and then I roll down my window. She pulls up next to me, and as the glass moves down, revealing her face, I say, “Looking for me?”
Lots of makeup cover her cheeks, and dark glasses hide her eyes. Weeks later, and she’s still wearing a mask. If I didn’t know her so well, I would think her smile meant she was actually happy, but I don’t think my ex is capable of that emotion.
“Don’t flatter yourself, West. I’m not here to see you.” Her voice is so sharp that it bites me.
“Then, why are you at my hotel?”
“The manager is a client. I came here to drop something off for him. And this isn’t your hotel. It’s his. Not everything revolves around you.”
I want to believe her, but I don’t.
The manager has access to all the water sports he can ever possibly want right down on the beach behind the hotel. Tilly is competition, not an ally. But she’d never admit to why she was really here. It isn’t her style. She wants the fight, but I don’t care enough to give it to her.
I pull forward a few inches and look over my shoulder to say, “Lloyd texted me this morning and said you closed on the business. Congrats.”
She moves her glasses to the top of her head. I don’t know what she’s scheming, but something is brewing in those eyes. “Are you looking for a thank-you? Because you’re not going to get one from me. I swallowed enough of your cum to earn me that business.”
I could dig so fucking low and say so many hateful things to her. But that isn’t me.