Praefatio: A Novel

by Georgia McBride

  I disrupted Arcturus’s rant. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “Do I look like I’m joking? That’s like the first two days or so—and—that’s just the academics part.”

  “Yeah,” Caius chimed in. “Then you have to do weapons, intelligence, and self-defense, and combat training.”

  I stood staring at the two of them, who looked as if we were having the most natural conversation in the world. Arcturus laughed and said, “Yeah, and wait till finals. You’re gonna wish you’d stayed human.”

  Silence.

  More silence.

  Deafening silence.

  I couldn’t stand it anymore.

  “When am I going to get to see Gavin?”

  Arcturus made a sour face, then said, “We cannot take you to him, nor can you summon him here.”

  “Well, if I can’t see Gavin, can you take me to see my dad?” It was the same thing Remi had told me when he’d found me writing letters to Him, before I knew who he was. He told me I shouldn’t summon him.

  “Sure! We can take you to see Gabriel.” Caius seemed proud as he stood with his chest out and offered me his hand. “Arcturus, alert the guards.”

  “There are only three of us; we don’t need to alert the cherubim guards, doofus.” Arcturus thought for a second and added, “And you’re gonna need a decoy so your humans will think you are safely tucked in bed, resting from your stint at the hospital.”

  “A decoy? Like a body double?” My mind was racing with wild scenarios, none of which made any sense.

  “Yep. You’ll be able to teleport the part of you that is conscious while your unconscious body remains asleep in your room. You’ll have limited response capabilities, and if you need to quickly return to your body for any reason, you can reanimate it within seconds. No one will notice a thing. No human, anyway.”

  That must have been what happened the other night when I left my body at the hospital and no one could actually see me—except Remi. I shook my head in disbelief, then walked over to my bed and climbed in. I pulled the covers over me, closed my eyes, and drifted into a comfortable but not fully-asleep sleep. I called my conscious spirit awake and out of my body. It separated and walked toward the boys, while my body lay in bed. They smiled, grabbed my hand, and pulled me into the Garden.

  ***

  The cherubs frolicked in the water, and as I noticed them noticing my every move, I pondered what my life had become. Though we had barely spoken since meeting, I felt completely bonded with these boys. I felt as though they were a part of me. I knew I would come to rely on them, that maybe I already did. A smile crept onto my face as I watched them.

  While they played in water, neither of them was at all wet. As each bead of water caught the light, a full rainbow formed from one to the next. Is everything celestial so stunning? I wondered.

  I heard his approach before I saw him. Dad walked clear across the field from behind the tree that lived in the center of the Garden. The Tree of Life. Even before I thought the questions, the answers came to me from information stored in my mind from childhood, past experiences, books I’d read. Dad stood right in front me, smiling like a proud father. He looked real, whole, human, only more … divine, as light emanated from him.

  We embraced.

  “Gracie, I missed you,” Dad whispered as he pulled me into a walk beside him.

  Four curious and protective eyes followed me as I took my first step.

  “Dad,” I held his arm tightly. “I missed you too. Things seemed so final at the hospital. Jenny was attacked, and now she’s sick, and Gavin said I had to go and live with him, and Remi’s acting all weird, blocking his mind from—”

  Dad cut me off. “Gracie, please. You must calm down. Just listen, okay? Can you listen to your … can you listen to me for a minute?” he pleaded and turned slightly to face me. In the spot where we’d stopped walking, a stone bench with intricate carvings of lions, lambs, and angels appeared in front of us. We sat and faced one another.

  “When I no longer had a human body to inhabit, it was impossible for me to stay with you and Remi. I was tasked with the training of your cherubs.” He beamed. “Because I was closest to you, I was asked to weigh in on what you would need in order to make a proper transition from pure human to Archangel. We wanted to make your ascension easier, less troubling. We also wanted to protect you from those who seek to destroy you.”

  More answers invaded my head. Dad had died for me, to protect me. He had completed his task of raising me as a human, and as I was about to ascend, I needed even more protection and teaching.

  I couldn’t decide whether to convulse in guilt or hug him. Tears refused to be held back.

  The sky darkened above us, and the sound of a sword being unsheathed echoed in the air from across the clearing. I turned to see Arcturus running toward me. He had a look on his face, the same one from that night with Jenny. It was not comforting.

  Rain fell around us, but the cherubs remained dry. Tiny circular pellets formed rainbows in the air as they fell from Caius’s hair and exploded in a spray of color and light when they reached the ground. Caius readied a sick-looking crossbow, and when I looked around it was as if everything was happening in slow motion. Not again.

  Someone’s going to die.

  Caius and Arcturus stood ready to attack what or whomever it was that needed attacking. I saw no one.

  Claps of thunder ripped through the darkened gray sky one after the other. Then silence.

  I turned to Dad, but he was staring at the ground below, which had begun to rumble beneath a torrential downpour. Thunder cracked the sky open, stopping the rain, and for a split second, we heard nothing. Everything had stopped. I opened my mouth to speak. Then I looked around and saw that everything in the Garden was dark, dreary, and nearly dead, except the Tree.

  “Dad?” I inched closer to him. What force could do such a thing?

  “The Fallen are moving low in the sky. We must be on alert. But now that you’ve ascended, I suppose you can see. Look up.”

  Oh my God. The dark clouds moving aren’t clouds at all!

  “That’s right. They’re the wings of newly Fallen being escorted out of the heavens. Escorting Fallen requires various alert systems, which translates often into bad and sometimes severe weather, if a Fallen or two tries to escape to earth or becomes otherwise rowdy. The storms can get pretty bad.”

  With tears in my eyes, I watched as they passed overhead. It was like I’d been asleep my entire life. To see the world as an angel was to see the world completely awake—alive.

  “So not all angels fall to earth?”

  “No. Most of them are sent … elsewhere entirely.” Something grabbed Dad’s attention away from blowing my mind.

  Dad reached down to pick a newly sprouted dandelion from the ground in front of him. It had grown as a result of the strange, awful weather. He pulled the flower out of the ground. It was … alive. He handed me the yellow flower, then leaned back.

  The thing had a face. It opened its one bug eye, blinked deliberately, looked straight at me, and began to speak. I nearly dropped it, but Dad propped my hand up and steadied it. Arcturus and Caius were both ready to take it out—Arcturus, to chop off its tiny head, and Caius, to shoot it, dead.

  “I am Proseran, a Fallen Angel, a Watcher. I sit between the edge of the heavens and your earth monitoring the activities of my brethren. I’ve been granted Divine Favor in this time of great need. Let me please say, it is an honor to meet you.” The thing bowed its petaled head. “High Priestess Tia has allowed me entrance, to address you here … in this place.” He paused and then offered, “I apologize if my presence has caused a disturbance. But the transport provided me with cover—so it would not be discovered that it was I who hath aided in your escape.” He bowed again and looked around nervously.

  I couldn’t read his thoughts. At the time I had no idea what he was talking about.

  “Speak freely, Fallen, and get to the point. My daughter …
Grace will receive you,” Dad ordered.

  I held the flower in my palm, extending my arm as far out as possible. Its roots wrapped around my hand and wiggled like worms, giving me the creeps.

  “Tonight you must write a letter announcing your intention to leave home and not return. It is the only way to save the lives of your human caregivers and friends. Accept refuge at Kheiron to insure your safekeeping, and the Fallen will accept you as their own.” He inhaled deeply and wrinkled his jagged eyebrows.

  I looked at Dad, and he nodded as if the flower was right, that I should do as it instructed. I turned back to the talking weed.

  “Seekers will come for you just before midnight, intent on your death. And they will not stop this time until they have achieved their goal. You would do best to heed my words. Until we meet again.” He bowed once more. It did little to soften his message of doom.

  The flower fell instantly out of my hand and onto the ground. It rested near my foot and died. Its roots, however, clung to me; the wormy things tried to get under my skin. I shook my hand violently to get them off. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dad nod toward somewhere in the distance. Caius descended upon me, grabbed my wrist, and blew air into my hand, which caught on fire. The roots began to burn, screaming as they did. And then, so did my skin.

  “Are you crazy?” I shouted to Dad and Caius.

  “Numbskull! She’s human!” Dad proclaimed as if I had polio and Caius had asked me to run a 5K.

  Arcturus approached with water from the stream; it both cooled and healed my hand instantly. “Sorry about that. You can’t trust the Fallen, Grace. That’s the bottom line,” Arcturus stated with full certainty and followed with a death stare to Caius and Dad.

  “No matter how well intended they are,” Dad added, as if Arcturus hadn’t already made his point. I supposed they were talking about Gavin. I remembered Gavin’s comments regarding Praefatio and what he’d claimed it said about us.

  “Praefatio,” Dad began, reading my mind, “is our book. Humans have the Bible and we have Praefatio. We have rules and commandments too, you know. It applies to all angels, something The Divine One gave to us after the Fall of some of our most cherished. Contrary to popular belief, it isn’t simply a book for the Fallen. How Praefatio develops on the page depends on its owner. Sure, it tells us about you and Gavin, but how it ultimately ends up isn’t up to Praefatio; it’s up to you.”

  Silence settled in the air.

  “Owner? How it develops? What the heck does that mean?”

  “Praefatio is different for everyone. The core basics like the commandments, rules, and regulations remain the same. And then the history and prophecies are the same. But the future—your individual future—belongs to you and only you. Once you own your destiny, and your part in the future of the world, you are free to pass Praefatio along to someone else who may need it. I assume Remi has already made peace with his fate.”

  “So Remi gave me his book?” I asked in a quiet voice.

  Dad’s voice was nearly as quiet. I guess he didn’t want to upset me further. “Remi’s job was to be a brother to you as you grew up, to help make life as a human easier and to help keep you safe when the Seekers came for you that night. You had to make it until your next birthday.”

  I felt immediately guilty. Remi’s life until then had been completely devoted to me. It must have been hard for him, living in my shadow all those years.

  “Yes,” Dad interrupted my thoughts. “Remi struggles with his heritage, having been raised around humans his entire life. Fifteen years is a long time for a young angel to remain on earth. But he is strong, and when it is required of him, he will do what needs to be done.”

  “Remi’s heritage.” Mom and Dad had spent so much time arguing about it, and I had always assumed they’d meant his ethnicity and the fact that he was adopted and biracial. Seems I wasn’t as smart as I’d thought.

  Dad placed a finger to his lips, making a shh sound as he did. “Remi’s path is for Remi to worry about, not you,” he insisted.

  “Hi, Grace, I’m Marcus,” a voice behind me chimed in during the lull in conversation. I turned sharply to face the speaker. I could have been looking at Remi’s twin, several years older, with slightly darker skin and hazel eyes. With wings outstretched and a broad smile on his face, the stranger added, “Thanks for looking after Remi all these years.” He extended his hand to shake mine, and when we touched, I knew exactly who he was.

  Remi’s father, I thought to myself, and couldn’t stop the smile that exploded across my face. I jumped up and rounded the bench so fast I would have been a blur to the human eye. As I grabbed Marcus into a bear hug, it was clear that he and Remi had the same pureness of heart.

  I had so many questions. They invaded my mind so fast that my mouth had trouble keeping up. It was the one time I was thrilled angels could read minds.

  “So,” I started slowly. “I don’t understand. Remi said his parents were punished, made human.” Dad smiled, then excused himself with a slight bow to me.

  “Remi said you could be pretty human at times,” Marcus responded, but not to my question. I don’t think he intended to hurt my feelings. “We were punished. The order had been given. But when Remi’s mother died giving birth, The Divine One decided my eternally broken heart was punishment enough for us both. He decided to give me a kind of celestial ‘time-out’ by placing me here in the Garden forever. Don’t you see? I can never go home, or even to earth to see my son.”

  “Can Remi ever visit?”

  “He used to visit. But he’s come a lot less lately, and I’m concerned in light of his latest stunts.” Marcus’s thoughts turned to worry for his only son.

  I figured the rest out on my own. Marcus was thrilled when Dad was chosen to raise Remi. Unlike humans, angels were capable of unimaginable levels of love. Even though Remi was not raised by Marcus, each of them loved the other as if he had been. Remi had the same love for Gabriel as he did his own father.

  Arcturus was at my side without warning.

  “Sorry, Marcus. I need Grace for a minute.” Agitation creased Arcturus’s brow.

  “No worries, kid. Do what you gotta do,” Marcus said, then man-hugged Arcturus to himself quickly before releasing him in my direction. “Be well, Grace, and please tell Remi I said happy birthday.” It was the last thing he said before he walked briskly out of sight.

  A pang of regret hit me as I remembered that I’d forgotten all about Remi’s fifteenth birthday! That I could ever forget was a testament to my mental state. It was the day after mine.

  Arcturus took my hand and led me to the Garden’s east entrance, which was guarded by two cherubim with flaming swords that turned in each direction. At least that part was true. They seemed like harmless tweens, but I knew better. As I passed through and exited, the redheaded one with freckles shot me a look. They seemed serious, like the Queen’s Guard in England, though I had a feeling that trying to make them laugh was a horrible idea.

  The land around the Garden was barren and the sky above gray in stark contrast to inside the gates. I waited for Arcturus to tell me why he had dragged me from my conversation with Marcus.

  “Emeria, come forth!” Arcturus ordered in a voice that seemed deeper than it had before. He looked around suspiciously from left to right, then zeroed in on a translucent figure with a dim light glowing beneath its skin. It was my twin, the girl who’d tried to kill me.

  I felt faint, but steadied myself by grabbing onto Arcturus’s arm. Emeria looked harder, more complex than me. She had way more drama, for sure. And she seemed to go out of her way to get people to think she was dangerous. Emeria stood before us, outfitted in swords and other weapons, eyes fixed on Arcturus. The two blocked me from hearing their silent conversation.

  Angered by the disregard for my feelings, I imagined crushing water, like a dam breaking, and its water forcing itself through a town, smashing buildings and large structures. It worked. It broke their block on me. From the
looks of it, they had no idea that I heard the rest of the conversation.

  She has, Arcturus replied with caution. His words were strained, his body taut.

  Devious little one, aren’t you? Why’d you summon me here?

  Had she never met Arcturus before, I wondered? She would regret referring to him that way.

  “Reveal yourself to Grace and do not leave anything out,” Arcturus ordered, placing a hand on the top of his sword.

  “Is this really necessary?” Emeria shot back and used both hands to draw attention to her many weapons. She must have known Arcturus had no intention of letting her go until he’d gotten what he wanted.

  I wasn’t prepared for what happened next. Emeria grabbed me into her arms as if doing so to a ragdoll, covering me completely with her dark wings. I couldn’t hear or see anything at first. Then the visions came.

  They blew past me quickly. I saw myself, reading Praefatio, picturing Gavin in my mind as I read. I sat thinking of how much I loved him and wanted to be with him. After slamming the book shut, I began to dance and twirl around the room as intense feelings of love and affection overtook me. My closed eyes watered as I watched the vision unfold and listened to my racing heart. I hugged the book to myself while envisioning a life with him, marrying him and having a family. A knock at the door interrupted my rapture. I placed the book on my bed, then answered the knocking. My birth mom stood in the doorway, beautiful, and angry. A gasp forced itself out of my mouth when I laid eyes on her.

  The vision and the feelings that accompanied it were so real, vivid, and painful. But the memory could not have belonged to me.

  They’re her memories, Arcturus suggested, and the thought floated around in my brain like a ball in a pinball machine: hitting, fast, slowing, swirling, hitting, score.

  It felt like I’d gotten the wind kicked out of me. My heart sank into a deep and physical sadness when I realized what I had been witnessing. Emeria was in love with Gavin. The depths of her emotion were great enough that I could literally feel her pain. My breathing became labored.

  I turned to face Emeria in my mind’s eye and saw the rest from her point of view.